I didn't change much in this chapter.

For some reason I wrote in past tense for the first couple chapters.

Disclaimer: I only own the story

Chapter 2

"Fuck you! I don't need to you tell me what to fucking do!" I scream at the smug nurse.

I slam my fist into the wall to vent some of the anger out. I want to punch that bitch so bad. But I don't hit girls. I'm not my dad. I wouldn't ever punch a girl like what he did to my mom. That's just weak. I'm not weak.

"Now Riku, you need to learn to control your anger to get better. Don't abuse the walls," says the nurse with a small smile.

She was enjoying this! She liked making me upset.

I take a shaky breathe trying to fight the hot feeling of rage bubbling up in my stomach. If I don't control it then I will just black out and wake up punching the shit out of something or someone. Something I really don't want to happen…again.

"Whatever cunt," I turn and walk down the hall away from the nurse. She always makes a point to piss me off. She just loves my reactions. The staff here is a joke. They don't help us.

I storm into my room. I have to share with this neat freak named Sora. My therapist said I needed to get use to being around people. So he didn't let me have a single room. I try not to flip out on Sora too much. But, sometimes I really can't stop some stuff I say.

I collapse on my bed trying to focus on making my mind empty. I don't want to think about anything.

I don't want to feel anything.

I wish I could have some sedatives. But I can only get them by having a meltdown, which isn't an option right now.

Calm I am Calm. Calm I am Calm. Calm I am Calm.

That's the mantra that I repeat over and over in my head. My therapist told me to use this as a mechanism to take my mind off the anger. I don't know if it's working. I still feel mad. I always feel mad. It never leaves.

My roommate decides to stroll into the room at this moment. Sora floats around on this cloud of bubbly rainbow optimistic thoughts. He doesn't get it. He doesn't understand that by being in this place he is branded a plague to society. We are the worst of the worst. We have to be removed from the normal people. And just by being here and experiencing this, we will never ever be normal. We never were normal…

"Hey Riku, how are you? It's a great day isn't it? There's a new guy named Axel. I'm not sure why he's here. His arm is all bandaged up. Oh gosh this room is messy," says Sora in his ever present happiness.

He starts smoothing his perfectly made bed. I try to ignore him. But then he comes over to my bed and starts tugging at the comforter trying to straighten it.

I sit up lightning fast and shove him away.

"Don't touch my stuff," I say as calm as I can. Sora is really nice to me. Even if he is a deluded, jaded, brainwashed neat freak. I don't want to yell and make him cry…again.

"Okay. I'm sorry. It's just not straight. But I won't let that bother me. It doesn't bother me," says Sora. His eye twitches slightly and he sits down on his bed clasping his hands.

"Wow you're really getting better," I say carefully. Sora always likes to talk about how much progress he's making. In my opinion he just covers up his neat freak ways very well.

"Oh yes. Dr. Ansem told me I was making progress quickly. I'll probably get to go home soon," replies Sora happily. I heard nurses talking about him yesterday. They said Ansem told them to up his meds dosage. Which means Sora isn't getting better. I feel bad for him. He's so hopeful.

"That's really great Sora," I say half heartily.

"Lunch time," says a nurse poking her head in our room.

I stand up and walk out of the room. I look back in the room to see Sora straightening my bed.

Meal times are always very hectic, all the psychos in one room at the same time, the nursing staff running around calming down the patients.

I sit down at my usual table with some of the patients that don't piss me off as much as the others. Which includes a guy named Zexion. He has weird purplish hair that hung in his face. He doesn't talk very much and mostly keeps to himself. I'm not sure why he's here exactly.

There's a guy named Roxas. He is really weird. I'm not sure why he's here either. But I am positive he is a Class A nut job. He's always muttering about colors and doing some downright weird things. Demyx also sits with us. He has this weird spiked up mullet hair thing going on. Demyx has two personalities. One is really happy and bubbly. But the other is serious and mean, sometimes violent. I'm never sure which one I'm talking to.

Sora usually sits with us. But he's probably straightening my bed still.

I start eating my sandwich when Sora walks up leading a guy with flaming red hair and triangle tattoos under his eyes. His hand is wrapped in bandages.

"This is Axel; he's new, Axel that's Riku, Roxas, Demyx, and Zexion," introduces Sora. Sora sits down and Axel sits next to him. There's something weird about Axel. He doesn't seem nervous or anything. But he doesn't bother talking to any of us. All he does I pick at his sandwich and glance at Roxas every few seconds.

Roxas stares at the table. He doesn't eat his sandwich. He never eats at meal times. Maybe he's anorexic? That would make sense.

My thoughts are interrupted by a loud yelling from across the cafeteria.

"BUT I DON'T WANT TO GO AMONG MAD PEOPLE!" screams a blonde girl in a blue dress. I think her name is Alice. A nurse is dragging her by the wrist to a table. It's the bitch nurse from this morning. Just seeing her makes me pissed off.

I turn back around and look at Demyx who is giggling. He has his hand over his mouth to try to hide it. But I see it.

"What's your damage?" I spit at him.

"Haha…I don't know…hahaha….it's just funny…," Demyx says between fits of laughter.

I stare at him. My shoulders tense up. His laughing is making me angry. I don't like when people laugh. It makes me feel like they are laughing at me. Demyx is an idiot. I just want to rip his vocal cords out so he can never laugh again.

"Sooo….are you prematurely gray or something?" I whip my head to glare at the dumbass that said that. The new guy Axel shrinks back from me, shocked at my expression.

I tried to fight it. I really did.

I spring up from the table and punch him right in the face. He topples out of his chair with a cry of surprise.

I stand over him my breath coming out in ragged gasps.

I want to kick him!

Stomp on his face!

Make him into a gory smear on the tiled floor!

But I stop myself. I won't give in!

I. Am. Not. Weak.

"Say something about my hair again and I will rip yours out strand by fucking strand," I yell in his face.

"Dude, just calm down!" He says raising his hands up in an 'I give up' gesture. I can tell he's afraid of me and that makes me even more mad.

"Don't tell me to calm down! You can't tell me what to do you dumb fuck!" I scream raising a fist to pummel him with. But before I can move my arm another inch, one of the male orderlies grabs me from behind in a bear hug.

"NOOO! Let me GO! Get the fuck off me! You're lucky new guy! Count your blessings!" I wail as the orderly tries to drag me off.

I fight back tooth and nail. Another orderly has to come help restrain me. I buck and kick and scream but they won't let me go. They try to say stuff to calm me down, but a red haze in my head won't let me listen. I can't control it. It's like the anger in the pit of my stomach trying to get out of me any way possibly.

The orderlies wrestle me onto a gurney and start strapping my arms and legs down. I don't like it. I don't like the orderlies touching me. I don't like not being able to move.

"Get off me you-," I'm cut off as a syringe was stabbed in my arm.

Oh great, sedatives, just what I wanted earlier.

I fight back but my strength is failing me. The drug is making me weak. I collapse back on the gurney. I am weak.

I gave in to my anger.

I am weak.

My vision is starting to darken. I tried to fight it.

But I gave in.

I gave in to the darkness.

I am weak.

Worthless.

Destructive

.........

Yeah...same shizz happened.

The next one won't change much either.

Because it is the gloriousness of a look in Roxas' head!

I screwed up the later chapters of him. And Axel's character got screwed up. So I'm going to try and fix that.

I'm going to introduce Hayner earlier. Tweak his character a bit.

Sora is going to go a completly different way.

And Demyx's split personality is going to be a little more...noticable...but same dilemma.

Pretty much...anything after chapter 11 will be totally different with only some conversations and thoughts kept.

Review? Because I loooooooove them.