Your Choice: Chapter 2
He knew that no matter what he did, he would hurt Sarah. He sat anxiously on the couch with the envelope held loosely between his fingers, not sure what he should do next. He wasn't about to wake her up and tell her. He knew that would make it harder to leave. She was going to hate him when the sun came up. That was the only thing he was sure of…
Down the hall, he could make out a small, stifling cry. James was only about a month old now and couldn't seem to sleep all night. Steve pushed himself off the couch and padded down the hall to James' nursey. He cracked the door slightly and peeked inside. The nightlight let him see his son thrashing around in the crib. Steve was at his side before another thought passed. He slipped his hands under him and picked him up. He thought for a moment how Sarah taught his to hold him.
James stopped crying almost immediately. Steve paced back and forth in the nursey, not forgetting to bounce. He hummed a made up song under his breath. This will be the last time you hold him, Steve told himself. He pushed the ugly thought away and tried to remember the day he was born.
Sarah was in labor for 12 hours. Steve knew he paced the living room a hundred times before the doctor came to get him. He was a master at handling stress, but not this kind. The next thing he knew, he was being forced into Sarah's room. She was screaming out and Steve's instinct was to turn around and leave. But he didn't. A nurse steered him with her hands on his shoulders to the bedside where he could see her. He remembered how pale she was and how her eyes were filled with distress.
"S-stevee…" she gasped his name. He took her hand and beamed down at her. "Hey baby…you're doing great! You remember the way they taught you to breathe in class?" She clenched her jaw and gave him a tight nob.
"Good. Alright," he sank to his knees," You need to breathe like that now, okay?" She was digging her fingernails into the side of his hand but he didn't care. The doctor stood at the end of the bed, "Alright, Sarah when I say push, you push, okay?" "O-okaayy," she wheezed.
"I see his head!"
"Push, Sarah, push!"
"Steve? Was he crying again?" Steve was ushered back into the present when he saw Sarah standing at the doorway.
Steve was still bouncing James. "Um…yeah he was….I got him though…" He whispered. She nodded and clawed a piece of hair away from her face and tugged at the oversized t-shirt she was wearing.
"Are you okay? It's super late…" she yawned. "I can get him if you want to go to bed…"
Steve gave her a small smile, "Its okay. I got him." She shrugged her shoulders and started to walk away. "Hey," Steve couldn't stop himself. Sarah turned to look at him.
"I love you…" Steve muttered. She smirked and cocked her head, "I love you too…" she replied before trudging back to bed. Steve cradled his son in his arms and sadness swirl in his gut. Tears sprung to his eyes and he pressed a quick kiss to James' forehead before laying him back down in the crib. Steve rubbed his face with both hands, feeling himself getting emotional. What was he doing?... He stepped out of the nursey, being sure to close the door behind himself. He caught sight of his bag lying by the front door. His feet felt like lead as he forced himself to walk through the living room. The door was heavier than he remembered as he opened it. Tony said he couldn't guarantee anything, not even success. He stepped out and slung his bag over his shoulder. There weren't any guarantees, but Steve knew that he could guarantee one thing. He was not going to back down from this fight.