Well, I'm finally back. It's been a while, and I'm sorry, but I didn't know what too right. Sorry if this seems a little rushed, but I really wanted to get it up here.
It's mainly about Sarah and her relationship with Ed. Enjoy XD
There are many awful, terrible things in life and most of them are seemingly in-existent as a child. And if they are existent, they are such a simple part of everyday life that they cease to be considered awful or terrible.
Sarah knew there were bad things out there; she wasn't stupid. But sometimes she felt as though the worst thing in the world was herself. She was a monster, at times. She was a monster to the one person who loved her the most.
She had been a brat when she was a child; some would say that she still was. She was spoilt, demanding and quick to anger. She was a suck up, a great friend, and a rotten sister.
Perhaps the first time she realised just how bad she was, was on her twelfth birthday.
"Ed!" she screamed down the stairs and into the basement, the residence of her fifteen year old brother. She heard a loud sigh and the heavy thud of feet as Ed trudged up the stairs.
"Yes, Sarah?"
"Did you eat my cupcake? My special birthday cupcake?"
"No," said Ed, shaking his head, "I didn't."
His eyes weren't focused as usual, giving him that classic dopey look. Sarah hated that look. It made him look so stupid. Why did her brother have to be so stupid? Couldn't she have a smart brother like Double D or Jimmy? Well, Jimmy, at least. Double D might have been smart and cute, but he was also annoying.
"Well, go find it then. It was on the bench." she ordered. Ed nodded miserably and shuffled off to find Sarah's cupcake. He had probably eaten it already, anyway.
"Oh yeah," she added as an afterthought, "Mum wants you to clean my room."
Sarah went back to flipping through the magazine's that were on the table. Soon Jimmy showed up and joined her, and they both giggled at all the bad clothes and gasped in wonder at all the good ones.
Her mood turned sour when her brother's friends turned up. Double D and Eddy were both fourteen, several months younger than the largest of the three, although amazingly more clever. Sarah would consider Eddy more devious than clever, though.
"Where's Ed?" Eddy snarled at Sarah. He was still so ridiculously short, yet didn't seem to realise it. He honestly thought he was superior to Sarah, which really annoyed her.
"Doing my chores," said Sarah, "and it's my birthday, so you better leave... NOW!"
"You're not the boss of me," Eddy said, crossing his arms, grinning purely to spite her, "and I'm not leaving." Anger built up inside Sarah. Double D looked apprehensive.
"Get OUT!" Sarah screamed, her face growing rapidly red. Eddy just looked at her.
"Why should I?"
"Sarah!" Ed bounced into the living room, covered in dirt and scratches, carrying a cupcake aloft in his hands. "I found your cupcake! Wilfred had it, the naughty boy!"
"Why aren't you in my room, cleaning?" asked Sarah, snatching the cupcake away from her brother. Ed looked confused and hurt... Why did he always look like that? It wasn't Sarah's fault he was an idiot.
"Okay, baby sister," he said, his frown changing swiftly to a grin. He hurried off.
"Ed!" protested Eddy, following after him, "Wait up!" Double D looked a little concerned.
"Shouldn't you be cleaning your own room, Sarah?" he asked. Normally Sarah would have screamed at anyone who asked her such a pointless question, but Double D sounded so calm and curious, that Sarah would have felt it rude.
"It's my birthday."
"Sarah, your birthday was yesterday," Double D corrected sternly. Sarah scowled.
"I'm younger than Ed. He has to do some work, you know."
"From what I've seen, Ed does all the work," said Double D, "he was doing chores back when he was only six. You're double that age, Sarah, yet you've never even lifted a finger. Don't you think you treat poor Ed a little harshly?"
Sarah brushed the comment off, but Double D's words stung. They stayed at the forefront of her mind all day, and nothing she did would clear her head. At first she denied it to herself, but she soon came to realise that everything that Double D had said was true.
She lay in bed that night, rolling over and squashing her face into her pillow, desperately trying to rid herself of the guilt that was hanging over her. Why was she feeling guilty now? Sure, Double D might have had some sort of point there... but really, none of her other friends did chores. Jimmy didn't.
'Jimmy is spoilt rotten, Sarah, and you know it,' said a snarky voice in her head, 'you often envy the marvellous toys he's given. It makes sense that he wouldn't have to attend to anything. Jimmy's never done a chore in his life, and with the amount of inheritance he'll be earning, I'll bet he'll never have too.'
She scowled into the darkness, but for once this wasn't a fight she could win by screaming, crying or calling for her Mum. She was questioning herself, and that frustrated her until she fell into a fitful sleep.
She thought everything might be better in the morning. It wasn't. If anything, things got worse. She couldn't bring herself to look at Ed in the morning, and instead left for school as soon as she could. For the next few weeks she tried her best to avoid Ed and his friends, even more so than usual. She couldn't bring herself to look at Ed's sad, hurt face or meet Double D's disappointed gaze. And as per usual, she just didn't want to be near Eddy in general. There was really not one thing about that boy that Sarah liked.
He wasn't even a good friend to Ed!
He's better than you.
I'm his sister, Sarah tried to persuade herself, it's not meant to work like that. Siblings aren't meant to get along. It isn't meant to work like that.
Is it, though? Look around you, Sarah. Sure, this school is small, but there are many siblings here. They don't treat each other like you treat Ed. Sisters don't loathe their brothers. People like Ed would be loved in another family, don't you think? Sure, he's stupid, but he's kind; and unconditionally forgiving, loyal and loving. What are you, Sarah, but a spoilt, ungracious brat?
Sarah wasn't one for being paranoid, but as the days flew past, she drew more and more into herself. She bit her tongue whenever she spoke out, and even if she did, afterwards she would analyse the situation from all angles. Her usual interactions with fellow classmates became like navigating through a live mine field. What did that frown mean? What did she really think of that?
Her guilt continued to build up instead of disperse. The usual movies she watched with Jimmy seemed distorted. It was the usual stereotypical nonsense; a hated kid outsmarted the popular kid, who everyone loved, but was actually a snobby, insolent little brat. Everyone eventually came to see the light and the popular kid became the hated one.
Sarah paid close attention to the bratty child. Was that her? Was she the mean, spoilt child that was not really worth liking?
Jimmy noticed her occasional vague-outs as she pondered this and eventually she spilled her doubts to him. He initially told her that she was nice, a great friend, until he realised that that simply wouldn't work.
"Do not fear, Sarah," he said, pulling out a white board and a marker, "for I, Jimmy, have found a solution for this problem." He drew a toilet cubicle on the board, "In girls' bathrooms, it is customary to write ones thoughts and gossip on the inside of the doors, is it not?"
"I guess," agreed Sarah, although she wasn't sure where Jimmy was going with this.
"Well, then, the idea is to trick people into writing their opinions of you. You write something along the lines of 'well, isn't Sarah a meanie-pants?' and see what people write underneath it."
"That's a brilliant plan, Jimmy," Sarah praised, instantly loving the idea.
"Isn't it?" said Jimmy proudly.
Sometimes Jimmy came up with the best ideas. That, or Sarah had let him watch too many chick flicks.
When Sarah actually got to the cubicle and withdrew a permanent marker, she decided to go for a better approach than "meanie pants" like Jimmy had suggested.
'Isn't Sarah Rowe such a spoilt brat? I mean, what a bitch, right?'
It made her stomach twist to write this, but she deemed it necessary.
As the days passed, the number of replies grew and grew. Sarah never contributed to it again, but she always went back to read.
Let's just say that it was a mixed bag. There were a few nice replies, saying that Sarah is super nice! How could you say that? But most weren't so supportive.
The harsh words weighed down on her, and it was one Friday that she was walking home, her bag slung over her shoulder, her head drooped. She felt like crying. Really, she did, but she wasn't ten anymore. She could cope. She had to cope.
"Sarah," said a voice, and Double D appeared on the path behind her.
"Hey, Double D," Sarah said quietly, shuffling her feet. She felt annoyed at both herself and at Double D for turning up. She didn't want to talk to him. She was feeling guilty enough as it was.
"Sarah," said Double D again, "are you feeling okay? You've seemed very upset lately."
"I'm okay, thanks, Double D," said Sarah, brushing a strand of orange hair off her face. Double D looked a little crest-fallen.
"Oh, okay," he said, "I was just checking."
"Yeah, thanks, Double D," said Sarah with a sigh. Sarah could hear Eddy and Ed in the distance behind them, but Double D continued to walk by her side. Perhaps he thought she needed the silent comfort, or perhaps he'd had enough of his friends for one day; Sarah wasn't sure which, but it made her feel better, at least.
That night she lay on her bed, glaring moodily at the roof. Why was it so cold in her room? She crossed her arms and scowled. Eventually, feeling restless, she rolled off her bed and stood. The house was silent for once. There was no harsh voice to be heard, as there usually was. It was strange, actually; usually at this time her Mum or Dad would be berating Ed for something Sarah had blamed on him or something he and his stupid friends had done. Or perhaps Ed would be in one of his moods and pretend that he was in one of his stupid comic books, and his voice would boom up from the basement. Or Sarah would take it upon herself to scream at him.
Sarah's house was never silent.
It was scary.
Sarah walked out into the living room and saw that her parents were nowhere to be seen. A note lay on the kitchen counter. They'd gone out, had they? Well, that explained it.
Sarah bit her lip as she slowly descended the steps down to Ed's room. He was there, right? She'd heard him come home, but after that, there had been only silence.
Sarah knocked on his door slowly and then pushed it open. The stench immediately hit her and she let out a gasp.
"Sarah?" asked Ed, looking up from what had been occupying him. He was sitting on his bed, several pieces of paper scattered around him. A pen was in his hand, and by the look of it, he had been writing away furiously. Sarah stepped slowly around the random objects that scattered her brother's bedroom floor and made her way over to his bed.
"Hey Ed," she said, "Mum and Dad went out."
Ed stared at her for a moment, as if he were confused.
"Yes, but what are you doing in my room?" he couldn't work it out himself so he just asked it. "Was I making too much noise?"
"No," said Sarah, "No, Ed, you weren't making any noise." Ed cocked his head to the side.
"And... Is that a problem, Sarah?"
"No, Ed, it is fine... what are you doing?"
Ed was suddenly overcome with a great enthusiasm.
"Oh, I'm writing a story, Sarah. My English teacher said I should, and so I've written one about the brave adventurer King Neglifie and his band of rebel mutant warriors-" Ed continued talking but Sarah didn't take his words in. She just smiled and nodded, pretending she was listening.
It occurred to Sarah that it was much colder down here in the basement rather than upstairs. Did Ed like it here in the basement? Sure, he got his own bathroom, but it sort of scared Sarah at times. When it was dark, there was only the smallest of windows for Ed to look out of. But then, Ed wasn't scared of much, and when he was it was always ridiculous.
Eventually Ed's chattering faded to a halt and he looked inquiringly at his sister.
"That'll be good, Ed," said Sarah, "but there's something I wanted to ask you."
"Ask away, Sarah, ask away," instructed Ed, spinning the pen in his fingers and looking sort of wise for once. Sarah sat down on the edge of Ed's bed and felt tears come to her eyes again. The question that had been eating away at her for the past month finally spilled out.
"Am I a good person, Ed?" Sarah asked. It was Ed's shocked look that caused her to burst into tears.
"Of course, Sarah! You're the best little sister in the whole world!" he looked at her sadly and moved closer to give her a hug, "It is me who is the bad brother."
"No," choked Sarah, moving to look at Ed, "No, Ed, you're a really good brother." And it was true; Ed was a great brother. He was always there. Whenever Sarah was hurt, or being threatened, Ed was there to save her. Even though most of the time she didn't want saving.
He was always there.
Sarah smiled as she hugged her big brother, and she truly realised what it was like to have a brother like Ed. He was stupid, yes, but she loved him for it. And for whatever reason, Ed loved her too.
And although Ed hadn't really answered her question... she felt better.
For that one, shining moment, she did feel like the best little sister ever.
Years later, when she was wiser and had seen more of the world, she truly appreciated Ed. She knew that he'd gotten the short end of the stick in her family. One brief thought she'd had in her childhood always sprung to mind;
People like Ed would be loved in another family, don't you think?
Perhaps her subconscious had brought it to mind, or perhaps it was simply irrelevant to the way Ed had usually been treated. Her parents weren't bad people, but neither was Ed. In fact, he was probably one of the best people Sarah had ever known. Even though she didn't see Ed anymore, she often thought back to that moment when she was twelve.
Despite the fact that the world was full of many bad things, she smiled; because she knew she wasn't one of those bad things.
Because, for that one moment, to Ed, she was the best sister in the world.
Sometimes, she thought that was the only thing that mattered.
To the outside world, we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other's hearts. We share private family jokes. We remember family feuds and secrets, family grief's and joys. We live outside the touch of time. - Clara Ortega
I put a little quote there :) it doesn't exactly relate, but it's a good quote and very sweet.
Hopefully you liked this about Sarah. I didn't want to portray her as a bad person exactly, but she isn't the best person in the show either. Also, I always took Ed's relationship with his parents as not the best one.
Review and tell me what you think. Again, I'll take suggestions. I'm thinking of doing a one-shot on the Ed's friendship next.