{Author's Note: Be for warned the following chapter contains: Violence, suggestive themes, possibly some strong language. Rating probably T. As always PLEASE be sure to view "Lucy" by xOxLxIxVxEx as that is the work that inspired this story. A huge massive ginormous THANK YOU to xOxLxIxVxEx for giving me permission to post this. :) Don't forget to Review after you read thank you thank you thank you and hope you enjoy! End Note}

Disclaimer: I Do Not Own Fairy Tail, if I did the Fairies would be ruling the world and whipping people with their totally awesome tails!

Chapter 2

After The Fall

After a month and a half...

Loke sat at the same dark corner table that he was always in. No fan girls, or anyone else for that matter, came near him. He spent every sunrise, and sunset at her grave, every day, rain, shine, or snow. The rest of the day, he did the same thing that he had been doing since the day Lucy died, which was getting as drunk as he could, and drawing every memory he had of her. He had a lot of memories of her. He was always watching her. More than a few times, when he shouldn't have been.

He didn't notice if being in her world hurt or not, mostly because nothing compared to the pain of her loss. He didn't care either way. He refused to go back. He knew that once he left he couldn't return until his key was found again. That would take a long time to happen, and he would want some very good answers to how the person got his key, seeing as it had been buried with Lucy. To tell the truth he wasn't sure that he wanted to come back ever again, but first he would have to leave.

Mirajane quietly picked up the empty mug, and replaced it with a fresh one. She sighed heavily.

"Ne, Loke?" she called gently.

"Hmm?" Loke looked up at her for the first time in over two weeks, "Yeah, Mira? Something wrong?"

Mira's chin trembled slightly as she forced a smile. She swallowed hard against the lump that had risen in her throat, "I was just wondering...if ...this is...really how you think... that...Lucy-sama would want you to honor her? She...really loved all of us. She, she would want us to be happy, and smile for her. She was always smiling," Mira choked finally, but she kept smiling even as the tears began to fall.

You couldn't speak Lucy's name in Loke's earshot without adding the honorific of sama. Failure to grant that respect would result in the full fury of The Lion. Neither Gajeel, nor Bixlow would dare to make that mistake twice, not and expect to live anyway. Loke wouldn't raise his hand to Mira, but she understood that it was his way of trying to move forward.

"I-I know," Loke whispered, "I'll smile for her when I can breathe again. I promise."

"Are you going to see Natsu in the hospital?" Mira changed the subject slightly.

"Didn't know he was there, but I doubt that he wants to see me," Loke replied, then drained half his glass in one pull before continuing, "What happened to him, anyway?"

"Gray caught him trying to...he tried to... kill himself last night," Mira's voice was shaking.

"Hmph, must be nice. At least he has that to look forward to, lucky bastard. I don't even have that much. I'll never get to see her again. No matter how many times I die. Next time you see Gray, tell him he's got a free bottle of anything he wants on me, as thanks for keeping that stupid dragon here with me," Loke retorted harshly, then finished off the mug in his hand, before returning to the latest sketch he was working on.

Mira blinked, and stared at him for a long moment before setting down two more mugs, and walking away with his empty glasses. She hadn't expected that reaction. She had expected him to get mad, and rush over to the hospital, but it seemed as though the news had only made him more bitter. Thinking through what he had just said as she worked behind the bar, she frowned deeply, and looked back at the slumped figure in the corner. A deep pang of sorrow rose up as she finally understood what he meant.

Loke was immortal. He would never die, he could never go to heaven, which is the only way he could ever see Lucy again. Her heart sank painfully.

Tears brimmed in Mira's eyes. He had truly loved Lucy. They had spoken of it many times, but he had never been able to convince Lucy of it. Now she was lost to him forever. And Loke had forever to regret that loss. Mirajane left the bar to find somewhere more private to shed her tears of sorrow at what her friend was facing.

A month later Natsu was released from the hospital to the care of Gray, and Erza. The doctors felt that he was emotionally stable enough again, but warned them to keep an eye on him, and not let him be alone for too long.

Happy had long since moved in with Gray. Natsu forgot about him all the time, never wanted to go anywhere with him. Happy felt like he couldn't talk to Natsu any more.

Gray understood. Gray would go fishing with Happy, and talk to him. Gray didn't get mad, and scream at him. Happy missed Lucy, she would have gone fishing with Happy. Lucy had never thrown anything at him. Natsu wasn't Natsu any more now that Lucy was gone. Happy was unhappy. Happy missed Lucy, but he missed Natsu more.

Natsu was dragged out on the first mission he had taken since the incident, by Erza, and Gray. He hated it. He couldn't even get excited about the three dozen thieves he was allowed to beat on. He did his part, and protected his Nakama, but it was clear to his team that his heart wasn't in the work.

After they returned to the guild, Gray tried to pick a fight with Natsu, just like old times. Natsu would only sigh brokenly, and put his head down on the table. Mira would bring food with a smile. She always brought his favorites. Nothing could get him the least bit worked up. He ate like every other miserable person. Slow, and uninterested. He had lost that love of life that had drawn so much attention before. He didn't even smile, never mind grin.

Natsu knew they didn't understand what he had lost. She was more than his Nakama. She was his girlfriend. The love of his life. He had dragged her on that mission. He had wanted the money for a house. It had been the perfect house. The property was like a giant rose garden. She loved roses. He was going to give her that house for her birthday. Natsu was going to have a ring made just for her. He was going to ask her to marry him in the rose garden of that house. He had never told anyone else. Not even Happy.

They didn't understand. No one understood. How could they? No one else loved his Lucy like he did. From the moment they had met they were saving each other. They were a team before they even knew each others names. She was the glow of his fire. He was the warmth of her smile. They had been fine alone, but they had been amazing together. They had fit so naturally, that now that she wasn't there, he felt empty, and cold.

Natsu lasted a mere three weeks after leaving the hospital. He woke for the millionth time that night, reaching out for her. She wasn't there. He couldn't stop dreaming about her laying next to him. He only slept from sheer exhaustion because of it. He closed his eyes, and a few minutes later he would wake reaching for her. He couldn't take it any more. It had been like this ever since he let her die. He didn't deserve to live. Not when he had failed to save her.

He had failed. He had failed when he was practically in the same damn room! That mage had even warned him. Natsu was told that Lucy wasn't safe. Even after being warned, even though he was so close, he failed her. He had as good as killed her himself, with his own hands.

"Liar! You said you loved her, but you lied! You LIED! If you loved her, you would have saved her. You would have listened, you would have gone to her. You let her die. You killed her. You killed Lucy, Natsu Dragneel!" Natsu screamed at himself as he sat curled in the corner of his small bedroom, "You killed her. You killed Lucy! Lucy... Lucy... Lucy..."