Author's Notes: I just love the prompt reviews, I just had to write this one ASAP for that reason, well that and boredom. Please let me know what you think of this chapter.
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Uzumaki Naruto was never much of a camper, despite spending almost three years with a hobo sage he didn't really pick up much in the art of wilderness survival.
He didn't really know what berries to eat, he didn't know you weren't supposed to drink water without boiling it first, and he certainly didn't know how to tell where north was.
So it really didn't come to a surprise that after hours worth of running at a direction that he thought was "north" he realized that he probably wasn't in Fire Country anymore.
The first clue was when he seemed to have run out into a beach and saw another strip of land on the other side.
Not being very clever he decided to chance it and swam across the sea to the other continental strip, surely he must be getting closer to Konoha, after all he was chasing where "north" was but after seeing the land now getting very foggy he started having second thoughts.
His second clue was the high mountains he had to climb and the tropical evergreen forests that seemed to be surrounding the dense fog. Naruto had to admit this land was absolutely beautiful.
He could see birds flying across the sky over this dense romantic landscape and it left him in awe and wonder.
Sure he was hungry, starving even, and smelled like feces but being out here alone in this vast mountainous forest high above the normal world gave him a sense of peace that he did not believe was possible.
As he started walking across this mountain he tripped on something, growling he took a look at what he fell over. To his surprise it was a large tattered sign.
"You are entering Unraikyo. Proceed at your own discretion," Naruto read out loud.
Naruto just shrugged off the message and proceeded towards a waterfall. He took a good look at his reflection and frowned.
His hair was a mess, he had dirt all over his face, he only wore boxers, and there were fragmented facial hair around his adolescent face.
He made a mental note to never EVER forget to shave, due to his kyuubi healing factor Naruto actually had a problem with his nails always growing back quickly along with that idiotic blond mustache that distinctly looked like a perfect rectangle.
Taking off his boxer's Naruto laid them down on the forest floor and jumped into the waterfall pit. Shivering he scrubbed his hide clean and came back to the shore to look for his boxers.
The problem was a large song nesting bird had flown off with it. Some nesting birds tend to have preferences for certain coloring, they like to build their nests with strips of colors to attract mates.
Naruto's black boxer's were this breed of birds preferential color so when the bird saw a large strip of black fabric laying near its feeding ground, it just couldn't resist.
"Hey! Come back, those are my boxers you retarded pigeon!" Naruto shouted running after the thing bareback through the forest.
The bird continued to fly higher and higher, Naruto tried to run up across the tops of trees and jumped up to try and catch it, but the bird just kept soaring.
Uzumaki Naruto spent the next hour trying to get his boxer's back but soon lost hope and fell down back into the grassy mountain roads frowning. Now he had nothing. He felt so naked and ashamed.
He just hoped it wouldn't start raining.
As if on cue he felt a large intense heat nearby and saw intense black flames covering the forest just south of where he was.
Panicking Naruto rushed out to escape the flames. The steam rising from the burning caused water to evaporate into the air and create cumulonimbus clouds and he could already hear the sounds of lightning crack the earth.
A few minutes later heavy rain started falling around the area, dousing the flames but to no avail. The only compensation was the black flames weren't spreading.
Still Naruto decided it was high time to escape the forest if something freaky like that happened again.
Deciding that it was best to head around the direction from where the black flames came from Naruto set forth on his mission to find civilization. Eventually he ran into the ruins of what looked like a hut, it looked like there had been a fight here just recently. There were 7 swords all scattered nearby too.
Feeling so chilly and nude the boy decided that it was just as well that no one saw him at his state.
Looking up to the distance Naruto saw a ninja run away, perhaps to give a message to someone. Naruto was determined to follow.
"Hey wait up!"
It didn't seem like messenger ninja-san heard him, but Naruto kept up as best he could. His time in the forest hadn't given him any special speed powers or anything and it was hard to chase after someone stark naked when your sausage kept hitting your thighs.
When it seemed that he wasn't going to catch up anyway Naruto took a break for the sake of his future children and decided that perhaps he should put on some leaves or make some clothes so as not to embarrass the shit out of any potential help he came across.
After searching for something to wear and finding nothing he took a rest near the bushes of a nearby bridge.
Closing his eyes he went to sleep holding himself in a fetus position, he thanked Kami no one would see him like this.
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