Once again, thanks to Mockingeagle for letting me use the chat-rule-thing format!
KJ- Kathryn Janeway
C: Chakotay
BT: B'Elanna Torres
TP: Tom Paris
T: Tuvok
HK: Harry Kim
N: Neelix
K: Kes
EMH: Emergency Medical Hologram
V: Vorik
KJ1: Whoever deleted coffee from the replicators, PUT IT BACK.
BT12: If you work in Engineering and you deleted coffee, you're dealing with the next core breach.
TP- Wow. You girls really like your coffee, huh?
BT- If you worked in Engineering you'd need it too.
N- What about my coffee?
BT- That's not coffee, Neelix.
EMH13: Do not deactivate my program while I am in the middle of a medical procedure. It could be dangerous for the patient.
K- Who did that?
EMH- I think it was the person I was performing the procedure on.
T14: Please do not hold rock concerts in the mess hall. We have Rec. Rooms for events of that nature.
TP- There was a rock concert? When? Why wasn't I invited?
BT- You were asleep. It was last night, right after my shift. It was pretty fun.
HK- I wasn't to thrilled with it.
TP- Why not?
HK- Have you ever been on the wrong end of a Klingon mosh pit?
BT- :P
HK15: When we have rock concerts please keep the moshing at a reasonable level.
BT- That was reasonable!
KJ16: The Borg don't care about the magic of friendship.
EMH- Who do I have to un-assimilate?
KJ- No one, I stopped that idiot before he could hurt himself.
KJ17: Q is not allowed on this ship.
Q- Aww.
KJ: Q may not change things on this ship.
Q- Drat!
KJ: Q's sphere of influence STOPS at Voyager's shields.
Q- ARE YOU #%$&ING KIDDING ME?!
KJ- You don't get a say in this.
T18: The next time Q appears on the ship all crewmen are to assist in his capture.
Q- You really think that would stop me?
KJ- Well, we can hope.
C19: The Q/Captain Janeway 'fanfiction' is unappreciated and, frankly, mentally scarring. Please remove it from the computers.
KJ- WHAT.
C- Apparently people actually wrote that stuff.
KJ- Why?!
C- If I knew, I'd get Tuvok to logic them out of it.
T- I have found it hard to reason humans out of ideas they think are good.
HK20: No poking.
BT- Um. Okay.
HK- It's not worth explaining.
T21: The walls do not need murals.
KJ- That actually might be a good idea. We'll be looking at these walls for a long time, and plain grey might get boring after a few years.
KJ22: Any crewmen with artistic talent interested in a shipwide mural project, please contact Neelix.
N- Me?
KJ- You're the moral officer. This seems like a job for you.
BT23: Antimatter generators are NOT for decorative purposes.
KJ- Seriously, who needs to be demoted this time?
BT- I think they get the message. Being half-Klingon has its advantages sometimes.
EMH- I hope you didn't hurt them too badly.
BT- They should be in Sickbay soon.
EMH24: Only my programming prevents me from letting stupidity-incurred wounds scar instead of using the dermal regenerator.
T25: I am not an android.
BT26: Don't call the Kazon rockheads. They don't appreciate it.
KJ- You want this ship destroyed, huh?
BT- I did apologize.
KJ- Yes, at gunpoint.
BT27: Don't call a Viidian scarface. Again, not appreciated.
KJ- Do we need a special non-insult rule for you?
BT- Probably.
BT28: Don't call the Borg blockheads, cyborgs, one-minders, termites, or squares. The insults are wasted anyways.
N - Am I the only one on this ship with a shred of diplomatic intuition?
KJ- B'Elanna's incidents didn't take 'diplomatic intuition' to prevent.
KJ29: Lt. Torres may not insult alien species. If she cannot keep insults out of her interactions with them, she is not to interact with them at all.
BT- Sorry.
KJ- Just try to keep a civil tongue in your head.
C30: Don't switch departments in the middle of your shift. Chances are, you don't have the right training, and you might end up causing problems in the department that isn't yours.
KJ- Why is my crew so dumb?
C- I don't know.
C31: An inter-department exchange program is a bad idea. Think about how impatient B'Elanna is with trained engineers and you'll understand.
BT32: No non-Engineers other than commanding officers or people on official buisness may be in Engineering.
C33: Basically, stay in your own department.
KJ34: Will someone please investigate the purring sound from Cargo Bay 1, instead of saying Deck 4 is haunted and avoiding it like the plague?
T35: Avoiding Deck 4 will severely hinder your ability to move about the ship.
HK36: Don't steal my clarinet. I know the ship isn't soundproof, but I'm not that bad at music!
N37: Don't steal my cooking utensils!
T38: Do not steal any personal property of others in the crew.
KJ39: Just stop. It doesn't matter what it is, if you're on duty and what you're doing isn't your job just stop.
EMH40: The creature found in Cargo Bay 1 will be brought to Sickbay within the next five minutes, or I will reinstate the bi-monthly instead of quarterly physical examinations!
BT- The ensigns have it!
A/N: Another chapter! I have about four going simultaneously... so, review if you want another! I"m seriously holding them hostage for reviews! :) but not seriously. Still, please review. Aaand I'm rambling so i'll stop now.