"Lily." Ciel tried to reason with me but I wouldn't listen.
"No Ciel, I'm gonna do it."
"You're gonna break something."
"And if I do I'll heal it."
"With what? The powers you don't have?"
"The powers that I can practice with."
"That will also break something."
"I won't break something, I'll be fine."
He sighed and ignored me, I was currently trying to break a tree with my demon strength, it doesn't matter if I'm in the human world now or not, I can't just stop training, I'm the princess of hell and that means I have to be stronger than any demon, and since I could still be beat by an adult human probably I need I can't allow that and will only have to train harder.
I looked at the tree and tried to focus on just breaking it, any part would be fine, a branch would be perfectly fine with me, it just has to be a good size.
As I decided on a good size branch I could sense Sebastian watching, Damn it, I can't do this with a demon watching, he'll see me fail and judge me unfit like all the others. I tried to push him out and instead quickly ran at it and gave it a good karate chop.
I stood there for a few then quickly pulled back and gripped my hand and began to jump around in pain, "Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, owwwwwwwww."
Ciel chuckled at me as I jumped around, I turned to him and glared as my eyes slightly teared, "I told you not to."
"Well you shut up! I'll get it!" I yelled and wiped the few tears away.
Sebastian then came by, "You're never going to win us demons over if you can't even break a tree, let alone a simple branch."
"I know, I'm never going to win you guys over and prove I can take over hell, but I can't give up, weather it takes a thousand years I give in because it's my right to take over and no one else."
Sebastian looked at the tree and and swiped his hand at it, not even making contact, an it sliced in half, he then gave me a look that felt like all the others and left to do his normal work.
"He doubts me to, they all do, theirs not even a single demon out there with a sliver of hope." I spoke aloud.
Ciel looked at me and for a second I thought he might had given me a look of pity, but it disappeared and I was happy, I don't want his pity or any ones, "Sebastian can help you."
"No, I don't want his help or any ones, I can do this on my own."
"You're not going to get anywhere with out some kind of help."
"I don't care! I can't have help from someone! I need to learn on my own, because if I don't I'll still be weak. Learning on my own is the only way I can get strong."
Ciel sighed, "You're so stubborn, I'm giving you help to be better and you wont take it."
"Because I can't take help from any demon, I need a strong one, and not just one but a bunch so I can learn all fighting styles, Sebastian could pretty much only teach basics compared to what I can really do."
"Then learn the basics, at least by then you can protect yourself." and he walked away to leave me to my own training.
"I don't need his help or any ones!" I yelled at him and turned to another tree and ran at it, ready to break every bone I have.
~0~0~0~
I huffed in pain and let out lengthy breaths as sweat beaded every part of me, my body was now filled with scratches, dirt, bumps, and bruises.
"Mistress it's dinner time." Sebastian said walking slightly outside.
"It's not mistress it's just Lily, I've told you thousands of times to just call me that." I said keeping my back to him, I wasn't going to let him see me
He sighed, "Lily, it's dinner time."
"I'm not hungry." and I looked at the tree in front of me, their wasn't even that big of a difference, only few pieces of bark laid on the ground the tree was slightly scared. I looked over at the tree Sebastian had cut down... it was perfect, a clean cut and nothing pointing out at the bottom, it was completely smooth, you couldn't even get a splinter or anything.
"You need to eat something."
"No I don't, I need to get stronger and train."
"Humans don't get stronger on empty stomachs, they get weaker."
"Good thing I'm not human then, only half."
"Which mean half of you needs food."
"Which means I can wait longer."
He sighed, frustrated at my act, "You won't get stronger on an empty stomach."
"If you can I can." I mumbled.
"I remember going over this before, before you were kidnapped by the reapers."
"I remember to."
"Then you know what I'm about to say."
"Yeah I do."
"I am full demon and you are half demon, you still need to take care of your human side, if you neglect to take care of it it will be swallowed up by your demon side and then your sanity will and ou'll go crazy, your demon side will be the only thing left of you, you'll kill everyone around you and those most close to you, and I'd rather you keep him out of your personal problem."
He paused to let me take in everything he said, I wish he wouldn't have though, I want him to tell me everything I needed to know without any interruptions, not even pauses.
"Ok, so..." I mumbled again, waiting for him to say it, "Just tell me what I know." I wanted him to tell me, "Tell me!" he knew I knew, but I wanted someone to tell me, to say it out loud. I turned around to face him, tears welling up, "Tell me that if I don't do anything that I might kill him! I might hurt him! Since I've lived in hell all they've took care of is my demon side! My human side doesn't matter there, father practically wants it to die!" and the tears began to flow down my cheeks, thousands hit the ground and I couldn't stop them as i turned to face Sebastian, "My body isn't effected at all by human problems, hunger or sickness doesn't show on this body! But I feel the pain and everything! I haven't had human food in so long, I haven't had medicine or medical care or anything a human my age would need but I look fine and healthy. I heal like a normal human, but walking on a supposed to be broken foot or leg hurts. A cut heals in a second, but i can feel the sting and pain. Everything that effects humans disappears, but the pain stays. Just now the scars are fading, if anyone could how my body should look they would be disgusted and pity my looks."
Sebastian stood there, listening, I searched for even a slight reaction but I saw none, of course I didn't though, normal demons like him don't have emotions like sympathy, all the demons care about is me living up to my father, that or disappearing.
"Say something... you can't just stand there with a blank expression, tell me something or anything."
"The only thing I can say is is that you better help your human side, also don't forget that my young master is mine, he is not a free soul, one that you can fall in love with and live with forever like human childish fairy tales, when I find his parents murderer I will kill them and he will have his revenge then I will eat his soul and he will be know more, their is no escaping a contract with a demon. I advise you to get your emotions in check and face reality that your lover is my young master and that he is not free to fall in love with you. My job is to be his butler to the very end until he gets his revenge, after he is gone I will once again be a normal demon, and like all the others I will agree that you are not worthy to be the princess of hell, that any other demon would be better than a half creature like you."
I stared at him, what was I supposed to reply with? How was I supposed to look him, I didn't feel shock, because I knew it was true, I didn't feel angry either, because of the same reason, I didn't feel anything right now, I wasn't sure ow to describe this feeling, was I hoping for a sliver of hope? That their was some chance that he would support me and that he thought I could be a ruler, I shouldv'e known though, he is still a demon from hell, naturally he would have the same thoughts as the others.
I turned back around, "I know." was the only thing I replied with, I know he can't be mine, that I can't stop him from taking what rightfully is his, if only he had never brought me here I wouldv'e never none this stuff and what I am, maybe the reapers would have picked up when I was still on the streets, nothing holding me back then, or maybe an angel could kill me, all of that would have been nice.
"Fine, I'll forget them, demons don't really have emotions like love half the time anyway, I should prove to you all that I'm more demon then human anyway, that's a good way to win you guys over, not letting human emotions control me."
Sebastian smiled, "Good, maybe then you can win us all over." he then turned to the door and started to walk, I followed knowing I'd have to eat something.
~0~0~0~
I ignored Ciel the rest of the day and by mourning I was still ignoring him, I wasn't going to allow these emotions to control me, he was Sebastian's after all, I could never have him,, I kept ignoring him for about 3 more days, we would make small chat but nothing ever serious, after a week went by I hardly spoke to him, just a slight 'Hello' and that was truly it. Sometimes he would try and talk to me but it never worked in his favor, I didn't allow it, I was wondering if I should go back home, I mean, I wasn't doing anything here that I wouldn't in Hell, I trained, ate, and slept, sometimes I'd read, yes I learned to read, but other than that nothing. Ciel stopped suggesting me to go out with him when 3 more days passed, time was going on fast and I was slowly getting stronger and my feelings began to disappear. On the last day of the second week someone came over, I don't know if it was a curse or a blessing and I can't explain how I feel about her, but she helped, having another female demon who understood love defiantly helped.
I heard a knock at the door and stopped in my tracks outside to see who it was, as Sebastian opened the door we could both already sense she wasn't human, I decided to stick my nose in and walked over and stood behind Sebastian.
"Hello miss," Sebastian said, plastering a fake smile on his face, "Is their something you need?"
"Yes actually, princess, your father has sent me here to-"
"I'm not going home so leave." I interrupted.
"No, he has not sent me her to retrieve you, whether to help you train."
"What?"
"You have been busy with training so of course your senses have slacked a bit on noticing demons, but since you've still been keeping up with your training and not slacking, your father has decided to let you stay here till necessary, if you can beat your father in a match of which ever your choosing in a year or less, you may make your own desicions and marry whoever, but if he beats you you must come back to hell and marry Abeh with out fight. Do you accept?" the strange women asked, pointing out her hand for a shake, she had nice long hair that was a deep purple and wore a lighter purple dress.
"Yes, I accept." I took her hand and shook it.
"Well then, I am here to train you to fight your father, my name is Carin,."