She stands there, petrified as his eyes flash from an ambery gold to the familiar brown that she knows in the dim light of the room. Every single nerve in her body is screaming at her to run. To get far, far away from him. Because he's dangerous. He's a threat to her. Somehow, she just knows this. There are alarms going off in her head with the word DANGER flashing in red.
She doesn't know if it's the fear that keeps her in place or if it's something else. There is a part of her- a very small part- that is captivated by his eyes. Not because of the inhuman color but because… he looks scared. The eyes that she sees aren't the eyes of a blood thirsty beast. They're the eyes of a frightened child. There's a desperation there. He doesn't look like he's about to hurt anyone even though she knows that he can. He looks innocent.
She sucks in a breath and lets it out slowly as when his eyes finally stop flashing and return back to their original chocolate brown color. She stands completely still has he slams his fist against the floor and lets his head drop, hiding his face from her view. Her skin continues to prickle, all her senses on high alert as he clumsily gets back onto his feet and pushes himself against the wall, breathing hard.
Caroline is sure that out of the two of them, Tyler is the one that looks more frightened. He's staring at Sarah's unmoving form on the floor, his face contorted with despair. She continues to watch him as he stares at Sarah's body, she's still too scared to move as his breathing becomes steadier and he begins to look a little bit calmer.
She isn't sure how long she stands there just watching him but she's sure that it isn't as long as it seems. As she stares at him however, something changes. The look on his face and the desperation in his voice seem so familiar to her and she doesn't understand why. As she watches him breathe with his back still pressed against the wall she begins to have more flashbacks.
She remembers herself slamming a nurse against the wall, remembers feeling the stretch of her skin as the veins began to manifest.
"You can't tell anyone!" she remembers ordering the nurse desperately.
She remembers the horror she had felt when she had seen her face changed for the first time, remember the sharp pain in her gums and the way that it had made her scream the first time her fangs had come out. She remembers the fear and humiliation she had gone through at the hospital when she kept wanting to drink blood; when the once nauseating smell of blood because so irresistibly delightful to her senses. She remembers wondering what the hell is happening to her, remembers how she felt so strong and so helpless at the same time.
She remembers wanting to bite into anyone and everyone. She remembers how she had lost control and drank that nameless boy's blood until he stopped moving, until his heart stopped beating, and how after he was dead, she had only craved more. She remembers the shame and the overwhelming guilt that had washed over her when she realized that she had actually killed someone. She remembers how she became a monster.
And as she stares at Tyler, she sees those same emotions flashing in his eyes. He has the same looks on his face.
And she knows.
She knows exactly what he's going through, knows exactly what he's feeling because just a few weeks ago, she had gone through the same thing. She's still going through it, still getting the hang of it. She looks at him and she sees a distorted version of herself. It's like looking in a mirror. Only instead of physical features, she sees her emotions right in front of her.
Caroline doesn't know anything about werewolves but she knows that Tyler's life has now changed forever. His physical features no longer show the signs of his lycanthropy but she knows that he knows. He's different now. Something in him has changed. She's seen it and she knows that he feels it because otherwise, he would not be staring at Sarah's dead body the way he is right now.
It's not his fault. That's all Caroline can think. It's not his fault and it isn't fair. He didn't mean to. It was an accident. She fell. It's not Tyler's fault that she tripped. Ok, so what if he pushed her. It was reflex. If someone came at you with knife, or a letter opener or any other sharp, pointy object and jammed it in your chest, you'd push that person away too. It's not fair! Don't do this to him! Don't let this happen to him.
"As long as Tyler doesn't kill anyone, he won't turn." Jeremy's voice echoes in her head, repeating the sentence over and over and over again.
It was Katherine! She compelled Matt and Sarah to attack Tyler! She was trying to force him into killing one of them. It's not his fault! This shouldn't count! It's not his fault!
She doesn't know who she's yelling at. She doesn't know if life or fate or whatever God or Gods are up there are listening or if they're just playing some messed up game with her and maybe with Tyler, too. Maybe higher power is just messing with all of them. She doesn't know and she doesn't care.
All her fear dissipates as she stares at him and her instinct to run turns into something else. All she wants to do is help him. Because no matter what might lie ahead for him, this is not his fault. The rest of the universe might blame him for Sarah's death but she will not. Because even though this might have triggered his curse- she knows she's in denial but she doesn't give a damn at the moment that it's obvious what has happened to him- she will always blame Katherine for this.
She wonders if Damon and Stefan have killed her yet. Wonders if she goes back upstairs and asks really nicely they'll let her stake the bitch herself. For ruining her life. For ruining Tyler's life. And Stefan's, and Elena's and even Damon's and for trying to kill Jenna and who knows how many other people she's used, killed and thrown away.
No.
It doesn't matter because what's done is done. What's important is the boy standing in front of her. He no longer sounds like he's having an asthma attack but he's still freaking out. Big time. She has to do something about this. She has to help him somehow.
Her muscles begin to work again and in two quick strides, she's standing in front of him.
"Tyler." Her voice is a little shaky, and she hears her own fear and despair because even though she knows what she wants to do, she actually has no idea how to actually do it. She's just winging it here but there's no one else around to help her.
"Tyler, look at me! You need to calm down!" she says as she grips his arms and gives him a slight shake in order to get his attention.
"She's dead." Tyler says shakily.
"I-I killed her! I killed her and you want me to calm down?" he says as he finally looks away from Sarah's prone form on the floor to stare into Caroline's eyes. She thinks she sees tiny specks of amber mix in with the brown but it's gone when she blinks.
"You-you didn't kill her. You didn't mean to! You just- it... it was an accident, okay? It's not your fault!" she's stuttering and her voice is shaking. She's scared again but this time, she's scared for him.
"Not my fault?" he exclaims, as his eyes bulge. His breathing has become labored again and she can hear his heart pounding. She can smell the warm blood rushing through his veins, can feel it pulsing through body underneath the expensive clothes. Not good. Too much blood. But she doesn't wanna leave him like this. Not when he's so scared and so, so alone. She has Stefan. There's no one around to help Tyler. His uncle's dead and as far as she knows, there aren't any other werewolves around.
"Come-come here." She says as she pulls him away from the wall and half drags him to the leather couch. She puts her hands on his shoulders and forces him to sit down. He makes no moves to resist her as she does this; his arms seem to have gone limp and the dangle slightly as she sits him down. She gets down on the floor in front of him and stands on her knees so that she can be eye level with him, keeping her hands on his shoulders.
"Tyler. Tyler, listen to me. Breathe, okay, breathe. Just calm down and breathe." He looks at her, panicked and she takes deep breathes while she squeezes his shoulders in an effort to calm him down. It doesn't seem to work though and he looks like he can't breathe. He begins to pull at his collar and yank on his tie as he takes in short, quick gasps of air. His hands are shaking.
"Here. Here, let me." She says as she bats his hands away and quickly undoes his tie, pulling it from around his neck in one quick tug, the tie is in her hands. He immediately begins to pull at his collar again and again, she pushes his hand away and undoes the first two buttons of his shirt. He's stopped bleeding she realizes. The strong smell of his blood is quickly diminishing back to the point where it doesn't make her have to fight the urge to lick his open wound. What seemed like a very deep stab is almost completely healed, she realizes. A human couldn't possibly heal that fast. But a werewolf certainly could.
"Tyler. Tyler, slow down. Deep breaths. Breathe slowly." She tells him, trying to control her own panic as she grips his shoulders again.
Eventually, he calms down. She stays there with him, standing on her knees in front of him and rubbing her hands up and down his arms as he takes deep breaths. They stay that way for a while and the only sound in the room is Tyler's deep breathing until Caroline hears a groan behind her.
Tyler's head snaps up, his eyes alert and somewhat fearful as Caroline slowly turns her head to look at who had made the sound.
They both watch as Matt rolls over on to his side and slowly stumbles to his feet. All the alcohol he'd been drinking all night seems to be taking its toll on him and he groans again as he stumbles and bumps into the wall when he gets up.
"Ugh, what happened?" he questions as he brings a hand to his head.
Caroline looks at him for a moment before she turns her head back to Tyler and gives his arm a small squeeze. He doesn't seem to notice it though. His eyes are locked on Matt. For a moment, Caroline worries that he'll blame Matt for this but Tyler doesn't look angry at all. Sadness and regret are written all over his face but he doesn't look the slightest bit angry. She squeezes his arm again, a little harder this time just to get some sort of reaction out of him but he doesn't look at her and gives no indication that she's there at all. Worry begins to bubble up in her again.
Matt turns around and his eyes land on the two of them.
"Guys? What's going on? What happened? Why is Sarah on the floor?" He asks after he looks around the room.
It's then that Tyler finally looks at Caroline again, his eyes asking her how he's supposed to tell Matt that he's just killed someone.
Caroline's lips press together in a thin line as she lets out a small huff through her nose.
He wants to tell Matt that he's just killed someone? Well, too bad. That's not going to happen. She is not going to paint him as some kind of murderer. And she's not going to let him do that to himself either. He's the victim here. So is Matt. So is Sarah. Well, so was Sarah, Caroline thinks sadly. It's Katherine that's the killer, not Tyler. She's not going to let that bitch ruin his life. Well, no more than she already has.
She squeezes Tyler's arm one more time and gives him a reassuring look as she stands up. He acknowledges her this time and watches her as she walks up to Matt.
Matt stares at her in confusion when she comes to stop in front of him and she can see the grim look on her face reflected in his eyes.
"Care?" he questions slowly, he smells like alcohol and blood.
"What's going on?" he asks again as his hand comes up to his face.
"And what is this…" he stops as he pulls his hand away from his face and stares at the blood on his fingers. He's stopped bleeding and most of the blood has dried up above his lips.
"What the hell?" he questions as he looks at his hand in confusion.
"What happened? What's going on here, you guys? What's wrong with Sarah?" he asks again.
Caroline turns her head slightly to glance at Tyler and she sees him look down at the floor with guilty eyes as he clasps his hands together in front of him.
"Sarah…hit her head." Caroline finally responds to Matt's questions. She has to get him out of here. She doesn't want him to know anything. It'll only put him in danger and he's been in more than enough danger tonight. He's the one that was supposed to die tonight. Sarah was just the back up. A small part of Caroline wants to know why in the world Katherine would want to trigger Tyler's curse but in the face of her current situation, the questions seems trivial.
"Well then, we should call a doctor. She might have a concussion or something-" he begins but Caroline cuts him off.
"She doesn't have a concussion." Caroline says softly.
"But she's unconscious! We have to help her-" Matt begins as panic and worry make their way into his voice but Caroline cuts him off again.
"She's not unconscious, Matt." Caroline says in an even smaller voice as she turns after Matt, purposely not looking at Sarah's fallen form on the floor in front of her. She watches as Tyler puts his head in his hands. He looks like he's got the weight of the world on his shoulders.
Matt turns to look at her and gives her a look that says what-the-fuck before he quickly turns his attention to Tyler.
"We were fighting…" He begins slowly, causing Tyler to slowly look up at him.
"We were fighting and I hit my head…" he says as Tyler watches him, saying nothing. Matt's waiting for Tyler to respond but Tyler says nothing. His lips stay pressed together in a thin line and he still looks like he's got something very heavy on his shoulders.
"What happened after that?" Matt questions when Tyler continues to stay silent. At this, Tyler looks away from Matt and turns his head to look at Sarah's body once again. The sound of his breathing doesn't fill the room anymore. He is completely silent.
"Will one of you please tell me what's going on?" Matt asks, agitation filling his voice as he turns his attention back to Caroline.
Caroline spots a tissue box on a shelf and walked over to it. She grabbed a few tissues out of the box and quickly walks back over to Matt as she balls the tissues up in her hand. When she gets to him, she holds her breath and begins to dab at the blood beneath his nose, being careful not to get any on her fingers as he looks at her in confusion. When he realizes that she isn't going to answer his question, he slaps her hand away from his face.
"Care, what the hell!" he demands as he brought his arm up and wiped away the little blood that remained on his face. Caroline lowers the arm that Matt has just swatted away and she slowly walks over to the trash bin by the book case and let the half bloody ball of tissue fall into the cluster of crumpled papers below as Matt begins to speak again.
"Shouldn't you be more worried about Sarah? She's passed out on the floor, we should wake her up. If she hit her head, then-"
"She doesn't need a doctor Matt."
"Caroline-" Matt begins, sounding extremely annoyed.
"She's dead, Matt." It's Tyler who interrupts this time.
Something sinks in the pit of Caroline's stomach as she turns her head to Tyler slowly. Matt's head whips around to gape at Tyler.
"What?"
Tyler opens his mouth but then he closes it again and looks back at Sarah.
"What do you mean, she's dead? You guys, this isn't funny." Matt says as he begins to walk over to Sarah but he stumbles and has to grab the back of the couch to steady himself.
"I must be dreaming." He says as he tries to stand without the help of the couch but he wobbles slightly.
Caroline decides that she has had enough as she watches Matt try to walk toward Sarah and while Tyler watches Matt with a look of despair on his face.
She walks over to Matt and curls her fingers around his arm.
"Matt, come on. Come with me." He doesn't seem to remember how he'd gotten knocked out and that's a good thing. The less people that actually know about what happened here, the better.
"No." Matt says as he weakly tries to pull out of her grasp and go to Sarah but then he suddenly stops. Then he turns around and bolts for the waste basket. He falls to his knees in a few quick strides and pulls it toward him and under his chin before he vomits into it.
Caroline and Tyler look at each other. Tyler breaks the gaze first and then Caroline makes her way over to Matt and rubs his back until he stops retching and then she pulls him back up onto his feet. He looks like he's on the verge of passing out as he stands completely still with drooping eyes. She decides that it would be best to get him out of here before anything else.
"Come on, Matt." She says again and this time, he complies. He seems to be half asleep already as she leads him to the door.
"Tyler." She says softly, afraid that if she speaks too loudly someone will overhear and figure everything out. He lifts his head out of his hands and looks at her with wide eyes that look completely lost and her heart aches. It just isn't fair.
He's blaming himself. He shouldn't be. It's not his fault. She wants to tell him everything but she isn't sure that's the best idea. Plus, she wouldn't even know where to begin.
Stefan. Stefan would know what to do. She needs to talk to Stefan. He'll know how to fix this. He'll be able to help Tyler after all, he had saved her and helped her when her world was spinning faster than the speed of light and crashing down all around her. She wonders if he's still here. But even if he is, he'll probably want to be with Elena tonight. She's on her own at the moment.
"I'll be right back, okay. Don't go anywhere and I'll…" She'll what? What the hell is she going to do? How is she supposed to handle this messed up situation?
"I'll take care of this." She catches the look of utter confusion on Tyler's face but she doesn't stay to hear his response as she feels Matt's weight pressing against her. She takes him outside and lays him down in the back seat of her car, doing her best to make him as comfortable as can be on a car seat. He's already asleep before she even shuts the door.
She turns around and lets out a heavy sigh as she leans against her car. What is she going to do? What's going to happen to Tyler now? How's he gonna react when he find out about Katherine and her and Stefan and Damon and Mason? Oh god, Mason. He's going to freak out. He'll never understand. He'll never calm down enough to listen to them explain so that he can understand. How do you accept the fact that your family's been murdered for a just cause. If it can be called just. From the little that she's been told about Damon and Mason's spat, Damon was the one that started it. She isn't sure why and at the moment, she doesn't care. All she knows is that Tyler's suddenly become the new werewolf in town and she is not happy about it. And she's sure that Damon isn't going to be too thrilled about it either.
Think, think, she had to think! People can't find out about this. Tyler can't tell anyone about his curse. If the Council finds out about werewolves, they'll just start asking more questions and those questions will lead to more investigations and besides, Mrs. Lockwood is not going to just be able to accept the fact that her son turns into a wolf once a month without having some kind of panic attack. Caroline remembers all too well the way her mother hadn't even been able to look at her when she had found out that Caroline was a vampire. It is one of the most horrible things she's ever felt. She doesn't want that to happen to Tyler. She doesn't want him to go through that. She doesn't want him to feel the way she did.
She takes in a deep breath and lets it out slowly. She knows what she has to do. She just hopes that she will be able to pull it off.
As Caroline walks back into the house, she realizes that most of the guests have left already. There are a few people mingling in corners but they've pulled their masks off and have become half lidded with sleep and drunkenness and in some cases, lust. How long had they been in there? The house had been full of people when Caroline had first heard Matt and Tyler fighting.
After walking around the house for a little while, Caroline finally finds Mrs. Lockwood saying goodbye to some guests at the front door. She smiles as Caroline walks up to her.
"Caroline, sweetheart, you look beautiful! I'm so glad I didn't miss you on your way out. Did you enjoy the party?"
A small smile tugs at the corners of Caroline's lips at the warm hearted compliment but she's too nervous to be her usual preppy self and the mayor quickly notices this.
"Honey, is something wrong?" she asks as Caroline comes to a stop in front of her.
"I…" Caroline trails off. She has no idea how to go about this but she knows she has to think quickly otherwise, she'll give something away.
"It's Sarah. I don't know what happened. She-she hit her head or something and she wouldn't wake up and now-" Caroline doesn't have to work very hard to make her voice sound frightened. She's genuinely scared but not for the reason that she's giving to the woman in front of her.
"Slow down. Where is she?" Mrs. Lockwood asks and Caroline leads her to the study where they both find Tyler in the exact same position he had been in when she had left. He's sitting on the sofa with his head in his hands.
"Tyler?" Mrs. Lockwood asks and Tyler's head snaps up. He's quickly on his feet.
"Mom, I-" he begins but she cuts him off as she kneels next to Sarah.
"What happened?" she asks as she tries to gently shake Sarah into wakefulness not realizing that she's not passed out. She turns her head back to look at Tyler.
"You know you're not supposed to be in here." She says and there's a hint of anger in her voice.
"I know. I'm sorry but this is more important. Sarah-" he begins.
"It was my fault!" Caroline interrupts suddenly, not wanting Tyler to tell his mother anything about his curse.
The mother and son both look at her in surprise.
Caroline opens her mouth as she tries to make up something believable that won't make Tyler seem suspect.
"I…I was having an argument with Matt and-and Tyler didn't want us to make a scene in front of all the other guests so he brought us in here because we were yelling at each other and he was just trying to calm us both down and then Sarah heard us fighting so she came in but she was drinking. We-we weren't paying that much attention to her and then Matt walked out and we were about to go after him but then Sarah fell and she wouldn't answer us when we asked her if she was ok and then we couldn't get her to wake up and then we realized…" Caroline trails off as she looks at Sarah hoping that she's succeeding in making herself look distressed.
Mrs. Lockwood's confused look turns to one of dread as she kneels down next to Sarah again.
"Oh, my god." she whispers as she presses her fingers to Sarah's neck.
"Oh, no." she says as she pulls her hand away from Sarah neck and covers her mouth. Caroline looks away from her to look at Tyler and she sees that he's looking back at her with a look that asks what-the-hell are-you-doing? His face is a mixture of confusion, dread and apprehension but he doesn't look at all relieved about her lie. He just looks confused. And scared but most confused.
Caroline hopes he won't speak up as his mother turns around wringing her hands together.
"Okay. Okay, I…I have to call the sheriff. I- I'll be right back." It's the first time that Caroline's ever seen her look so nervous. Both teens say nothing as the older woman quickly walks out of the room.
"Listen," Caroline begins as soon as she's sure that Mrs. Lockwood is out of earshot.
"Just…just go with me ok? Let me handle this. I promise you won't get in any trouble and it'll be ok and-"
"When in the hell would you wanna handle this?" Tyler interrupts look at her like she's crazy. And it's then that Caroline realizes that while she knows what's just happened to him, he has no clue what she is or why she's doing this. For the most part, he's completely clueless. Caroline isn't sure if this is a good or a bad thing. She sucks in a breath and quickly lets it out.
"Please, Tyler." She says as she takes a step closer to him and reaches out for him.
"I…I know that this all seems really confusing right now but please, just trust me." She says as she gently wraps her fingers around his wrist and gives him a quick squeeze. He looks down at her hand on his wrist looking even more confused and also a little bit uncomfortable. She pulls her hand back and he looks up at her face. He's about to speak when his mother walks back into the room.
'Tyler, I need you to go outside and wait for the sheriff." She says as she walks back in.
Tyler opens his mouth and looks like he's about to say no but his mother doesn't give him the chance.
"Now." She orders and something in the tone of her voice makes Caroline feel a little bit scared.
Tyler closes his mouth and with one last nervous look at Caroline, he walks out of the room.
With a sigh, Mrs. Lockwood walks up to Caroline and speaks in a gentler tone.
"Caroline, tell me what happened." She says gently. She doesn't seem angry but she does look extremely distressed. She looks nervous and even a little bit scared. Caroline feels bad for her. She's had a rough few months and she feels bad that she's lying to this woman because Caroline likes Mrs. Lockwood a lot. Still, it'll probably be less stressful for her to think that this was just some freak accident rather than find out that her son is cursed and that he accidently killed this girl.
Caroline begins to ramble as she tries to make up a story that won't sound too farfetched. It doesn't really seem like Mrs. Lockwood is going to ask her too many questions however. She just looks really worried.
"Matt and I were fight. We broke up, you know, and Sarah was drunk and dancing and she-she just tripped. Then she wasn't breathing." Caroline says hoping that she looks believable.
"Okay, well, your mom's on her way and- and we called Sarah's parents. It was an accident. It was a terrible, tragic accident."
Caroline nods quickly as the mayor tries to console Caroline and herself because this is a complete disaster.
"Mom." They both turn to Tyler. Caroline had heard him come in. He had listened to the end of the story before making his presence known.
"The sheriff's here." He says and Mrs. Lockwood sighs as she looks at Sarah again before she begins to walk away.
"I'll go prepare her just don't leave. Just stay here, okay? She's going to wanna hear the story from you." She says to Caroline and after one quick look at Tyler, she leaves.
Tyler shots Caroline a look and Caroline find herself looking down and then back up at him. She's nervous. He hasn't said anything since she asked him to let her handle this. It seems that he's going with it as she asked. He walks past her into the room and Caroline finds herself wanting to do something to make him calmer.
He isn't hyperventilating anymore and he's stopped bleeding completely. She knows that he's fully healed but she's sure that his head is spinning. She can see the tenseness in his shoulders as he walks past her and the turmoil in his eyes.
He's stuck with this now and there's nothing she can do to change it. She sighs and then she turns around to see him looking over Sarah's body.
"Matt's in the car, sleeping it off." She begins and he turns his head and looks at her as she continues.
"I'll deal with him I… don't want him involved in any of this."
He walks up to her then.
"What are you doing?" he asks her, his voice almost a whisper.
Isn't it obvious to him by now?
"I'm… fixing a very bad situation." She responds, hoping he won't suddenly decide to tell they parents the truth.
"Why? I did this. I killed her."
"No!" she says immediately, still hating the fact that he's somehow managed to get tangled up in the mess that Katherine has created.
"You didn't mean to. And I think it's best for everyone-"she says as she looks into his eyes, relieved that they're completely brown.
"But she's dead! You don't know what that means." He says with a shake of his head.
He really doesn't know anything Caroline realizes. It only makes him seem like more of a victim in her eyes. He's still blaming himself and Caroline knows that he's going to go on blaming himself because accident or no, you can't just kill someone and never think about it again. She knows that all too well but she isn't going to let this define him. It's not his fault. He's had more than enough for one night though and she isn't going to explain to him how and why she knows what she knows but at the same time she wants him to understand that she gets what he going through. She knows exactly what all of this means for him.
"Actually, Tyler, I think I do."
He just shakes his head.
"No, you don't, Caroline."
She looks at his chest where her sharp eyes can make out the dark outline of the blood on his jacket.
"Has your wound healed?" she asks with a nod towards his chest.
It's then that Tyler seems to remember that he'd been wounded. He looks down at his chest and she watches as he undoes a few more buttons to look at the place where Sarah had stabbed him. His brow furrows and he reaches his hand into his shirt and Caroline already knows that there's no trace of the stab left on his skin. Tyler looks up at her in awe.
"How did you…" he trails off. She says nothing. Just stares at him and gives him a look that says that she knows. He is no longer looking at her as if she doesn't understand. His look of confusion is back but there's something else in his eyes. Maybe now, he'll trust her. Caroline hopes that it's enough. She hopes that he'll believe that she will keep this secret.
He's about to speak again when the Sheriff suddenly hurries in.
"Caroline!" They both turn their heads as Liz almost runs to her daughter and grips her arms with Mrs. Lockwood coming into the room right behind her.
"Are you alright? What happened here?"
"Mom!" Caroline says holding her hands up as she tries to reassure her mother.
"I'm fine. It's Sarah. She hit her head and something happened to her."
Caroline repeats the story she had told Mrs. Lockwood to her mother as Tyler stands behind her. The entire time she's talking, she can feel his eyes burning into her back. She knows that she should tell him more. He deserves the truth but it can wait. He's had more than enough for one night.
She leaves after her mother is done taking her statement and she's out the door before Tyler has a chance to say anything to her.
There's a heaviness in her chest as she drives Matt home. She replays the events of tonight over and over again in hear head, hating that she hadn't been able to stop Sarah, hating that one of them hadn't thought to keep an eye on Tyler just in case.
Caroline digs Matt's keys out of his pocket and lets them both into the house. She tries to leave after Matt is tucked snugly in his own bed and sleeping soundly but there's something else that's weighing down on her.
"Matt failed. And if Matt fails, I can't."
It was supposed to be Matt. Matt was the one that was supposed to die tonight. Caroline feels tears prick her eyes as she gently strokes his face. He looks so peaceful and handsome as he sleeps. TO think she almost lost him tonight. She shuts her eyes tightly as she remembers the way he had looked under Katherine's compulsion, his face twisted into something angry and hell bent.
She knows that she shouldn't be here but she can't bring herself to leave. She misses him so much. She's not going to get a chance to be with him like this again. She loves him too much to risk being with him. She still remembers the delicious taste of his blood and the sudden desire that erupts in her scares her. Just thinking about it makes her mouth water. She wants to bite him.
No. She pushes the urge down and strokes his face one more time. There's something she has to say to him and she knows that he's asleep and he won't hear it but she doesn't want him to hear it. She just needs to say it.
"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you like this. I swear, I never meant to. I never wanted any of this to happen. I wanted to be with you. I still do but I can't handle the thought that I might hurt you. Because there's a part of me that wants to. I'm sorry, Matt. This is for your own good. Just know that I love you. I love you so much."
She feels tears sting her eyes but she shuts her eyes tightly in an attempt to keep them from falling. She can't cry. He's not hers anymore and she needs to let him go. But she doesn't want to. She wants to curl up next to him and fall asleep. But she can't do that either. No matter how much she might want to. It's not safe for him and she loves him too much to put him in any kind of danger. And she's dangerous. So instead of laying down next to him, she stokes his face one more time before she gets out of his house as fast as she can.
By the time she gets home, she's managed to push thoughts of Matt to the back of her mind. She wants to call Stefan. She has no idea what she's supposed to do about this. Katherine's out of the picture so Matt is safe but what about Tyler. He's a werewolf now. What's going to happen now? Are they going to help him? How are they supposed to help him? Does he even need help? She knows that she needed help.
She debates calling Stefan as she changes into her pajamas and she twirls her phone around in her hands. He's probably with Elena. She decides not to bother them tonight. They deserve a break after everything they've been dealing with. She decides that she'll call Stefan in the morning and buries herself under her covers, eventually falling into a fitful slumber.