I Was Holding on to You

Part II

Dean picked up the towel and squeezed his hands dry, turning slowly to look at his brother. His heart thudded in his chest with joyful anticipation.

"Sammy?" he said gently, tossing the towel on to the drainer. He walked towards the place where his brother sat, still totally distracted by the object in his hand, innocently unaware that his previous actions had held any significance.

Crouching down beside Sam, Dean curled his hands around his brothers, and ducked his head until he caught his eye.

"Sammy?" he repeated. "You know that song? Huh? You remember it?"

Sam stared at him blankly and his breath began to hitch with panic. He wished desperately that he understood what Dean wanted from him, but he didn't. Too many words. Spoken too fast. He'd not been long relieved that the things he heard were beginning to hold some meaning, and not just an incomprehensible stream of jumbled sounds. Now though, Now he felt like he should be able to do this, he should be able to make his brother happy, just like Dean did for him. Why was it so hard?

Dean saw the look of anguish in his brother's eyes, and how his breathing had become suddenly laboured. The last thing he wanted was to cause Sam any more unnecessary stress.

Deciding that for now at least, maybe this wasn't such a good idea, he gave his brother's hands a reassuring squeeze.

"S'okay little brother, we'll take it slow." He said with a smile.

That smile as always, told Sam much more than the words ever could anyway. And even when he could understand, Dean wouldn't always need to say. That simple, silent gesture telling him that everything was okay. That It didn't matter and they could try again.

Dean held the thought for the moment, and handed Sam another object from his box of tricks. A wooden egg timer. Chuckling softly as he watched his siblings face light up in amusement, he turned to put away the remaining dishes and grabbed a beer from the fridge. Uncapping it and taking a long swig, he looked over as Sam who began to yawn and blink sleepily, hands rubbing at his eyes with exhaustion.

"Come on Sammy, let's get settled." He sighed, walking over and picking up the box. He held it out, gesturing for Sam to put the objects away. Sam complied, humming his understanding. He put the last object carefully away, and then blinked tiredly up at Dean, head titled, eyes tracing his brother's face with nothing but adoration. It was overwhelming at most, but Dean never reciprocated any less devotion for Sam. They fit together.

Dean grinned and chuckled quietly, holding out a hand to Sam, who promptly gripped and pulled himself out of the chair, wobbling unsteadily. Dean slipped a supporting arm around his waist, allowing Sam to lean against him slightly.

After a few moments they were both slumped on the couch, Sam with his head rested in Dean's lap as always, his brother's fingers threading through his hair in a soothing motion.

Dean looked down at his brother's face, eyes staring straight ahead, slow blinks as the tug of sleep began to pull at him. It was then that he decided he needed to try again.

With one hand still stroking his hair and the other rubbing calming circles on his back, he cleared his throat softly…

After the first few notes, he grinned to himself as Sam's eyes shot open, and he turned his head slightly to focus on the sound.

That sound. Sam felt like he knew it. And then there it was again; flickers of a memory dancing in to his mind for a brief moment. Distorted. Almost unrecognisable, except…there was that sound again. He closed his eyes and forced himself to push through the haze, clinging to the sound of Dean's voice overhead. And suddenly he had found what it was he was looking for.

Sam. Just- a- little- kid -Sam was lying on his bed sobbing after a nightmare. Dean, a little older but still just a kid himself, was lying next to him, one arm splayed across his shoulders and singing to him. Singing that song. The song his mom used to sing.

As quickly as it had appeared, the image fizzled out. But Sam still listened to the gentle hum of Dean's voice as he continued.

And he could have listened to that voice all night, but in the next few moments his eyes were giving in and drifting closed as sleep pulled him further, further away.

Dean sighed as he watched his brother drift off.

"You must remember that one Sammy". He insisted. "It's Hey Jude, used to sing it to you when you were a little kid."

He rubbed his hand across his face almost dejectedly, not really expecting an answer from his now-slumbering brother.

So When Sam nuzzled in to his lap, and mumbled,

"Y..yeah De..an…I…r..member."

Dean just couldn't hide his elation, and grinned from ear to ear with pride, pulling his brother close into a tight hug.

"That's great Sammy…That's awesome"