Well obviously I'm not going to let her kill him. I draw my gun. "Let him go."
"Hell no!"
I pull my badge out of my pocket. "Federal agent. Let him go or I'm going to have to shoot you."
She lets him go, but she shoots me in the chest. I look down. Peeta looks like he's going to die.
"Bullet proof vest."
She hisses. "Bitch."
"Drop your weapon." I hiss. She tightens her grip and moves the head so it's facing my forehead. Paylor comes out of the closet and doesn't get out a single word before Mrs. Mellark moves the gun to Paylor and shoots her.
She shoots her right in the head.
Well, it's not like it's the first time.
Gale and Boggs come out too. And then Jackson.
I don't want to kill Peeta's mom, but I have to, it's my job. Brandon and Katie are screaming. She moves to shoot them but I pull the trigger. Her eyes get all wide, and she drops the gun. I shot her in the stomach. She falls down.
"Kill her." Peeta grits his teeth. "Shoot her in the forehead."
"Do it, Katniss." Cress covers her face. I pull the trigger again.
The rest of the FBI that came with us, that weren't in first class come flooding into the house.
They look at Paylor, who is dead.
"Maybe they didn't shoot her in the brain?" Gale asks weakly. I drop down next to her.
"She's dead, Gale." I say. I check her pulse anyways. "She's dead."
Ambulances come and load up Paylor and Dixie.
One of the EMT's looks at me and says, "You okay?" He points to my chest.
"Oh. Yeah, I'm fine."
They leave.
I look at Jackson, Gale and Boggs.
"We should go." I mutter.
"Let's go." Gale says.
I look at Peeta's family. "Well uh..." I hesitate. "I'm glad you guys are okay."
"Thanks." Mr. Mellark says. "All of you. We had no idea…that she was going to do that. You saved our lives." Gale, Boggs and Jackson stay quiet.
"Well…that's what we do. There's no need to thank us." I help Brandon and Katie up. Prim and Finn are calm. I don't even think they care. I head for the door and Boggs, Gale and Jackson follow. Katie, Brandon, Prim and Finn are walking in front of me.
Cress says something at Peeta and she sounds angry.
"Katniss, can you wait just a second?" Peeta says.
Boggs, Jackson and Gale shoot me a look. I move out of their way. They shut the door behind themselves. "Hang on." He says. He disappears, and I wait by the door, fiddling with my gun.
And then, the idiot I am, I accidentally set it off, right through the window. "Oh my fuck," I walk into the living room. "I didn't mean to do that! Oh god, I'll pay to fix it, I swear!"
"It's fine." Mr. Mellark says.
"No it's really not."
"Yes it is. You just saved my family. I'm not going to let you pay to fix it."
"No, I can't just not-"
"You can and you will." He says. I put my gun away.
"I'm sorry."
He laughs. "It's okay Katniss, really."
"You and Peeta should so totally make babies." Cress says.
"I can't believe I did that." I say. Peeta comes back downstairs. He starts laughing when he sees the window. He hands me a CD.
"Here, I want you to have this."
"What is it?" I ask.
"Just…something."
"Um…okay. Thanks." I give him his shirt and exit.
…a…
It's snowing back home in Boston, Massachusetts. I'm lying on my couch in the dark in a white long sleeve shirt and a pair of worn down sweats, watching the flames in the fireplace.
I've always regretted leaving Peeta because of that stupid fight. Then I had my chance to fix things and I left. Why the fuck am I always leaving?
It's early October and I'm twenty three.
Peeta was my first. He wasn't my first kiss, because that was Cato, but he was my first time.
The thing that hurts the most is we had done it the same exact day that I left.
It's like…
God, it must seem like I used him for sex and then just left.
He probably thinks I hate him.
God why am I such a fuck up?
And npot only did I lose Peeta, but I lost Johanna and Annie, too. I haven't spoken to them since that day we broke up.
Even Finn can't stand me.
I still remember Johanna's words before she left.
"I'm so done! Katniss, until you can get your head out of your ASS and fix this, I can't talk to you."
Annie nods in agreement and follows Jo out the door. Finn follows.
The only time I've seen Finn since then is at holidays.
I avoid them at all costs, but when I avoid holidays it upsets Mom.
My only salvation in my fucked up life right now is my job.
When I'm not working, I realize just how depressed I really am.
Why? Why'd I leave? Why'd Jo and Annie leave?
My own brother left me.
My mother even gets annoyed with me now because I'm a fuck up. I look at the disk Peeta gave to me and then I snatch it up and put it in the stereo.
I sit on the floor and wait.
I have the volume turned down. I grab my soft blanket off the couch and sit down on the floor in front of the stereo. I wrap myself up.
"Katniss," Peeta's voice says. "I know this is weird but I never stop thinking about you." He pauses. "I should never have let you go. I should have stopped you. I should have made you listen to me. Letting you leave was the worst mistake in my entire life. Katniss, I'm not stupid. I know you. I know you have regrets too. I know all those times you said you loved me, you meant it. I'm still in love with you, more than ever now, and I've learnt something over all of these years. You don't realize how much you love someone until they're gone."
A song starts playing just then, and I feel a pang in my chest because I know this song. It's Remind Me by Carrie Underwood and Brad Paisley.
We didn't care if people stared
We'd make out in a crowd somewhere
Somebody'd tell us to get a room
It's hard to believe that was me and you
Now we keep saying that we're okay
But I don't want to settle for good not great
I miss the way that it felt back then I wanna feel that way again
[Brad:] Been so long that you'd forget the way I used to kiss your neck
[Carrie:] Remind me, remind me
[Brad:] So on fire so in love. Way back when we couldn't get enough
[Carrie:] Remind me, remind me
[Carrie:]
Remember the airport dropping me off
We were kissing goodbye and we couldn't stop
[Brad:] I felt bad cause you missed your flight
[Carrie and Brad:] But that meant we had one more night
[Carrie:]
Do you remember how it used to be
We'd turn out the lights and we didn't just sleep
[Brad:] Remind me, baby, remind me
[Carrie:]
Oh, so on fire so in love
That look in your eyes that I miss so much
[Brad:] Remind me, baby, remind me
[Brad:] I wanna feel that way
[Carrie:] Yeah, I wanna hold you close
[Brad and Carrie]
Oh, if you still love me
Don't just assume I know
[Carrie:] Baby, remind me, remind me
[Carrie:] Do you remember the way it felt?
[Brad:] You mean back when we couldn't control ourselves
[Carrie:] Remind me
[Brad:] Yeah, remind me
[Carrie:]
All those things that you used to do
That made me fall in love with you
Remind me, oh, baby, remind me
[Brad:]
Yeah, you'd wake up in my old t-shirt
All those mornings I was late for work
Remind me
[Brad and Carrie] Oh, baby, remind me
[Carrie:] Oh, baby, remind me, baby, remind me
[Brad:] Yeah, you'd wake up in my old t-shirt
[Carrie:] Remind me, yeah, oh
[Brad:] Baby, remind me
I'm crying now.
"Just think about it, okay?" Peeta says. The disk stops.
And I don't know why, but I replay it over and over again.