Kakuzu rolled his eyes as he walked into the building. New town, new school, but the same kind of idiots who'd stare at him, muttering. For god's sake, his scars weren't that bad! He sighed. There was nothing he could do about it. With any luck, they'd get over his looks and forget about his existence.

The teen walked down the main hall and into the office area. He'd been told to report to the principal upon arrival.

He entered the office and saw a young looking blonde sitting at the desk, filing papers. She looked up as he walked in. "Hello, and you are…?"

Kakuzu introduced himself and the woman smiled. "Oh right, the transfer kid. Well, Kakuzu, I'm principal Tsunade. Pleasure to meet you. Now, here's your schedule, and-"

Suddenly the door was flung open; Hidan stood in the doorway, foot raised in the air, indicating he'd kicked it open. "Hello, Tsunade!" He called cheerfully, grinning like a fool.

Tsunade's smile disappeared. "Hidan, you couldn't have waited one day to get into trouble, could you?"

"Hell no." He walked over and brushed past Kakuzu, flinging a pink slip of paper at the principal. "Same thing as always, Tsunade."

"Inappropriate language. Lovely." The woman paused for a moment, thinking. Suddenly, she smiled. "Hidan, instead of detention this time around, you're to show the new kid around."

The silver haired boy's smile disappeared. "WHAT?!"

"You heard me. Let me see your schedule." Hidan reluctantly handed the slip of paper over to the principal. "Perfect, you two have the exact same schedule. That'll make things easier for everyone."

"But-"

"No buts. Now beat it." Hidan turned around, grumbling and motioning for Kakuzu to follow him. "Damn hag," he muttered as they walked out. Once they were back in the hallway, he turned and looked Kakuzu up and down. "So, you gotta name new kid?"

"Kakuzu. And she said you were Hidan, right?"

"Hell yeah. Let me see your schedule." Kakuzu handed over the paper, and the Jashinist looked it up and down. "Science, math, world civ,.…damn, we really do have the exact same schedule." He started walking down the hall. "Come on, science is this way."

Kakuzu followed the kid down the crowded hallway. The bell should have rung five minutes ago, but so many freshmen were lost that it was practically impossible to get around "Jashin dammit, move it fresh meat!" Hidan yelled, kicking a boy out of the way. After that, Hidan and Kakuzu were given a wide berth.

They walked into a classroom at the end of the hall. The poorly lit room was filled with noisy students, most of whom were sitting on top of their desks. Hidan walked towards the back of the room, and Kakuzu, not knowing anyone, decided to follow him.

"Hey Hidan," a tall boy with blue skin called out. "So, you're in here too?"

"Yup. Looks like it's gonna be you, me, and Itachi." Kakuzu looked over and saw a small male with raven colored hair and twin scars running down from each eye. Itachi turned and looked at Kakuzu. "Hidan, who is this?"

The Jashinist turned to Kakuzu. "I got in trouble, so the old hag made me give this guy a Jashin damned school tour. Can you believe we've got the same schedule?"

"That's a bit odd," Itachi admitted. The teacher walked in at that moment, bringing a stop to all conversation. "Alright people, take your seat. I'll be nice and let you guys pick seats this time."

"He's only doing that 'cause he knows we'll give him hell otherwise," Kisame whispered to Kakuzu, who sat in front of him. Itachi was sitting next to Kisame, and Hidan was in front of him, next to Kakuzu. "Mr. Hoshigaki, is there a problem?"

The shark grinned. "No sir. Just explaining to the new kid how things work around here." The teacher glared at Kisame but turned back to the board.

Kakuzu found the school to be as boring as he expected. Shallow preps, idiot teachers, the whole nine yards. Even the school food was as bland as he'd predicted it to be. He settled on grabbing an apple; it was cheap, and they probably couldn't ruin prepackaged fruit.

Kisame and Itachi had the same lunch period as he and Hidan, so he assumed they'd sit at the same table. He was surprised to see the trio walk towards the emergency exit. "Why are we going outside?" he muttered to Hidan.

"Because it sucks in here," was his only answer.

"And the alarm won't go off?"

Hidan grinned. "Nope. Deidara took care of that little problem freshmen year."

"Who's Deidara?"

"You'll find out in a second." The four had finally gotten outside and walked around the side of a building, heading in the direction of the grassy area tucked behind the school.

Kakuzu saw that they were heading towards a large oak tree, with two people already there. One of them was a red head who sat in the shade of the mighty oak, looking bored as he dug through his backpack. The other was a tall blonde in a girl's uniform, eagerly watching as the red head looked through the mess of his bag. "Deidara, Sasori!" Kisame called out, making both students look up. The red head went back to looking through his bag, while Deidara waved to them, smiling. "Hey, un!" When they finally reached the shade of the ancient oak, the blonde looked Kakuzu up and down. "Who're you, un?"

The banker raised a brow. "I'm Kakuzu. Kinda rude, aren't you?"

"Huh?" Deidara turned to the red head. "He means you're supposed to introduce yourself first," Sasori answered, indicating he was used to answering the blonde's questions.

"Oh yeah! I'm Deidara, un! And before you ask, no, I am not a girl!"

Kakuzu gave him a weird look. "So you're just a cross-dresser?" Hidan burst out laughing, and the others smirked. Deidara frowned. "Nope, it's just tradition, un! You see, freshmen year-"

"Here it is," Sasori called out, pulling out a lunch box. Deidara squealed in delight and lunged at the red head, glomping him. "Thank you danna, un!" He snatched the food and scurried up into the tree, reminding Kakuzu of the squirrels he saw in parks. He gave the group a weird look. "What did he do freshmen year, why did you give him food, and should I be concerned that he called you danna?"

"He gave him food because Deidara can't afford to buy lunch," Itachi answered, climbing up the tree after Deidara and sitting a branch beneath him.

"And I couldn't bring my lunch because the only thing in the fridge was beer, un," Deidara called down through a mouthful of food.

"Don't talk with your mouth full, brat."

"Yes danna."

"And as soon as we figure out why he calls Sasori 'danna', we'll let you know," Hidan continued, following his two friends up the tree. Sasori and Kisame stayed on the ground, sitting, so Kakuzu decided to eat here with them; there was more room on terra firma, and less chance of injury. "What about the girl's outfit thing?"

Kisame grinned. "Well, way back at the beginning of our freshmen year, the school thought Deidara was a girl, and gave him a girl's uniform. Of course, Deidara was furious. He started yelling at them, and he even made the secretary cry. Unfortunately, they didn't have any more guy's uniforms, so he was stuck in a skirt for the day." Kisame snickered. "Well, everything was fine until third period.

You see, this teacher kept staring at him, and everyone noticed. Well, Deidara got sick of it, so he," Kisame was laughing too hard to continue, so he motioned for Sasori to finish. "He walked up to the teacher's desk, hips swaying, and he leaned forward-"

"And I whispered, 'Like what you see, un?' and I leaned forward on his desk, un," Deidara finished, smiling.

"Didn't you get written up?" Kakuzu asked.

"Oh, that's the best part," Kisame whispered. "You see, the teacher had a major nosebleed and had to run out of the classroom. It was hilarious.

He came back about twenty minutes later, and told Deidara to right a paper about the importance of a strong student/teacher relationship." Kisame couldn't stop smiling. "He really could have picked a better choice of words."

"Because that night," Hidan continued, "he told Konan about the assignment. Well, Konan got an evil idea and wrote the paper, and-" Hidan was laughing too hard finish.

"The paper," Sasori went on, "was a three page smut story of Deidara and the teacher." Kakuzu's eyes practically bugged out of his head. "Needless to say, the teacher had another nosebleed and had to excuse himself for the rest of the class. He threatened to expel Deidara, but Deidara argued that…Deidara, what did you say?"

The blonde stood on the branch he had been sitting on and cleared his throat, plastering a fearful look on his face. "It's not me that you should get rid of, un! He's a pervert, and I'm scared that if I stay after class he'll rape me, un!" He smiled and bowed, sitting back down.

"And so," Kisame said, continuing where the red head had left off, "the teacher was fired, and no one messed with us after that, for fear we'd try something similar."

"And every year I wear a girl's uniform on the first day to see if we have any perverts for teachers, un," Deidara finished.

Kakuzu nodded. "Great, but who's Konan?"

"Oh yeah, you haven't met her or Pein yet," Hidan exclaimed. "They were seniors our freshmen year. Deidara and I met them in summer school the year before, and we became friends then. We ended up hanging out in high school, along with Zetsu and Tobi."

"Were they seniors too?" Kakuzu asked, noting that there were no other people present.

Hidan shook his head. "Nope. Same year as us. But Zetsu's schizophrenic; you know, two personalities, one body? Well, it got really bad last year, and his doctor told him to take some time off normal life; go on a trip, travel around the world. And of course, Tobi had to go with him. It's impossible to separate those two."

"I wonder how they're doing, un."

--somewhere in the Mediterranean Sea, off the coast of Italy--

"Zetsu, look! Seagulls!" Tobi was jumping up and down, leaning on the ship's railing and pointing towards the birds flying near the coast.

"Yes, Tobi, those are seagulls. Dumbass. Be good, Tobi's not bugging you. Yes he is. No he's not!"

"Zetsu, I want a seagull!" Tobi bent forward, half his torso dangling over the rail now.

"Tobi, stop leaning, or you'll-"

"WAAAAAAH, ZETSU!" Tobi screamed as he fell off the ship and plunged into the water.

"……………..We should let him drown. Don't tempt me. Man overboard!"

--

"Hey, what time is it?" Kakuzu asked, finally noticing how long they'd been out here.

Itachi glanced at his wristwatch. "1:30."

"That means we missed fifth period, right?" Kakuzu asked.

Hidan nodded. "Yup, but no worries; it was just P.E. The teacher knows we can beat the crap out of anyone in this place, so we'll get full credit whether we show up or not. Consider this an extended lunch period." Hidan turned to Sasori. "Hey, Sasori, what class do you and blondie have next period?"

"Language. Why?"

Hidan's eyes widened. "No way, we've got the same class!"

"All of us?" Kisame asked incredulously. "Damn, they're usually pretty good about splitting us up. Wonder what happened?"

"From what I understand, there was only one language teacher in the entire school that was willing to take us this year, and sixth period is the only non-remedial class he teaches," Itachi explained, standing up on his branch. Kisame looked at the Uchiha and rose to his feet, holding out his arms as Itachi jumped down. The weasel landed in the safety of the shark's arms, before looking back up into the tree. "Come on, let's go."

Deidara and Hidan climbed down quickly, following Kisame and Itachi. Sasori rose and followed them, with Kakuzu trailing behind them. The banker was beginning to think that all his new friends were crazy. "This year should be more interesting than I thought…"