Author's note: thanks to all those that read and liked the first chapter! this chapter came out super fast, but i'm afraid this fic is going to be a slow burn. enjoy!

Chapter 2

The next morning Rey left the crystals tucked away in her bunk, bundled up in a scrap of cloth in a drawer. Her body ached, her energy reserves depleted from the extraordinary efforts of the night before. It didn't help that sleep had evaded her as her mind replayed her contact with Ben.

Her mind obsessed over every detail, lingered on the catch in his breathing as their bond drew them together from across the galaxy, fixated on his bare hands as they hovered above her own. Sadness and regret had swirled in the pit of her stomach, making her almost sick with anxiety and missed opportunity.

So much had happened to her in only a matter of weeks. Even her optimism and determination faltered under the weight of it all. She had glimpsed the goodness of Ben Solo inside the monstrous facade of Kylo Ren. She had spoken with him in the most intimate and personal of ways across the stars. She had dared to hope and raced to his side in an attempt to bring him back to the light, only to see Kylo Ren reject the truth of his past.

And, though he had reached out to her, had implored her to join him, Rey could not. She could not abandon her friends, could not watch Ben retreat once more behind his mask. Although he begged her to let the past die - kill it, if you have to - his actions on Crait only proved his inability to take hold of the future she had glimpsed for them.

Yet he had wordlessly, selflessly helped her repair the crystal from Luke's lightsaber. Rey had not seen his face, had not allowed herself that luxury, but neither had she sensed the soul-wrenching conflict she had come to associate him with.

And so Rey wandered the dilapidated base in a haze that morning, confusion uppermost in her thoughts. After all he had done and everything she had seen, she still held onto the impossible hope of the redemption of Ben Solo.

So deep was her own inner conflict that Rey didn't hear her name being called until an exasperated Finn blocked her path.

"Rey are you okay?" he asked when she finally came to a stop.

Rey blinked. "Hmm?" It took a moment for his words to register but then she offered a smile. "I'm fine. How's Rose?"

Concern allayed for the moment, Finn beamed. "They finally let her out of bed. I mean, the medic told her to stay put, but they didn't really stop her when she got up to help with the base repairs . . ." he trailed off and peered at Rey speculatively. "Actually, I know you're probably busy with the whole Force thing but did you want to help me and Rose with some of the communication systems? Poe says we need 'em quick."

Relieved to have a task other than studying or meditating, Rey nodded and followed Finn, letting his enthusiastic chatter pull her out of her morose state.

As she worked with Finn and Rose that morning, Rey found herself slipping into an easy camaraderie with the pair. She listened in earnest to their escapade on Canto Bight, using the vivid imagination she honed on Jakku to picture the glittering world and its inhabitants. As she had just after the Battle of Crait, Rey found herself watching her companions closely, observing Finn's care and attention to Rose. She noticed how he supported the other young woman at every turn, affection evident in his eyes and body language.

For a moment Rey felt a pang of jealousy tug at her heart, but not over Finn's obvious feelings (or even Rose's matching sentiments). Rather she yearned for something deeper, something more complicated and raw. As she watched Finn offer his hand to help Rose stand, Rey's memories brought forth the image of a different outstretched hand, one tremulous and unsure.

But then Finn made a joke and Rey forced herself back to the present, laughing as she enjoyed her time with her friends.

Their joviality continued through lunch, their spirits dampened by neither the terrible rations nor the desperation of their situation. The shattered Resistance had fled to Lothal, a precarious position at best, but their optimism could not be cowed. They had endured heavy, crippling losses but Luke's showing on Crait had revived their hope.

Now they worked feverishly to set up communication channels and find out what remained of forces sympathetic to their cause. The First Order had not bothered to take control of Lothal, but without the political posturing of the New Republic or the full might of the Resistance, it would not be long before stormtroopers pervaded every corner of the galaxy.

When Leia found her, Rey was fiddling with some frayed and tangled wires, regaling her friends with some of the better stories from Niima Outpost. Finn and Rose proved the perfect audience, hanging wide-eyed at every twist and turn of the tale, gasping in outrage at just the right moments. As the General approached, the three of them were roaring in laughter.

When she saw Leia, Rey paused, a strange sensation taking hold of her. She couldn't quite say why her stomach churned – the General's genial expression gave nothing away – but Rey reacted swiftly. She stood a little too fast and, murmuring her excuses, left the remainder of the work in Rose's capable hands.

"Leia, I –"

The older woman tucked Rey's arm beneath her own and smoothly turned them towards the exit. "Rey, I'd like to ask how your studies are going."

Caught off guard, Rey could only gape. Leia patted her hand. "Any luck with those kyber crystals?"

Rey recovered quickly. "Yes. And something else happened . . ." She trailed off, unsure of how much to say. But she needn't have bothered, for the knowing look in Leia's eyes caught her hesitation.

"Is it something about my son?"

Rey stiffened, looking about them quickly. It was only then that she realized Leia had led them to an abandoned and derelict wing of the base. No one would disturb or overhear them.

"Chewie told me about your side trip to the Supremacy. Tell me – what happened with Ben?"

Sighing, Rey gave in and the entire story came tumbling from her lips in a rush. While she had hesitated to reveal the nature of her connection with Ben to Luke, telling Leia gave Rey a sense of relief. If anyone would understand what she had seen behind Kylo Ren's mask, it was the beloved General.

Leia remained silent for such a long moment that Rey began to doubt her own feelings. But then – "He helped you heal the crystal?" Leia posed the question in a low, ponderous voice, but Rey sensed the older woman wanted to ask something else.

"Yes."

"And he said nothing?"

Rey shook her head. "But I didn't feel any malice or hate from him, just . . ."

"Yes?"

Thinking back to that moment, Rey tried to recall the details. Even though she had concentrated so dearly on the crystals, her heart could not have ignored the presence of the man at her side. "Regret," she finally voiced. "I sensed regret."

"What are your orders, Supreme Leader?"

Kylo Ren turned towards General Hux, struggling to contain the rage the sallow man incited in him. He said nothing, allowing silence to fill the room as Hux's impatience swelled. Just when the military man seemed on the verge of an insolent outburst, Kylo responded.

"I trust your military expertise, General. After all, who better to facilitate the supremacy of the First Order than its premier son?"

Sensing Kylo Ren's sarcasm but unable to identify it, General Hux instead took the opportunity to step into the role he had already envisioned for himself. After all, had he not been the one to suggest using Mustafar as a base of operations? It conjured up the strength of the old Empire while simultaneously holding Kylo Ren in place. Surely even the Master of the Knights of Ren would see the need for a permanent seat of power. And, after the childish display on Crait, Kylo would have to defer to more reasoned minds. Of which Hux saw himself as more than capable.

"Are you still of the opinion that hunting down the last of the rebel scum would be a waste of resources?"

Kylo's response was dark and immediate. "Yes." He made an impatient motion with his hands. "We have larger concerns. You might have dealt with the New Republic, but I can assure you there's much to be done before we can restore order to the galaxy."

This time, Hux caught the intended insult. Kylo Ren did not approve of his ruthless methods, but at least Hux delivered quantifiable results. He did not prescribe to archaic magic or chase legends beyond all reason. He was in the business of pacifying the galaxy, of bringing stability and perfection out of the chaos sown by the self-serving New Republic. Achieving that goal would not be easy or clean.

Truthfully, Hux resented Kylo Ren's hold on the seat of power, and he largely suspected that Supreme Leader Snoke's death had not come so simply at the hands of some nameless desert scavenger. But until Hux could prove his suspicions without a shadow of a doubt, he could not convince the rest of the First Order to support the removal of Kylo Ren. Many within the upper echelons still subscribed to the superstitious idea of an arcane master ruling from the shadows.

"Very well. Then we shall commence with bringing the Core Worlds to heel. Too long have they enjoyed the comfort of their economic position. If we can take control of their shipping routes we can use the subsequent wealth to replace our assets."

Kylo Ren nodded. "And stricter control on those routes will ensure a more manageable criminal element."

Hux paused, taken aback by Kylo Ren's astute assessment. Although the First Order had taken advantage of the flourishing criminal underworld during the reign of the New Republic, smugglers and thieves had little place in their vision of a more perfect galaxy. Increased security along the shipping lanes would force gangs like Kanjiklub to limit their illicit activities. From there, the First Order could take the time to route them from the lairs as they took systematic control of the galaxy. That Kylo Ren understood such nuanced strategy came as a surprise. It seemed the Force user had served as more than just a mad dog enforcer. Perhaps in the absence of Snoke's manipulation, Kylo Ren would prove a capable leader. More's the pity.

"Is there anything else?" Hux demanded. He barely caught himself in time. ". . . Supreme Leader?"

Kylo Ren's thoughts turned inward and he no longer paid Hux his full attention. "That will be all, General." He didn't notice the redhead's smirk as he left the room. Instead, he considered the complication from the night before.

No matter what he indicated to General Hux, Kylo Ren understood that even a handful of Resistance members could prove an infectious thorn in the First Order's side. He knew from experience that Leia Organa would hold tenaciously onto hope with every fiber of her being. And he was beginning to recognize the same stubborn trait in Rey. Everything that made the girl a worthy opponent also made her someone to admire. In all their interactions, she displayed a fierce loyalty to her friends and a boundless capacity for hope.

Yet she rejected him. With tears shimmering in her eyes, she reached for Luke's lightsaber. And when the dust had settled, she left him lying on the floor amidst the aftermath of the destruction he had wrought. For her. Was he so beyond redemption?

He felt adrift, more conflicted than when under the influence of Snoke's machinations. His heart faltered and yearned for something he could never have. She was never coming back. In that moment, occupying the seat of power in the First Order, he regretted his actions on Crait.

How many years had he spent searching for Luke, waiting for his chance to destroy the man who betrayed him? But, standing on that barren salt field watching his uncle fade into death, Kylo felt not an ounce of elation or triumph. Instead he felt deflated; all the rage and pain he had cultivated in the fires of the Dark side melted away to reveal only emptiness and regret.

And the only thing that could possibly assuage his guilt and fear was the sight of her hand in his.

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I want to thank everyone who favorites, follows, or reviews!