Chapter Two – Change
That night, I didn't sleep. I didn't sleep most nights, all part of this transition we assumed was happening. Other nights though, I felt more human than others. Like tonight for example.
I felt a sharp pain in my stomach. A burning. This feeling had come before, but it had passed relatively quickly. Now? Not so much. I remained silent as invisible tears of pain flowed through my brown eyes. My heart rate was accelerating every second. This was different from previous nights. I felt this was more than just growing pains. When the pain was too much to bare, I sat up, careful to not wake Jacob and went downstairs. I couldn't think of the pain, I had to hide my thoughts from my father, who was sitting on the couch playing with my mothers hair as she was curled up next to him.
"Ness?" Dad asked.
"I'm fine, just a little nauseated.. I'm going to go for a walk, get some air" I choked out.. the burning was only intensifying. I walked slowly outside, trying to keep from screaming in pain. Once outside, I ran for the woods. I fell once I was about a mile or two into the wooded area and let out the slightest wimper. The pain was unbearable, I couldn't see anymore. I closed my eyes and prayed for this nightmare to end. I don't know how long I was out there before someone must have picked up my scent and found me.
"Edward, Carlisle, Bella, she's over here!" I vaguely heard Alice yell.
"Nessie!" someone called. The voices were getting harder and harder to hear. I tried to open my eyes but the pain just intensified with every movement.
"What's happening, Carlisle?" Edward asked
"I don't know.. none of the others described this.." Carlisle said. It frustrated him to not know the answer, to not know how to stop the pain. But then again, they didn't know I was in pain. I hadn't moved, I hadn't made any noise. To them, I probably looked dead.. if I was even alive to begin with.
"I think she's waking up…" someone said. The voices were becoming clearer again. The pain hadn't stopped completely, but it was more a dull throbbing now. I opened my weary eyes and saw 7 bodies peering over me. The first was my mother, her eyes full of concern and worry. Then my father, who looked like he'd been tortured his face was so full of pain. The third was my Jacob, worry splashed over his beautiful face. The fourth was Esme. She looked calm but worried. Alice was next to her, appearing thankful about something. Rosalie was the fifth face I looked upon. She looked terrified. Emmett stood next to her, expressionless. Then, Carlisle. He looked as if he'd aged in a matter of minutes. His true age evident in his eyes. Something I had never noticed before.
"Renesmee, can you hear me darling?" my mother called. I opened my mouth to speak, but words were pointless. I opened my eyes completely and stared at all of them. Confused. Where was I? How much time had passed? What happened to me!?
"You're in the hospital Ness. Some hikers found you in the woods, and so we brought you here. It's only been a few hours, but you were pretty out of it. You haven't moved since we found you. You gave us quite the scare" My dad answered. I nodded, and then reached up to touch his face. He needed to see what happened. In those few moments where my hand touched his cheek, he was paralyzed. It was as if the same burning was coursing through his body as well. Everyone looked from me to him in confusion. Our silent exchange was more than my mother could tolerate.
"What's going on!" she demanded. She never yelled at me or my father, but considering how scared she was, he wouldn't hold it against her.
"The burning… it was like being burned alive from the inside out" my father answered for me.
"It's like being turned into a vampire?" Rosalie recalled, and nobody spoke. We all had the same question. How was I experiencing something none of the others like me had before? How was I becoming a vampire without having being bit. Was that even what was happening? That took three days, and I was only out of it for a few hours. I remained calm though and smiled.
"I'm fine.." I managed to choke out. My voice sounded tired and raspy.
"No, you're not fine. We need to get you home to rest" Jacob suggested, glancing with pleading eyes to Carlisle. Nobody liked the idea of me being in a hospital, especially Carlisle. Our secret would be at stake here.. and that's exposure none of us needed, especially with The Volturi keeping an ever watchful eye on our family. It took a little convincing, but Carlisle was able to break me free of that people prison to treat me at home. I was glad, I could sleep in my own bed and have Jacob there to hold me. He couldn't stop the pain, but he could help me through it if it happened again. After all, there was no point in hiding it anymore.
That night I was relatively pain free. Just a few cramps here and there but I was actually able to get a good nights sleep. Jacob on the other hand, didn't sleep at all. I could feel him watching me as I slept, being cautious not to wake me and trying to remain quiet. I didn't care though, not like I normally would. I slept peacefully through the night and through a good portion of the next day.
It was past noon when I finally woke up. "Jacob?" I called out, still a little groggy.
"I'm right here." Jacob said. I looked around the room and found him cleaning up the clothes and things that were scattered around our room. Our room. Something my father didn't exactly approve of, but Alice had encouraged after finding Jacob and I in compromising positions one to many times.
Jacob was at my side in that same instant. "How are you feeling Ness?" he asked worriedly.
"I don't know yet… better?" I said, questioningly.
"Carlisle will want to know that you're awake" Jacob said. The expression on his face was worrisome. I still didn't know what was wrong with me, and I hoped Carlisle had some answers. Jacob didn't even make it to the door before my mother, father, Carlisle, and Rosalie were in the room
"Renesmee, how are you feeling?" My mother asked, hovering over me.
"A little disoriented but okay" I answered simply.
"Bella, I need you to stand aside so I can look at her" Carlisle said calmly. My mother reluctantly stood to the side so Carlisle could get a closer look at me.
"Well.. you look better. You've got some of your color back" Carlisle said, pleased.
"That's good.. any idea what happened?" I asked.
"No, you looked fine, like you were sleeping. Except, you wouldn't move.. you wouldn't wake up. You gave us quite a fright" he responded.
"I didn't feel fine." I muttered.
"Well, then perhaps you can answer your question better than I could"
"I don't know how to describe it. Dad saw it. It was like being burned.. everything hurt. I tried to move, but I couldn't. I tried to yell but it felt like flames blocked my airway. I've never felt anything like it…" I recalled.. shuddering at the memory, which seemed so prominent to me now.
"Oh Nes.." Jacob whimpered. It tortured him to not be able to help me.
"I'm fine now Jacob.. don't worry about it. I'm sure it was a one time thing" I said, very unconvincingly.
"Well, I want you to rest Ness.. don't over do it until we figure out what triggered it" My father cautioned. I felt he knew more than what he was saying, but I'm sure he wanted to be alone to confer with Carlisle before he told me anything. Honestly, I didn't care. I was content now, and that's what mattered.
The rest of the day passed slowly. It wasn't a bad thing though. I spent the whole day wrapped tightly in Jacob's arms. He held me close to him, almost as if he was afraid to let me go. We didn't say much. Mostly, I slept. I couldn't believe how tired I was. More so than that, I couldn't believe how THIRSTY I was! All of a sudden that was the only thing I could think about. I clutched my throat, which was now dry and burning.
"Ness?"
"We need to hunt.." I choked out. I couldn't believe how thirsty I was. It was absolute torture.
"Right now?" Jacob asked.
"Now!" I almost screamed. My eyes were frantic, almost animalistic. Apparently, others heard me yell and ran upstairs.
"What is it Ness?" my father asked.
"Thirsty… it burns!" I yelled. I was enraged with my thirst. I had to feed, NOW!
"We have some blood stored.. in case of emergency. Carlisle bought some from the hospital" Edward recalled. Alice was upstairs in an instant, cup in hand.
"It's human blood Edward, are you sure this is a good idea?" She asked cautiously.
"It's all we have. She's not in a condition to be hunting."
"Just give it to me!" I snarled. Alice handed it over and I drank quickly. The burning subsiding with every gulp. When I was finished I looked up to horrified eyes.
"Your eyes…" Alice said, backing away in horror.
"What?" I asked nervously.
"They're bright red…" I heard my father say, and then everything went black.
This time, the burning didn't stop. It coursed through every vein in my body, causing me to scream aloud in pain. Why wasn't anyone helping me!? I called for my Jacob, my father, my mother.. and nobody came. Why weren't they helping me? I needed the pain to stop.. it was killing me. I don't how long the burning continued for. Hours? Days? Weeks?
"Look, she's coming too.." Alice said. Her voice was worried.
"Renesmee?" I heard my frantic mother call.
"Give her some space Bella, love. She's going to be very disoriented when she wakes up" my father told her.
The burning was slowly coming to a stop. It left my fingers first, then my arms. My legs were free, then my stomach. My head began to clear, and finally, I opened my eyes. Everything looked so different. I was more alert than before of my surroundings.. and I could hear… well… everything.
"Renesmee?" My father called.. coming up to stand right behind me.
I spun around quickly. Less than a hundredth of a second had passed. I didn't speak, I just stared at him with wondering eyes.
"Everything is okay sweetheart. You just went through a little… change.. is all" My mother coaxed. I felt defensive, almost animalistic.
"She'll need to feed.." Jasper suggested. He was the trained expert with newborns. Was that what I was? A newborn? How could that be?
"Renesmee, I'm sure you have a few questions sweetheart, but right now, we should hunt." My father said, his eyes watching me carefully.
Hunt? And suddenly, hunting was the only thing on my mind.