"Let's go home everybody" Amy announces, as if on some sort of cue, everybody gets out of their chairs. I need to find him now. After all, I don't want to miss out on the hot dressing room confession/make out scene; I've been planning it for months. I walk over to Paul, who looks really happy "Wow congr-"I run past Paul. I need to find Draco. I need to find him now. My heart is pounding as I run out of the double doors and into the shockingly cold air. Its dark now, the tiny dots of stars sprinkling the dark indigo of the sky, I can barely make out Draco's bright yellow sports car is just pulling out of the parking space.
I wave with my whole arm "STOP I WANT TO KISS YOU!" strangely enough; he doesn't stop. We'll see each other at the spin off, I tell myself It will be okay. Just then, as if to prove me wrong that it won't be alright;Someone pushes me from behind and I instinctively spin around, no tent to stop me this time. My teeth are bared, but my jaw drops open when I see Paul. He doesn't look as happy as he was before. "Sorry" he's sincere enough, I guess.
I won! Did you see me? Did you see Draco? Are you excited for the spin off? I am ! OMG I can't wait to start shooting it! You're going to love me, especially sense I'm so good at acting like me! I have to go to a meeting about it soon, play around with the idea a bit. Have any ideas? Post them in the comments box below, I don't think they'll ever be as good as the idea I have though, but I'm trying to make you feel a part of something important in your meaningless, unimportant lives. (You can't be that important if you reading my blog face it. CAN YOU? OMG CALL ME IF YOU ARE!)
So, like, I have to go soon, putting on my foundation at the moment… that's what all the movie stars do, right? It feels weird but I think I'm going to look okay. Draco will be there so I have to look more then okay. Have any suggestions for me? PLEASE!
That was my original post. I sound vain don't I? I'm sorry – not because of all the angry comments about the "important" thing demanding me to say that. But SOMEBODY has to talk me up, don't they? No one else is… (Hint, hint DRACO) I'm just so angry right now - I just got a call saying that Draco's called in sick and he won't be there at the meeting. Probably just trying to avoid me AGAIN! He's just so shy when it comes to his feelings about me… I can tell he really loves me, he can't hide it, not to me, he tries to, though. With the whole "Bessie" thing – it's just a cover. Don't worry though; I'll get to decide tons of things for the spin off. ;) ;) ;)
WATCH IT! IT'LL BE SO AWESOME!
Paul isn't talking to me at the moment – I can't figure out why, I think he might be jealous…
SOMEONE WHO KNOWS RELATIONSHIPS (FRIENDS) PLEASE HELP ME!
Comment(s) (1)
VICTOR: COME ON!
The building is low and grey, the parking lot is devoid of any type of yellow vehicles. It'd be easier to decide ideas without Draco being here anyways, or at least, that's what I keep telling myself. I'm sure he'd reject the shower scene in front of everyone anyways. I have a good idea how this will go, the blonde one, Anna, and the man will say no to it, Harry too. But Amy and Bessie would agree because they're cool. I wasn't sure about anyone else.
I push open the glass double doors, warm air immediately breezing out to greet me. I can hear voices and smell coffee. I hope I get some too, I'm starving. The walls are a dark grey/ blue and there's only four doors in the narrow hallway, one of them is wide open, but I can only see the edge of a table from here. I open all the other doors just to make sure I won't be wasting my time going into that one.
I see the man judge on a toilet, he freaks out, I apologize and I see two other empty rooms before I follow the man judge into the opened room. To my surprise, that's where everybody is. By everybody I mean the two other judges.
"Hey!" Amy says, drops her feet from the table, she's wearing a long, unzipped black hoody, skull converse sneakers and baggy jeans. I wonder if she has a split personality when she's on stage or something before taking a seat across from her. The table is huge; it could seat twelve people and looked like it came from one of those business movies. The donuts are in the middle of the table and they smell delicious, there's a Tim Horton's coffee cup beside it. The blonde judge looks bored, with her head in her hands, and the man judge is looking at some papers, Amy's watching him intently, "So, what do you think?" She asks
I don't think they'd notice if I just… I put my arm around the box and start to pull it towards me…. the blonde judge glares at me. "Don't you want to pay attention to your show?" My face feels hot, but I think I'm safe to say I wasn't blushing; all that foundation probably covers it. Amy takes the paper from the man and places it in front of me, she points to one of the many rectangles on the page "There's been higher ratings whenever we show you on the show" She smiles, she looks really happy so I smile too. "By ratings she means more comments below the YouTube version" the man judge mutters. "And just think of all the more we'll get on the spin off!" Amy says brightly.
"I have an idea!" I join in brightly
The blonde one seems to perk up "Can you put it to a song?"
What? "Um…"
"We'll need to run it over with him first" It seems like Amy's reminding her of something, the blonde one nods.
Amy and the blonde one are in a huge black skull monster truck, driving over old Tim Horton's cups that litter the pavement. The blonde one sighs "I wish we could run over the donuts"
Amy waves a finger at her "We'll need to run more stuff over with Victor first"
On Draco's website it said that he hated things being put to waste and was disgusted by road kill. I bring my feet up so I'm squatting on my chair, I just get a glimpse of their terrified/confused expressions before I throw myself at the donut box.
It's harder to chew them without using my hands then I thought it would be, but at least they're not all squashed and the chocolate tastes so good! I don't notice they're pulling me back before I hit the back the chair and glare at them each in turn. Little bits of brown are all over my clothes, the table and in the box.
The blonde one walks out of the room, looking deeply offended. Amy has her arms crossed across her chest. "Do you still think it's a good idea?" Cedric asks, cocking his head in my direction like he thinks I'm too stupid to get what they were talking about. They were obviously wondering if they should still run over the donuts if they have such a fierce protector like me working with them.
"Now more then ever!" Amy says enthusiastically, I have to suppress the tears as I think of crumbling donuts gone to waste sitting on the asphalt, dirt and mud and slush on it. "He's perfect – like he's made for it" She continues.
The blonde girl comes back in with paper towel and a plastic bag. She hands them to me, I make an attempt to raise an eyebrow questioningly. I fail and end up squishing my eyebrows together, a single tear overflows and runs down my face. She looks sympathetic for a moment "You just have to clean up half of it, then." I smile and take the bag – I'm used to cleaning up – I ran away into my own house as soon as I could and have been living there for a couple of months now and can still see the floor (Sort of) - I just thought she was going to try to strangle me with it.
I wipe donut crumbs into the bag and pretend not to be listening to their conversation.
"Hey Anna," That must be the blonde one's name, I should remember it. "I think he'd be perfect for the music videos; He could do tons of stunts like that" I nearly miss the bag. Music videos? What? Was I in the wrong building? Is that why Anna's nice and Amy's wearing that outfit? Or is that there real names and I don't know Anna's at all?
"Are you okay?" Anna asks, she sounds concerned. I knew it, ever sense I saw that opened door. It was all a scam. My heart hammers against my chest but I am frozen. Why did they want my money? When I was in debt up to my eyeballs until I won the competition? When I lived in a tent? A pink tent?
"I think we should have told him about the plan" the man judge whispers loudly, as if I couldn't hear. The plan to rob me of all my reward money! "Cedric, we were just about to tell him" Anna says, so Cedric must be the man judge's name, if he is the man judge. My head hurts from all the non – Draco learning stuff happening today. I have to get away from here, before they all start to attack me or something.
Amy walks over to me and pats me on the shoulder "It's okay Victor, we're just trying to be just as original as the other show; they were very surprised when they heard it was going to be the worst dancer that was going to win too" She gestures towards Anna and Cedric "But look at what a success it's been" she points at the rectangles "Now we're going to be the first television series ever to be told entirely in music videos!"
I'll be dancing. Dancing with Draco.
I think this may just be the best scam ever!
Time sent… 12:45
From: VictorandDracohugsandkisses 4ever
To:
Subject: READ THIS VERY IMPORTANT!
Hey, want to be a walk in or something on a music video? Draco will be there, but he's all mine so don't even think about it. Um… what can I say? I'm sorry I won? Because I'm not. Lol I'm having the time of my life here! The first one will be starting soon and all you have to do is stand there or shake slightly, whatever.
Hope to see you soon, Victor.
It's cold and dark outside, strange coloured lights and a glowing yellow McDonald's arch. I used to love it there. Being in this place though, it reminds me too much of home to be comforting. That's what my first thought was when I opened that sturdy mahogany door.
The bed must have been king sized (Or I hear that's what you call it – but I don't think king's were really THAT big, do you? How could they walk around?) but the beige sheets were still overflowing. The pillows were huge and full almost until it seemed to be busting, but at the same time soft. Then there's the chair, I can barely stand to look at it; it's almost an exact replica.
He had lean muscles he complained about every chance he'd get. But then he'd hop on a broomstick and travel for hours… It was confusing for me as a child and I never got why he wanted me to do it to – to become a quiditch player. He paid for a trainer like he once had and when I complained about her he'd just say to "man up"
Then he'd complain how terrible it was.
I didn't want to grow up like that; that's all I knew, before I watched my first episode.
I found it magical how the dancer's have never even trained hard for it, and Draco was the best at that; fumbling around the stage. He had this feeling to him like you'd think he didn't care how well he did or not and he used up the whole stage when he moved.
He was sitting in his chair when I told him that I wanted to leave. He just looked down on me with teary, disappointed eyes "…what?"
"I'm leaving" I mumbled again, the shame threatening to swallow me up. "I'm-I'm going to-" Now he looked angry. "You mean your throwing away all the training, all the money we put into your training."I couldn't meet his eyes so I stared down at my feet; I was wearing my special white sneakers with a thick black line that time I was going to write Draco's name on my sneakers but thought better of it. "You can make it! You have the experience!" He gave me them for my birthday one year "You can be great without making a fool of yourself on national television!" Did he read my mind or what? I never told him anything about my dream to go audition for that show. "That show" He pointed at the television "That is crap. You don't need that. You can be good" He was pleading now "You can be good"
But I had already made my decision "I'll be back" I promised, to myself and to him. I'll be back eventually I remember thinking. I look down at my sneakers – mud spattered on just about every surface it could find – but I could still see it, a thick black line from where I almost wrote Draco's name but thought better of it.
"You okay?"
I guess I don't look awe struck or something. The place has wires everywhere, a tall ceiling and cameras, cameras everywhere the eye could see. Which, I guess was sort of the point. There was a supersized green wall that doesn't lead to a room or anything but is just in the middle of it all.
"Where'd Draco go?" Paul prompts, he seems to be trying to get me to be happier, but he seems really nervous too. He called me up this morning to ask me where the studio was, that was it. The only reason I can think of him benefitting for this is from me putting in a good word for him;
"Oh yeah, Paul really makes everybody cheerful. Lights up a room." I confide to Frank, Draco walks in "Cheerful? I need to be cheerful more often… what's his phone number?"
And let's face that; no one would ever be looking for someone after they've got me.
The cameras are going to be ready soon and Draco and I are going to be dancing. Hopefully bad enough to please the viewers who are too embarrassed and have to watch it on YouTube. I picture teenagers holding IPhone's or laptops under their blankets at night with earphones in, the shaggy haired guy with pimples is frowning because the way I fell didn't look natural enough for him.
"So they didn't have you practice, like, at all?" he asks, I nod. People are rushing here and there and by the fuss they're making I'm guessing Draco's almost ready. "WHERE'S THE BODY GUARD?" One practically screeches while running with coffee that's sloshing onto the floor as she runs around. Could it be really be anybody but Draco?
"Did they give you a theme or…anything?" Paul asks, I finally turn towards him. He really does look nervous, almost afraid or something. "Theme?" I slur, my head feels so foggy this morning…
"Yeah" Paul says "Like happy or sad or love or hate….?" I think I get what he means now. I turn my head so I'm facing the way Draco may or may not me coming again.
"Or a song?" He says, I make to face him again, my eyelids are heavy and my eyes… I almost fall on the ground. It looks comfortable enough, I think, as I lower myself down and pat the almost rubbery feel to the black floor. "Good night" I say to it, before standing up again to watch doors that never seem to open.
"You didn't sleep much did you?" I think he means it to be rhetorical. Either that or he's stupider then a fly who missed the spider web and went back to try again. Either way I can't reply because that is the moment Draco strides out.
His blonde hair has been styled so one part's hanging in his face and the other is neatly combed to the side, he's wearing a green sweater unbuttoned to reveal a black t-shirt. At first, I am awe struck. Then I realize that my dreams of matching outfits have been shattered and thrown in the trash.
I adjust my yellow handbag, and stare at my baggy red pants, hoping I look as good as him.
"Get going!" Amy yells and I half run beside Draco, he would be absolutely perfect right now if his nose wasn't wrinkled like that. I should take a picture right now. "PAUL!" I yell, "YOU HAVE TO GO OVER WITH THE LOSERS!" I point at the crowd of the five former contestants waiting to do they're background dance. They grumble, Paul looks slightly shocked. I guess they're not too happy about the nickname I gave them. "I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT!" Draco suppresses laughter. I made him happy? I made him laugh! I should be insulting more often!
"Action" The camera guy yells and I slap him across the cheek. It leaves a red mark, there are tears in his blue eyes but not from laughter. He glances toward Frank, who gives him the thumbs up sign, when he turns back to me his face is almost apathetic, except for the resentment in his eyes.
The guilt is like a bunch of ants on the inside devouring me. Ants, Draco hates ants. It said so on his blog thing for So You Thought It Couldn't Get Worse. I shouldn't think about them, then. The feeling only increases.
"I'm sorry" I mumble, looking down at my feet, my hands are holding each other by my hip. I unfasten the clicky thing around the bag and take out a rose "Will you forgive me?" The little crowd that is there goes "Awe…." I have to wonder if they are now turning into a sitcom or if they're going to cut it out later. I look into his eyes, please work, please work, PLEASE work.
"Alright, Victor Krummy" He glares down at my flower with distaste and I know there I no way in a million years he is ever going to pick it up.
"Great!" The camera guy called, I jump; I almost forgot everyone was watching us. "Now Draco get out of the shot!" Draco walks away from the green wall. I smile at the cameras, huge black chunky things, the camera guy has his red sock's hat on backwards. I can feel everybody's eyes watching me now; I have to think of something where I won't be facing them.
Maybe facing all of them.
I wink and hold a finger above my head, then I twirl so everything's a colourful blur. My mother used to have a ballerina girl, not a real one, just a glass one in a box that played music and spun whenever it was opened. Now I knew what it felt like to be her. I shouldn't have opened that box so much, it feels like revenge when I fall on the hard, thinly covered with green plastic stuff, floor.
I close my eyes and lower my head to fall asleep. I'm tired. I shouldn't have written that email to Paul, at twelve. I'll blame that on him if they ask. They probably won't. "Great!" the camera guy yells, I think he really likes that word. " Now Draco go stand by him and look worried" I can hear him groan but hear his footsteps coming closer so he must be standing beside me and then I'm sure because his foot swings into my side. Stupid hard shoe, really, what does he have against me? Besides me slapping him? Didn't he already have his revenge when he called me Victor Krummy?
Maybe he meant it as a cute nickname! That's it! My mind sends me into a panic mode, my eyes fly open, my heart beating fast, "I love you too!" I cry, covering my eyes cleverly to hide the tears "I'm sorry"
Everybody runs in front of the green wall, Bessie's cracking her knuckles and glaring at me. Paul is shaking slightly, Voldermort's break dancing, and Snape is flinging his hair at people randomly. "DO SOMETHING, QUICK!" The camera man yells; is he always this bossy? I stand up and smile for the cameras, bending over slightly with one hand on my hip. I saw a model do this once. Suddenly something long and white is flying through the air, I duck but a part catches me shoulder. It feels like my bones have been crushed. I grab the thing, the anger – no, fury, rising up on me. I think of Draco kicking me and Bessie not liking me anymore and Paul trying to use me to get to Draco while I try to rip it apart. "Um…Victor?" It's Draco, the only reason I say something back at all "Huh?" "That's my skipping rope"