Making her mine
Fandom: How I met your mother
Pairing: Barney/Robin (small part Marshall/Lily)
Yes, I'm gonna write longer chapters... I hope.
1.
While she was the greatest competence in destroying relationship he knew, Lily Aldrin was also the one in having a working one. After all, this thing with her and Marshall lasted some time now, even with them breaking up, so she'd know how to act. (Of course one could say that Marshall had just as much knowledge as Lily, but c'mon, it was Marshall. He was just... well... not as manipulative as his wife. Furthermore, he couldn't be sure Marshall wouldn't tell Ted. Nah, Lily was the better choice.)
Another good thing about her: whenever he called, she was in no time in his apartment, complaining about his empty fringe and listening to whatever bothered him. And that was just what she was doing right now.
"Soo... you and Robin again? Man, never seen you this eager to keep a girl with you." Lily clearly had her fun teasing him while playing all incurious 'bout the whole situation. But that was okay, because he could see the smile beneath her eyes' expression. He knew she'd help him – she always did. And if only for the reason that she loved the feeling of being needed.
After he didn't really response – beside a little nod – she continued. "Okay, okay. You really wanna make her stay, right? So you need to get her thinking you're the only one possible. For that, you'll need to learn a lot of things."
"Oh, I'm already good with girls..."
"You're good with girls who want to get laid and you're good with getting rid of them. If you'd be as good with relationship as with this stuff, you wouldn't have called me in the first place. So. You gonna learn a lot of things. What's her favourite color, by the way?"
"Why would I know..."
"Because you're the one who wants to be her boyfriend – oh yeah, I know you hate this word, so don't gimme that look – and so you're also the one who should know 'bout stuff like that... and it is yellow, just so you know."
"Oh-kaaay." Most likely he'd be better off if he'd just listen to her. She was the expert.
"See? You need to get as much information 'bout her as possible, otherwise you won't be able to get her. Like... Things she likes?"
"...Guns?"
"...I guess that's a bad idea." Well, at least they agreed in something. The image of an angry Robin with a gun... not that she didn't have any on her own, but that was just... no way in hell.
But suddendly, he had an idea. "Thanks, Lily!"
"For...what?"
She didn't get an answer.