Parallel Chapter 1: Waking to a Fantasy

Parallel World

A/N: This chapter has been redone-not entirely, but I have edited it to make things significantly less sappy...and make much more sense in the wider context of the story. Hope you approve~

Thank you all so much for your wonderful reviews! You all are fantastic and I hope you continue to enjoy the story! Here we have a longer chapter, set in the parallel world with Canon Snape! Takes place during the same time the last chapter did.

Warning: There are some T+ sections/mild-M (that is, light sexual references) in the beginning segment of this chapter. Read at your own risk!

Please let me know how I'm doing!

I do not own Harry Potter.

Please R&R~!

o O o O o

Professor Severus Snape scowled as he felt himself returning to the waking world. He had been wrenched from a particularly wonderful dream which, of course, when faced with the cruel reality of his life, would feel more like a horrific nightmare than anything. No doubt today would be full of none of the sweet kisses and gentle touches of his dream world, but rather with the whining complaints of many a brat, er, student.

He would, knowing his luck, be called into Albus' office where he would be forced to drink sickeningly sugared tea and eat those detestable lemon drops, and then get guilt-tripped into babysitting that damned bloody Boy-Who-Lived. He would no doubt be forced to hear, once again, that as Black's death was still weighing heavily on the precious little Savior-brat, he should be gentle on the boy.

Yeah, right. The last thing a brat like Potter needs is more damn coddling. Be gentle on him, my arse! Black was a nuisance. His influence is nothing to mourn. Not that I should expect Potter to see that but he is better off without him!

With another grumble, Snape rolled over and let his arms stretch out. A rare smile ghosted on his lips as the scent which had enveloped him throughout his dreams embraced him once again. A soft touch, so incredibly soft to be almost impossible, stroked his cheek. Snape realized he must still be dreaming. And then, he felt a sensation more vivid and heartbreakingly perfect than anything in his wildest dreams as his lips were lost entirely in the softest, most earnest, most fitting kiss he had ever experienced. The taste was beyond words. This sweet phantom continued to kiss him and he found himself responding. Then, the ghostly touches on his face returned, and then moved, and he felt soft, gentle, practiced fingers running lovingly through his hair.

Severus, eyes still closed, let his hands move forward. He found the softest cheeks imaginable, and then lovely, soft, long hair. He stroked it, and then buried his face in the locks as he let his hands move down the lithe body which moved ever closer to his. She, it, whatever this being was, fit with him so perfectly. This had to be a dream sent from Merlin above to torment him. For never had he felt sensations like this, love like this. For absurdly, that's what it felt like. And besides, this was just a dream, so he had no reason to mince words or feelings. He was in love with this projection of his desires and wants.

And he knew exactly who he would proclaim this dream-love to be. "Lily," he murmured.

To his surprise, he found himself being kissed again, even more fervently, as he said the name. He could hardly stop himself from smirking. Of course this most vivid of dream sensations would come in the form of the one woman he had ever truly cared for.

"Morning, Sev," a soft, heartbreakingly sweet voice whispered against his neck. The warmth and vibration of the voice against his throat sent shivers through him.

He gripped this wonderful dream-Lily more tightly to him, and assaulted her once more with kisses. Phantom-Lily laughed, an astonishing, soul-lifting sound, and Snape found himself weakening. That was it. He was never waking up.

"Open your eyes, Sev! You don't have to act as if this is your only chance to hold me, silly!"

"Oh, but it is," Severus mumbled. "I don't want this dream to end, Lily. You're not real, you see. That's why I can't open my eyes."

"Oh really, Sev? If I weren't real could I do this?" Her mischievous, laughing voice sent shivers down his spine, and then he gasped as very warm and very real-feeling hands moved lower and explored his body thoroughly. In his surprise, Severus opened his eyes, and there, dancing before him in high humor and affection and undeniable desire, was the object of his dreams.

For a time, Severus could only stare at Lily, lying there beside him in all her incredible, full-bodied, unclothed, wild-haired, green-eyed beauty. He knew her to be dead, and yet here she was. His eyes had to be playing a trick on him, and yet all his senses were screaming at him to believe what he saw. Lily, his Lily, the girl (now woman) of his dreams, was lying beside him in bed, and was now staring at him in slight concern, stroking his cheek with one hand, and calling his name.

"Sev? What's wrong, Sev? What's on your mind?"

Severus blinked. He didn't want this dream to end, but what if this were nothing more than a cruel joke? For it couldn't be real. He knew that to be true. There was nothing he could do about it. Lily was dead, and the sooner he stopped living in denial, the better.

But he thought he had. For years he had lived on, attempting to accept that she was never coming back, but his life had never gotten any better. In fact, only in this moment, and in those few minutes kissing her, and being in bed with her, whether dream or reality, did he feel himself in the throws of a life he actually wanted to live.

But the more wonderful the dream, the more awful the reality, and so he flung himself backwards out of bed, summoned his wand, and in mere seconds had it poised at the neck of the person who just had to be an imposter.

The woman's expression turned from concern and affection to a mixture of anger, shock and hurt in split seconds. Severus noticed that there was very little fear. Whoever this imposter was didn't seem to think he would or could hurt her for one reason or another…

"Who are you?" He growled. "How dare you? What kind of sick joke do you think this is?"

She blinked, watching him in obvious confusion. As she watched him, and the seconds flew by, and as his distrustful eyes never wavered, he noticed the hurt which seemed so faint at first was beginning to cloud over her eyes, yet she was still holding his gaze with equal parts concern and affection as well.

"What are you saying, Sev?" She asked quietly. "No joke. Just me. Just your wife, Lily." She smiled warmly at him, as if letting him know she didn't hold his antics against him. For Severus though, he wanted so much to believe her, those words she said, those impossible words out of his wildest fantasies, and yet he knew them to not be true, and so fear and anger overtook him.

"Don't!" He screamed, and she did flinch then at his tone, but she never let her gaze waver from his.

"Don't you dare…how dare you? Who are you? What is this? Polyjuice potion? But no…that's impossible." Because as he gazed at her, he realized. Even if someone had managed to grab a hair of hers 15 years ago, they would look just as she did all that time ago, and yet the woman in front of him was very definitely Lily, but clearly a Lily in her mid to late thirties. 37, just like he, he mused. But nevertheless, she was even more beautiful than he remembered, even more stunning than she had been at 20.

"Some Glamourie, then" he said weakly, but the look in her green eyes, so sincere, so honest, so affectionate, was undoing him on the spot, and he found himself crumpling against the wall as she crept towards him, apparently unconcerned that he still had his wand brandished in her direction.

She merely followed him, still completely naked, and knelt before him, gazing earnestly up at him. "What's wrong, Sev? Tell me, why don't you believe it's me? Here, ask me anything, I'll prove it! Oh, sod it all, I don't feel like wasting time, I'll just grab some Veritaserum…we have some in the store closet. One sec!"

And Severus simply watched her helplessly as she skipped away like a forest nymph. He vaguely noticed how cold he was, and looking down, registered that he, too, was entirely unclothed on the floor of his bedchamber. Then, the beautiful red-haired woman returned, and uncorked a vial of clear liquid. She smiled at Severus.

"See? Why don't you give it to me. Make sure you know it's genuine."

Not moving his gaze from her, he sniffed and tested the potion. Satisfied, he let three drops of the powerful truth potion land on her tongue, and she sat down, cross-legged before him. He could barely stand to look at her, breasts full and beautiful on her well-proportioned, ivory-skinned body, and yet he could not look away from her. He was absolutely struck dumb with awe and confusion. Suddenly, he realized he hardly cared if she were real or not. She was his to look at at the moment, and that was good enough. Or nearly, at least, for he could think of a number of things he would rather do than simply look…

Her eyes took on a dull, glazed look due to the Veritaserum, and it took Severus a moment to remember that he needed to ask her questions. And why again was he questioning this beautiful creature? Ah yes! To determine whether this woman was his beloved, magically brought back from the dead, or a cruel imposter, sent to deliver him to his death with a broken heart, or simply a figment of his lonely, diseased mind.

Clearing his throat, he choked out, "Who are you?"

"Lily Evans Snape," she responded unhesitatingly.

And that first answer rendered him speechless for so long he feared the potion may have already worn off.

"How-how is that possible? You died! 15 years ago, the Dark Lord, he-"

"I did not die," she said tonelessly. "James Potter was killed 15 years ago. Harry and I were saved by Severus Snape and brought to Hogwarts. Two years later, Severus and I married, and we have been living at Spinner's End, raising Harry together ever since."

"That's absurd. That's not how it happened at all!" But she didn't respond. Then he registered another part of what she had said that he found incredibly odd. "R-raise Potter? What? That's insane, I-"

Again, she didn't respond, and it hit him that to one under Veritaserum, his words would make very little sense. Then a horrible thought occurred to him. If he had raised the brat, and if he were married to her…would the brat be…his? No, Merlin's Beard! No way in seven hells!

Snape tried to take deep calming breaths, attempting to convince himself he didn't care, but it nevertheless bugged him, and he couldn't help but ask…

"I bet the brat, er, Po-Harry, wasn't pleased to be raised by a Snape," he sneered.

Lily blinked, and it seemed as if her consciousness under the potion were trying to laugh, but her face remained expressionless and she responded, still tonelessly, "Harry loves his father, Severus Snape. He is very pleased to be his son. He, after all, is a Snape as well, as Sev adopted him soon after our marriage."

And once again, Snape found himself lost for words. This was insane. This could not be Veritaserum…maybe it was essence of insanity? Or, some potion designed to make the one who takes it spew only the innermost dreams of the one administering it? Well, no. No bloody way would I want that brat to be my own…of course, there is something to say for me taking him away from that arrogant sod James Potter…but that's not the point! I don't want Potter, I don't want anything to do with him! What did this alternate me think he was doing?

Suddenly, Severus stopped, as he realized in his ramblings he may have just figured out what the hell was going on.

"I'm in a different universe," he whispered. He knew it had to be true. After all, unless he were completely delusional, and suffering from some extremely powerful memory charm, he knew the reality he remembered to be real, and despite his grumblings to the opposite, he knew this woman-Lily!-had truly taken Veritaserum. So they both remembered completely different events, both sets of events which seemed to be true. Parallel Universes was the only explanation that seemed to make sense. After all, he had heard of such a thing before, though it wasn't something to be found in most library collections.

"A different universe?" Lily, woken from her truth potion-induced state, asked suspiciously.

Severus flinched, and then gaped, for he suddenly found himself face to face with the truth. This woman, this beautiful being, this beautiful, utterly naked and perfect person before him, nearly on his lap, was truly Lily Evans. And even better, Lily Evans Snape! She was his wife, albeit in another universe, but nevertheless! Even the thought that she was destined to be his in another lifetime filled him with a degree of hope and joy and giddiness he could scarcely remember feeling before. He could barely suppress the smile that graced his lips, though it did, admittedly, more resemble a smirk, the necessary muscles being so out of practice.

"Sev? Earth to Sev! Should I call Poppy down here? Of course, you're going to have to put some clothes on. I don't want anyone else, not even our dear friend Poppy, to get a glimpse of what is so. Entirely. Mine," she finished, grinning evilly and giving him little kisses along his collarbone.

Severus suddenly couldn't hold on another instant, and grabbing her around the shoulders, pulled her into him and crushed her in a desperate, possessive embrace. He just held onto her, for how long he wasn't sure, unable to believe what was happening. He knew he was rambling, a few tears may even have escaped. He couldn't care less at the moment. All he could vaguely remember, beside the feel of her warm, soft body against his, was his saying over and over again, like a chant or a prayer, "Oh, Lily."

At Severus' actions, Lily stiffened in surprise and concern, but she could feel he wasn't in the state to answer questions and so hugged him back tightly, burying her face in his strong chest and the crook of his neck. As he held her even more tightly, she found her heart fluttering, and she oddly had the sensation that she was a young woman again in the early days of her relationship with Sev when every hug or kiss or clasped hand made her jittery and mad. Whatever was wrong with Severus, her heart went out to him, and she found herself crying against him, though she wasn't sure why.

Eventually, however, she leaned back ever so slightly, gently ran a hand through his hair and cupped his face, staying in his lap yet moving so she could see his face clearly. Her eyes narrowed in concern and she spoke softly. "Sev, love. What's wrong? You've been funny all morning. Please tell me what's wrong!"

He regarded her in silence for a time before saying, hoarsely, "I…can't."

"What do you mean?"

Severus pursed his lips. If she found out that he was, actually, not her husband, but in fact another Severus entirely, she wouldn't allow him to hold her this way, would she? No, certainly not. Lily, wild and fierce as she could so often be, was underneath it all a very good, and very moral girl. But how could one cheat on oneself? Certainly that didn't count?

As was so often the case with Lily, her worry soon gave way to irritation, and her fiery personality shone through as she suddenly burst out in frustration "Sev, I swear! If you don't own up, I'll make you take that damn truth potion yourself! What was up earlier? Why were you so sure I wasn't who I said I was? What's happened? Please tell me!"

Her concern was so sincere, and so raw, that before he knew what was happening, his long-guarded emotional walls began to drop all around him, and he found himself talking to her, telling her what he'd just figured out and then more. For so long he had survived on secrecy. To dissemble and only reveal half-truths had long ago become natural for him. But now, with Lily here before him, he felt the weight of those secrets more keenly than he had ever before. And faced with those dazzling emerald eyes which had continued to haunt him, he found himself helpless to guard them any longer.

And so, for a long while, he simply spoke, running one hand absentmindedly through her hair. He told her about himself, about his life. He told her how much he had missed her. How much he had always loved her…he found himself admitting it all.

It seemed hours had passed by the time he stopped talking, and they had found their way back into bed at some point, Lily wrapped around Severus, his arms tight around her back as they spoke quietly, intently. Lily felt her heart breaking almost constantly for this darker, sadder, lonelier version of the man she loved with all her heart. Despite how impossible it all seemed, she couldn't help but trust what he told her.

Though for the most part, she felt only sympathy and understanding for him and the life he had lived, she had a bad feeling about the way he had glossed over his relationship with Harry, when asked. She could almost feel, without being told so directly, that he was less than civil to the boy. She felt herself beginning to rile with anger at the thought of her long-time best friend treating her innocent son with irrational vitriol, but hesitated as she looked at him and saw the deep, penetrating pain and sorrow she was so unused to seeing in Severus' eyes.

And it began to occur to her just how much the man had truly suffered.

Though she didn't like it, nor did she have to condone or accept it, she could understand why, having suffered as much as this Severus obviously had, he would be bitter and less than happy to see a boy he likely felt both a sense of ownership over for being hers, and a fierce resentment for what he must represent to him. As she thought about it, she knew that, as sad as it was, having to see Harry would have only made Severus' pain worse. She could imagine Severus seeing the boy's glasses and dark mop of hair as a slap in the face, as if to say 'I'll never be yours. I'm James Potter's son, and only his.'

Lily had the feeling this more closed-off Sev would never have allowed himself to come to such a conclusion about Harry, but she knew him. Even having just met this particular version of him, she knew how Severus was. And really, it made sense, based on what she knew of him, that he would see Harry that way…as a reminder of what could have been, but could never be. Of what could have been, but wasn't.

Sev, with all his irrational self-hatred, probably saw himself in Harry, probably saw the embodiment of his mistakes, mixed with the face of his high school tormentor and the eyes of his love, in this one innocent boy. Considering that, was it any wonder if he treated the boy like rot?

No, it wasn't. But it still made her both furious and incredibly, incredibly sad to think that her two stubborn boys might be alone in the same universe, and yet never able to reach each other, due simply to something so petty. She wondered if she might be able to do something about it.

Her thoughts swirled as she leaned into his embrace. She could not help but care genuinely for this version of Sev. For that was what he was-her husband, if his life had not gone as he had hoped. This man was her husband, too, and she was his, just as she was her Sev's. This Sev had had the potential to be her husband, if things hadn't gone the way they had for him. The question was, was it too late for his life to turn around? Clearly, he still cared for her, but he could never be her husband. Not exactly, anyway.

And what about Harry? Was there any hope for a reconciliation with the boy in his world? She knew how much her husband adored their son. He would give absolutely anything for Harry's happiness. So this man, too, could have felt that way about the Harry he knew. But perhaps too much time had passed. Perhaps he wouldn't be able to get over his pain, to see Harry as a person rather than a symbol of his own pain and regret.

Could she help him change his perspective? She really hoped so. She vehemently hoped she could. With this silent pact made, she leaned forward and gave him a chaste, bittersweet kiss. She held it for several seconds before pulling back, hoping she had conveyed her intentions and care.

Despite the innocent nature of the kiss, Severus looked shocked. "But, Lily…" he started, hoarsely, "I'm…I told you. I'm not him…and after all I've done-"

She shook her head, smiling sadly, "I know that, Sev. I know you aren't him. You can only be who you are, but even so, I can't help but care for you. You will always be my beloved Severus. Only, you have lived another series of events which I will never have the chance to experience. Never doubt it, though, that I love you, Sev. Every possible version of you. Do you understand me? So don't run away. Stay with me until we figure out what has happened to land you here. You will, won't you? You don't mind being around me, do you?"

Severus could only stare at her in shock and awe. "Lily…I…" He swallowed thickly, and had to struggle to fight back an embarrassing stinging sensation in the backs of his eyes. "Of course, but...I'm, I'm tainted. I've done horrible things. I'm not a nice man, Lily. It sounds like the Severus Snape you know is…quite a different person. I just…you don't know me, really. You don't know what you're saying, Lily!"

But her gaze never wavered. She stared at him, clutching his forearms with her hands and said, very firmly, "Then let me get to know you. Let me understand you! I want to, Sev! I know you've been through utter hell, but why don't you let someone help you for a change? You shouldn't always have to be the savior! Let someone else save you for once." She smiled, and her eyes were almost pleading, and when he softened a fraction, she hugged him fiercely.

And when he next spoke again, he found, to his surprise, and horror, that he couldn't help but mention the last person he wanted to invade the privacy of his thoughts and this room at the second, but her green eyes were suddenly reminding him too much of him to stop himself. "A saving-people thing, Lily? I'm afraid that honor goes to your golden boy son, not to me."

"Well, then, something else you two have in common, Sev," she said smugly, and Severus frowned darkly.

Suddenly, she stretched and yawned. "Well, Sev, I don't know about you, but after such an emotional tug-of-war, I'm starving! Let's bathe and get some lunch, okay?"

Severus nodded weakly. He could hardly believe what he was seeing. Here he was, in this world where his fantasies were a reality, where he could touch, and hold, and talk to the woman who had haunted his dreams and fantasies practically all his nights since puberty.

He wasn't sure what would happen next in this fantastical, astonishing world, and yet he found himself strangely compelled to simply live and let happen, a philosophy very unlike his usual.

But he couldn't help but agree that may be the way to go as Lily smiled and waved to him before entering the bathroom, her green eyes sparkling and so very alive.

Yes, he could definitely get used to such a life…

o O o O o

In his tenure as the dreaded Potions Master and Head of Slytherin, Severus had managed to accrue quite a reputation, and along with that, he was used to being given a certain degree of respect. That is, he was used to the masses cowering under his intimidating presence and nasty glares.

It seemed, however, that his counterpart had no such reputation.

As he walked through the school hallways, he was first greeted overly-cheerfully by Pomona Sprout. Well, that was not too surprising. She and Lily seemed to be on good terms, after all, and so Severus responded with a civil nod.

Speaking of which…Lily! Severus couldn't take his eyes off of her. A large part of himself was half-expecting her to vanish the instant he stopped watching, but every time she caught him staring at her so 'indefatigably' as she worded it, she would laugh and lightly brush his hand with hers. Simply the sound of her laughter, so pure and good and uplifting was enough to finish him. Severus had hardly ever felt so vulnerable as he did now, but he was vulnerable in a kind of dreamlike ecstasy. Just the thought that Lily was here beside him, that she had forgiven him for his horrible mistake that day in their fifth year…that somehow, if given the chance they would have worked-to Severus, it made all the difference. Life was different, better, with Lily in it.

Only having been beside her for several hours, and he found himself wondering how he had survived for so long without her.

But that was just it. He had survived. That is to say nothing of living.

So wrapped up in this torrent of unpracticed and rusty emotions, he found himself following Lily blindly as they headed for Albus' office.

It was then that he got another dose of something entirely too ludicrous. Draco Malfoy and Ron Weasley were walking side by side down the hallway, and were not hexing each other. They were actually talking quite civilly and even…laughing.

Severus couldn't stop himself from stopping dead-still in the corridor and gaping at them before regaining his composure a moment later. He had managed to rip his gaze from them at Lily's soft call of "Sev?" when he heard the red-headed brat himself call out, in a tone which did not exude fear of certain death, "Hey Professor Snape! How's it going?"

Severus turned and gaped in a very uncharacteristic manner at the boy grinning winningly at him. Severus could not fathom how to respond to such an unexpected greeting, but then Draco stepped in, grinning even more widely, and, once again stunning Severus, slung an arm around Weasley and then, leaning in conspiratorially, whispered "Uncle Sev! Ron and I wanted to talk to you about Harry's surprise birthday party. Could we stop by in a bit?" Then, turning to Lily, he added, "Hi, Professor Evans-Snape!"

Severus couldn't manage anything more than a strangled noise before Lily grabbed his arm and tugged him none-too-lightly behind her, saying, "Boys? How about if we talk about this later, okay? Professor Snape and I are late for a meeting with the headmaster."

"Oh, okay," Draco consented reluctantly, pouting. "Fine. We're late to meet Ginny and Harry on the Pitch, anyway. See you later!"

"What's up, Sev?" Lily asked quietly as she pulled his attention away from the two energetic boys. "I suppose something about that interaction was not what you're used to?"

"You could say that," Severus muttered weakly, rubbing at his temples. "Suffice it to say Draco is less than friendly with the Gryffindors in…where I come from."

"To be fair, he isn't buddy-buddy with all of them, but being your Godson, he and Harry grew up together. They're practically as close as brothers, and so he makes an exception for Harry and his close friends," she explained quietly.

Severus shook his head, not thrilled with this new information. In all honesty, he could care less about adolescent friendships and power-struggles, particularly concerning Harry bloody Potter…but for Lily's sake, he knew he would have to swallow his feelings in that regard, and so he simply made an unenthusiastic grunt of understanding.

Lily watched him silently, lips pursed slightly as they reached the end of the hallway and called out the password (Cauldron Cakes) to Albus' office. This alternate Severus, though he was much sadder and angrier than her husband, had been so open when they were alone together, but the instant they stepped into public, he had seemed to shut down almost entirely. She realized, sadly, that being around him would perhaps be more complicated than she had thought. After all, it wasn't simply as if this were the Sev she knew just out of school. This man before her had his own life experiences, and who he was now was who he had had to become to survive. She was only now beginning to understand what that meant.

Just how high were the walls around Severus' heart? And could she break them down alone?

Severus let Lily do most of the talking when they got to Dumbledore's office, only adding details in occasionally when they were pertinent, and speaking mostly only when directly addressed. He sighed. He knew he was perhaps behaving much too like a sullen child to be unobjectionable, but he found it almost painful to sit here, talking to the old coot, when he could be spending each second wasted here in Lily's embrace.

To him, she was the only thing that mattered, and her presence in this universe was the only thing he had any interest in.

Severus nearly followed her when she got up to go to the loo in the middle of their meeting, but he caught himself. As it turned out, however, he ended up wishing he had accompanied her, for she had only just left when there was a knock on the door and Albus paled slightly.

"Hm. Not the best timing," he muttered, and then sent a pleading glance to Severus before calling "Come on in, dear boy!" to the door.

Albus' odd facial gestures took on whole new meaning when a short young man with blazing green eyes and a moppy mess of hair tumbled through the door.

Severus quickly schooled his shock into a scowl, but he could not hide his surprise when the boy caught his eye and absolutely beamed.

"Hey, Dad!" Harry called, racing over to stand beside him, either missing or ignoring the man's violent flinch. When Severus didn't respond, Harry looked over his shoulder to say, quickly, "Oh, sorry Professor Dumbledore. I shouldn't have just barged in like this, but Draco and Ron said my parents were talking to you and I needed to speak with them."

"It's quite alright, my boy. We actually have something important we need to discuss with you, Harry. But you arrived a little prematurely, I'm afraid. If you could, I need to speak a little further with you fa-er, Severus," he quickly amended at Severus' glare, "in private beforehand. Could you make your way to the adjoining room?" He indicated a set of mahogany double doors with a flamboyant wave of his arm.

"Oh, sure sir." Harry smiled softly before cocking his head at Severus in concern. "Um, dad? Are you okay? You look a little peaky."

Harry had seen his father angry on many occasions, but it shocked him how quickly he rose to ire at this innocuous comment. The man stood suddenly, looming over him and shooting him a glare that would have terrified most. Harry, however, was far too used to his father's expressions to cower before it. He simply frowned up at him, meeting his eyes defiantly. But what he saw in those familiar dark eyes made him freeze.

He had never seen his father look at him that way. Nowhere in the man's glare could he see a hint of amusement, affection or even disappointment. If he were honest with himself, the feeling the expression most gave him was…well, dislike. Maybe even stronger than that. It gave him the chills. He continued to stare into the man's gaze, waiting for him to break, but if anything, his expression just grew harder, and additional annoyance was layered onto it. Finally, Harry did break the gaze. He just couldn't stand to see his father look at him that way for another instant. It made him feel strangely vulnerable and unsure of himself, almost like an outsider in his own skin to have his own father look at him with…loathing.

"Severus!" Albus tried, but the man was shaking from suppressed emotion, his fists clenching painfully. He honestly was surprised by the violence of his own reaction, and by how difficult it was to stop himself lashing out at the boy. He knew that Lily had told him that in this world, he had apparently adopted the brat, but it was all in abstraction, and in the context of Lily's sweet presence, everything had seemed surreal and harmless. But now, suddenly faced with the brat himself, looking just as much a James Potter clone as ever, grinning cheekily and calling him 'Dad,' something within him just broke. He wasn't sure what he felt. His insides were squirming in an unfamiliar way and so he covered his confusion the way he felt most comfortable; with pure, black hate.

But even in the midst of this angry haze of confusion, Severus felt a slight twinge of guilt when the boy finally broke the insolent staring contest and hunched over despondently. Did the brat really care that much for his approval? But of course, he didn't really care for anything to do with him at all. It was his counterpart who had a relationship with this boy.

"I'm sorry, Dad. I'm not sure what I-"

There it was again. That word. That damn word that made his insides squirm traitorously, despite his knowledge that it meant nothing in relation to him. He couldn't stand it. The boy couldn't be in his presence another instant.

"Don't. Call. Me. That." He bit out, his voice laced with loathing, before he could stop himself.

The boy flinched, and his gaze snapped up. The hurt and confusion were so raw in those eyes that Severus was suddenly, and painfully, reminded of another pair of green eyes. He needed the boy to leave. He could not risk his presence any longer. "Get out," he hissed. "Leave us to talk." And with that, he looked away. He could feel that the boy was still there, however, and knew that this strategy wasn't working. Of course, he could be truly cruel to the boy and he might leave him be, but he couldn't do that when he knew it would hurt Lily, and so he swallowed his pride and bit out a quick, "Look, I...cannot talk now. Please listen to the headmaster. There are…things you must understand, but you can't be in here right now. Just go."

"Oh. Okay, dad. I'll just be in the next room, then," Harry said softly, his eyes wide in worry. The hurt in his green eyes was still clear, but it wasn't as obvious as it was previously.

Severus continued to stare at his hands until the door shut behind the boy. He looked up reluctantly at the headmaster who was watching him intently, searchingly. The look of disapproval that had etched its way onto Albus' face during that more-than-awkward encounter had softened significantly, and he motioned for Severus to once again take a seat.

Severus broke his gaze. The look of consideration and partial approval was harder for him to deal with than harsh disapproval, honestly. For he knew he'd acted unfairly. The boy, little as he wanted to admit it, had done nothing to warrant the verbal attack and glares he had subjected him to. It was his mere presence, the simple concept of the boy that was troubling him. But he hadn't intended for them to have a confrontation like that before the boy was even told of his identity. It would have spared them both a good deal of grief. But now the blasted brat had to think he'd done something to make his father dislike him. Great. Pile another one on my list of sins.

But why did he even care? He didn't care about the brat. Sure, he'd vowed to protect him, but he had never actually come close to liking him. He had always taken pleasure at offending or verbally abusing the boy-who-lived. So why did he feel like such a bastard for treating this boy as he had? After all, the way he'd spoken to him was nowhere near the standard of venom with which he normally treated the brat's counterpart.

But he already knew the answer to that question. Once again, Lily. In his world, it was easy enough to forget Potter had anything to do with Lily, but here, it was painfully obvious. And furthermore, though he wouldn't admit it to himself, there was something about the way he'd called him that word, 'Dad,' meaningless as it was, and the way he'd looked at him with affection in those green eyes, that had chipped at something in him.

It was also the first time, if he were to admit it, that he had really been unguarded enough around the boy to see the striking similarities in how expressive his green eyes were as compared to his mother's. The way he had looked at him, upon first entering the room, had mirrored almost exactly the way Lily had been looking at him most of the morning. The fact that his practiced cold callousness had stripped that open expression from the boy, leaving his green eyes more dulled than before, struck him. He had never had that kind of power around Harry Potter, and yet this boy seemed so fragile in comparison, as if the slightest cruel word from him could snap him like a twig.

"Sorry for keeping you two," Lily's voice rang out, closing the door behind her. With her entrance, the temperature in the room seemed to increase by leaps and bounds. She seemed to notice this, despite Severus' feeble attempts at a smile, and she frowned. "Did something happen here?"

"I'm afraid, Lily," Albus started, "That young Harry is in dire need of some thorough explanations." He looked at Severus pointedly, and Lily gasped, her hand moving to cover her mouth.

"Oh Sev, you didn't! What…what happened?"

"Before you jump to conclusions, Lily, Severus did not say anything he should regret."

"Don't sugarcoat it, Albus. I was a right bastard to the boy. This is just…this is not going to work," he sighed, trailing off.

"Sev," Lily tried, kneeling down and taking his hands, cupping her palm on his cheek to move his gaze to meet hers, "Stop giving yourself such a hard time. I know that asking you to form a relationship with Harry is a lot to ask. Maybe it's too much to ask, but we can't know that yet...and anyway, I know it will take time. All I ask is that you try for me. We're going home in a few days and it'll be just the three of us the whole summer. You need to make an effort to get along with him. I'll talk to him and make sure he gives you some space, but I can't force you two. I need your cooperation, Severus."

Many thoughts ran through his head as he swallowed this new information. Of course. Summer. That was one issue he had not anticipated. To spend a summer with Lily at home was the stuff of dreams…but of course, they wouldn't be alone. And he couldn't kid himself that there would be any way to avoid Potter if they were staying at Spinner's End together. It just wasn't big enough. And he couldn't ask Lily to send the boy away. That would be selfish beyond words! Of course, the brat has gotten to spend every damn summer of his coddled life with her! Even as he thought it, jealously, a traitorous voice in the back of his head reminded him that the Potter he knew couldn't remember a thing about his own mother…

For the first time, Severus felt a twinge of pity for the boy. Not the boy here, but Potter in his world. To have Lily as a mother but to have no memory of her just seemed incredibly unfair.

Damn it, I knew it! Lily's turning me soft already…

Then he smiled wryly. I guess I shouldn't be so surprised that this world's Severus Snape isn't quite so intimidating. Living with Lily for so long is enough to melt anyone.

Thanks for reading! Please let me know what you think! I'm not sure how I dealt with the whole Lily-Sev interaction but...anyway, I hope to hear from you! Thanks~

Next Chapter: Back in the Canon world, Severus talk to Harry and confronts Albus about the Dursleys! Look forward to it!

tess4aria