A/N : Wow! Thanks for the reviews! Since this is my first story that I've put on it's great to see it's liked: (what a confidence booster, unlike Derek!) So yeah. Keep 'em coming! Anyways, here's another chapter to enjoy and indulge upon… mhmm, this is making me want chocolate.

Happy Passover to everyone who celebrates !

Disclaimer : I don't own any of the characters featured in this story (they're ABCs). If I did, god knows, we'd have all the Merder & Addex screentime available (aka the whole show) :

XXX

I love ferry boats. I love their shape, their size. I love the way the wind whips through my hair. But mostly, I love the peace. It's the only time I get that calm, serene feeling, like there's nothing else in the world. I'm a neurosurgeon, what did I expect? Hectic work hours, intense surgeries where a person's LIFE is in my hands, the death thing. Then, there's my family. I won't even begin to cover them.

Like I said, ferry boats are my oasis.

And yet, standing here with the wind catching grip of my locks, I'm the farthest thing from peace. I'm a mess. All I can think about is her.

Meredith, Meredith, Meredith.

I love everything about this woman. My love for her… god, it even beats the ferry boats. That's saying something. Everything about her, the way her wispy bangs hang over her forehead. That smile that I don't see very often, but when I do, it just lights up the world, my world. The way my name rolls of her tongue. I even love her when she's dark and twisty, because that's who she is, and she's my Meredith.

Damn, I'm pathetic. Here I am, the top neurosurgeon in the country, and I'm just standing here on a ferry boat, my PEACEFUL spot, thinking about her.

Does she love me anymore? Maybe I don't want the answer.

I'm trying to think of the last time we had sex. It was like our last kiss. Good, but not good enough, as if we thought we'd be doing it the rest of our lives. I guess things just didn't work out that way. God, I wish they had.

Meredith, Meredith, Meredith.

The condom was one of those glow-in-the-dark ones, I think. We even bypassed the foreplay to get right to the good stuff. Stupid Derek. Stupid. I miss the way she manipulated her mouth around my stubble, kissing in places that would make my mother faint.

If I could just get her back. I want her, no, I need her. She's the one who can make it all better. The one who can drag me, Derek Shepherd, across the country, to Seattle.

I love her in that really big way she talked about. I'll give her the last slice of the cheesecake. Damn, I'd give her the whole cheesecake if it would make her happy. Oh, and I'll be whatever she needs whenever. Music, clothes, whatever. I'd stand outside her window in the pouring Seattle rain, electrocuting myself with her dinky little boom box radio.

All for her.

And now, my ferry has reached its destination. No more peace.

Just my hectic life again.