Dealing with the Worst DC
Chapter 2 Air Deadpool
By: Major144
Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel or DC this is just a story for fun.
The remains of Lobo finally pulled themselves together. The bounty hunter moaned as he looked around in confusion.
"What happened?" Demanded Lobo as he stood up.
"A space ship came out of a wormhole and hit you." Said the Control System.
Lobo looked down at the Control System.
"Where's the bike?" Demanded Lobo as he picked up the Control System.
"The ones who crashed into you took it. One of them hopped onto the bike and the security system activated, however the thief appeared to have a healing factor and he survived. He then yanked me out and took the bike." Said the Control System.
"Son of a bitch! I'll track those assholes down and make them pay!" Roared Lobo.
"The bikes homing device is still active, I can use that to track the bike." Said the Control System.
"Maybe your not so useless." Said Lobo as he walked off carrying the Control System.
Miles away Deadpool and Bob had managed to push the bike to a junkyard. Deadpool first repaired the huge hole in his pants from the security system, before he and Bob went searching for a sidecar. After twenty minutes of searching they found one and welded it to the side of the bike. Deadpool hopped onto the bike, while Bob put on a helmet and hopped into the sidecar.
"Yeah let's get moving! I can't wait to try this baby out!" Said Deadpool as he turned the key.
"This is going to end with us crashing." Said Wilson.
"What makes you say that?" Asked Wade.
"Literally every time we try to fly something, we end up crashing it somehow. We riding a flying alien motorcycle, so I think our chances of crashing are pretty high right now." Said Wilson.
"You worry to much." Said Wade.
The bike took off at incredible speed! Deadpool yelled in excitement as Bob let out a panicked scream. The bike soared over the junkyard and raced north towards Jump City.
"Let's see how high this bad boy can go!" Said Deadpool as he pointed the bike upwards.
The bike flew higher and higher, until it reached the clouds. Bob looked around in amazement.
"This is a pretty good view." Said Bob.
"Yeah it's kind of pretty up here." Said Deadpool.
A loud noise from the right caused Deadpool and Bob to look to their right, just in time to see a large jumbo plane heading their way!
"Told you something bad was going to happen!" Said Wilson.
"This sucks!" Shouted Wade.
"Time to dive!" Shouted Deadpool as he quickly pointed the bike down.
The bike just barely missed hitting the underside of the plane as it shot towards the ground. Deadpool was yelling, while Bob screamed. The bike raced towards the ground in a nosedive. Deadpool furiously yanked on the controls trying to pull up.
"Why do flying machines hate me so much?!" Shouted Deadpool as the ground grew steadily closer.
At the last possible minute Deadpool managed to get the bike out of the nosedive and moving forward down the road. Everything seemed ok, until the duo almost hit an eighteen wheeler. Deadpool yanked on the controls and the bike flew into the air towards a large billboard that had a women wearing a bikini eating a cheeseburger! Deadpool tried to steer out of the way, but the controls were locked.
"Abandon space bike!" Shouted Deadpool.
"Oh my god!" Cried Bob as he threw himself from the sidecar.
The former Hydra Agent fell threw the air and landed in the branches of a tree. The air was knocked out of Bob's lungs, but he was ok.
"Man Bob must have one overworked guardian angle." Said Wade.
"Indeed. Quick question why are we still on the vehicle that's fixing to crash?" Said Wilson.
"Um...I don't know." Said Wade.
"I'm surrounded by idiots." Groaned Wilson.
The bike raced towards the billboard and Deadpool threw himself off. The bike crashed into the top of the billboard, while Deadpool crashed between the billboard women's large cleavage. Deadpool groaned as he fell off of the sign and landed in front of it.
"Is...this heaven?" Asked Deadpool with a groan as he looked up at the billboard and starred at the giant women.
"No we're still alive." Said Wilson.
"Figures." Grumbled Wade.
Deadpool stood up as Bob came walking up to his side. There was a huge crash followed by a loud explosion a few hundred yards away.
"Well there goes the bike." Said Wade.
"Told you it would crash." Said Wilson.
"Looks like we're hoofing it Bob." Said Deadpool.
"Hey Mr. Wilson where dose this Deathstroke guy live anyway?" Asked Bob.
"That is a really good question. Let me ask." Said Deadpool as he pulled out his cellphone and called the Watcher.
After a quick talk Deadpool got the address.
"Alright Bob onward with our awesome quest!" Said Deadpool.
The two of them walked off towards the city.
To be continued.