Sophomore year was a hard year, the work was harder and Kyle and Bebe would never ever separate, in class they would pass notes, at lunch they would play tongue hockey and Bebe started coming home with us to 'study'. This really fucking hurt because during summer holidays he started to ditch me for her and my infatuation with him was becoming very hard to deal with. Sophomore was also the year Cartman and Clyde came out and I told Kenny about my thing for Kyle.
.o.o.
"Hey, Kenny, can I talk to you?" It's the week after my sixteenth birthday it's also the day Kyle, Kenny and I have planned to go to California for the weekend. You see crazy Aunt Robyn became rather attached to me so she called my parents and now me and my friends are going to stay with her for the weekend.
"Sure, dude, what's up?" Kenny asks, we're sitting at the lunch table in the cafeteria waiting for Kyle to come from class.
"I, uhm I have a thing for, uh-"
"Kyle? Yeah, I know" I look at him shocked, how the hell does he know that? "It's pretty obvious, I mean you get excited when Kyle sits down and then you start to cringe when Bebe sits down next to him. And also I heard talking in the bathroom the other day." Kenny smiles and I frown, god damn it if he knows who else does?
"You're not gonna tell him, are you?" I ask. I hope to god that he's nice enough to obey my wish.
"Nah, it's your thing to-" Before Kenny could finish our attention was moved from our conversation to Cartman and Clyde standing on a table in the middle of the cafeteria.
"Fellow students, we have an announcement for you!" Everyone including myself was watching silently as Cartman continued to speak "I am gay for Clyde Donovan! And if any of you think of making any unwelcome comments about that, well screw you!" I wince as they share their first kiss in front of everyone.
Everybody starts to talk within their groups most likely about the two brunettes, Cartman and Clyde get off the table and start to walk towards our table. Shit, shit, shit I do not want to deal with Cartman, we hadn't exchanged words since I came back to South Park last year.
"Hey, poor boy, hippy, where's the Jew and his whore?" Cartman greets us as he and Clyde sit next to me, how could this day get any worse?
And just as if someone read my mind Kyle and Bebe sit next to Kenny and start making out like their lives depended on it.
"Hey, Kyle… Bebe." I greet trying my best to act casual but my words land on deaf ears apparently each other's moaning is more important. Screw 'em anyway, I've had enough of watch Kyle make out with Bebe so I stand up and walk out the cafeteria and to my next class.
.o.o.
It's finally the end of school and I'm walking home to back my bag for California, we're all going to meet at my place at four and if we keep rest stops to a minimum we'll be at crazy Aunt Robyn's place by midday tomorrow.
.o.o.
It's now two in the morning and guess who decided to tag along? No, it isn't Bebe, thank god, but Cartman. Kyle and Kenny are in the front of Kenny's van occasionally taking turns at driving so the other could rest. Cartman is snoring loud enough for people back in South Park to hear us, Kenny's driving and Kyle's sleeping soundly in the passenger seat.
"Ugh, Cartman, shut up!" I shout as I poke the fat boy with my finger.
"Aww is little wittle Stan cranky?" Kenny teases from the front of the van, Kenny being the oldest in the group and me being the youngest has decided it would be 'fun' if he treated me like a three year old.
"I don't know, why don't you come check, grandpa" I laugh, just as he was about to respond Kenny hit the brakes and ducks in his seat. And to my amazement an arrow flies through his open window and gets stuck in his chair.
"Fuck! Kyle, Kyle, wake up" Kenny nudges Kyle awake which seems to annoy the red head.
"Whadda ya want, Kenny?" Kyle asks as he turns to the blonde, he immediately sees the arrow and unbuckles his seatbelt. They both switch places and Kyle begins to drive as Kenny drifts off, only minutes later and I myself start to nod off.
.o.o.
"Stanley!" I'm awoken by the screech of my Aunt Robyn, apparently we've arrived at her place.
"Hi, Aunt Robyn" I greet tiredly, she reaches across and pulls me out of my seat and suffocates me in a tight hug. Aunt Robyn is about thirty six and I have no idea how she knows my parents but I never question what happens in our family anymore since the Easter bunny incident. She has long brown hair that sit above her shoulders, she's really skinny and she loves denim a little too much.
"Stanley, I've been talking with your friends and they seem rather hesitant to use the outhouse so they're using the toilet in the home" What the fuck? I just arrive and this is our first conversation? "But you have to keeping using it alright?"
"Ugh, fine" I sigh, why can't I use a real toilet?
"Don't give me attitude, Stanley!" Aunt Robyn scolds, well she loves her god damn outhouse. I don't.
"Yes, Aunt Robyn" I shift nervously and go to the back of the van and grab my bags only just realising that the other three were watching us and are cracking up "Shut up and get inside"
.o.o.
It's now six o'clock and we're all eating dinner around a tiny table and I'm squashed between Cartman and Kenny, trust me it's not nice. Kenny's perverted so all the whole time we've been eating he keeps rubbing my leg and pissing me off and apparently Cartman's never heard of deodorant.
"So, boys what are your plans for after college?" Aunt Robyn asks, the guys have taken a liking to her and immediately start to talk.
"Well I want to become a lawyer like my father and settle down in Denver with my girlfriend Bebe" Kyle explains, they haven't even been together a year and he thinks it's gonna last forever! I really love Kyle like a lot and I'm willing to wait forever for him if I have to but this is just torture always about him and Bebe. I always thought I was the guy who would settle down with two point five kids and a dog.
"That sounds marvellous, Kyle, what about you, Eric?" Cartman smiles evilly, he's gonna make himself sound so innocent, I hate and admire his skills sometimes.
"Well I was thinking of opening up my own diner in South Park, y'know? So I can stay in touch with the small town and not have my mind poisoned by big cities that have lost their simple ways."
Okay you want to know what pisses me off about that? First, he already said he's going to sign up for the army when he's out of school and second of all he just pulled a bunch of bullshit out his ass and my aunt looks like she's in love.
"That's beautiful, Eric, you're such a nice young man. Now, Kenny, what about you?" Did Aunt Robyn just wipe away a tear? It's just about a fucking diner in South Park, what's so great about that? I swear women can be a bit too emotional sometimes.
"I'm not going to college." Kenny says nonchalantly as he continues eating his meal of macaroni and cheese.
"Why not, honey?" Aunt Robyn asks sadly, oh yeah she doesn't know about his 'financial situation'.
"I'm poor and I just want to keep working with my brother Kevin as a mechanic."
"Oh, well, Stanley, do you have plans yet?"
'To win over Kyle and fuck him'
"Uhm, well I want to be a wedding planner" Everyone looks at me like I'm nuts and Cartman is sniggering along with Kenny "Yeah I know, real cliché a gay guy wanting to be a wedding planner. But I just think it would be wonderful to help couples have a beautiful wedding and watch them be happy on their wedding day"
They all keep staring at me and my aunt silently starts to pick up the empty plates and goes into the kitchen as Kenny and Cartman start to burst out laughing.
"Dude, a wedding planner?" Cartman laughs, I simply frown and flip him off.
.o.o.
It's one in the morning and I snuck into the bathroom to have a shower, because crazy Aunty Robyn thinks it's better for me to have a bath instead, so I just said screw it and waited until now to have one. I've just gotten out and I'm staring at my long hair in the mirror, it's past my shoulders now but I made a promise to myself, I won't cut my hair until Kyle Broflovski is mine.
"Stan?" I turn around to see Kyle standing by the door, he looks really, really tired and really, really sad.
"What is It, Kyle?" I ask, I didn't think I was so loud in the shower to wake him up.
"C-Clyde just texted me" What does this have to do with anything? "Bebe she-she promised to wait 'til we were seventeen a-and... She slept with Token" Oh.
Kyle burst into tears and falls to the ground, I walk over and rub his back while he cries.
"It's alright, Kyle, you are too good for her anyway" He looks up at me and before I know it he's kissing me!
Jesus Christ! What's he doing?
"Oh god! Stan, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean that" Kyle says as he pulls away "I guess it was like a kinda rebound to get back at her. I shouldn't use you like that." Kyle panics, I knew straight away that this would happen, I'm a rebound but I don't care, a kiss is a kiss, right?
"S'alright, Kyle." I smile while inside I'm crying like a baby.
.o.o.
I'm quickly loading all our stuff into Kenny's van as fast as possible, about half an hour ago at six this morning Kyle was called by his father and was told that Ike was taking a turn for the worst.
"Everything in there, Stan?" Aunt Robyn asks.
"Yeah, sorry our visit was cut short. I'll come to see you soon" I wave goodbye as we start to drive away, Kenny is driving and Kyle is sobbing next to him. I warned Cartman earlier that if he said a thing I would break his fat leg.
"Kyle, everything's going to be alright. Ike's a fighter" I say sadly trying to reassure my friend but he keeps crying. It breaks my heart to see him so upset, I just want to help but shutting up seems the best thing to right now.
.o.o.
Unfortunately at eleven that evening ten year old Ike Broflovski passed away. Kyle was distraught he'd just lost his girlfriend and little brother. Gerald and Sheila took Kyle in again, they were so upset by Ike's passing that they couldn't stand to be too far away from Kyle.
That Christmas Kenny started going out with Heidi Turner and you wouldn't think it from looking at them but they were the happiest couple you could ever see. Of course when you see them at school it just looks like they're all about sex but by themselves they're loving and romantic. I wish I had that with Kyle.
Bebe eventually sucked up to Kyle enough and they got back together on Kyle's seventeenth birthday, August thirteenth Kyle and Bebe had sex for the first time and I broke down and ended up with Kenny staying with me for a week so I wouldn't dive out a window or become 'emo pussy Stan'.
I never cut my hair that sophomore year; Kyle wasn't mine so it continued to grow.