Penny attempts to regain her composure quickly. She mentally shakes herself out of her reverie and looks toward Sheldon, "so when does this writer come?" she asks.
"Well, if she is punctual-which I doubt she will be- any time now." Penny offers a nod of recognition before walking back towards her apartment as if on auto pilot.
"Hey Penny, where are you going?" Leonard calls after her. She just waves her hand behind her head before slamming the door behind her.
Penny lets out a shaky breathe before sliding slowly towards the ground. She draws her legs up to her chest and lets out a noiseless sob. Why of all the days did one of the sisters have to come today? On the anniversary of her sister's death none the less. Penny groans thinking this is probably the universes way of saying hahaha you killed your sister karma's a bitch.
God, she had to think of a way to get out of here. There is no way she can face Phoebe. Especially, when she is such an emotional wreck today.
An idea hit Penny like a ton of bricks. She quickly whipped the stray tears away from her face with the back of her hand as she stands up quickly.
She runs to her room. She throws the overused and abused duffel bag onto her always unmade bed. Without haste she throws her closet doors open, grabbing her favorite clothe she shoves them into the bag. She reaches for her shoes when her hand touches something fuzzy. She lifts up a brown wig.
She gasps, this could be her way out. Penny finishes throwing things into her bag, looking but not seeing what she puts in there. In the background she can hear a faint knocking, so faint that it sounds like Leonard's apartment door that's being knocked on. Crap, Phoebe must be here already.
Penny rushes toward the bathroom, throwing on a quick outfit, adjusts the wig onto her head, than throws on a pair of oversized sunglasses before throwing the duffel bag over her shoulder.
As quietly as possible Penny opens her door and creeps outside, she locks the door and turns to high tail it the hell out of dodge. As soon as she goes to head down the stairs Leonard's apartment opens revealing Leonard, Sheldon, and of course Phoebe.
"Hey Penny, where are you going?" Leonard asks.
In her best british accent-hey, those acting lessons paid off- she yells over her shoulder that she had an audition. Penny doesn't stick around long enough to hear their response. She just keeps running down the stairs as if her life depended on it.
She reaches her beat up piece of crap car and basically throws herself inside. Her hands grasp the steering wheel to steady herself. A shaky breathe escapes her lips.
At this point she refuses to cry. She slowly puts the car in reverse and just starts driving. To where? No specific destination is specifically in mind. She just needs to clear her head. How the hell has she let this control her life again.
Penny gets lost in her thoughts of the past and the good times she had with the sisters, before she knows it a car is speeding in front of her. She slams on the brakes as best as she can. She narrowly misses the speeding car. The opposing driver flips her off before speeding off. She curses the gods and everything else she can possibly think of. As she regains her composure she pulls into a small bar on the side of the road.
Even if the accident wouldn't have been her fault, she feels she isn't in any condition to be driving. She sits down at one of the bar stools. She opts out of ordering a drink, she needs to drive herself wherever she is headed anyway.
As the bartender cleans out a glass he looks her up and down. He gives a little smirk before approaching her.
"I've seen that look before." He says with a chuckle.
She looks up unamused, "What look?"
"That very one that you're wearing now. I wore it just a few years ago myself, it's the one that screams that you're running from something."
"Wh-what? You have no idea what I'm thinking about." Penny states.
The bartender shakes his head, "It's my job to know what everyone is thinking. I'm a bartender you're here for one of three reasons: one you're drowning your sorrows, two- you're trying to pick up a man, or three- you're running from something. By the looks of it your number three."
Penny gives a noncommittal huff.
"So, what are you trying to run from?"
"What makes you think I'm going to tell you?" Penny asks.
"Well, you wouldn't be here if you had someone to talk to. So I'm all ears, here to lend an unbiased opinion."
Penny offers him a small smile. "Well, as a matter of fact I feel like I'm running." She pauses before continuing, "A few years back I did something I regret. Something that hurt a lot of people, and I ran. I ran fast and hard. I didn't look back, not once. Now, all of a sudden in my new life someone I considered a sister shows up."
Penny stops talking, giving the bartender a chance to give his input.
The bartender doesn't look up right away, he just continues washing that already dry glass. Penny begins to get impatient, "Well?"
"If you want my opinion all you have to do is ask."
She rolls her eyes, this is total bullshit. But, she wants to know what he thinks. "Ok, what do you think?"
He gently sets the glass down and looks at her. Penny is taken aback, he looks as if he is peering right into her soul. She averts her eyes to the table.
"Did you stick around long enough to find out what the others reactions were to whatever it was you did?"
"Uh, well no. I didn't want to have to face them."
The bartender nods his head, "Well, then the only thing you can be scared of is what your mind makes up."
Penny ponders that statement but comes up blank, the bartender must have sensed that because he continues, "Until you actually are in the situation where you confront those from your past you have no idea how they will react. They could be ok with what you did. You have no idea; the only thing you have to be scared of is those awful scenarios you thought up in that pretty little head of yours."
That gives Penny a lot to think about. She has no idea how any of them will even react. Maybe it won't be as bad as she thinks. Huh, she looks down at her phone to see a few missed calls. The digital numbers showed it was 10 O'clock already. She should really head home. Maybe, maybe she would talk to Phoebe.
"Uh, where is your bathroom?" Penny asks hesitantly. The bartender smiles and points his finger to the back of the bar. She makes her way over there and opens the door to the ladies room. She removes the horrendous wig and tosses it into the trash. She touches up her makeup. This is it no more hiding. It's time to face her fears.
Penny heads back out she looks back toward the bartender, "Thank you, for everything. I didn't catch your name, what is it?"
He smiles, "No thanks is necessary. Maybe I should be thanking you. Let's just say I'm a friend from above." He winks at her before turning back toward whatever he was doing behind the bar.
She gasps, no, he couldn't be. "Wh-what do you mean?"
"Just because the charmed ones couldn't find you didn't mean the rest of us couldn't."
Before she could ask anymore question he was gone. She runs a hand through her wavy hair. She just smiles up at the sky before heading out toward her car again. Now she was off to face her life.