** For authors notes, disclaimer etc. see chapter 1

Conversations with other women 2

"God Jean you said you were bringing a takeaway not one of everything on the menu." Laura laughed opening the door and standing aside as Jean walked past her holding up the two paper carrier bags.

"I didn't know what you liked so I got a mixed banquet thing I wasn't expecting it to be so much." She laughed handing Laura the bags.

"Go sit down there's wine on the coffee table I'll get the plates."

"I called James on the way over to see if he had any concerns during the case about Robbie and Marion Hammond. I didn't say you'd said anything, you know how things become personal for Robbie at times I just asked if he'd noticed anything this time."

"And what did he say?" Laura asked as they opened carious takeaway cartons setting them on the coffee table in front of them.

"He didn't notice anything in particular, if anything he thought Robbie found the whole bondage photos and tribal art thing a bit weird so I don't think there's anything to worry about, not that I ever thought there would be. For all that he gets involved at time he knows where the line is drawn."

"So James just told you how he saw the situation because you called him at almost nine on a Friday night and asked? Told you he's nuts about you!"

"Laura!" Jan laughed as they settled down on opposite ends of the sofa and a comfortable silence fell as they ate." Can I ask you something personal?"

"Yeah of course you can, I can't promise I'll answer thought." Laura smiled enjoying the relaxed atmosphere in the room as Jean rolled her eyes.

"Why are you still waiting? For Robbie I mean, I don't know if I could have been as patient as you've been. Val's been dead over ten years do you think he's actually going to get to the point where he's ready for another relationship?"

Staring at her food for a second Laura let the question sink in. She'd asked herself the same thing more than once and still wasn't sure of the answer. It wasn't like she'd spent the last few years pining away staring at the four walls of her living room waiting for his call but it was true that she'd never quite been able to give up the hope that one day he'd come round. They'd almost made it so many times now it was becoming ridiculous and if she was honest that was probably the reason. What she saw in those almost moments, the way he was with her and how it seemed so right for them to be together was what kept her coming back.

"I don't know if he'll ever get there Jean, sometimes it feels like he will or even that he has though. When he's like that and we get close it feels right I think that's worth waiting for."

"Indefinitely?" Jean asked aware that she may be pushing the subject a little too much but determined to do so anyway. She wanted Robbie to be happy and she couldn't see how that could happen while he still refused to move on. When he let Laura in he was like a different man, one who looked forward rather than back.

"Indefinitely is a long time, I can't say that I would or I wouldn't wait as long as it took I just know I'm not ready to give up yet. That doesn't mean I don't worry sometimes that it isn't Val that's the problem but me. I wonder if it's just not right enough for him and someone else will come along who is right. If that happened I don't know how I'd cope with it." Laura continued taking a gulp o the wine in her hand in an attempt to hide the emotion in her voice and knowing she was failing.

"Hence the concern about Marion Hammond?"

"Yeah see the waiting isn't that hard Jean, we see each other all the time, sometimes I see a little bit of what I want to be the basis of a new relationship for us and that's enough to keep me going. If it turned out that I has waited and he never got over Val I could live with that you can't….well you can't fight a ghost, you can't do anything if your competition is memories and grief. If he ended up moving on with someone else though that would be unbearable. It would mean all the waiting had been pointless.

"You can't really believe that could happen." Jean continued setting aside her empty plate and turning to face her friend tucking her legs under herself and sighing as Laura shrugged. It was obvious to everyone that Robbie had fallen for her a long time ago and the fact he wasn't ready to admit it was a formality as far as she was concerned. Now though she could see real doubt in Laura's eyes and that was worrying to say the least. "Laura he adores you everyone can see that. When you are around he's like a different person and when you're not he suffers terribly from mentioniteis your name manages to make it into just about every conversation. When he's ready…"

"If he's ever ready." Laura interrupted mirroring Jean's actions and discarding her food resting her head back on the sofa and taking a deep breath. She'd never talked to anyone about this stuff before. Her friends who didn't really know him often asked about how things were going between them and she knew at times she suffered from Jean's amusingly named mentioniteis herself but to talk about it properly meant talking to someone who knew them both.

"I think he'll be ready someday." Jean reassured "Maybe even sooner rather than later but the point I'm making is that when he is you'll be the one he chooses. To be honest I don't think he could choose to have a relationship with someone else even if he wanted to, he feels too strongly about you."

"I thought a couple of years ago we were actually going somewhere. You remember the bank holiday weekend you were at that wedding and had to come back, the quiz weekend murder?"

"Yeah I remember it all too well." Jean sighed pushing aside the memory of the weekend and the almighty row when her husband returned after being left alone with her family. It had been yet another nail in the coffin of her marriage which had finally been buried not long after and she could do without reliving it.

"We were supposed to go away that weekend, separate rooms and all that but I don't think either of us thought both rooms would get used. We had to cancel then there was the whole nightmare at Halloween that year. We seemed to take a long time to get past that; it's the only time I remember really thinking that it wasn't going to happen."

"He was probably frightened by what happened Laura. He'd never admit it but when you were in danger I'd imagine all he could think of was that he'd lose you just like he lost Val." Seeing tears threatening to overtake her friend Jean refilled both their glasses. Robbie had never talked about how he'd felt as Laura's friends were picked off and it looked like she might be the next victim at any moment but it didn't take a psychologist to know that if he was getting close to her and then was faced with the possibility that he might lose her it would have been hard for him.

"Maybe…..I don't know. Enough about me can I ask you a personal question now?"

"Of course you can I can't guarantee I'll answer thought." Jean smiled as Laura laugh at the repetition of her own words. "Seriously though yeah go one since we're exchanging confidences what do you want to ask?"

"We all know…..look I know you've never actually said so but it's sort of the worst kept secret in the station and there abouts that you and your husband aren't together anymore. Are you ok? I mean do you want to talk about it? Obviously tell me to mind my own business if you want I just…."

"It's fine Laura relax." Jean sighed, she knew that there was gossip, nothing bypassed those who were interested in the business of their superiors and all it took was someone to know someone else who heard something and it was all over the station. "it's a long story if you really want to hear it I think we need to open another bottle of wine."