I awoke the next morning, feeling parched. I knew why. Unenthusiastically, I lifted up my covers, to release my legs from them, and sat up. Perched up on my bed, I noticed that I was still dressed in my school uniform. I sighed, and stood up. Then I remembered the reason for that. I sighed once again. I thought about skipping school for the day, as I felt like I couldn't bring myself to go, not yet anyway; I wasn't ready to face Mikado yet, and especially not Anri. Trying to forget it all, I sauntered into the kitchen, slouching as I went, grabbed a glass and opened the fridge. In the corner of the fridge was a soda. It was half empty, as I saw it, being pessimistic, as I am. I sighed, remembering that Mikado had left it last time he was here. I guess it was a sign. But I ignored it, trying my hardest to push the signal away, which is harder than it sounds. I decided to fix one dilemma at a time, starting with my problem of dehydration. Swiftly, I closed the fridge, deciding I would rather have some water. I placed the glass under the tap, and twisted the tap's handle. The water cascaded into the cup, and of no fault of my own, I began thinking again. Thinking, something I had been doing too much of lately. I got to thinking about what I actually meant to Mikado. I must have not meant that much if he could just up sticks and go out with Anri. I even considered whether he loved me in the first place, whether he was just toying with my emotions, but he wouldn't do that. Would he? I didn't know what to believe anymore.
Suddenly I felt a shiver travel through my body and a cold feeling in my left hand. I woke from my thoughts. The tap was still running, and the water was spewing out from the rim of the cup and streaming down my hand. I stared for a moment, not quite comprehending to stop it I should move my hand and turn off the tap. Once I realized this, I did so. I sighed, another thing I had been doing too much lately.
That's when I decided. I needed to tell someone. Tell them how I felt, let out my emotions. I couldn't just keep it locked inside me the whole time, it would just build up, and eventually I'd have no choice but to explode. And I didn't want that. But I didn't know who to tell, I had one person in mind, it seemed so perfect, but at the same time the most imperfect. Saki, she'd understand, listen, and give me her honest opinion. But I couldn't, I was more likely to want to see Mikado than see Saki. I needed more time. She was out, who next? Izaya-san? He'd never agree to it, and he wouldn't even care… But I was stupid enough to try…
I ran into my room, grabbed my phone, and with a few clicks of the buttons, it was ringing. Calling Orihara Izaya, the screen read. I sighed… again; I was beginning to piss myself off. The suspense was horrifying; all I could hear was the dialling tone. After a few beats of the tone I calmed down, knowing that there was no way he would say yes, this was just my confirmation. But the suspense kicked in again as the tone continued. Maybe he's not awake yet, who knows what time he wakes up to do his trolling of the world, and he might get angry if I wake him, and I truly didn't want that. I was about to hang up when I heard it, his voice. "What a surprise, I wasn't expecting to be receiving a call from Kida Masaomi-kun".
I froze. At that moment, I forgot everything. Why was I even doing this? What was I even doing?
"Ne~? Masaomi-kun, are still you there?" The teasing tone lingered. My eyes narrowed with detest. But I still continued. My anger left me as soon as I began to speak, and distorted into fear.
I began to stammer. "I was just… ummm… well, there's something on my mind… and I just wanted to tell someone, and I didn't know who else to-" I stopped there. He was going to say no, I wanted him to, but at the same time, I wanted him to say yes, I was making a fool out of myself, and the one listening to my stupid plead, was the worst possible person to beg to. I was about to strike out my request. But I was interrupted.
"Sure," My jaw dropped. I really wasn't expecting that.
I couldn't see it, but I knew there would now be a large smirk, stretching all the way across his face. Sick and twisted, as it always was.
"I-… okay", was all I could say in return.
"Great! Fancy some Russian Sushi? It's on me~!"Meet you in say, well, I've got some work to finish, but how does six sound? I should be done by then and it ought to give you enough time to prepare yourself" Prepare myself? What the hell was that supposed to mean. My anger blossomed again. Except before I could unleash myself, I realized he had hung up.
Wearily, I walked over to my bed, and sat down. Izaya was just going to make fun of me for it, so why ask him, I don't know. I shelved my back down onto the bed. I sighed. It was only nine, in the morning. I still had at least ten hours 'til I had to be there. Realizing I was still rather tired, I decided to get some more sleep.
I wish I hadn't done that…
I had a nightmare. It's amazing how many events you can fit into a singular dream. I won't go into much depth about it; mainly because I don't really want to, but basically, Anri and Mikado were dating, nothing changed there then, and they couldn't keep their hands off each other. It was really pissing me off, another thing to add to the "doing too much of lately" list. However, that wasn't all that happened. Lots of events took place, actions that I don't want to talk about. But in the end, Anri kicked the bucket, but that wasn't what made it a nightmare. It was the fact I was happy… How could I think that, ever, she's my friend, someone important to me, why? I suppose the answer is rather obvious. I'm jealous. Well, if you thought that, you'd be wrong. The correct answer is as follows. I'm afraid. Afraid of losing my friend, the fact I'd been dumped, like trash into a bin, so easily, so quickly, no preparation.
Preparation. Prepare myself. Like Izaya said, I needed to be prepared, for anything.
I woke from my nightmare, beads of sweat on my forehead. For a moment, I lay still on my bed, breathing heavily. Once I had reassured myself it wasn't true, I sat up. Noticing the time, I panicked. It was five minutes to six. Meaning, I had only five minutes to; get dressed, get presentable, and get out of there and leg it over to Russian Sushi. Crap. How the hell did I sleep for so long? Immediately, I leapt out of bed and into the bathroom. I looked in the mirror, I was a mess. I had no time for a shower, so I had to try my best to make it look like I had taken one earlier. I brushed my hair, not something I did often. I did it so that it looked like I hadn't been trying to look good, but so that it was natural. It's harder than it sounds. Once I was done, I hurriedly ran back into my room, grabbed some clothes and changed into then as fast as I could.
As soon as I was done, I wasted no time. I ran straight to Russian Sushi, stopping for nothing, I really did not want to test Izaya's patience. Running, a forth thing I'd been doing too much of.