Author's Note - I literally suck. I'm so sorry about not getting this chapter out sooner, but I was seriously stuck on how I wanted this to go… angsty or family/funny? I've decided on family/funny because I really just don't do angst, it's just not me. I'm an immature goofball. Also school starts in a week and I wanna diiiiiieeeeeeeeeee. EVEN IF YOU THINK AUTHORS NOTES ARE STUPID, READ THE FOLLOWING - it's important to understanding the story. First, all of Peter's internal dialogue will be in italics. I got the idea of have him inject his thoughts into the story from the cartoon show Ultimate Spider Man. Second, idk what the composition of the Avengers team is after the events of Civil War …. So for the sake of the story, let's just pretend that the accords faded into oblivion and the whole team made up. It may get a bit uncomfortable sometimes, but hey, that's what group therapy is for! Any Whooooo, 3, 2, 1, ACTION!

(Peter's POV)

When Aunt May marched into the conference room, the temperature instantly dropped 10 degrees. Her eyes seemed to burn holes into each Avenger as she glared around the room angrily, seemingly unfazed by the fact that the most powerful beings on the planet were simply sitting before her in stunned silence. I jumped as she turned to me and pushed me down, probably a bit harder than what was necessary, into a chair in the corner of the room. Really, really? Time out in the corner? Come on! This is so embarrassing, they are all staring at me….

"If I hear one peep out of you, mister," May snarled, "you can kiss you X-Box goodbye. It's time for the adults to have a little chat." I gulped. This was about to get uglier than Red-Skull in a drag competition. Eeeewwww. Just thinking about that makes me what to hurl.

"May! How food to se-"

SLAP

Time froze. The air was heavy and still, like before a storm. Any sound that had previously existed in the room was dead. Mr. Stark stood before Aunt May with a red hand mark already forming on his face. Seated at the conference table Black Widow and Hawkeye looked like they were struggling to contain laughter, but honestly I don't really know. Super spies are good at hiding emotions, it's kinda their job. Captain America, getting punched by him was like, the coolest thing ever btw, just seemed shocked and Falcon was grinning smugly. Scarlet Witch was just drinking her coffee non-nonchalantly while Vision seemed . . . uuuhhhh. I don't know, really. His face seemed to show a weird mix of approval, satisfaction, understanding, and mild concern? And the growing dude (who's name I never really learned) just seemed confused.

"Yup, I probably deserved tha-"

SLAP

Ooh, I winced, double wammie. Ouch.

"YOU DARE SPEAK TO ME AFTER THIS?!" she screamed, gesturing wildly to me. I just fiddled with the mask in my hands as everybody stared at me. Please stop. Please stop. Oh dear god, I want to sink into the ground and die. This is so embarrassing. "JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? HE IS 15! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS, STARK? DO YOU!? THAT MEANS HE IS JUST A KID, MY KID!"

Mr. Stark was now visibly flinching as Aunt May's face got redder and redder.

"BUT, NOOOOOOOOO!" she continued, mocking sarcasm poisoning her words, "THE RICH AND POWERFUL IRON MAN KNOWS BEST! TRUST IN HIS GREAT JUDGEMENT, HECK, HE MIGHT EVEN DRESS YOUR KID UP AND THROW HIM IN WITH THE WORLD'S MOST DANGEROUS FREAK SHOW!" she paused, and the only sound in the room was her heavy breathing. "What do you have to say for yourself, you rich, arrogant, as-"

"-inine, egotistical, careless, impulsive, and bone headed."

I looked up from my corner of shame to see that Vision had stood from his seat at the table to dangerously interrupt Aunt May.

"What?" May asked, blinking in confusion. It was almost like she had forgotten that she and Mr. Stark were not the only one in the room during her tirade.

"All of these terms have been used to describe Tony," Vision stated simply.

"I wasn't going to say asinine, but yes," she responded shooting a death glare at Mr. Stark.

"And there are hundreds more colorful words in English and languages around the world that would accurately describe Tony." As the android continued, May seemed to, dare I say it, relax. His deep, but calm and soothing voice seemed to ease the tension suffocating the room. I was just glad that Aunt May had stopped yelling. "Words can only accomplish so much, Ms. Parker, and your boy is something that one must see to believe." What? I'm literally right here. Not invisible.

"What is that even supposed to mean, Mr. No-Offense-But-I-Don't-Even-Know-Your-Name?" May asked snarkily, mirroring my own thoughts.

"I would like to invite you and Peter to the training room, Ms. Parker," explained Vision without really explaining anything.

"Why the hell not?" said Aunt May throwing her hands in the air with exasperation.

The Christmas colored android floated out of the room with Aunt May at his side. I quickly scurried out of my chair and followed them out the door with the rest of the Avengers following suite.

"What's going on again?" Growing Dude whispered to the group. Nobody answered, but they were probably all thinking the same thing that I was . . . I have no freaking clue, I just hope Vision does.

Author's Note - I really am not happy with this piece. I'm just stuck in the pit of "for-some-reason-all-of-my-ideas-are-crap-right-now", so I'm sorry. I know this was short, but I honestly just wanted to finish it before it became verbal diarrhea. Hopefully the next chapter will be better, but I seriously need suggestion and help, so hit me with anything and everything you got (rotten food and dog poop excluded). Be back soon, and don't forget to live with love!

XOXOXO - fastgirl01