Headmaster Dippet smiled as he looked out over the sea of student heads making their way to the best seats in the Great Hall. Normally, the teens would have sat at their house tables, but the Headmaster had worked hard to adjust the massive room. Now, instead of four long tables stretching down the hall, with the teacher's table at the end, there stood a giant screen at the end, and a multitude of red, scratchy, flip-down chairs arranged in an alternating order. Dippet snickered under his breath as four unruly fifth years entered the hall, arms linked. He exchanged a glance with the current Transfigurations professor, and soon-to-be Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore. Next to Dumbledore was the soon-to-be Transfigurations professor, Minerva McGonagall. She was standing slightly in front of Dumbledore, and was involved in attempting to hide their conjoined hands.

The Headmaster coughed, and, with a meaningful look at the pair, said, "Despite the fact that the Great Hall is now the replica of a muggle cinema, I will not tolerate you two being the hormonal couple in the back row." At this, McGonagall blushed and removed her hand, and Dumbledore merely gave him a twinkling smile and questioned him as to where exactly did he have to deal with a hormonal couple in the back row. As the conversation behind her degraded into a rather lusty chat about young females, the length of their clothing, and rather explicit ideas on the use of sherbet lemons, McGonagall turned to view the students she would have to teach the next year, and groaned out loud at the thought of having to teach THOSE four.

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THOSE four, at the time, were standing in a chain. The one on the far left was spending his time leering at any passerby, male or female. Another, attempting to whap his companion upside the head with a rather large Charms book, while still maintaining linked arms. The third, laughing at anyone who, when caught with the formers glance, would either blush or hide, and the last, on the far right, leering in a decidedly less perverted way, again at either sex. Soon however, he became all too aware of his short-comings, and whined, "C'mon Siri! Lemme have a go at them!"

Siri, AKA Sirius Black, Padfoot, Perv, Mutt, and Marauder Number Two, turned and gave the speaker a decidedly scornful look. "First off, Jamsey-poo, you can't leer. Second, no way in hell. Thirdly, you've got spinach between your teeth." With that, he turned and continued leering, with barely a glance at the sandy-haired man next to Jamsey-poo.

Jamesy-poo, AKA James Potter, Prongs, Seeker, Prat, and Marauder Number One, glared at his handsome friend, and said, in an outraged voice, "I haven't even had spinach today!" The effect was lost, unfortunately, as at that exact moment, Sirius decided to conjure a mirror and comb, and began to brush his hair. He leaned over slightly, raised an eyebrow, and turned the mirror towards James, only to show him that three whole fucking spinach leaves were stuck between his front teeth. As Sirius had been too distracted to cast the charm, James turned to the sandy-haired man next to him and growled, "Remy…"

Remy, AKA Remus Lupin, Moony, Wolf-boy, Nerd, and Marauder Number Three, looked at James, dramatically gasped, jumped backwards (their arms were unlinked by now), and said, in a failing voice, "Why James! You have three spinach leaves between your teeth. You really ought to brush them more often. You really, really ought to." As he said this, he calmly slipped his wand back into his sleeve, then turned to the smaller boy next to him and said, "Pete, lookit this! An embarrassment hex! Including spinach! That's very ironic."

Pete, AKA Peter Pettigrew, Wormtail, ……... and Marauder Number Four, gasped and clapped his hands to his mouth. As soon as he gained control of his voice, (he had to stop laughing first), he wheezed, "Ironic indeed. Prongs' misfortune must have caused the book to sympathize!" He then proceeded to lose all control, and burst out laughing at the look of fury on James's face. Before James could begin the hexing, the Headmaster called out, "Please be seated!" And as everyone knows, NO ONE disobeys the Headmaster. The four instantly plunked down in four seats, and Peter, having gone to a cinema before, whispered, "Who's got the popcorn?", and was then instantly smacked in the head by the Charms book.

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"As some of you have already found out," Headmaster Dippet began when the masses had settled, "This is going to be my last week as the Headmaster of Hogwarts. And," he continued, raising his voice above the whispered cheers, "As the times are growing darker than we would have liked, I thought that this would be a good time to have some cheering up in regards to the future!

"Standing next to me is Mr. Andrea (An-dray-ah) Corith (Core-ih-th). He is an old friend of mine from the US, and he has brought to my knowledge a charm, which only he, unfortunately, can cast. This charm is tied to his seer blood, and, when cast, it allows the future to be seen. Now, as I am not completely sure myself about how this magic works, I believe I shall let him take the stage!"

Amid the cheers and catcalls from the student audience, a young man stood up on a platform right next to the gigantic screen. He was a very tall, very stretched out sort of man, extremely thin, and wiry. While he appeared normal at first, people began to notice that his eyes were different colors, one a deep brown, and the other a very pale green. "It's got to be a charm," James muttered, looking rather freaked out. Sirius shook his head in a very dog-like manner and said, "Naw, it's some kind of imbalance or something. Dogs get it sometimes. Took me three tries to get rid of it when we went Animagi."

"I knew that…… Prick."

Corith cleared his throat nervously, and said, in a surprisingly deep, yet rather nasally voice, "What the charm does, exactly, is it combines the essence of a persons magic with my seer ability. Alright, that doesn't explain it… Well, you see this?" He raised his hand, holding up a small metal cube, only two inches across. On top of the cube was a red push button. That was it. "This cube is what whoever using the charm would hold. They would press the button with their left thumb, and hold it in for a few seconds. It kind of pulls their magic from them, but only for a second. It contains some of my blood, giving it the seer-ish ability. After the button's been pressed, I'll cast the charm, and what will show up on the screen is not your, but your children's future, determined by your magical destiny." Corith had become so engrossed in what he was saying that he didn't even notice when he switched tenses. As he went on to explain exactly what magical destiny was, and why it showed the child's life instead of the user's, Sirius leaned back in his chair and muttered, "Destiny. Riiiiiight." James had put his head down on the armrest, and at that, he snorted. "He sounds like Professor Farivarderchii. Definitely the craziest faerie that I've ever seen."

"Eh. You can't blame the guy for his heritage."

"Yeah, but I can blame him for rotting my lungs. And Evans complains of cigarette smoke."

"Evans will never go out with you." Sirius kicked his feet up onto the seat in front of him. "She bloody hates you."

James sighed. "And yet you can always see her with the grease-ball. Honestly, how can she even be friends with the guy! Let alone have dated him!"

"Maybe," a rather silky voice hissed from the row behind them, "because I don't treat her like a bloody object!"

All four of the self proclaimed Marauders turned abruptly in their seats. Behind them sat not only Lily Evans, but also Severus Snape.

"Snivellus," Sirius hissed. "Soooooo good to see that you've taken a shower. But I prefer the other look." With that, he began to draw out his wand, when Remus sharply elbowed him in the side, and pointed up to the now silent speaker. Sirius hastily turned back in his seat, but luckily, Corith hadn't seen him. Instead, he once again cleared his throat, and asked, "Now, who would like to be the first to see their future sons and daughters?"

With no more than a glance, all four pranksters stood up, and declared themselves to be first. Corith called them up, and several sixth and seventh years muttered under their breath about the younger years always going first.

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Sirius bounded up on stage, shook Corith's hand, and arrogantly called out to the crowd, "Fifth year, Sirius Black, best bet for girls and boys alike. Owl me." Remus once again smacked him upside the head, and then turned to the other two and said, "Three galleons on him having a bunch of bastards running about the place." Peter shook his head, proclaiming that Sirius couldn't be so heartless, while James instantly shook Remus's hand, and said, "Done". With that, and with a toss of his head, in a rather seductive way, Sirius pushed the button.

A loud buzzing noise filled the hall, and the screen turned black with two words scrawled across it. NO CHILDREN.

"Damn it!" Remus snapped, as he pulled three galleons out of his pocket and handed them to a smugly smirking James. Sirius stepped down with a rather puzzled and disappointed look. "Your turn Moony." He said, clapping him on the shoulder, then the ass. Remus turned around, and with a rather smug look of his own and said, "Tough luck, Padfoot. One must wonder whether Snape finally cracked and used the castration curse. After all, it IS meant to be used on dogs." With that he spun around, pressed the button, and completely ignored the indignant splutters issuing from Sirius.

It was Sirius's turn to gloat when the same message appeared for Remus, causing James to burst out in laughter. "I KNEW IT!" he cried, "Padfoot and Moony, sittin' in a tree, F-U-C-"

"MR. POTTER! Ten points from Gryffindor!"

He shrugged, and then, with a leer to both Black and Lupin, began to go onto the platform, only to see Peter standing there about to press the button. Almost immediately Peter began to step down, but James merely waved his hand and let him go. Again there was the loud buzzing, and the NO CHILDREN message. Peter, seeing the words, began to tear at the eyes, and sniffle.

"Don't worry ol' chum!" Sirius teased, arms wrapped around Remus, resting on his waist. "Maybe you've just found out that you're really gay, or bi, like us!" But he just shook his head and stepped down of the platform, head hanging low. "Your turn," he said, in a downcast tone.

James paused, as if wishing to comfort his downtrodden friend, but, torn between knowing his future, and comforting Peter, he picked the button. When he pressed it, a short series of short beeps were heard, along with the following text, "ONE CHILD".

"It's a boy!" Everyone in the room, excluding Corith, jumped when they heard a deeper James voice echo around the room. "What are we gonna call him Lils?"

At that moment, the text faded, and an image showed up on the screen, showing a woman lying on a hospital bed, holding a small baby with black hair, and opening green eyes.

Lily Evans' voice echoed as well, sounding exhausted, relieved, and overjoyed all at once as she said, "Harry. Harry James Potter."