TITLE: DAMN IT, GIBBS!

Rating: 16

Song: Chapter 2~ "Somewhere I belong." Linkin Park

Author's note: One of many of my post-Hiatus Gabby fics. Deal. There's a banner in my profile. Two-part song-fic. Complete

Spoilers: Hiatus. Don't think that should be a warning, cos if you are that behind on eps, perhaps you should leave and get a little youtube action till you're caught up.

Chapter Two: Somewhere I belong

I will never know myself until I do this on my own
And I will never feel anything else, until my wounds are healed
I will never be anything till I break away from me
I will break away, I'll find myself today

Gibbs walked back into his kitchen and kicked over his suitcase. He didn't know if he could leave as easily as he told Abby he would. And he wanted to know what was going on with her too. A lot had changed since he left.

When this began
I had nothing to say
And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me

"Abs."
"Don't go."
"What?"
"You heard me. I need you here."
"No you don't. Your first instinct pushed me away. So I'm going."
"Stop being a stubborn ass. You don't understand."
"What?"
"I can't tell you."
"Abs?"
"I can't. I need to know you wanted to stay here. And I don't want to be the one that can force you back to Mexico, or keep you here cos you feel you have to."
"You're not making any sense, Abs."
"Are you going to stay this time? For me?"
"Do you want me to?"
"I do." She said simply then started laughing. "Not your two favorite words, I know."
"It's okay from you."

I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I've held so long
Erase all the pain till it's gone
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm close to something real
I wanna find something I've wanted all along
Somewhere I belong

"You've convinced me to stay." Gibbs finally said.
"Matilyn is your daughter." Abby said, dropping the ball in a single statement that Gibbs did not expect.
"What?"
"Yep."
"Why did you tell me she wasn't mine?" He asked, angrily.
"I told you, I didn't want you to stay because you thought you had to. Felt obligated to stay because you got me pregnant and are too much of a gentlemen to dump me after that." She explained, and that's when he noticed the picture on the wall behind her. It was Abby and Tony, obviously about a month before Matilyn was born.
"You should have told me."
"And you should have stayed. But things changed." Abby said.
"So, what are we going to do?" He asked sitting down at her table. As he did, Matilyn started crying from her room.
"I am going to be right back." Abby left the room and then returned with Maty, her head on her mother's shoulder, still obviously waking up. She was in a dark green jump-suit, one which Gibbs would have to ask the origin. "Well, what do you think?"
"What?"
"She's pretty cute, huh?"
"She's beautiful." He said smiling at the little girl. Her eyes opened fully and she stared at Gibbs for a second before burying her head again in her mother's neck.
"So, why did you decide to stay?" Abby asked, automatically going for the cupboard and grabbing the formula container. Without assistance, she was able to prepare a bottle for Matilyn while balancing the cherub in her arms. He knew that was partly his fault.
"I honestly can't remember anymore." He said sadly. "May I?"
"Yes." Abby said gently putting Maty in Gibbs' experienced hands.
"God, she's just perfect." He almost whispered, kissing the chubby cheek. Abby wanted to cry at this display of affection, at the first meeting of father and daughter.
"Yes, she is. I'm sorry, I didn't tell you about her."
"You're right. It's my fault and I shouldn't have left." Gibbs said slowly, looking up at Abby.
"If I would have told you…"
"No, I should have stayed. I missed more than this." He said referring to the baby in his arms.
"So, we were both in the wrong. We were both hurting and pissed off. What are we going to do now?" She asked sitting in the chair next to his.

I was confused
And I let it all out to find
That I'm not the only person with these things in mind
Inside of me
But all the vacancy the words revealed
Is the only real thing that I've got left to feel

"Why do you think Gibbs is back, this time?" Ziva asked as she and Tony sat in her apartment that night. Ever since Gibbs had… retired', she and Tony would get together for piano lessons at least once a week, followed by dinner or drinks.
"Don't know."
"Yes, you do." She said watching his face.
"Abby. She's probably told him Maty's his by now."
"Abby told me she told him she wasn't his."
"Why would she do that?"
"You wouldn't understand." Ziva said dismissively.

"What is it?" Abby asked when Gibbs went completely silent.
"Matilyn has the same eyes as…" He paused.
"As you." She pointed out. He shook his head but didn't speak. "And Kelly."
"How did you know that?"
"Jenny. We got a lot closer after you left. Then when Maty was born, she showed me the photo of Kelly."
"And that didn't bother you?"
"Why would it?"
"I don't know. Guess, I'm still getting used to the idea of being a father again."
"You feel you need to stay now." Abby said sadly. "This is not what I wanted."
"Abby, I was going to stay before I knew she was mine. Now I'm even happier to stay." He said kissing her temple and the same place on the baby. With his free hand, he caressed Abby's cheek in the sign for 'my girl', before slowly approaching to kiss her lips. He paused, giving her an out. To his surprise, she closed the distance he left, kissing him softly. The baby started whinging between them.
"Sorry, petal." Abby said laughing at the little girl's reaction. She looked at Gibbs then they both looked back at the baby, and started smothering her with kisses. Maty, being so ticklish, started giggling contagiously.

Somewhere I belong