Chapter Two.

Lauren crossed the square and she found herself outside the pub. She stared at the Queen Vic. This was going to be hard. The craving to have a drink hadn't gone away. Not completely. It was still there, like a little nagging voice in the back of her mind telling her one drink would make her feel better, but she also knew one more drink could kill her. Taking a deep breath she opened the door and stepped inside, looking around at the familiar faces in the pub. Luckily there was no Joey, Whitney, Lucy or Tyler. Being back in the Vic wasn't as bad as she thought it was going to be, she had built it up to be a bigger deal in her head that it actually was. She didn't have the urge to drink, she didn't want to drink, and that was half of the battle, feeling triumphant and a little braver she walked up to the bar and Alfie turned to serve her.

'Lauren' he said and she watched as a smile spread across his face

'Hi' she told him 'I'm not here to drink' she said to him 'I just came to apologise for the…'

'No apology needed darling' he shook his head softly 'I understand'

'Please I need to …I need to say that I'm sorry'

'Apology accepted' he said to her with a smile.

'Thank you' she smiled back at him 'Can I ask you not to tell anyone I'm back? I'm kind of working my way through apologies and I need to do them on my own terms, in my own time?'

'I won't say a word' he told her 'I am glad you're looking so well' he told her.

'Me too' she replied, she turned and walked out of the pub and saw Lucy walk into Janine's property offices. She thought about following her in but changed her mind and went to see Fatboy and then Poppy.

Fats and Poppy were very understanding and forgiving, much like Lauren had thought they would be, she was pleased she had crossed those two off her list. She'd also made arrangements with Poppy to have a girl's night in pampering session at her house tomorrow night. Her next stop was Tyler, so she went in search of him. She saw him go into the café and she followed.

A quick glance around made Lauren feel relieved there was no one else there she didn't yet want to run into. She paid for a coffee to take out and took it over to the table, pulling out the chair and sitting down.

'Hi Tyler' she said softly.

'Lauren! I didn't know that you were back' he said in surprise.

'Yeah I only got back yesterday' she told him softly 'I'm working my way through apologies and things' she said with a small smile.

'You've got nothing to apologise to me for' he told her softly 'you were in a bad place and we should've helped you instead of pushing you away. We only made things worse for you, we should be apologising to you'

'So does that mean that we are okay?' Lauren asked him. 'Me kissing you didn't ruin things with you and Whit?'

'No, nothing got ruined and yes we're good. So how are you?' he asked her 'You look good' he added with a smile. 'No that's a lie, you look great'

She smiled and blushed a little, not used to the compliment, usually people were telling her that she looked awful, before rehab anyway, 'Thanks, I'm doing okay' she nodded 'A little worried about how people would react when I came back….' She trailed off with a shrug 'I've spoken to Ian and Alfie. Fats and Poppy and now you' she told him 'My next stop is Whitney, then Lucy and then Joey…..maybe. So what's been going on here?' she asked him softly 'You and Whit are still together?'

'Yes we are, still planning the wedding' he told her nodding his head 'Whitney's got a new job at the school, as a teaching assistant, she's doing quite well for herself' he told her with a proud smile. He licked his lips and looked down 'Lucy told us what she did' he said looking up at her.

'What do you mean?' Lauren frowned at him.

'She told us that she spiked your drink that night, the night Joey broke up with you'

'Oh that' Lauren said and she looked down.

'Joey was pretty upset with her' Tyler said 'He felt terrible about how things ended between the two of you'

'It was bound to happen' Lauren said 'I pressed the self-destruct button, didn't I, hey?' she said shrugging 'so is he still with Lucy?' she tried to sound casual but failed miserably.

'It's hard to tell who he's with nowadays' Tyler said 'but I don't think he's with Lucy not anymore anyway' he told her, her eyes flicked down to hide the hurt she felt at that revelation.

Lauren felt her heart clench, so the reason Joey hadn't contacted her was because he'd moved on. Well she knew this was a possibility, she'd hoped deep down it wouldn't happen, that he would be waiting for her, missing her just as she'd missed him, clinging onto the hope of her coming back just as she'd clung onto him throughout rehab. If she was honest with herself he was the main reason that she came back. Lauren took a breath, 'I'm glad you and Whitney are okay' she told him 'do you know where she is now?' she asked him.

He looked at his watch 'She's probably at work, she won't be home until school ends' he told her.

Lauren nodded 'Okay thanks, well I'd better go, I'd, um, I would appreciate if you didn't say anything about me being back yet….'

'Okay' he nodded and he looked at her 'are you okay?'

'Yeah I'm fine' she nodded 'I'm glad we're okay' she said with a smile as she got up 'I'll see you around?' she left her coffee on the table.

'Yeah you will' he nodded with a grin.

He watched her leave and wondered if he shouldn't have said anything about Joey, the news that he hadn't exactly been pining away for her didn't look as though it had gone down too well, Tyler felt bad for telling her.

Lauren walked through the square, she knew she had 3 more people left to see, Whitney, Lucy and Joey, but right now she felt as though she'd done enough. And the news Tyler had given her about Joey had hurt. So she decided she would leave seeing the three others until tomorrow. She walked back to the house and let herself in.

'Hello?' she called out. The house was empty. Relief flowed through her that she wouldn't have to explain to her dad why she'd left the house after promising she wouldn't. She walked into the kitchen and made herself a coffee. She carried it through to the lounge and sat down on the sofa with a sigh, flicking on the TV but not really watching it.

That night after dinner, she excused herself and went to bed. She didn't sleep well that night, she was thinking about how her conversation with Joey would go, or if she would even have one with him. She wasn't sure what to do. She knew she'd hurt him; that she had done some terrible things to him, to their relationship, she knew she owed him a huge apology, but she wasn't sure she could face him. Back in rehab she had planned what she would say to him, of course when she ran through the scenario in her head, Joey always forgave her, told her he missed her and he loved her and he would take her in his arms and he would kiss her, but deep down Lauren knew things weren't going to turn out that way. Life didn't turn out that way. Not for her. She was a Branning, and they didn't get their happy ever after.

AN: So Max didn't even know that she left the house! The apologies with Alfie, Poppy and Fats and Tyler went well and Lauren was feeling good about herself until Tyler dropped the tiny bombshell that Joey hadn't been pining around after her, like she had him. So does that mean she won't see him to apologise? Her whole plan was to get back with Joey and stay in Walford, now that he's seeing other people will her plans change? Thank you for all your reviews so far! Guest reviewers I can't reply to you personally but your reviews are appreciated. Hi C! Glad you like Revelry!

R&R as always