Disclaimer: I do not own Fire Emblem 7
I should note, that in this fanfic Eliwood's army fought Jerme, not Kenneth. And with how devoted he is, I didn't think there was any need to Morph him. He'd fight for Nergal as a human, no need for Nergal to kill him.
Huzzah for the end of the school year for me! And I survived Math! Woohoo!
Chapter 2
Useless
Renault woke with the sunrise, as he was accustomed to. Century old habits were hard to break.
He left the tent he'd been assigned to with his only possessions, his clothes, staff and spell book. Silently saying the prayers he was used to saying every day, he watched the sunrise.
"Pardon me. You are an Eliminean bishop, are you not?" came a quiet voice from behind him.
Renault spun on the spot and instinctively tensed. Seeing a blue haired woman, he lowered his guard, "Ehh... Yes... I suppose."
"How is that you came to join our company? I heard that you spent some time on the Dread Isle... Was it one of Elimine's missions?" she said curiously. "My name is Isadora," she added after a moment.
" Ahh... Sort of... I guess," Renault shrugged.
" ...? I may not be the most pious of souls, but I am a believer in the teachings of Elimine. It is an honor to protect one of her bishops!" Isadora said with pride.
" I'm sorry, but... I don't think I'm worthy of being called a bishop. Long ago, I was a mercenary. I led a bloody, thoughtless life, unconnected to the holy teachings," Renault said. Memories slowly came back to him. Renault killing. Renault destroying. Renault watching his best friend die.
Murderer…
"Is that so? And then...what brought you to the light of Elimine?" Isadora said curiously.
"I...lost a friend. A man I could have called brother. But when he died, I knew nothing of prayers, of forgiveness. I only knew how to bash another man's skull... So I cast aside my weapons and knelt for the first time... to mourn my fallen friend," Renault said, trying his hardest to keep the tears out of his eyes.
Isadora did not notice, "Bishop, may I have a moment?"
"Mm..."
"Will you hear my sins? It has been a...very long time since my last confession," she said embarrassed.
"Confession... I am not so good at these priestly matters," he said.
"Please, do this for me..." she begged.
"...Very well. If all I must do is listen... I do not mind," Renault said reluctantly.
"Your Excellency... I was born as the youngest daughter of a country nobleman. I wanted to become a knight from my earliest childhood, so I spent many long, bitter hours in training... I hoped to someday protect my country proudly... But... There was one thing for which I was not prepared... To protect, one must do battle with one's enemies... And to do battle with one's enemies, one must...strike...those enemies," she said slowly.
Renault said nothing.
"I have taken many lives in battle before now... For justice, for peace, for my lord, and for my country... I have fought all this time as a brave knight."
" And do you regret this choice?" Renault asked.
"No, I... I think we fight for the right reasons... However...at times, I grow uneasy. I grow sorrowful for the lives cut short on the end of my blade," she said.
Renault said nothing.
"Your Excellency... Am I wrong for feeling this way? What should I do?" Isadora asked.
"..." Renault didn't speak.
"Bishop..." Isadora said cautiously, looking Renault in the eye.
"Forgive me. I am a fraud. I can offer you no solace," Renault looked at the ground, not meeting her gaze. "You're better off seeing someone else of the cloth, you deserve better than a murderer like me." And with that, Renault walked away, whatever peace he felt was gone. Violent memories plagued his mind.
Murderer…
Renault walked back to his tent. There were still a few hours before Tactician Colby had announced they'd need to move out.
Upon entering his tent, Renault set his staff and tome down and lay upon the bed, trying to banish the horrible memories with sleep.
He was unsuccessful.
"Your Excellency?"
Renault's eyes snapped open. He hadn't slept at all, but it wasn't like he needed sleep any more. Nergal had seen to that with his experiments.
"Lucius?" Renault said.
"Yes Your Excellency?" he asked.
"You look much better. Have you...recovered some?" Renault inquired.
"Yes. I took your words to heart, so to speak... Thank you," Lucius smiled.
"Ah, good. Then you will overcome it in no time," Renault said, relief sweeping over him. At least some good had come of this day.
"...How I wish that could..." Lucius said wistfully.
"You said the blemish lies on your soul? Speak of it to me, child," Renault said, genuinely curious.
"I... I grew up in an orphanage... and I faced much grief in that place... Poverty and despair can eat one's very soul... There was one teacher there who was particularly cruel to me... Even now... I pray that this evil man might be led away from darkness..." Lucius said, his hands quivering.
"I see... ...and were you there from birth?" Renault asked.
"No, Your Excellency. ...I remember living with my mother and father until the age of three," he said, his expression mixed with happiness and sadness.
"And why did you go to the orphanage?" the bishop said.
"Our house...was invaded by a thief. My father was a famous mercenary, but the man was too strong. I saw my father fall before me. I recall it sometimes, even now... The eyes of the thief who killed him. ...Like terrible dark stones set in his hate-filled face... All he left behind was this dagger protruding from my father's chest," Lucius said, his voice shaking.
Renault froze , realization falling upon him.
Lucius continued on, not noticing, "After my father's death, my mother fell ill... ...I was alone. In a cruel twist, this dagger is all I have of my father... ...Bishop Renault? What is it!? Your face is bright red!"
"Excuse me..." Renault muttered as he began to leave.
"Of course..." Lucius said with uncertainty.
Oh Kishuna… if you could see me now…how you would look away with disgust.
Murderer…
Renault stood outside Dragon's Gate looking at the huge structure with wonder.
Even after centuries I still can be amazed…
Renault glimpsed Isadora not too far from him. He walked over to her.
"Are you all right?" he asked.
"Your Excellency?" Isadora asked curiously.
"You don't look well... We can't have you die here. Try thinking about your village..." Renault advised.
"I shall..." she nodded and began to look better than before.
"... Isadora?" Renault said slowly.
"Y-Yes? What is it?" she said.
"About earlier... I may be a poor preacher, but please listen to me now..." Renault said with hesitation.
"Of course. What have you to tell me?" she said.
"You asked me what you should do. If I could give you one direction, one step along the path... It would be...to let yourself be lost," he said softly.
"Lost?" she inquired.
"Forgiving your sins is a small task for a bishop... And if that were enough to save you, I would recite the words. But you suffer... and you seek answers..." he said, looking at her now.
Isadora said nothing.
"And that is the greatest pain of all... The pain of doubt. If I dispelled this doubt, I could free you from your pain. But then you should be nothing more than a puppet that kills. Use your doubt. Use it to become something more. I think it makes you...human," Renault looked her right in the eyes now.
"Bishop Renault..." she started.
"Whether you will ever find answers, I do not know. But you must live with your doubt until then. If you can, then all of the joy and sorrow you experience... will truly belong to you," Renault turned away, but did not leave.
"Your Excellency..."
"I have lived this way since I found myself... Some are sustained by faith, but for me, there are no answers," he said quietly, more to himself than to her, and with that he left her to go stand alone.
Tactician Colby stood up on some rocks, a pink haired cleric holding his hand. "Alright, it's time," his voice echoed around the small army.
The group of soldiers headed into the Gate. Renault glimpsed a man that looked like Archsage Athos, but that couldn't be, could it?
Nergal had known the Archsage. Renault knew that much.
He has a much right to this fight as I do then.
Once inside, Renault found himself and the others staring at eight Morphs. Only they were too…unique to be normal Morphs. And one of them was human.
What is a human doing here?
Suddenly, a large number of Morphs were warped in. Now the Morphs were only slightly outnumbered by Lord Eliwood's force.
"Are you ready, Your Excellency?" Lucius asked him.
Renault nodded and set his sights on the human Bishop among the Morphs. The man intrigued him, who was he? A human serving Nergal? A Morph gone wrong? Elimine forbid, was he like Renault?
Lord Eliwood raised his massive sword, Durandal in the air and yelled, "Attack!"
Renault held up his staff and began to chant, he felt the familiar feeling, yet still unnerving, of light magic condensing into his staff. Renault pointed his staff at the nearest Morph and pierced him with light magic.
Murderer…
"Elimine, save me," he muttered with disgust of the bloodshed. He'd seen enough for a hundred lifetimes.
Though it wasn't as though Morphs were human after all, so he supposed he could withstand it.
Renault maneuvered himself so he was facing the enemy Bishop. Raising his staff in case of an attack, Renault asked commandingly, "Why do you serve him? What makes you fight for Nergal?"
The Bishop smirked arrogantly, "Hmph, you wouldn't understand, Eliminean Bishop. Nergal is god, not your accursed Saint. He will bring Dragons back and be far more powerful than the Eight Legends ever were!" The man cackled madly.
Is…this how I was?
Renault looked into the Bishop's eyes and saw himself. A younger self who was dedicated to getting revenge and bringing his best friend back. A man who didn't care of anything but himself and his goals. A man who served Nergal with absolute loyalty.
Renault clenched his fist, this was who he was back then. And it disgusted the Bishop.
"I pray the Saint does not deem you worthy of Heaven, you fiend!" Renault said furiously. Faster than he ever had before, he charged up a blast of light magic and flung it at his opponent.
But his enemy was fast as well. Their attacks met, midair and negated each other. The Bishop immediately threw another blast of light magic at Renault before he could react. Renault felt it strike his left side and he gasped in pain. But only a few seconds after being wounded, it healed!
I shall have to thank Lucius later. Elimine bless him.
The enemy Bishop seemed taken aback by the sudden healing giving Renault the upper hand. Sending several small light attacks at his enemy, Renault distracted him long enough to throw a spear of light magic into his opponent's stomach.
The man screamed, and he fell onto the ground, shaking and twitching in pain. Renault walked up to him and looked the Bishop in the eyes for a long moment, then struck him down with one final attack.
Invigorated, Renault looked around to see the rest of Lord Eliwood's force still fighting for their lives. Renault held his staff aloft and spoke a prayer to Elimine as he cast healing magic upon everyone.
The Bishop saw several heads turn in his direction nodding their thanks and resuming their fight.
Renault turned to see Nergal waiting patiently in a room ahead, the giant doors open so he could see.
It is for this moment that I have lived...
Renault walked quickly towards his foe, his cloth robes preventing him from running without tripping.
Once he was close enough, he said, "...Nergal, do you remember me?"
Nergal regarded him for a moment before chuckling in the way Renault had come to hate, "Hah. You are... Renault. So you're still eeking out a wretched existence?"
Renault burned with anger, "I went astray. I listened to your honeyed words... I dreamt of the impossible... the return of a lost soul. But...what you gave me was... a puppet... It was soulless...nothing more than an empty vessel!"
Nergal smirked, "Just an empty vessel... Isn't that what you wanted? You desired to bring back your dead friend. You were my experiment, and I completed my morph. I'm grateful, Renault. Thanks to you, I gained power."
"You villain... You cursed him! Your crime can never be forgiven! I will end you with my hands, in the name of Kishuna!" Renault screamed. He channeled all his hate a fury into one single magical attack and flung it at Nergal.
Nergal brushed it aside with a wave of his hand. "How weak. You're still as pathetic as when you once served me. Though I never expected you to become a man of the cloth Renault."
Renault despaired, his attack did nothing! "I found the light I had been searching for. I found my path I had been searching for." Renault shot blast after blast at Nergal, all of which did nothing.
"Why isn't it working!?" Renault said to himself angrily.
"Because you're weak, and you always will be!" Nergal shouted. He raised his hand and darkness surrounded Renault. The Bishop closed his eyes, knowing what feeling he would experience.
And he felt nothing.
Opening his eyes, he saw Lucius standing in front of him, spellbook raised.
"Your Excellency, let me help you against this blackheart!" Lucius said with confidence Renault wasn't expecting.
Oh Brother Lucius, you wouldn't help me if you knew the truth…
Nergal's confidence didn't waver as he merely summoned up another black magic attack. He underestimated the Monk though, as Lucius blocked the attack completely.
Nergal's eyes narrowed as he launched a barrage of attacks at Lucius, which the Monk mostly deflected or blocked. Those he didn't, Renault healed him.
Lucius his Nergal with an attack, throwing him backward a foot or two and Renault shot his own blast in attempt to help Lucius.
Nergal turned his head distractedly towards Renault. Lucius threw a beam of light magic that hit Nergal directly in the heart.
The old Druid quivered on his feet slightly, before giving a cry of rage as he tried to retaliate. But when he tried to summon his magic, Lucius denied him. And with one last attack, Lucius smite the blackhearted man down.
As he saw the man he hated above all fall to the ground, Renault felt an enormous sigh of relief pass through his body. For the first time in a long time, he smiled a true smile.
"Your Excellency?" Lucius asked curiously.
"It's nothing," Renault replied. "I'm just pleased this is over with."
Lucius nodded, agreeing with him.
Then there was a roar. Multiple roars.
Renault looked up and swore. Lucius looked at him in surprise, but that was when he saw the Dragons too. "By the Saint!" he cried out.
Renault stood up. They weren't finished with this fight yet.
But Renault was tapped out of light magic. He raised his staff and healed everyone with what remained in his Fortify staff. After it's last use, its gem at the top turned gray and no longer shown red.
"I'm tapped out," Renault said.
Lucius nodded, "I'm almost out, but we can't just sit here…"
As he was talking, two of the mighty beast fell over, dead. Wishing he could have seen what caused it, Renault started walking forward as Lord Eliwood's army engaged the Dragon.
And Renault was useless, just like he'd been when trying to save Kishuna.
I'm nothing but a murderer…
Renault stayed back, he knew battle well enough that he'd just get in the way.
And when the Dragon fell, Renault did not join in with the cheering.
What had he done? He was useless.
Author Notes: Sorry for the game script. Next chapter will have much, much less.
"There's always another secret."
-Kelsier, Mistborn