I'll Be Waiting
Chapter 2
Yue needed her now; he needed her to be there just like the way she used to be. Yue needed Kina to be the way she was before everything changed. After the responsibilities of life began to stick their ugly faces in their life, the reality of getting jobs and not just depending on her training center. And she knew she had to be there for him. Kina knew hearts were tender and fragile, and she knew she couldn't drop his just because she no longer wished to carry it right now. That was selfish. Just because she wanted to relax and shove everything on him didn't mean it was right of her too. Yue was just so up tight and protective she was beginning to hate him for it. One second he would look at her with those puppy eyes, enthralling her to run back to him and fall into his arms, and the next he would be just as protective and insensitive as he was before. Didn't he trust her? Just because she was going out to get ice cream by herself didn't mean he had to trail along, a person needs some time to themselves. But maybe she was just being selfish. Two-faced – that's what he was being to her. Kina just wanted to be left alone every once in a while.
"You seem like you've been very happy lately." Yue looked up at Kina as she stepped into the kitchen.
"Yes, I've been having a lot of fun with Mikey." Right when she said it, she regretted her words.
"Why have you been playing with him so much? Do you not have fun with me?"
"Oh are you jealous of the eight year old! Come on, he's just a kid, it's not like we're flirting with each other." Again, regret smacked her in the face. She wanted to stop saying these words and yet they just kept spilling out of her mouth.
Yue stared at her blankly as if she were stupid. Kina sure felt like it at the moment.
"I'm not jealous, I'm just doubting that you even love me still! We've only been married for six months and already it seems like you're bored of me!!!" His voice was so extremely loud, so threateningly loud that it alone sped up Kina's heart rate. Kina's words towards Yue were like hitting him with a dull object – it annoyed but made little to no effect. On the contrary, his demands were like a double-edged knife, piercing further and further into her until she would simply have to break down and confess how locked up she had been feeling.
"I've just been feeling so locked up, you won't let me do anything fun!"
"Fun? So now I'm not fun? We just need to get reality sorted out, we need a home! What if we have a kid, we can't just hope we have the money, we need to plan for the future!!" Yue was still hostile, aggressive, attacking her with that knife like a homicidal maniac. He wasn't backing down on this and it didn't look like he would allow Kina to succeed.
She stammered for words, "You can never understand. No one can."
"You're telling me that your own husband can't understand you?" He was standing up now, getting closer to Kina.
She choked knowing she was trapped. Her eyes darted in every direction except for his, feeling the heat of the room was intensifying. "Kina, do you still love me?" He said an unexpected statement.
"What? What kind of question is that?" – an expected response, taken entirely off guard.
"It's a question. Answer it." – a demand.
"Of course I still love you! W-we made it through the Pools of Love!" She replied franticly.
"Are you sure about that?" He began to yell.
"Do you want me to say no?! What more do you want from me?" Hitomi sniped the words. "You, Yue, YOU. All right? Are you happy now?"
"No," he answered her bluntly, almost in a comedic fashion although his voice was dry and horribly threatening – far from funny. "As a matter of fact I'm not."
"Yue I—" Kina interrupted.
"It hurts me when you lie to me like that." H said with surprisingly quiet and melancholic.
Her eyes were the windows to her soul, and Yue had looked through that glass enough times to know the truth of her words even before she spoke them. There was no escape, "I'm not lying, I just hate how we go in circles like this! I'm not a glass doll; I won't break if I fall! I'm not a child; I don't need you looking after me all the time! Yue, I LOVE YOU, but not when you treat me like this!" Tears now clouded her eyes.
Leaning over he rested his right hand onto her cheek.
Kina flinched for a second, feeling the hairs bristle on the back of her neck, almost having to hold herself back from violently slapping his hand away.
Then, he froze. He removed his hand, and stared at her with an image almost as hurt as it was highly questioning. His eyes looked forlorn, lost, confounded. His hands remained inert, held in the air no longer touching Kina after feeling her immediate withdrawal. Yue took a deep breath. No one spoke for almost an unbearable minute.
"I'm sorry!" Finally, Kina gave in to the impeccable pressure, not longing to see his hurt image any more. Although, honestly she did feel upset with him, she realized now: what right did she have to be upset? Why should she be mad at Yue? The only person she could be possibly mad at was none other than her own self.
"Why did you do that?" Yue asked the question. There was no emotion to his voice, as he remained standing, looking down at her.
Kina, who felt now a hundred times smaller, ducked her head in confused shame, eyes hidden behind red hair. Why did she cringe like that? Was she angry? Was she upset with him? She still detested the way he was speaking with her, so doubtful and cynical, but then again, he had every right to act that way. She had been distant and stubborn while he was doing what he thought best for her. Kina was the one who was screwing around with the regularity of life. She was the one who had decided to bring such a tumultuous twist to something that had once been so ordered, so already complete in its entirety.
"Why did you just react like that?" He posed the question a second time. "Kina, what is it? You don't want me touching you anymore, is that it?"
She stared at the floor.
"Is there something wrong with my hands, Kina?" Yue woke her a second time. His voice was strong and challenging, displaying his palms and ten fingers, making them viewable against the table.
"Yue I—" A scramble for words – interrupted and unsuccessful.
"So what is it Kina, huh?" He brought his weight back off the surface of the table, eyes flaming with his words. He looked angry to her, upset, but somewhere within, Yue looked hurt. She knew it; she could still sense it. Even though he was mad at the moment, Yue was vulnerable. He didn't know what to do with Kina, as she didn't know what she would do with herself.
"First you don't want me to put my hands on your cheek," he continued quietly now; voice lowering, hushed and almost even shimmering with each word of unexpected emotion. He stood near her, leaning his weight against the dining table, staring at the back of his hands, blinking softly, "Now you won't even let me touch you at all." His head titled in her direction, silvery bangs falling handsomely to his cheeks. His broken eyes lay upon her. They were quiet eyes. Familiar eyes. Sad eyes.
Kina found that her breath was caught tightly. She was facing him. Kina was not avoiding it this time – she wanted to see him. She wanted to meet his words with the same emphasis and strength, but just upon looking at him she could already feel herself growing not stronger, but weaker. Such sadness. She hadn't seen it before, possibly because she had been doing everything but looking at him directly. But it had to be direct. It was strong, upsetting and sad. Kina didn't know how to relate to such a thing, trying but knowing she could not remember a time when Yue looked so inconsolable, so used, and so very abandoned. Why? Why did he feel this way?
Her eyes stared at the floor, she couldn't look at him, "No Yue, it's just that I-I'm sweaty from running around... I need to go get a shower." She looked away from his gaze as he laid his hands onto her shoulders.
His heavy hands grew even more immense in weight upon her shoulders, like they were shoving her into the ground feet first. He was close enough to her that she could feel his warm breath blowing on her face, warm hands almost suffocating her from any space at all. He was crowding her, and she didn't like it. She didn't like this tension, this silence, this pressure to do something, to resolve this mess, when she didn't even know how. She didn't know what to say! And so, Kina was left standing and facing her husband, now looking not only stupid, but also mute. She began to wonder: Why was she mad at him? Sure, sure, so he was making her uncomfortable and he was being sort of insensitive, but if he really knew how locked up she felt, he would be mad. She looked back at him, as she had never blinked yet. She felt afraid, focused, angry, upset and alone. They shared the same emotions, but Kina couldn't see that common advantage. She only saw differences. She could only see vast differences between them, differences she did not like. Those hands were pressing and demanding, and they were beginning to hurt her. Not emotionally or mentally or verbally, but physically. They were actually starting to hurt her.
Kina's eyes blinked once. He wanted a reply; he wanted her to say something. The silence was tedious. Something had to be said.
"Yue," she hushed quietly, guiltily, and remorsefully. "Don't touch me." Turning around, she dashed into the bathroom while trying to hid the tears that where blinding her vision. Inside the shower, she fell against the wall and slid down, leaning her head against the marble as she cried.
~*~
Nuriko looked at Yue who was still bent over a sheet of paper, pretending to be reading. He angrily slammed his fist on the table, causing Hotohori to wince but hold his tongue from screaming at Yue. Hotohori turned towards Nuriko and gave him a look.
"Ugh, it's always up to us to set things straight. Are we the only sane one's in this house?" Nuriko joked quietly to Hotohori.
"Yue." Hotohori gently sat his hand on Yue's shoulder; "Can you stop for a moment?"
"Yes Hori?" Yue stopped and looked up at the chestnut haired bishonen who promptly pulled a chair out and sat down.
"I've been worried about how things have been between Kina and you after your honeymoon."
"We're fine." He raised a silvery eyebrow at Hotohori, trying to hide the fact they had just had a bad, bad argument. But they where probably so loud that Hotohori and Nuriko had heard everything.
"It seems like lately you've been keeping Kina locked up in here. No offense or anything, don't get mad at me, but..." Hotohori looked at Nuriko for some help.
The braided boy quickly came to Hotohori's aid, "What Hori is trying to say is this. Kina is like a bird, if you keep her locked up she'll just wilt away. And if she's caged too long there's is always a possibility she'll fly away as soon as the door's open. She needs to fly, to be able to explore on her own and if you let her then she'll always invite you to join her."
"That whole ordeal with Tigress was horrible, we all thought Kina had died. But she didn't and we can't protect her from everything." Nuriko interrupted Hotohori.
"You wouldn't understand. How would you feel Hotohori, if you lost Nuriko?" Yue turned towards the two bishonen.
"I would be lost forever, I can't even imagine something that terrible." Hotohori replied as Nuriko blushed.
"I felt a throbbing pain all through my body and I know if I had to feel it again, I wouldn't be able to stand it. I can't lose her a second time." Yue clenched his hands as he spoke.
"But keeping her locked up in the apartment won't prevent it, it's only asking for trouble. You're suffocating her." Nuriko explained.
"I'm not suffocating her!" Yue sighed softly. He knew it was no use arguing he couldn't stand any more arguing, "Tomorrow, tomorrow I'll take her out to that light thing. But right now I think I need to go on a walk." He gradually stood up and grabbed his jacket. With a quick motion, he wrapped the jacket around him then opened the door.
"Should we tell Kina you're going for a walk?" Nuriko called out to Yue as he stepped out of the apartment.
"No, I'll be back soon." With a swinging motion, he closed the door behind him.
Chapter 2
Yue needed her now; he needed her to be there just like the way she used to be. Yue needed Kina to be the way she was before everything changed. After the responsibilities of life began to stick their ugly faces in their life, the reality of getting jobs and not just depending on her training center. And she knew she had to be there for him. Kina knew hearts were tender and fragile, and she knew she couldn't drop his just because she no longer wished to carry it right now. That was selfish. Just because she wanted to relax and shove everything on him didn't mean it was right of her too. Yue was just so up tight and protective she was beginning to hate him for it. One second he would look at her with those puppy eyes, enthralling her to run back to him and fall into his arms, and the next he would be just as protective and insensitive as he was before. Didn't he trust her? Just because she was going out to get ice cream by herself didn't mean he had to trail along, a person needs some time to themselves. But maybe she was just being selfish. Two-faced – that's what he was being to her. Kina just wanted to be left alone every once in a while.
"You seem like you've been very happy lately." Yue looked up at Kina as she stepped into the kitchen.
"Yes, I've been having a lot of fun with Mikey." Right when she said it, she regretted her words.
"Why have you been playing with him so much? Do you not have fun with me?"
"Oh are you jealous of the eight year old! Come on, he's just a kid, it's not like we're flirting with each other." Again, regret smacked her in the face. She wanted to stop saying these words and yet they just kept spilling out of her mouth.
Yue stared at her blankly as if she were stupid. Kina sure felt like it at the moment.
"I'm not jealous, I'm just doubting that you even love me still! We've only been married for six months and already it seems like you're bored of me!!!" His voice was so extremely loud, so threateningly loud that it alone sped up Kina's heart rate. Kina's words towards Yue were like hitting him with a dull object – it annoyed but made little to no effect. On the contrary, his demands were like a double-edged knife, piercing further and further into her until she would simply have to break down and confess how locked up she had been feeling.
"I've just been feeling so locked up, you won't let me do anything fun!"
"Fun? So now I'm not fun? We just need to get reality sorted out, we need a home! What if we have a kid, we can't just hope we have the money, we need to plan for the future!!" Yue was still hostile, aggressive, attacking her with that knife like a homicidal maniac. He wasn't backing down on this and it didn't look like he would allow Kina to succeed.
She stammered for words, "You can never understand. No one can."
"You're telling me that your own husband can't understand you?" He was standing up now, getting closer to Kina.
She choked knowing she was trapped. Her eyes darted in every direction except for his, feeling the heat of the room was intensifying. "Kina, do you still love me?" He said an unexpected statement.
"What? What kind of question is that?" – an expected response, taken entirely off guard.
"It's a question. Answer it." – a demand.
"Of course I still love you! W-we made it through the Pools of Love!" She replied franticly.
"Are you sure about that?" He began to yell.
"Do you want me to say no?! What more do you want from me?" Hitomi sniped the words. "You, Yue, YOU. All right? Are you happy now?"
"No," he answered her bluntly, almost in a comedic fashion although his voice was dry and horribly threatening – far from funny. "As a matter of fact I'm not."
"Yue I—" Kina interrupted.
"It hurts me when you lie to me like that." H said with surprisingly quiet and melancholic.
Her eyes were the windows to her soul, and Yue had looked through that glass enough times to know the truth of her words even before she spoke them. There was no escape, "I'm not lying, I just hate how we go in circles like this! I'm not a glass doll; I won't break if I fall! I'm not a child; I don't need you looking after me all the time! Yue, I LOVE YOU, but not when you treat me like this!" Tears now clouded her eyes.
Leaning over he rested his right hand onto her cheek.
Kina flinched for a second, feeling the hairs bristle on the back of her neck, almost having to hold herself back from violently slapping his hand away.
Then, he froze. He removed his hand, and stared at her with an image almost as hurt as it was highly questioning. His eyes looked forlorn, lost, confounded. His hands remained inert, held in the air no longer touching Kina after feeling her immediate withdrawal. Yue took a deep breath. No one spoke for almost an unbearable minute.
"I'm sorry!" Finally, Kina gave in to the impeccable pressure, not longing to see his hurt image any more. Although, honestly she did feel upset with him, she realized now: what right did she have to be upset? Why should she be mad at Yue? The only person she could be possibly mad at was none other than her own self.
"Why did you do that?" Yue asked the question. There was no emotion to his voice, as he remained standing, looking down at her.
Kina, who felt now a hundred times smaller, ducked her head in confused shame, eyes hidden behind red hair. Why did she cringe like that? Was she angry? Was she upset with him? She still detested the way he was speaking with her, so doubtful and cynical, but then again, he had every right to act that way. She had been distant and stubborn while he was doing what he thought best for her. Kina was the one who was screwing around with the regularity of life. She was the one who had decided to bring such a tumultuous twist to something that had once been so ordered, so already complete in its entirety.
"Why did you just react like that?" He posed the question a second time. "Kina, what is it? You don't want me touching you anymore, is that it?"
She stared at the floor.
"Is there something wrong with my hands, Kina?" Yue woke her a second time. His voice was strong and challenging, displaying his palms and ten fingers, making them viewable against the table.
"Yue I—" A scramble for words – interrupted and unsuccessful.
"So what is it Kina, huh?" He brought his weight back off the surface of the table, eyes flaming with his words. He looked angry to her, upset, but somewhere within, Yue looked hurt. She knew it; she could still sense it. Even though he was mad at the moment, Yue was vulnerable. He didn't know what to do with Kina, as she didn't know what she would do with herself.
"First you don't want me to put my hands on your cheek," he continued quietly now; voice lowering, hushed and almost even shimmering with each word of unexpected emotion. He stood near her, leaning his weight against the dining table, staring at the back of his hands, blinking softly, "Now you won't even let me touch you at all." His head titled in her direction, silvery bangs falling handsomely to his cheeks. His broken eyes lay upon her. They were quiet eyes. Familiar eyes. Sad eyes.
Kina found that her breath was caught tightly. She was facing him. Kina was not avoiding it this time – she wanted to see him. She wanted to meet his words with the same emphasis and strength, but just upon looking at him she could already feel herself growing not stronger, but weaker. Such sadness. She hadn't seen it before, possibly because she had been doing everything but looking at him directly. But it had to be direct. It was strong, upsetting and sad. Kina didn't know how to relate to such a thing, trying but knowing she could not remember a time when Yue looked so inconsolable, so used, and so very abandoned. Why? Why did he feel this way?
Her eyes stared at the floor, she couldn't look at him, "No Yue, it's just that I-I'm sweaty from running around... I need to go get a shower." She looked away from his gaze as he laid his hands onto her shoulders.
His heavy hands grew even more immense in weight upon her shoulders, like they were shoving her into the ground feet first. He was close enough to her that she could feel his warm breath blowing on her face, warm hands almost suffocating her from any space at all. He was crowding her, and she didn't like it. She didn't like this tension, this silence, this pressure to do something, to resolve this mess, when she didn't even know how. She didn't know what to say! And so, Kina was left standing and facing her husband, now looking not only stupid, but also mute. She began to wonder: Why was she mad at him? Sure, sure, so he was making her uncomfortable and he was being sort of insensitive, but if he really knew how locked up she felt, he would be mad. She looked back at him, as she had never blinked yet. She felt afraid, focused, angry, upset and alone. They shared the same emotions, but Kina couldn't see that common advantage. She only saw differences. She could only see vast differences between them, differences she did not like. Those hands were pressing and demanding, and they were beginning to hurt her. Not emotionally or mentally or verbally, but physically. They were actually starting to hurt her.
Kina's eyes blinked once. He wanted a reply; he wanted her to say something. The silence was tedious. Something had to be said.
"Yue," she hushed quietly, guiltily, and remorsefully. "Don't touch me." Turning around, she dashed into the bathroom while trying to hid the tears that where blinding her vision. Inside the shower, she fell against the wall and slid down, leaning her head against the marble as she cried.
~*~
Nuriko looked at Yue who was still bent over a sheet of paper, pretending to be reading. He angrily slammed his fist on the table, causing Hotohori to wince but hold his tongue from screaming at Yue. Hotohori turned towards Nuriko and gave him a look.
"Ugh, it's always up to us to set things straight. Are we the only sane one's in this house?" Nuriko joked quietly to Hotohori.
"Yue." Hotohori gently sat his hand on Yue's shoulder; "Can you stop for a moment?"
"Yes Hori?" Yue stopped and looked up at the chestnut haired bishonen who promptly pulled a chair out and sat down.
"I've been worried about how things have been between Kina and you after your honeymoon."
"We're fine." He raised a silvery eyebrow at Hotohori, trying to hide the fact they had just had a bad, bad argument. But they where probably so loud that Hotohori and Nuriko had heard everything.
"It seems like lately you've been keeping Kina locked up in here. No offense or anything, don't get mad at me, but..." Hotohori looked at Nuriko for some help.
The braided boy quickly came to Hotohori's aid, "What Hori is trying to say is this. Kina is like a bird, if you keep her locked up she'll just wilt away. And if she's caged too long there's is always a possibility she'll fly away as soon as the door's open. She needs to fly, to be able to explore on her own and if you let her then she'll always invite you to join her."
"That whole ordeal with Tigress was horrible, we all thought Kina had died. But she didn't and we can't protect her from everything." Nuriko interrupted Hotohori.
"You wouldn't understand. How would you feel Hotohori, if you lost Nuriko?" Yue turned towards the two bishonen.
"I would be lost forever, I can't even imagine something that terrible." Hotohori replied as Nuriko blushed.
"I felt a throbbing pain all through my body and I know if I had to feel it again, I wouldn't be able to stand it. I can't lose her a second time." Yue clenched his hands as he spoke.
"But keeping her locked up in the apartment won't prevent it, it's only asking for trouble. You're suffocating her." Nuriko explained.
"I'm not suffocating her!" Yue sighed softly. He knew it was no use arguing he couldn't stand any more arguing, "Tomorrow, tomorrow I'll take her out to that light thing. But right now I think I need to go on a walk." He gradually stood up and grabbed his jacket. With a quick motion, he wrapped the jacket around him then opened the door.
"Should we tell Kina you're going for a walk?" Nuriko called out to Yue as he stepped out of the apartment.
"No, I'll be back soon." With a swinging motion, he closed the door behind him.