Title: Rudolph the Drunken Reindeer?
Disclaimer: Did you miss the fact that this is fan fiction?
Pairing: SasuNaru
Song: "Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer"
Rating: PG (K+)

A/N: This fic is dedicated to the T-Man, who happens to be the 'toast' man. He probably isn't knowledgeable of his own nicky, but he has one. And it is T-Man. Anyways, it's also dedicated to his girlfriend, Goth Barbie. I lurve them both, and sadly, neither of them are on fan fiction. -tear- -tear-
Before we begin, in case you didn't catch it, Neji's caged bird seal had been taken off. 'Cos I'm softy.
Okay. This one is a silly fic.

00000

Sasuke crossed his arms, his back turned to his blond friend. "No. I am not dressing up in a costume." Of course, the only reply to that one from the whiskered Kyuubi container was a 'why not?', which only managed to elicite a 'hn' from his companion's lips.

"Please?" Naruto hit his knees begging in the middle of the store. He'd had his own costume thought up and bought months ago. He pushed out his lower lips in hopes of swaying the taller, dark-haired boy.

"I'm not dressing up in a costume," he repeated. "Besides, even if I was going to, I wouldn't wear that." His nose wrinkled. That fabric was far too... too... Ugh. There weren't enough bad words in the universe to explain how bad the fabric, the stitchings, the everything was. He looked at the rack. "It's a hand-me-down..." he murmured. He didn't like the feel of other people's clothings on his body. Well, save for the blond's. He touched his hand to the cotton tee that hugged his chest.

"But... But..."

Sasuke held a hand up, disreguarding any of Naruto's begs, pleads, and far-too-cute-for-his-own-good studder. He looked over at the blond. "I'm afraid, since I have no costume, I can't go."

Sakura, Ino and TenTen, who were standing not too far off, looked at one another. If Sasuke, the lady-killer and number one---and a half--- bachelor wasn't going, their party was a slump for sure! Ino put her brain to work and walked out towards Naruto and Sasuke, tapping a hand on the blond's shoulder.

"If Sasuke-kun doesn't go, then you're not invited either, Naruto. Sorry," she mentioned, turning on her heel and walking away.

His jaw dropped. This was his way to being the number one---and, thus, the other half--- bachelor of Konohagakure. He stared at the blond's back then turned his eyes to Sasuke. Tears formed at the corners of his eyes. "Please?" He wasn't just begging anymore. He was on the verge of tears.

The dark-haired boy glanced at him, rolling his eyes before grumbling a 'if Itachi hadn't...' before agreeing with a curt nod, followed by an "if something bad happens, you lose your head!"

The blond grinned and nodded, at least, not before mentioning that he could, if he wanted, cut off all their access to the porn they had an abundance of. His eyes widened. Naruto wouldn't do something like that. Besides, if the sacred item was hidden, Naruto was so predictable that he'd be able to find it and take it back. "Fine... You get to keep your head," he murmured between clenched teeth.

00000

Hours passed, Sasuke stood with his arms crossed as he leaned against a wall of Sakura's apartment. It was a tight squeaze. Fangirls, fanboys, Rookie Nine, sensei, and all of the sanin, including the Hokage herself. He looked around for a glimmer of blond, but when he grabbed the arm of who he thought was Naruto, he was struck in the face with a rather expensive purse, Guchi if he remembered correctly. Then again, with the head injury, he wasn't sure if he'd ever recover. He rubbed his cheek and a flash of yellow hair and white teeth came into his vision.

"Come on!" he called, tugging the leash attatched to the jingling collar.

Against his will, Sasuke was dragged across the room to be joined with a different group of people. Particularly, a very taken Nara Shikamaru and his well-endowed girlfriend, Hyuuga Hinata, dressed as Santa and Mrs. Clause; Ino and Sakura giggling with one another dressed as elfs, pointy ears and all; TenTen, pressing her fingers to Neji's forehead, and Neji, obviously, dressed as a little girl in her pajamas and a very angry little boy; it was hard to tell who was playing whom.

Naruto grinned, holding the leash close to him. "Happy Christmas," he chimed, tugging on the leather strap. Sasuke glared at the blond before making his own statement of the holiday at hand.

Shikamaru's eyes widened as he looked between the two. Talk about kinky. He stifled a laugh, which Sasuke caught almost instantaniously. "Nice costume," the Uchiha snapped.

"Yeah, you too, Rudolph," he sniggered.

This was going to be a long night.

Sasuke crossed his arms. He was getting a little stuffy in his costume, and the stupid red dot on the tip of his nose was getting irritating. "Dobe, why'd I end up with this costume?"

"'Cos, you're not chipper enough to be a good Frosty." He tipped his hat to a few laughing girls. His fangirl ratings were definatly going up because of this.

Sasuke groaned inwardly. His ratings were going to go down. Fast. Unless... Some of them liked the kink? He shook the thought from his head. The only thing he could think of was a stupid girl like Ino or Sakura sneaking into his home and stealing another pair of his undergarments. He was running a bit low on the silken material.

He followed Naruto around the party all night long, taking tall glasses of whatever bubbly drink was in them. Before long, he was giggling and snapping his wrist at women and men alike, telling them of his 'best experience' in bed. Not that they'd asked...

Somewhere between the first glass of whatever had bubbles in it and the sixteenth, Naruto let go of the leash and disappeared into the crowd again. Then again, he figured he let him go on about whatever he was going on about to people who would put it in the newspaper sooner or later.

A few hours later, a dressed-as-Frosty blond stood over a sleepy looking Rudolph. "Let's go home, teme."

Naruto hooked Sasuke's arm around his neck and held tight to his side and arm to keep him balanced. "Hey, Sasuke?"

"Hn?"

"You do realize that was just apple cider, right?"

00000

Can anyone say crack? Anyway, not quite the effect I was going for, but you got a tiny splash of romance. The crack ending was for Barbie. -sigh- I luff her. So, to cure my angst over some stupid boy, I wrote this. And, the funny thing is, I was planning on making Shikamaru dressed as the reindeer, but everyone expects that. D So, here's Sasuke as Rudolph and Naruto as Frosty!! I tossed in the other pairings, evident or not, because I felt like it.

-shakes- I'm going through ShikaHina withdrawls... Ah, well.

By the way, did anyone notice that Sasuke has silk panties in this one? And, that he knew which bag hit him in the face?

Don't forget to review!