Dear Diary,
I'm back! Percy got me unlocked from the bathroom yesterday and I only missed half of the campfire.

Yesterday at camp fire Jimmy and Token were claimed, so that makes five of us so far. I think Eric is still mad that Token's dad is Zeus, king of the gods. But you know what I say? Well, I think Token should give him heck! The most powerful gods and their children should be given some dang respect!

Also I feel bad for Kenny because he's worried he won't be claimed by his parent. I think mostly he's just hoping his mom isn't Aphrodite so that he can "stick it in her daughters." Now I don't really know what that means, do you, Diary?

Right now it's just after breakfast and the cabins are getting ready for capture the flag. Me an' my big brother Percy are on a team with the Hades cabin, Hermes cabin, Apollo's cabin, and Athena's cabin, and Zeus's cabin. Other than the Aphrodite kids who aren't playing, everyone else is on the other team. I'm a lil' nervous but Percy knows how to fight so I'm just gonna stick by him. I'll come back later to tell you how it goes! Goodbye for now, Diary.

Love Butters

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Hello again Diary!
We got absolutely pussy-pounded in capture the flag. My face still hurts from Eric pushing me into the dirt. But I used my powers of water control to get back at him by washing the dirt off immediately! Ha! That'll teach him a lesson.

An' right after capture the flag do you know what happened? Kyle's mom Athena claimed him as her son. Who didn't see that coming though, what with Kyle being a nerd an' all.

And you wouldn't believe it, but Kenny was just claimed by his dad, Apollo, five minutes ago! I thought for sure his parent was going to be Aphrodite, since he's so dirty an' all.

Anyway, even though I've only been here two days now everyone seems to love me for some reason. The Aphrodite girls really love me. Some of them told me they would give me a makeover later, and they could find me any girl I wanted. I don't know if I want a girl though. Girls just take up time and I'd rather live a nice an' quiet life, thank you very much.

Oh Hamburgers, everyone's started training! Percy told me I could pick out a sword today, I better go! Thanks for listening to me bitchin' about my day, Diary.

Your Friend, Butters