Tommy paced his office waiting for Barbara to arrive. He had contemplated appearing on her doorstep at dawn, but that tactic had failed so miserably last night, he dared not risk it in case he made everything worse.

He had been awake all night worrying about what had happened. His original intention had been to drive over, tell her he loved her and hopefully find she reciprocated. Instead, he had lost his nerve each time she had not answered her door. Foolishly he had stopped for a drink, bought a bottle, and true to form his night had unravelled. Tommy had been mortified to find her knocking on his car window. He should have stopped there or only chatted to her, gone inside and watched television. He should have invited her out and romanced her, not agreed that he had expected to, what was her term? Jump each other. He groaned and ran his hand through his hair. "Lynley, you're a fool."

His only consolation was that she had responded with equal hunger. She had admitted she loved him. He doubted that had vanished, even if she was angry with him. He hoped that his small gesture on her desk showed her he did care.

He had almost worn a rut in his carpet by the time she walked in half an hour late. He peered carefully through the Venetian blinds on his window between his office and the squad room. Barbara threw her bag under the desk, then noticed his gift. A small, brown teddy bear sat in front of her computer on a heart-shaped box of chocolates. Clasped in its paws was a single red rose. Tommy had placed a small card between the bear's legs. After debating for hours what to write, he had kept it simple: I'm sorry, Barbara. I was gauche and foolish. Please give me a second chance to prove how much I love you. Tommy xxx. Underneath he had drawn a little heart with their initials and crossed by an arrow.

From his office, he could not see her face, but he saw her slip the chocolates into her bag, move the bear next to the photo of her brother, and put the rose in her coffee cup. That seemed positive. He saw her open the envelope and read the card and shake her head. She glanced quickly at his office. He stepped back from the window but knew she had seen him. The card went into her bag, and she logged on to her computer, making no attempt to come to him.

He had considered all possibilities for her reaction. In his best scenario, she would come to his office, lock the door and fall into his arms. Clearly, that was not going to happen. Neither was the next best one where she would knock, come in and talk to him and hopefully end up in his embrace. At least she had not pulled the arms and legs off the bear and thrown the chocolates at him, as he had envisaged in his worst version of her reaction. Now he had to revert to Plan B.

He closed his Venetians then opened his door. "Barbara, may I have a quick word?"

She walked slowly into his office and sat down in his visitor's chair. "Yes?"

He sat on the edge of his desk in front of her. "We need to discuss last night."

"I got your apology. Thanks." Her face and voice were neutral. It was a behaviour she had cultivated over the years to keep her true feelings from the likes of Hillier. Tommy hated that she now used that defence on him.

"And?"

"Nice chocolates. Cute bear."

"I meant what my note said."

"That you behaved like an Argentine cowboy?"

"What?"

"You said you had been gauche."

Tommy smiled, despite the situation. "The pampas cowboys are gauchos."

"Because they're gauche?"

"Maybe," he agreed, not wanting her to feel foolish. He leant towards her. "I handled last night very poorly. I got carried away. I didn't intend to force myself."

"I know. I won't accuse you of anything. It was consensual. I didn't change my mind. It just wasn't meant to be that way."

"Maybe it had to be. We had a decade of desire and need and love that needed an outlet."

"We fucked, Tommy. Where was the love?"

Tommy sat upright. He paused before answering, knowing what he said could be crucial to their future. "In every frenzied kiss. In every touch of your skin and lips against mine. In every thrust. In the way you came around me and the way I pumped into you. It may seem crude in those terms, but it was still love."

Barbara looked down and fiddled with the hem of her jumper. "I felt cheap, Tommy. As if I was the school whore behind the bike shed. What made it worse was that it was good. I shouldn't have enjoyed that, but I did."

"Oh Barbara, you weren't a whore, and I'm sorry I made you feel that way. Sometimes... well, sometimes you just need that. There's no shame in it. I enjoyed it too, enormously, but if you had let me stay, I would have made love to you slowly, the way you imagined it would be."

She looked up and frowned. "But you already... had your fill."

He laughed softly. "Till the day I die, I'll never have my fill of you. The more I have, the more I want. I wasn't lying when I said I love you. I wasn't exaggerating when I said I want to marry you. I admit that my suggestion of becoming lovers was clumsy and foolish, but in my wildest dreams, I never thought you'd agree to marry me without... being convinced I love you."

"You could have done that by inviting me out somewhere other than the pub and maybe kissing me goodnight once or twice. You could have given me some clues, Tommy. Instead, you turn up drinking, then almost order me to become your lover. What I hated most was that I wanted that. I was happy to settle for something less than perfect because it was you. It made me feel cheap."

Tommy moved closer to her. "I know. I understood that as soon as you asked me to leave. I wanted to show it wasn't true but I was too scared to insist on staying. I'm sorry, Barbara."

She gave him a savage look. "Then why are you grinning?"

"Because you've called me Tommy three times. Hearing my name after all these years... It makes me happy."

"Hardly seems any point calling you Sir now that we've fucked."

Tommy felt stabbed through the heart. "Don't say that. We still made love. It was just more urgent."

"Fucked, shagged, screwed... it just satisfied a primal need."

"No! We didn't pick each other up at a nightclub. We may not have spent months dating, but we know each other better than other couples do in a lifetime. And that's why you know this is much more than sex for you too. I want you in my bed from tonight for the rest of time. I am not ashamed to admit that. I want you to marry me and share everything. What are you afraid of Barbara? That you want that too?"

She looked down and sighed. "Can we start again?"

"Yes. Have dinner with me tonight."

Barbara bit her bottom lip. "Okay."

"I'll pick you up at seven thirty."

She nodded then left his office. Tommy had hope.

He changed his mind about where to take her three times before he settled on a gastro pub in Pimlico. It was unpretentious and casual but stylish enough to impress. He arrived early but waited until exactly seven thirty before he knocked on her door. Barbara answered promptly. She was dressed in black, flared trousers and a soft, flowing, charcoal silk shirt. It matched his mid-grey suit and blue shirt which looked suitably casual without a tie.

"You look lovely," he said as he extended his arm to escort her to the waiting cab.

"Thanks," she mumbled. She did not return the compliment verbally, but he noticed the appreciative look as her eyes ran over him.

"I thought we'd go to Pimlico tonight. I made bookings at Zanotti's."

Barbara smiled tightly. "Sounds nice."

Tommy chatted about the weather and the much-needed rain the was due overnight. Barbara was quiet, and he sensed she was anxious about their first official date. "Are you nervous?"

"A bit. It seems weird knowing this is a date."

"We've eaten together hundreds of times."

She smiled. "I know, but last night changed everything, Tommy."

"For the better. You'll see."

After her first pint, Barbara relaxed. They started to talk about familiar subjects, and soon the tension was gone. The settled back into their usual banter and companionship. The atmosphere and meal were perfect. Barbara seemed comfortable sitting close to him in their little booth, shielded from other booths, but still within the hubbub of passing patrons and the noise from the bar.

Between courses, Tommy put his arm around her back. After dessert, he felt confident enough to kiss her cheek lightly. "Fancy a walk?"

"Yeah, that'd be nice. Walk off that Chocolate Hazelnut Meringue Cake."

"And half my Lemon Myrtle Cheesecake," he added, nudging her gently in the ribs.

"That was yummy. The flavour was unusual but tasty."

"It comes from a tree that grows in sub-tropical Queensland, in Australia. You can buy the dried leaves in the market."

"I can't cook."

"Well, we can make one together. On the weekend."

"Okay." Barbara smiled at him in a way that made his pulse race and stop simultaneously.

It was a cool but pleasant autumn evening. They meandered through St George's Square and strolled towards the river. Under the overhanging trees, Tommy took her hand like any other lovers. He gripped her harder as they dashed across Grosvenor Road. The large trees that lined the bank of the Thames made it seem as if they were a world away from the city. He put his arm around her shoulder as they leant against the stone wall overlooking the river and Vauxhall. Barbara looked up at him and smiled.

This time, Tommy did not rush their kiss. He started with the barest of touches. Barbara was the first to try to force his lips apart. He let her and enjoyed their gentle interplay. Gradually, almost imperceptibly, their kissed deepened. His arms enfolded her, and she had hers under his coat and around his waist, clenching his shirt in her fist.

Tommy let her explore his mouth. He could feel that heat from her face against his cheek, and for the first time tonight her noticed her subtle scent that she must have dabbed behind her ears. He slowly forced her tongue back and sighed loudly when she pressed her body hard against him.

When he heard Big Ben strike ten o'clock, he realised they had been kissing for over half an hour. He did not want to stop. He never wanted to stop. As they paused for air, he held her head against his neck and nuzzled his face into her hair. He groaned when Barbara began to suck gently below his ear.

"Barbara?"

"Yours. It's closer."

"I was going to say; I love you."

Barbara laughed. "I love you too, Tommy."

"Then marry me."

They stared into each other's eyes for a long time. All her arguments were countered by him. Eventually, she smiled and nodded. "Yes, but take me home now and..."

"Don't you dare say that. I'm going to take you home and make love with you just the way we should."