Behind These Eyes,
Part Two.

After an indefinable length of time, Elsie became aware of something - no, someone holding her, gently shaking her, desperately trying to wake her up. A soft, pleading voice rose from the darkness, "Elsie! Elsie, please wake up, please…"

As she slowly became aware of her body, she realised a dull aching in her head, which, as she noticed it, seemed to swiftly spread through her body and become increasingly more painful. She tried to open her eyes, to show she was awake, but she didn't seem capable, the pain was in total control of her body.

The voice continued pleading, and Elsie realised that she recognised the voice, but the name just would not come to her. Familiar gentle fingers came up to her neck, feeling her weakening pulse. She desperately tried to show that she was still alive, but the pain just wouldn't allow her.

A dazzling, piercing light seemed to come out of the darkness; She had managed to open her eyes. As they adjusted to the sudden brightness, she realised that it wasn't actually bright at all, it was dark. How long had she been there? Searching for the person holding her, her eyes met a worried dark brown pair, which could only belong to one person, but his name was still forgotten. Trying to remember, she looked more closely. His honey-coloured skin seemed darker in the semi-darkness, and thick black curls fell over his eyes as he looked down at her.

"You're alive" he breathed, relieved. His grip on her tightened, as if afraid he would still lose her. When she didn't reply, he realised she wasn't as okay as he thought. Her eyes suddenly widened, as if in shock, and closed suddenly. Her breathing slowed, she mumbled something so quietly a normal person wouldn't have been able to hear, but of course, Raphael was no normal person. "Save me…please…"

Raphael froze. He knew what she meant - but she was Nephilim. He couldn't do that to her, turn her family against her, make her into a monster, like him. But she was dying. He couldn't just let her die like this, when he could still save her - but would she be happy, if he saved her? Would she not mind being a monster? Her family would turn their backs on her, for sure. Even if they didn't, she could never return to the institute, for it was hallowed ground. Could he do this? Could he damn her to an eternity of the night? As her heartbeat slowed even more, he knew needed to decide now. I need to do this. I can't spend forever knowing that I could have saved her…

His hands found their way back up to her neck, he shifted her body slightly in his arms, so it was easier for him. As his razor-sharp teeth met the soft, warm skin, her body tensed, subconsciously waiting for the pain which would never come - instead, everything disappeared, and she was pleasantly numb to the world.

Elsie awoke in an unfamiliar place, and very alone. Wherever she was, it was dark and rather small, with a horrible, clinging smell of dampness. Trying to breathe, she didn't seem able to, yet there was no feeling of breathlessness. She knew she needed to get out, but had no idea how. Hardly aware of what she was doing, she began to claw at the earth-like ceiling above her, with strength she never aware she had.

The next thing Elsie was aware of, she was standing in a gloomy place full of humped, shadowy objects. A unbearable burning began in the back of her throat, at the same time she noticed a figure standing before her, leaning against a darkened shape, his long, thin arms extended holding out something, as if an offering. With a strange stinging in her lip, she discovered that her teeth were sharp, pointed, pushing down on her lip. With a lunge, she snatched away what the boy was holding out, ripping open the sachet, messily swallowing the deep red liquid inside.

Looking back at the boy in front of her, then down at her bloody hands, she understood. So he had saved her, after all. Truthfully, she wasn't counting on him to actually save her, she thought he wouldn't be able to. For what was she supposed to do now? She didn't even feel like herself anymore. Who was she? She had just watched her brother murdered, then killed two men herself, something that Elsie Lightwood would never have been capable of. What now? She just wanted everything to be normal again. With a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, she remembered that she can never go into the institute again. Never be able to live normally, surrounded by her friends, her family…Never see Braedon again. How could she live without him? All her life, they had been together, she could always count on him. Now, she felt so empty, so alone. Well, she had Raphael, who she had recently become friends with, but she didn't fancy living the rest of her life in the Hotel. What she needed, she realised, is a new start, somewhere new, where she could find herself again.

"How are you feeling?" The other vampire asked softly, cautiously approaching her, as if she were to lash out at him at any moment.
How am I feeling? How does he think I feel? She wanted to tell him how hurt she was, but she knew that he had only meant physically. She felt strange, different, but okay. The pain she had felt earlier had disappeared, as well as the burning in her throat. Looking around, her eyesight was much better than before. Her surroundings were no longer dark and shadowed, just a different colour, a few shades darker than as if it were daylight.

Eyes returning to Raphael, she noticed that he was leaning against a motorcycle, which seemed almost to be alive. With an unfamiliar feeling, she realised that neither of them really were, which meant neither was she. It seemed such a strange thought, that she was dead. With that, her previous thoughts returned, the ideas of escaping this place and having a new beginning.

The boy was still watching her, waiting for her reply, concerned brown eyes locking into her own. She opened her mouth, to answer, but instead found herself asking, "Your motorbike. Can I use it?"
He looked startled. Clearly something he wasn't expecting her to say.

"Why?" But he already knew, even though his heart doesn't beat, he still felt human emotions, he knew how she was feeling.

"I just need to get away" she replied, as he knew she would. But, he knew that by away, she hadn't meant just for a little while. If she went, she would never return.

He nodded reluctantly, hardly aware that he had. As she approached him - no, the motorcycle, he realised he didn't want her to leave, to go away forever. Would he ever see her again? He had already almost lost her once…

As she mounted the bike, she looked back, about to say farewell.

"Let me come with you", He asked - more like pleaded.

Elsie could see that he was hurt. Had she really meant that much to him? Seeing the pain in his eyes, it was so tempting to just say yes. But she knew she couldn't. Looking away, she mumbled "I'm sorry."

As the bike took off from the ground, Elsie thought she heard a quiet, "Be safe."

But it was spoken so softly, that it may have just been a whisper of the wind.

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