The night passed by slowly and Reid didn't get much sleep. He could almost laugh at himself for worrying so much.

He wondered if Morgan had slept better than him… Of course he had. Derek Morgan wasn't afraid of anything, well obviously something, he was human after all, but not even close to Reid's fears. Or was it just one true fear that covered them all? The fear of being alone…

He knew very well it wasn't healthy to think those thoughts at all, especially not before work, but it was a part of his persona, it was what made him Spencer Reid.

At that moment he didn't like being Spencer Reid.

He got up and walked down the hall to the bathroom, where he turned on the shower and got undressed.

He looked at himself in the mirror for a while. He had changed alot, probably because of all he had been through. He wasn't young anymore, at least not mentally. Sure, he had been extremely intelligent all his life, but he had never faced the dangers of the outside world until he joined the FBI, and the knowledge of what people excisted out there, the minds, the weapons, the fantasies… It made him older. Torn.

He stepped into the shower and let the hot water soften his tense muscles. He washed his long hair and scrubbed his skin. Then, he stepped out of the shower, wrapped a towel around his waist and wiped away the condensation from the mirror with his hand. He shaved slowly with the sharp razor knife before getting dressed.

It was a normal morning, but he had a tight knot in his stomach that wouldn't go away.

If you just tell Derek how you feel about it he will understand, he thought and calmed himself down a little bit. A deep sigh escaped his lungs and he quickly downed his mug of coffee.

He drove in silence, except for the soft tunes of Beethoven from the car radio. The street lights were still lit, it was only 7 am.

Somehow, Reid found the dimmed, red lights calming, almost romantic, and he felt relaxed for once.

So far, just like any normal day.

The elevator was, however, exeptionally slow and it didn't help his nerves at all. He felt slightly claustrophobic, but took a few deep breaths and tried to think of something else… Morgan for example.

"Hey, pretty boy, we're done for today" Morgan said and knocked Reid on the shoulder lightly. The young genius snapped out of his thoughts and looked up.

"Yeah, yeah… I was just thinking" Reid said and moved his hair behind his ear with his slim fingers. "What's with that anyway?"

"With what?" Morgan asked and threw his jacket over his shoulder.

"Calling me that… Pretty boy?" Reid asked with a frowned proving he was deep in thoughts again.

"'Cause you are" Morgan said with a shrug. Reid blinked a few times.

"W-what?" he asked quietly and looked around to see if anyone had heard that.

"I'm just saying. You're kinda cute, everybody knows that"

Morgan was smiling and Reid had to swallow hard. Was he dreaming? Did Derek Morgan just say that to him.

"Is this some kind of a joke?" he asked. Morgan looked at him for a moment, then leaned in and gave Reid a soft kiss on the lips.

Reid was in shock and did nothing but stare at him.

"Now you've got the night to figure out if that was a joke" Morgan said, and then he left.

Reid just sat there. He could still feel Morgan's lips on his. It took him a minute or so before the shock had sunk in, and after that he couldn't help but grin like a complete fool.

That was over a year ago, but Reid loved him more than ever and he knew Morgan felt the same about him, wich was of course the reason to why he wanted to tell the others but…

Reid sighed and the elevator doors finally slid open. He walked quickly down the hall and entered the bullpen, left his jacket and bag at his desk and headed for the lunch room to get another mug of coffee.

As soon as he had entered the room, Morgan approached him with a large, pale blue mug. Prentiss, JJ and Rossi greeted him and he accepted the coffee from Morgan.

"You smell good" Morgan said quietly to him and Reid swallowed in mild panic. The others were just a few feet away.

"Thank you" he said and looked at Morgan, hoping the others would think he was thanking him for the coffee.

"Are you okay, Reid? You look a little tense?" Prentiss asked and Reid cleared his throat, as he gave her a fake smile.
"I'm fine, I just didn't sleep too well…Got some birds outide my bedroom window that keeps me awake. Pidgeons, actually… You know all the noise they make, it can drive you insane"

He drank almost half the large cup of coffee in one sip and the others stared at him. It was obvious something wasn't quite right, but they weren't going to stress it.

"Well, maybe you should get in touch with your landlord… Get rid of them" JJ suggested with a smile. Reid nodded.

The sound of heels clicking against the lenoleum floor approached them, and within seconds Penelope Garcia had entered the room, bright and happy as always.

"Good morning, sweeties, look who's bringing the goodies today" she greeted and placed a large white box on the table. Morgan was first to take a peek inside, as always when it came to Garcia's baking.

"Oh, mama those are fine looking cupcakes" he said and picked one up. It was chocolate with pink frosting and silver sprinkles. Typical Garcia. She could brighten up any day.

They sat down and chatted for a while, eating the cupcakes and finishing their coffe, and for a moment Reid forgot all about his worries. He was among friends and it meant a great deal to him.

"So" Garcia said as they all waited for orders. "Chief Inspector honey bun, do we have a case?"

Morgan chuckled a little.

"As far as I know, no" he said and looked over at JJ who slowly shook her head.

"Nope, not right now. I'm still going through some files, trying to prioritize at the moment" JJ said.

"Wich means paperwork" Prentiss sighed. Rossi remained quiet, listening.

Morgan nodded.
"Yeah. Hotch is in a meeting with Strauus at the moment, he'll be back whenever they're finished" he said and looked over at Reid. "Could we talk in my office?"

Reid looked around at the others, but the question was definatly meant for him.

"Sure"

The others studied them with suspicion.

"Everything okay?" JJ asked and her eyes flickered between Reid and Morgan.

"Yeah, it's nothing. We just need to talk in private" Morgan explained and gave Reid a look before he left the room.

Reid chewed on his lip nervously and followed Morgan to his office.