2 – Paging Dr. Alexander

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Skipper and Kowalski pushed open the door of the reptile house. Rico had followed them for some time, but couldn't keep up with his sliding teammates, not with the mother duck on his back. The captain and his lieutenant headed directly towards the water monitor exhibit.

The large glass pane enclosing the wanted reptile's habitat was all that stood between them and the owner of the terrarium; it was designed to mimic the African rainforest, with some small shrubs, a leaf covered floor and a small murky pool. Underneath a heating lamp, lying completely still was the water monitor. He had his back turned towards the glass so he couldn't see the penguin duo arrive.

Kowalski quickly began punching in the numeric code to open the enclosure. The beeps he produced reached the tympanic membrane of the water monitor. Skipper knew he was aware of their presence when his head jerked up. However, what he did next surprised both him and Kowalski.

Alexander jumped up and pressed himself against the wall, with his front claws on the back of his head. Skipper raised an eyebrow at his behavior while Kowalski finished with the code. The glass dropped and the bird duo could enter.

Skipper slowly waddled towards the water monitor and extended his flipper. "I swear I only thought about escaping for a second, two at the most. I won't do it again, please, I won't, I promise," spoke Alexander, panic radiating from his voice.

The lead bird threw his lieutenant a quizzical look. Kowalski pulled his clipboard from behind his back, "Posttraumatic shock, perhaps?"

Skipper turned back to the reptile he slowly placed a flipper on his shoulder, an action which made him flinch. "Calm down, soldier, turn around so we can see your face," he ordered.

Alexander did it slowly. He began shaking more fiercely as more of his underbelly was facing the penguins. He kept his claws behind his head and gulped, fearing what might happen.

The captain looked him over; he looked the same, but when he reached the lizard's eyes, he could see fear in them, "What happened to you?"

The medic took a few deep breaths, trying to calm down and slowly spoke, "What happened to me? Nothing, I'm what happened to everyone else," his claws slowly moved forward to clutch his head. "The echo of their screams just won't go away. It keeps bouncing inside my head. I haven't slept in weeks because I just keep on having reruns of what I… what I…" He grabbed his mouth and turned around.

Both the penguins cringed as they watched him empty his stomach on the ground. He started wobbling around so they rushed to his side and gave him some support, "Hey… HEY! Pull yourself together. Don't go passing out on us, you're needed."

He pulled himself out of the hold and stumbled to a wall. He pressed his back against it taking a defensive pose. "NO, I won't, never, I can't," he yelled. "Stay back, please, you aren't safe with me," he added and lifted one of his front legs.

Skipper squinted, to take a better look at the appendage, "What have you been doing to yourself?"

"I filed down my claws, they only hurt others."

Kowalski stepped forward, "Alexander, please calm down. We require your medical skills. You see, mother duck has fallen ill and she needs immediate medical attention."

The water monitor looked down at his front legs, "I can't, these hands, they can't save lives, they can only take them."

Skipper was sick and tired of it all; he stepped forward and gave the lizard a hard slap across the face. It sent him to the ground, holding his cheek, "Enough fooling around, if you don't save momma duck, we'll be looking at four orphans on our flippers. Do you really want to be the one tellin' them that mom's never coming back?"

The moment those words reached the reptile, he felt like time had stopped. The weight of all his actions, up until now, seemed to have been lifted of his shoulders for just a second, but it was enough for his brain to decide what his next actions would be.

He picked himself up, holding his sore cheek, and looked at Skipper. He struggled trying to hide the fear in his eyes and voice, "I'll do my best."

The door of the reptile house swung open and Rico, carrying the mother duck, waddled in. Kowalski rushed to his side and took the female bird off his back. That done, the Mohawk-wielding bird collapsed and desperately tried to regain his breath.

Alexander pushed in a portion of the wall in his habitat and revealed the staircase to the lower level. Skipper followed him down, while Kowalski did his best to catch up.

The water monitor flipped a switch and illuminated the rooms. As he walked down the short hallway, he left visible prints on the dust covered floor.

"It wouldn't kill you if you'd clean up from time to time," remarked Skipper.

"I know, but… I haven't been down here ever since that day… I didn't feel like it deserved this place… I just wanted to finish my sentence," Alexander replied, when he reached the infirmary.

Most of the equipment inside was covered with white blankets, which the medic pulled off. He gently brushed his rough scales against the cold steel of the medical table. Skipper watched him from the entrance with his flippers crossed over his chest.

Kowalski's panting could soon be heard coming ever closer, "Next time… you don't make… the brains… do… the muscle's… work…" he said between pants.

The lead penguin took the duck off his back and carried her over to the table, where he laid her down. He watched Alexander as he hesitantly approached her. He was shaking all over and he probably would've sweated as well, had he the pores to do so. "What's the matter, you look like it's your first day on the job. Pull yourself together and get on with it already," he ordered.

The lizard swallowed a lump in his throat before speaking, "H-hello, how a-are we today? I mean, my n-name is Doctor Alexander and I'll b-be your… doctor. Um, what's your n-name?"

Skipper slapped his forehead watching the scenario unfold.

The female bird slowly turned towards him, "Ma-Marilynn" she answered.

"Well… that's a lovely name. Now Marilynn, c-could you p-please tell me what's wrong?"

"My stomach, it hurts."

He looked at her abdomen, "Um, could you tell me exactly where. I would touch you myself, but I don't want to cause you any more suffering." The female duck responded by placing her wing over an area on her abdomen. "Aha, I see… well I don't see anything so it's probably something on the inside."

Now it was Kowalski's turn to slap his forehead. "I'm certain that Hippocrates has just turned over in his grave."

"What to do? What to do?" the lizard asked himself while scratching his head. "I have to take a look inside of you… but I don't want to expose you to any x-rays… uh did you eat anything funny?" he tried.

"Give me something for the pain already!" she yelled. In his surprise, Alexander jumped back.

"Right, pain," he ran over to a cupboard stacked with morphine ampoules and grabbed a bottle of valium. "Here, take this," he gave the mother a pill, which she quickly swallowed. A few seconds later, her eyes fluttered shut and she fell asleep. "On second thought, I should have given you something that doesn't cause drowsiness."

"Alexander, can I have a word with you?" asked Skipper.

"Uh, probably," He managed to answer before being spun around and caught in a full nelson by the lead penguin.

"KOWALSKI, NOW!"

The scientist pulled a squirt gun from behind his back. He doused the water monitor in a stream of yellowish liquid. Once the container was empty, Skipper let go, "Okay, you're clear."

Alexander wiped his eyes, "What was that?"

"It's just a concoction I came up with. It's a mixture of different esters, some tartar sauce and butter. It reveals Danes, space squids and lobsters, hiding in our midst."

"…I don't get why it reveals Danes," replied the reptile.

"Swedish candy is known to be less sweet and more fruity. Esters are what give fruit its aroma. And Sweden is an enemy of Denmark," explained Kowalski.

"Exactly, and like they say, the enemy of my enemy is just an enemy I can be friendly with until he turns against us," added the captain.

"Oh, okay."

There was a short silence, which Kowalski broke, "What are your current speculations on what is causing Marilynn's symptoms?"

The monitor turned around and looked at the sleeping duck, "She seems a little overweight."

Skipper face palmed while Alexander stepped closer to her. He felt the duck's abdomen, "I didn't want to say it to her before because I didn't want to hurt her feelings. Kowalski, come over here and feel this."

The scientist did as told, "Odd, I wouldn't think of mother duck as someone who would work on their abdominal muscles."

"That's because she doesn't. Marilynn has an evil thing called egg binding," the medic's head dropped, "It's always the good animals that get sick… It's just not fair. *Sigh* I'll give her a calcium sho- no… I'll start her on a calcium rich diet as soon as she gets up." He then placed his claw on one of her wings, "Don't worry girl, you'll pull through," he whispered.

Skipper exchanged glances with his lieutenant who just shrugged. "Well, it's nice to hear some good news. So, now that you have your… whatever back, or not, are you ready to start training again?"

Alexander looked at the lead penguin with fear in his eyes once again, "No, I can't, one life doesn't make up for all those I took. I'll stay here, at least this way I can't hurt anyone."

"You can't make up for wrongs by lying around underneath a heating lamp. You'll have to get out there and work for it."

"B-but… I don't even know where to start."

Kowalski began listing through some notes, "Stray cats have taken care of the pigeon genocide victims and the new rats have cleaned up after the old ones. My suggestion, therefore, is-"

Skipper cut him off, "Now I'm not exactly an expert when it comes to romance, but I'm pretty sure it would be best to start with a special somebody that's been crying her soul out for the last 3 weeks."

"Thank you, sir," he saluted and then ran out of the infirmary.

I got the inspiration for Mother Duck's name from Princess Bubblegum11's review, thank you.
Also, "Egg binding" is an actual disease caused by calcium deficiency.
So yeah, could I make him any more OOC? Just wait to find out.
Hope you liked it so far and review.