— 1 —

Introductions

He had given the order, assembled the team. He was responsible.

The beacon had been lost.

"So, you're saying that the beacon was damaged in the firefight following Major Alenko's arrival?" Shepard repeated, voice blank and face all neutral. "And he was caught up in some sort of a... what was it? ray of light coming from the beacon?"

Jacob Taylor nodded, accepting the scrutiny without blinking. "Spectre Alenko passed out, and the beacon self-destructed. I ordered a retreat, but stayed behind for a minute, and before the Alliance got Alenko out he woke up and kept saying something about Protheans and war. He was pretty delirious, and I left. Harvey managed to intercept another Alliance transmission on our way back however, and it seems Alenko might have received some sort of a vision from the beacon."

Shepard listened, carefully weighing his fellow operative's words. "A vision about Protheans and war? Is that what you're saying?"

Taylor shrugged, but when Shepard watched closely, he could see this was exactly what the man was suggesting.

"Studies suggest Protheans vanished after a huge galactic civil war. Maybe this beacon is a warning left by someone who saw it coming and hoped to warn everyone?" It wasn't a lot, but it was a theory; and really, it wasn't Shepard's place to guess, anyway. "In any case, I'll speak with the Illusive Man. I trust you did everything you could."

Taylor nodded and saluted, leaving Shepard to figure out how he was going to survive this particular failure. I should have gone, he thought for the fifth time in the past five minutes despite knowing perfectly well that Taylor had been an obvious choice, and better suited for a mission involving impersonating an Alliance officer and cheating them into giving them the beacon willingly anyway; he just couldn't get rid of the feeling his presence could have changed something.

At least he would have something else but second-hand knowledge on the issue now.

With a sigh, Shepard brought up his omnitool and requested a meeting. The Illusive Man wasn't exactly reasonable, but he wasn't stupid, and he had been good for Shepard ever since Cerberus had rescued him from the batarians after... after what had happened, back then.

So, Shepard, he imagined the Illusive Man saying, the Prothean beacon. And he would explain: There were complications, and the other man would light a cigarette and remind him of how much he owed Cerberus even without losing major archeological findings. It was emotionally manipulative, but it was also something Shepard had gotten used to by now. The head of Cerberus knew which strings to pull to get results.

It didn't take long for the Illusive Man to reply, to call Shepard in, and the conversation went like anticipated; Shepard calmly taking the brunt of his silent treatment when he went through Taylor's written report, and finally the name rolling off his tongue: Shepard. Shepard standing to attention, face showing nothing; the Illusive Man telling him losing this beacon is very bad for humanity, and Shepard knowing perfectly well he was being judged.

"I don't see how I could have prevented this from happening," he said, not flinching when the older man dumped the cigarette on the ashtray with more force than necessary.

"I see," was all he got as an answer.

Shepard waited, keeping his posture straight and proud. Eventually, the Illusive Man would let go and move forward; acknowledge the last part of Taylor's story.

In 15 minutes, he did.

"If Alenko received something from the beacon, all might not be lost," he said more to himself than to Shepard, skimming through the report again. Shepard brought up his omnitool and made a connection to the Illusive Man's holographic screens to send a few files for them to look at.

"Taylor forwarded me everyone's reports on this. All of them state the same thing." He highlighted everything concerning the beacon and Spectre Alenko; six paragraphs of text and the whole Alliance transmission intercepted by Harvey Green, all there right in front of their eyes. "I can bring him to Cerberus for questioning. Green is working on determining Alenko's whereabouts right now."

The Illusive Man ignored the files and stared at him, an inscrutable look in his prosthetic eyes. "It would gain unnecessary attention if the only human Spectre just disappeared."

Shepard shrugged. "What choice do we have? All that's left of that beacon is in Alenko's head. We need him if we want to have that intel." He pointed at a line of text right next to him. "'Major Alenko needs immediate medical attention.' Sounds like he's hospitalized. Probably on Citadel, somewhere."

"And what, exactly, are you planning on doing after finding him?" The man lit another cigarette, and for a second Shepard just wanted to snatch it and stamp on it.

He, of course, resisted the urge. "Maybe it's too risky to try anything, but I could go meet him. Try to earn his trust. And when he's cleared, it would be easier for me to get him alone and capture him without a fight."

Shepard didn't even know why he felt so strongly about this. It was a chance to make up to losing the beacon, of course, and a way back to the Illusive Man's good graces, but that didn't really require him to go meet the guy and ― whatever it was that he was even suggesting. Making friends? Asking him out?

"In any case, I could keep an eye on him."

The Illusive Man stared at him some more, smoke swirling from his cigarette. Eventually, he sighed, grumbling, "Fine. I don't have time for this." Grumbling.

Shepard took it as his cue to leave.

—

Finding the first human Spectre hadn't been that hard. The man had checked ― or, had been checked ― in Huerta Memorial Hospital with his own name, and it didn't take much to walk to the front desk and ask for Kaidan Alenko. Are you a reporter? was the only thing the receptionist asked, and when he replied no he was clear to go.

It was pretty lousy, in his opinion.

Excessive headaches and nightmares, was pretty much all there had been on the hospital's file concerning the Spectre; no mention of a Prothean artifact, and nothing on the nature of his nightmares — what he had been dreaming of and how vividly. Those were probably not on any files, anyway; not yet, at least not before Alenko was in the shape to write everything down for the Alliance and the Council.

He had been researching Kaidan Alenko before he had left the Cerberus headquarters. The man was a boy scout if there ever was one; an Alliance soldier to the core. A powerful biotic, enlisted at the age of 22; lots of commendations and promotions in the following years, current rank Major; and then there was the recently acquired Spectre status. To say the man's career was impressive was an understatement.

[ Scene illustrated by Sammvitch (replace the _ with . because FFnet is being a jerk with the links): sammvitch_tumblr_com/post/34972879582/art-based-on-and-created-for-hard-fall-by-shajs ]

Shepard paused at the doorway, looking through the glass door at the hospital room with a neatly made bed and a large window. The Spectre was standing near it, gazing at the Presidium; straight, strong back against a beautiful view, hands resting on the railing separating the room from the glass. White sweatpants, a loose t-shirt; clothes that were not meant to flatter anyone but the man looked great anyway.

Suddenly, Shepard felt a bit unsure of himself. Not that he admitted it; not to himself, anyway. Instead, he kept staring for a moment longer, allowing his eyes to roam over the Spectre's backside like they were in Purgatory instead of the best hospital in the Citadel.

But he doubted anyone could blame him for taking a moment to admire the... View.

He stepped into the door's sensor's radar and it opened with a swooshing sound. Alenko turned, maybe expecting a nurse or a doctor; and when he saw Shepard, he froze for a second, brown eyes taking in the sight of the man closing in. Shepard didn't care; instead, he walked to the window, making sure to brush his shoulder against Alenko's when he leaned on the railing.

Alenko didn't move.

"A nice view," Shepard commented, half-heartedly looking at the people coming and going quite a few floors down. Not really seeing them, of course; he wasn't interested in what was happening somewhere to some random people not wearing soft-looking sweatpants and closed expression just at the edge of his personal space.

Alenko didn't reply, not right away at least; after a while he settled back next to him though, and Shepard enjoyed the tension. The Spectre's presence made him feel warmer, and there was certain gravity ― like something existing between a moon and the planet it was orbiting, if that was not a terribly corny thing to say.

Eventually, Alenko shifted and said, yeah. Then there was another silence ― a couple of long minutes of silence, and Shepard didn't push. Instead he took pleasure in having the upper hand, of being the one to know the drill and hold the cards. He could see Alenko staring at him in his peripheral vision, and the corner of his mouth quirked to a small smirk.

So, tell me. What's a handsome Spectre like you doing in a place like this? he wanted to say, and he turned his head; met Alenko's eyes half-way and opened his mouth, only the line didn't feel like an appropriate opening line anymore.

The metaphor about planets and moons was not accurate, he realized, as a star and a planet would have made so much more sense. Not that it was like staring at a sun, to watch this Spectre so close ― but there was something that made it hard to look into those eyes, now that his face was within reach. Gentle and expressive, his eyes were, like they hadn't seen any of the fighting it must have taken him to reach the rank Major, let alone the Spectre status; and Shepard couldn't help averting his gaze after a heartbeat of eye contact, an awkward feeling taking him by surprise.

"Did you need something?" Alenko asked, not exactly friendly but far from cold, and there was a hint of amusement in his voice. Shepard cursed inwardly for being so obvious, only now remembering to shut his mouth. He scrambled for an excuse ― completely forgetting why he had come at all.

"Yeah," he managed, leaving it at that.

Alenko waited, and even if he felt awkward his face didn't show much. A great poker face, surely ― one to match Shepard's own, if they ever sat down to play. A round of Skyllian Five, he added in his mind, not the game we're playing now, because something tells me I'm losing. Nevertheless, it was not like he allowed it to stop him; instead, he decided to raise the stakes and plunge head-first forward, hoping to stagger and win.

It had suddenly become a high risk, high reward kind of mission, and a very personal one at that.

Shepard inched closer, causing Alenko to cross his arms over his chest and lean his back on the railing.

"You know, I knew you were a biotic the moment I saw you. There was this certain pull, you could say." Shepard said calmly, raising his eyes to meet Alenko's; this time knowing well enough what to expect. Or not ― the man was full of surprises, it seemed. Usually Shepard was such a good judge of character, but now he had been thrown off his game.

The corner of Alenko's mouth twitched. "Or you've watched the news lately."

"That, too," Shepard shrugged and gave the man a smile. It seemed like his gambling was paying off, or then Alenko stopped himself from grimacing instead of grinning. It was certainly possible ― at least if he counted out the slight crinkling around the man's eyes.

The Spectre has a sense of humor, he thought idly. Who knew.

He extended his hand, waiting for Alenko to grab it. Palm to palm; a strong grip on an equally firm hold.

"Shepard," he introduced himself.

"Kaidan," came the reply.

Shepard didn't let go, not of his hand and definitely not of his eyes, and Alenko ― Kaidan, now, was the first to back down. It might not have been a victory, but it felt like one.

"So," Shepard started, only to have Kaidan ― and that's a nice name if there ever was one, he thought randomly ― chuckle and breathe, "Yeah."

It was definitely not something he had been expecting.

This whole meeting ― something was definitely off when a man like Shepard was reduced back to the awkward teen trying to impress the boy from his class. The boy he had, in the end, managed to impress ― but that was unrelated. Want to make out? would not have worked if they had been older than fifteen.

"Want to go out?" he blurted instead, not thinking about the Illusive Man or the Protheans or the single gray strand of hair right there next to Kaidan's ear. Then his ears turned red when he realized what he had said, and there was this brief moment of desperate need to jump through the glass.

Instead of committing impromptu suicide, he kept staring at the Spectre's face, keeping his own as straight as possible. It was pretty much the only thing that he could do to save face at this point; to separate his current 29-year-old adult self from the kid that had accidentally bitten his classmate's lower lip when they had been caught in the act. And it paid off; there were changes in Kaidan's demeanor, eyes blinking in surprise and mouth opening just a little, and he knew his blundering had just tipped the balance to his favor.

"Uh," Kaidan said.

It took conscious effort for Shepard to stop himself from grinning at that. "There is this great place at the Presidium," he suggested. "Great food and plenty of good lagers to choose from, I hear. A friend of mine recommended their steak sandwiches."

Kaidan closed his mouth and pursed his lips, and Shepard couldn't help noticing the barely visible scars; the big one starting below his nose and crossing his lips, ending before reaching his chin, and the smaller, horizontal one touching his lower lip.

It was distracting.

"This, uh," Kaidan cleared his throat. "This conversation has been the weirdest thing I have experienced in a long time. And I did take a big hit to the head a while back."

This time, Shepard grinned, crossing his arms on his chest. "I don't like to be predictable."

"I... Can see that. Shepard." Alenko tore his eyes off the other man's face, glancing at the room around them; and Shepard could see him thinking, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly. He knew the guy would turn him down a moment before he truly responded, speaking in a hushed voice, and when Kaidan turned to leave, Shepard let him. Think about it, Kaidan was all he said; and the Spectre glanced at him, looking slightly lost.

It was disappointing, of course, but hardly a surprise, and Kaidan's line now is not a good time was vague enough to convince Shepard the man was not really against the idea. It made him wonder if there was something he didn't know, though ― if Alenko was going to be sent on another mission already, or if there was something else he should have been aware of. He was here on Cerberus' behalf, after all, no matter how the man made him feel.

Shrugging, Shepard laid his eyes on Kaidan's back, finding out that staying behind the Spectre wasn't a bad place to be at all.