A/N: Hey everybody! Sorry for not updating sooner – I was working on my one-shot, Perfect. Anyway, I'd like to thank followthesmile, Cullens4everandever, AliceCullenLivesForever, Da Phoenix 13, Permanent Rose, eccentricity is a virtue, Halfelven hero and twinklestartwinkle for taking the time to review! Enjoy the chapter!

SATURDAY MORNING

Bella: Hold on a second…it's sunny today! In Forks!? Something is horribly wrong!

Mike: Hey Bella! Aren't you so excited to go to the beach? It's so good that it's just as friends, you know without any weird, inhumanly beautiful people.

Bella: Yeah…great. I just need to find something to eat and we'll get going. Now, where'd I put the granola bars?

Mike: Third cupboard to the left, second shelf. Uh…I mean…that's where I would keep my granola bars, if I were you. Of course I didn't follow you and Cullen home yesterday…hehe…

Bella: (sighing) I miss Edward. He sure wouldn't follow me home or watch me sleep.

(Bella, Mike and the rest of the humans get into Mike's car and drive to La Push. When they get to the beach, they see some members of the Quiliuete tribe)

Jacob: Hey Bella, do you remember me? The random little kid from your miserable childhood holidays here?

Bella: Sure I do, Lake!

Jacob: It's Jake.

Bella: Exactly.

Jacob: Well…anyway…you've gotten, like, really hot, Bella. Would you like to go for a walk with my while I tell you weird stories that have absolutely nothing to do with the guy you sit beside in Biology.

Bella: (batting eyelashes) That sounds great!

(They both stand up and start walking towards a conveniently placed forest)

Jacob: Uh, Bells? Is there something in your eye?

Bella: What? Um…no! Why would you think that? (she strikes a bad flirtatious pose) So…are you going to tell me those weird stories?

Jacob: Okay! Once upon a time, my tribe used to be some freaky werewolves because…well, I don't know why…but we were really awesome and we ran around our town protecting everyone from these really pretty people with sharp teeth.

Bella: They sound vaguely familiar…

Jacob: Yeah, they were also really cold, and it turned out they were these evil vampires! But then they went away, which was cool. But the rumor is that they've come back! Which isn't good. And then we all lived happily ever after. The End!

Bella: Whoa, that is a weird story. Heh. (realization hits Bella like a ton of bricks) Hold on, what you're saying is… THE GUY THAT I LIKE IS A VAMPIRE!?

Jacob: WHAT!?

Bella: Um…just kidding!

Jacob: (blinking) Oh! Phew.

BACK IN FORKS

Bella: Okay, I've just found out the guy I sit beside in Biology is a vampire…what should I do? I know, I'll check the internet!

Internet: Vampires are generally nasty people. Do not go near them, because they will probably suck your blood. Which is a bad thing. They are super strong, fast and smart, not to mention really scary. However, if they happen to be the type of vampire with golden eyes and extremely good looks that sit beside you in Biology, then why are you checking this website? Go ask them out!

Bella: Huh. Well, Edward is really good looking…maybe he's a nice vampire! Like Casper the Friendly Ghost! Wow, I sit beside a super-hot-vampire-who-will-by-no-means-kill-me for Biology! How cool is that?

(Pleased with her deductions, Bella logs off her computer and goes to sleep)

AT SCHOOL

Jessica: Hey, like, Bella! Guess who, like, asked me to, like, the dance!

Bella: Oh, I don't know...Mike?

Jessica: Ohmigosh! You are, like, totally, like, right!

Bella: What a surprise.

Jessica: I know! Anyway, like, me and Angela are, like, going shopping for, like, dresses! Wanna come with?

Bella: Well, I was going to skulk around being depressed because I'm in love with a vampire...but I guess I could go dress shopping.

(Bella, Angela and Jessica drive to Port Angeles where the latter two look for dresses. Bella soon becomes bored)

Bella: I'm bored. I think I'll wander down that sinister-looking dark alley in search of a bookstore.

Random men: Come here so that we can beat you up and take advantage of you!

Bella: Oh no! How did I not see this coming? Who will save me now?

Edward: You've got to be joking.

Bella: (backing away from the creepy men) Hello? A vampire saviour would be nice right about now!

Edward: Fine, but you owe me big time.

(Edward speeds down the alley in his Volvo, muttering about 'whiney humans'. He rescues Bella (yet again) and drives away from the gross men)

Bella: Oh, hey, Edward! Fancy seeing you here.

Edward: Do you have a problem with not dying?

Bella: Huh. Maybe.

Edward: Unbelievable. So, where do you want to have dinner?

Bella: With you?

Edward: Well, obviously! I don't trust myself to not turn around and go hunt down those sons of –

Bella: Hey! Let's keep it G-rated here.

Edward: Sorry.

Bella: Anyway, I'd love to go to dinner with you, even though my friends are probably worried sick and I know for a fact that you could kill me.

Edward: (not listening) That's nice.

(As they arrive at the restaurant, they meet a frantic Jessica and Angela)

Jessica: Bella! Where, like, were you?

Angela: We were really worried. What happened?

Bella: Well, I was herded down this dark alleyway by some sick-minded guys, and then Edward, the bloodsucking vampire here, came to my aid.

Jessica: That's, like, a relief. We, like, thought something, like, bad had happened!

Angela: Jess, let's leave Edward and Bella to get dinner while we discuss their social standing on the ride home!

Jessica: That sounds, like, great!

(Jessica and Angela walk off merrily)

Bella: (sighing) I have such great friends.

(Bella and Edward enter the restaurant)

Amber: Hi, I'm Amber and I'll be serving you while constantly hitting on your cute boyfriend all evening!

Bella: I don't have to pay extra, do I?

(In a mere ten minutes, Edward watches as Bella shovels a plate of ravioli at top speed into her mouth)

Bella: So, you can read minds?

Edward: I can...well, except for yours.

Bella: That's weird.

Edward: Thanks a bunch.

Bella: No, no! I was talking about you not being able to read my mind. Am I freak, or something?

Edward: In my opinion, yes, but I don't think that's why I can't read your mind.

Amber: (to Edward) Can I get you anything else? Coke, dessert, my phone number...

Edward: What was that last one?

Amber: Dessert.

Edward: Oh. Well, I guess we'll be going... (he hands her a million dollar bill)

Amber: We can't wait to have you with us again!

Bella: Don't count on it.

IN THE VOLVO

Bella: Okay, I think I've finally figured out what you are.

Edward: Please don't say a wizard.

Bella: Very funny. No, I was talking to my friend Jacob, who I will totally not become infatuated with next year, and he gave me reason to believe you're a vampire.

Edward: (shiftily) Now where would he get an idea like that?

Bella: His Daddy is some kind of elder on this werewolf council thing.

Edward: Shoot.

Bella: So it's true...I'm sitting in a car with a bloodsucking vampire!?

Edward: Uh huh.

Bella: That was pretty stupid. What was I thinking?

Edward: Beats me.

Bella: Well, aren't you gonna eat me?

Edward: No! Not if I can help it! My family only drinks the blood of animals.

Bella: You suck the blood of defenceless animals? That's horrible!

Edward: Would you rather I drank your blood?

Bella: Good point.

(The car is filled with an uncomfortable silence. Bella glances at the speedometer)

Bella: HOLY COW! YOU'RE GOING TO KILL ME!!

Edward: What?! But I just said –

Bella: LOOK HOW FAST WE'RE GOING! WE'RE GONNA CRASH INTO SOME BIG TREE AND THEN THE CAR'S GONNA BLOW UP AND –

Edward: (slowing down) Calm down, Bella, I just enjoy driving fast.

Bella: YOU INSANE MANIAC! WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?!

Edward: We've been over this.

Bella: Oh yeah. Perhaps I overreacted.

Edward: Just a tad. We're here by the way.

(Bella looks up and finds she is, sure enough, at her house)

Bella: Whoa. How'd that happen? Oh right, your insane driving.

Edward: Do you hate me now?

Bella: Of course not! How could I hate you, Edward? You're incredibly ho – uh – kind to me. Um...see you tomorrow!

(Bella runs inside, tripping on the doormat in the process)

THE NEXT MORNING

Bella: Well, off to another boring day of school! (she walks out the door and catches sight of the Volvo) What the –

Edward: Want a ride to school?

Bella: YES!! ...Ahem...I mean, that'd be cool.

Edward: I brought you a jacket; I didn't want you to get a cold.

Bella: Thanks (she puts on the jacket, inhaling Edward's scent)

Edward: Why are you sniffing my jacket?

Bella: Um...no reason...

(Bella and Edward arrive at school and both leave for their respective classes. Jessica corners Bella in Trig and demands information)

Jessica: I, like, totally demand information about, like, last night.

Bella: Well, he bought me dinner, drove me home, admitted he was a vampire –

Jessica: He's, like, a WHAT?!

Students: Shh!

Bella: (whispering) I said he was a bad driver.

Jessica: I, like, thought you, like, said...never mind. Anyway, do you, like, like him?

Bella: Mmm hmm.

Jessica: Like, how much?

Bella: More than he likes me (sigh). Though I'm really glad there's no way he can hear our conversation...oops.

AT LUNCH

Edward: You think I don't like you as much as you like me?

Bella: Were you listening to my private conversation?

Edward: What do you think?

Bella: Um...yes?

Edward: Good job. But...why do you think you care more for my than I do for you?

Bella: Well, you don't even like yourself!

Edward: But...I'm an evil monster that drinks blood!

Bella: So? You gotta love yourself or people won't love you either.

Edward: I don't think you've grasped the concept of my blood-drinking here.

Bella: Of course I don't, I've never seen you hunt. You could show me...

Edward: NO WAY!!

Bella: Yikes! I only asked! Maybe you should go to anger management classes…

Edward: I DO NOT NEED ANGER MANAGEMENT CLASSES!

Bella: Sure you don't…

A/N: Love it? Hate it? Let me know! You all want some virtual cookies – review!