Bee: Really firetruck with a fuding red engine?
La: Yeah...well she does have a younger brother.
Dee: She threw TAMPONS AT HIM! He obviously isn't that young...
Legolas: STOP! I don't care! Aragorn with no pants is coming up!
Bee: And don't forget no shirt! *squeals in delight*
*All crowd around screen peering forward in excitement*
La: Let the show begin!
Disclaimer: You know the drill
Bethany landed with a loud THUD at the end of a bed. Very disorientated as to how she got there Bethany quickly lost her footing sliding onto the floor in a heap. Her hair was a giant tangled mess and she had difficulty looking at her surroundings with a massive jungle obscuring her vision.
A pale face suddenly appeared in front of hers his face crinkled (I love that word)with concern. The man had long beautiful blonde hair that flowed over his slender shoulders and a face that seemed to have been sculpeted by angels, his amazingly clear blue eyes locked onto to hers, his soft, pink lips turned into a gentle smile.
Bethany's face quickly heated up her whole face going red.
'Hi...' she whispered feebly. The blonde however continued to smile sweetly at her, helping her to her feet...thats when she realised he was naked.
There in all his glory was a naked man, a very attractive naked man...with a nicely sized...wait...A NAKED MAN!
Going into shock Bethany steped backwards her face drained from all the blood that had seeped upwards with embarresement.
'YOUR NAKED!' it wasn't the most charming thing to say to a complete stranger but Bethnay was to shocked to comprehend such notions.
'Its ok My lady.' Came a warm, raspy voice. Turning her head slightly she saw that the blonde had a companion who was standing next to the crimson bedding. He had medium brown shaggy hair and a muscly, toned figure that was slightly tanned. He just exuded manliness and Bethany was faced yet again with a outrageously attractive man...with no clothes to speak of.
'YOUR NAKED TOO!' she shrieked stepping backwards. The blonde tried to approach her from the side, offering comfort.
'Calm down my lady.' He shooved and began to sing oh so beautifully in another language. Hypnotised Bethany watched him step forward his hands up in a gesture that reminded her of the time when she had stepped on the tail of her cat and her brother had tried to calm it down.
The blonde man reached Bethany smiling softly at her he raised his hand higher to place it on her shoulder when...
'YOUR NAKED!'
Rolling his eyes at Bethanys recoil from his lover the brunette stepped forward to try and help gain some control over the silly child. Screaming in terror as Bethany backed herself up into a corner, she hugged herself, tears streaming down her face.
A heavy wooden door burst open with four other figures rushing inwards searching for the person that screamed. As the blonde turned his head to the side to establish who his new compainions were Bethany noticed his ear.
His ear was small, dainty and the same heavenly shade of his sweaty chest, but what had caught her attention was the deft and precise point at the end of his ear. Meaning he was an elf...but wait...his chest was sweaty...glancing at the brunette she realised what she had interrupted.
'YOUR AN ELF! AND YOU WERE HAVING SEX?' she cried almost in disbelief.
The blonde turned to face her his eyebrows raised.
'Yes,' he relpied curtly 'When you put it so bluntly.'
His companion cuckled in amusement. 'I think she is overwhelmed by the entire situation Legolas.'
'You think!'
Bethany then went into to shock again if that was Legolas...then the brunette must be Aragorn...which means...her nose scrunching in concentration she tried to add the two together her shocked mind slow to comprehend.
'AHAHAHAHAHAHHA!' Bethany cried in victory, causing the now crowed room to look at her as though she had lost all sanity.
'I'm dreaming!' She cried in relief 'I knew I shouldn't have read that story about you guys and the honey before I went to sleep. I'm probably so tired from school that I fell asleep and am now dreaming the rest of the story safetly in my bed back at home.'
Smiling triumpetly she stepped forward in order to survey the other vistors to the room. Everyone was staring at her in astonishment, although a devish grin adorned Aragorns face who had promptly decided to buy some honey later on.
The four people to her dismay were all naked.
This is quite a disorientating dream. Perhaps the nakedness represents that I am exposed or must expose myself to my best friends well that does make sense that I don't trust her completely but thats only because she keeps stealing my boyfriends. Ahhh...thats why there exposed because she has to expose herself to me so I can expose myself to her...two way street sister!
Snapping out of her thoughts Bethany surveyed those around her. Two of the men were identical with long black hair and slender bodies that were caught between Aragorns muscukar tone and Legolas's skin tone. Their extremely cute she mused deciding the two must be Elladen and Elrohir. The woman beside them with long black hair bore such a resemblance to Elladan and Elrohir that Bethnay decided she must be Arwen, that and she was amazingly beautiful. The man beside her however she had no idea who he was. He looked very normal compared to everyone else with strong square jaw and a well muscled body, but lacking the grace of those beside him Bethany decided he must be a human.
'I recognise Elladan, Elrohir and Arwen, but who may I ask are you sir?'
'I my lady am Edward Cullen.'
Staring for a moment Bethany went paler, if that was possible.
'The shiny Edward Cullen?'
'Cullean.' He pronounced raising an eyebrow at her description.
Breathing a sigh of relief Bethany smiled, happy to know there were no sparkling vampires in this dream...because well THEY SPARKLE for fudging sake!
Cocking his head to the side Elladan/Elrohir asked 'How do you know of us fair maidan?'
Grinning broadly Bethany remembered she was in a dream and dismissed the gnawing confusion in her stomach, dreams were werid things like this happened all the time. Wait...a dream was werid. Dreams weren't considered werid...not until you woke up.
Elohir/Elladan winched as Bethany slapped herself and then looked down at her hand in shock, she could still feel the sting of her slap and she hadn't woken up yet. Conituinging to slap herself she was stopped by Elrohor/elladan who gently took her hand whispering that it wasn't a dream.
Sinking to the floor Bethany began to cry, alarmed at the sudden change Elrohir/Elladan pulled her close to him and allowed her to cry into his chest. After a while her sobbing quieted as Elrohir/Elladan stroked her hair singing softly. Looking down she realised she was still in her pj's a lovely bright pink silk nightie. Blushing she glanced around sighing in relief that everyone had put on a robe for the sake of modesty...*cough* her sanity.
'I'm sss...oorrry...'she stuttered' its just Edward Cullen and everyone confused me and then you were all naked.'
Realisation dawned on her face and she looked up at one of the twins in intrigue and shock. Quickly understanding her presumption he shook his head, blushing red muttering something about freedom and too hot.
Glad to have cleared that up she hugged the twin holding her, who squeezed her gently back. Standing up she glanced up at him.
'Thank you for your kindness Elladan.'
'Elrohir.' He corrected quickly smiling knowingly.
'Elrohor' she repeated smiling apologetically, 'May I ask does anyone know why and how I got here?'
Just at that very moment two more figures appeared at the door. A man with white hair and aged skin exclaiming 'I do!', as he clutched a tall dark haired elf to him.
In shock Bethany fainted, this time not out of amazement of being transported to middle earth, but because she had not only gathered that Gandalf and Elrond were lovers, but that Gandalf was naked...his old, saggy balls there for everyone to see!