Disclaimer: If I did own Twilight, why in the name of Efron would I still be writing fan fictions?

ALICE

Never drag Bella out of bed for a shopping spree

Never sing Barbie Girl in front of the family

Never sing Barbie Girl in front of Emmett because he will sing as well and we all know how that will turn out…

Never give Jasper a chick flick and tell him to watch it - he'll get emotional - more than he could possibly get

Never greet Carlisle by saying 'What up Doctor McMuffin Head!'

Never give Edward's car a 'makeover'…

And accuse Bella saying it was her idea

Never sing High School Musical…

Or Jonas Brothers

Or anything related to Disney (which means no Hakuna Matata)

Never tell Edward that Bella is planning to go to LA to marry one of her celebrity infatuations…

Or Mike Newton

Never cut Esme's flowers to use on her dresses

Never tell Tanya that the reason Edward didn't like her was because she looked to fat…

And then laugh in her face after she had more than 2 plastic surgeries

"Come on, you guys, where's your sense of humour? You've got to admit, rule 14 and 15 were funny!" Alice laughed.

"Alice, poor Tanya now looks like a toilet brush!" Esme scolded.

"I thought it was funny." Rosalie, Bella and Emmett said together.

"Yeah, but Rosalie, you hated Tanya ever since she said your hair looks fake. Bella, you hate her for coming on to Edward; and we all know Emmett laughs at anything other than his embarrassing moments!" Carlisle retorted.

They all stopped when they saw Edward writing on the piece of paper. "What are you doing?" Alice asked, narrowing her eyes.

"If I get 20 rules, you're getting 20 rules!" Edward explained and he gave them the piece of paper so they could look at it…

16. Never make Bella look like a biker chick and say it was for Jacob Black

17. Never make Bella look really nice so Edward bites her

18. Never say 'I know something about Bella that you don't know' over and over just to annoy Edward

19. Never give Rosalie a haircut

20. Never run around Bella's house screaming 'Bella and Edward run off to Vegas' when Charlie's there.