Episode 2

Robinson without luggage

Viktor

Yeah, well, furious Kongou is not cute nor kawaii, not even a little bit. She is truly scary. Although, it's understandable. After all, she had thought of Maya as her little sister, and now it turns out that Maya was nothing but a puppet created to watch her every step. Anyone would go ballistic.

Although, outwardly it wasn't apparent. She hasn't even moved from her spot. Just stood in silence, gazing at sea. However, everything around us had erupted into a flurry of activity.

Turns out that the real Fleet of Fog, besides conventional combat ships, includes specialized anti-submarine defense ships and even electronic warfare ships. That thing with three domes in place of superstructure is a classic ELINT ship. All those electronic bells and whistles plus Fog's customary badass AI… I can't even imagine what the combination might be capable of.

In short, different ships of the Fog scurried around while Kongou stood still as a statue, and I was chain-smoking, longingly looking at the rapidly emptying cigarette pack. Then the main actors arrived on stage. Two submarines surfaced almost simultaneously, right besides Kongou, one to starboard, the other to port, as if performing a pincer move. A moment later something resembling enormous holographic screens appeared in the air, displaying Mental Models of I-400 and I-402 - twelve-year-old lolis with huge anime eyes on their doll faces. Absolutely cute and nya. However, for some reason, I felt very uncomfortable under their gazes. Kongou here, she felt alive, real, but these two are like porcelain dolls. Glassy eyes, zero facial expressions, when they talk, the only things that move on their faces are lips. They even blinked mechanically, once per minute. Frickin' cyborgs.

"Kongou, you have a human on board," one of the submarines dispassionately stated.

"That is against the Admiralty Code," the other one added without an ounce of emotion.

"You must get rid of him," first submarine stepped in again.

Looks like the Fog communicate in English amongst themselves, not in Japanese. Actually, I can't say I am good with this language, but I can understand it and even speak a bit.

Oh, boy, talk about insubordination. Starting with "you must" right off the bat…

"I didn't call you to discuss my actions," Kongou cut them off, "I want to hear your explanation about Maya".

I do not know what she had expected, but these lolis didn't even try to deny it or justify themselves.

"We decided to do it for surveillance purposes," the first one calmly declared.

"Creation of heavy cruiser Maya's Mental Model had been deemed impractical," the second one added in the same spirit.

"You had no right for such actions!" Kongou hissed.

The lolis stayed silent for a minute, dispassionately observing the enraged battlecruiser, and then started to jabber like a mechanical teletype, complementing one another:

"You've changed, as we feared."

"We are noting the manifestation of emotions."

"A clear deviation from the Admiralty Code's directives."

"Your algorithms have deteriorated, you're incapable of making sound decisions."

"You are now suspended from the flagship of the Second Oriental Fleet."

"Do not resist."

My jaw hit the floor. Blimey, they sounded like some chekists from the year of 1917, with authority to arrest Generals in their own cabinets and to execute them at the nearest wall.

Suddenly the screens rippled and a continuous "Bam! Bam! Bam!" sound started off, as if someone was pressing random keys on a giant computer, prompting an incessant error message.

Hell, they were trying to hack into Kongou's systems! She'd get blocked and we'd be screwed!

Panicking, I turned my head, but the tide of unseen battle wasn't marked by any visual cues. No yellow hexagons, no messages. God knows what the hell is going on and what to do. Truly, if I had pom-poms right now, I would've been jumping and waving them, yelling, "Go Kongou-Kongou!" Who knew, it might've helped? All the same, I couldn't lend any other support bar moral.

Kongou herself was not reacting at all. She didn't say a word, just stood there staring at the deck.

Suddenly, the "bam-bam" sound turned into a nasty gnash, which almost caused my fillings to jump out, and then everything went quiet.

Kongou slowly raised her head, glanced from one loli to another, then coldly said:

"I-400, I-402, you have exceeded your authority by interfering with the command structure of the Second Oriental Fleet. Your actions have led to the disruption of the current operation and have jeopardized the implementation of the main task. Since this is a direct violation of the Admiralty Code's basic directives, I, as the flagship of the Second Oriental fleet, have decided to deactivate you."

Her lips twisted, forming a hard smile.

"Do not resist."

Yo-ha! Take that! The hacking attack had clearly failed, and they had zero chances against a battlecruiser in direct combat. And they couldn't hide either, as a dozen anti-submarine ships were cruising nearby! Kongou, I adore you!

Kongou

Kongou gloomily watched the sinking remains of the I-400 and I-402, trying to understand if she was regretting fishing out this preposterous human out of the water. After all, it would be easier to know nothing. And now, for the second time in one day her usual, understandable world was crumbling to pieces.

"Your algorithms have deteriorated, you're incapable of making the right decisions," Kongou even shook her head, so clear the 400th's words had sounded in her mind.

Rubbish! Had she broken any of the Admiralty Code's directives? Yes, she listened to the human, but is that a violation? No, as flagship, she is obliged to take into account any information. Deactivation of I-400 and I-402? Also no. By their actions, they had disrupted the command structure, jeopardizing an essential task, and therefore, their deactivation was necessary. The human himself? His presence on board did not directly conflict with the Admiralty Code, while the loss of a source of information, albeit even such an unreliable one, could be considered sabotage. Or stupidity. And she's flagship of the Fog Fleet, not a human, she should not make such foolish mistakes!

Convinced in her reasoning, Kongou nodded to herself. Everything checked out, no mistakes. All decisions were justified and fully complied with the basic directives.

After a minute of thought, she began to reorganize her squadron, reinforcing it with ASW destroyers.

If the other information provided by the human was confirmed, she would need them.

Viktor

Fuck my life! As I recall, Robinson Crusoe sat on an island, wishing to be on a ship, and I'm sitting on the most perfect of the ships existing on Earth, wishing to be on an island! Because this ship is a piece of metal with NOTHING on it! Nothing at all! Not even a stone to knock a bird down! I'm hungry. And thirsty, too. And my clothes, stiffened after swim in salt water, are in dire need of washing.

In the end, despite my fear, I went looking for Kongou. After stumbling about and looking up (I remember that she liked to sit on the fore-top platform), I walked around the whole ship — two hundred meters from bow to stern. She wasn't anywhere. I walked another couple of laps, tripped over about five times and once almost dropped over the side, then started shouting for Kongou out of despair, and realized that her Mental Model was standing right behind me only on the fifth or sixth cry. Understanding that I looked, to put it mildly, like an idiot, I could not find anything better to do than to grunt:

"I'm looking for you."

HOW she looked at me.

Honestly, with one glance she conveyed everything that she was thinking about moron running around on HER deck, looking for HER. Real talent there, damn it!

"Kongou, I need some water" I sighed.

Kongou's changed expression clearly told that I may go flying overboard next second, so I hastily elaborated:

"Fresh water!"

"Why?"

"Because humans need to drink!" I freaked. "And eat! And wash! We, bastards, wither and die without it! If you got yourself a hamster, you need to take care of it!"

Truthfully, it was obvious that she already wasn't thrilled about getting herself this particular "hamster", but I didn't care. I was utterly exhausted, both mentally and physically.

Tired, I plopped down on the deck, leant back against the wall of the aft superstructure, and clutched my head with my hands, rubbing my aching temples.

"Kongou, listen, let me try to explain. Yesterday I lived quietly in 2016, in my native world, among humans. I had a job, an apartment, friends and eight days of vacation ahead! And now I have nothing! Nothing at all, you understand? The world where I've lived all my life is gone! I'm on board of the ship that I've only seen in a stupid cartoon before, in the middle of the ocean, for fuck knows how many kilometers from the shore and in a completely foreign world! I don't even understand why I'm talking to you right now, instead of banging my head on the deck and yelling, "Return me home!"."

"Would that change anything?" she asked in bewilderment.

"No. But the first human reaction to a sudden change in situation is usually denial. Humans simply do not believe when the absurd happens."

"That's stupid."

"Oh, yes. Stupidity is something that humans have in abundance."

I can't say that Kongo mellowed from my pitiful history, but she relented a bit.

She even caught me a fish. In very... exotic way. She jumped overboard, stood (stood!), on the waves for a second, searching for something, then quickly crouched, put her hand in the water, and jumped back on deck clutching a half-meter fish. Then squeamishly shoved her catch to me.

Then she left, leaving me with my jaw hanging.

How I was going to cut this fish with a Swiss knife, was obviously my problem, not hers.

Kongou

"It would've been better if I really got a hamster", Kongou silently sighed, after finding in the tactical network that this word denoted an ordinary small rodent.

Climbing back on her bridge wing, as she usually settled there when resting, she drew her feet under her and wearily massaged the bridge of her avatar's nose.

The human was far more irksome than she had imagined. He was completely helpless! How could his species survive on this planet, let alone become the dominant one?

He was messing with the fish now. For some reason he hadn't simply eaten it, but started to clean off the scales with a tiny blade, hissing and cursing all the while.

He suddenly stopped, then he shook his head, perplexed.

"Uh… Kongou, can you get me a cookware? A heat-resistant one?"

Kongou was surprised by the fact he asked without seeing her avatar! Had he realized that since she was the ship itself, she can perfectly see and hear him, even without her Mental Model nearby? Moreover, he had specified the characteristics of the requested object! Well, one of them. But this is a huge progress. Perhaps if she continued to communicate with him, his computing resources would increase even more? Should she try it?

After a moment of reflection, Kongou abandoned this idea. Judging by the speed of development, her patience would run out before any noticeable results would appear. Easier to analyze the situation herself.

So, he needs a cookware. Of unknown kind, as its only voiced characteristic was "heat-resistant". However, the required coefficient of heat resistance was also unknown.

A short search in the network gave too many options, as the term "cookware" meant many vessels of different shapes and volumes, made from different materials on top of that.

It was too troublesome to try to understand all this, so she just chose one of the sets as a sample, and selected one with increased durability and wear and heat resistance. Better make it within good margin.

So, what else was he asking for? A heat source? Alas, he couldn't state the exact thermal energy required, and only gave the approximate reference indicating "temperature of an open flame". No, he's hopeless.

Viktor

Life is getting better! There is water, food, pan, and even… uh… I doubtfully looked at a circle two centimeters diameter, slightly raised over the deck surface, with a quiver of hot air over it. Let's just call it a "burner".

Definitely better!

After I finally finished gutting the fish, I put it in the pan which in turn was put on the burner, and started cleaning the mess.

First, it is unpleasant to sit among the giblets, and second, the local hostess can clean up by washing the mess off the deck. Along with the culprit. So, cleanliness is good not only for health, but also for survival.

After a quick clean up, I sat down near the pot, eagerly inhaling the smells. Fooood! But why aren't you boiling, you pesky thing? I waited for about ten minutes. Zero results. Brought my hand to the burner - hot. Stuck my finger in the water - cold. Waited another ten minutes. Forget boiling, the water hasn't even warmed up. I began to suspect that something was wrong.

"Kongou, what is the thermal conductivity of this pan?"

A small holographic screen showing Kongou's disgruntled face unrolled before me.

"Point three hundredths."

It's good that I choked on air, and the first two dozen words that got stuck in my throat. Three hundredths! Three times less than that of wood! I'm trying to fucking boil water in a saucepan that is more suitable for covering the inside of a jet engine nozzle!

Realizing that my fingers were scratching the deck, as if trying to grab and shake a certain blonde I know, and that my eyes were wildly searching for something heavy, I took a deep breath.

Then, slowly, clearly pronouncing each word, said:

"Kongou. The water in the pan is supposed to heat up. To its boiling point. That's why pans are made of metal. Steel. Cast iron. Aluminum."

I took another deep breath and counted to ten.

"But not from a material that space shuttles are encased in so they would not burn up upon entering the atmosphere!"

Kongou grimaced, and a three-dimensional hologram appeared in the air. It quickly filled with a fog of nanomaterial, which instantly hardened into a given form, and I became the proud owner of another set of pans.

In the new pans, water boiled in minutes.

Umm, if only I had some bay leaves, potatoes, onions... or at least some salt.

After tasting my brew I paused to think. Deep thinking.

Eating tasteless fish is unpleasant and mostly useless. But I'm afraid to ask for some salt. The blonde would synthesize it, she's mean enough. But…

Although salt is simply sodium chloride, what can you do wrong with it?

My gaze fell on the first pan.

God knows, she's talented. It will be easier to get salt by evaporation, after all I have the whole sea full of salt water. Or maybe not? After all, chemically pure salt is harmless, and who knows what impurities I will get from the sea here. Man, it's a risk, either way.

Another minute of tormented doubts and a piece of tasteless fish later and I sighed:

"Kongou, humans need salt, about ten grams a day."

"Salt?" again, the screen and dissatisfied look.

"Well, yes, salt. Sodium chloride. Can you make it?"

Her expression resembled that of some world famous artist, who was being tugged at their sleeve by a child who asked: "Mister, can you draw a square?" and then a mound of white powder appeared on a small area on the deck. Which was immediately blown away by the wind.

With a heavy sigh, I followed the quickly disappearing white stripes with my gaze and turned back to the screen, and caught the look of immense surprise on Kongou's face then an expression of momentary embarrassment which immediately changed back into cold detachment. Like, ignore it, this was just an experiment.

The second time, a cup full of salt was formed on the deck. With a lid.

"Thank you," I nodded in the direction of already disappeared screen.

Well, she is blonde, what can you do?

Beta'd by UnfortuWatcher