Stacey sat up in bed, rubbing her eyes as sunlight streamed in through the windows. She was staying in a hotel just outside London. She had arrived yesterday, struggling to keep her emotions together. The receptionist gave her an odd look but said nothing. If Stacey had been herself, she would have snapped, 'What you lookin' at?' but she wasn't, too caught up in her grief. If the earth had collapsed this minute, she would be glad, because it meant she would be with Bradley for eternity.
She sat up in bed, struggling to remember where she was and why. Then she realized. Tears prickled at the corner of her eyes, but she wouldn't let them fall. She got out of her bed and zipped open her suitcase, carefully taken out her and Bradley's wedding photo. She smiled, forgetting all her troubles for a moment. But only for a moment, as it dawned on her she would never be that happy ever again. Her vision became blurred, her eyes misty with tears and she blinked several times. She clutched the frame, clearly remembering her and Bradley's wedding day, when everything was so perfect. She ran her finger along the photo, staring intently at Bradley. Before she could start crying again, quickly placed the photo in the suitcase and zipped it up.
She realized she would have to come home eventually, but the thought of living in Walford without Bradley by her side, was unbearable. It wasn't just herself she had to think about. She had to think of her baby, she had to be strong for him/her but it wouldn't be easy. How could she even raise her baby without Bradley there? What was the point of living without Bradley? There really was no point in going back to Walford. What was there for her anymore? NOTHING.
But then she thought of her mum, her mum who loved her so much and would be heartbroken if she refused to return home. She decided she would only stay away for a couple of weeks, a month, maybe two, but she couldn't return right now, she just couldn't. She knew she'd never get over Bradley. She'd never be happy again, without him. Braldey was the love of her life, it was like the night he died, he had tore out her heart, that left her broken inside, like a glass that had just been smashed. Life without Bradley was unthinkable.
Without warning, Stacey began to cry as she thought of her late husband. Bradley had died on their wedding day, they didn't even get the pleasure of a honey-moon he was swiped away so cruelly.
Its all my fault, Stacey thought as tears streamed down her cheeks.
Why did I let Bradley take the rap, why didn't I tell the police, why? I was selfish and now Bradley's dead and it's all my fault! I've lost him forever! Why?! Why didn't I tell the police after I killed Archie?! Why did I have to let Bradley die! THIS IS ALL MY FAULT. Bradley would be still here if It wasn't for me!
At this, Stacey unzipped her suitcase and grabbed Bradley's red and white wooly jumber, crying quietly into it. The night she murdered Archie was still so vivid in her mind, she still had nightmares, the night she'd killed him she had a horrible flashback of when he raped her and when she murdered him and he was chasing after her vowing revenge. She had woken up, bedclothes twisted around her, she was screaming like she was having a fit and she'd woken up tears streaming down her face, her forehead hot with sweat, to find Bradley gently soothing her, rocking her back and forth, wiping away her tears and brushing her hair back from her face.
She had shakingly told him she'd dreamed Archie had raped her again and Bradley had taken her face in his hands and told her he would never ever let anyone hurt her again. He'd kissed her and hugged her protectively until she had fallen asleep in his arms. If she hadn't murdered Archie everything would be different. He'd still be lurking around, but with Bradley's help and encouragement, Stacey would of have reported him to the police, he'd be locked up in a cell, Bradley and Stacey would've got married and right now Bradley and Stacey would be on their honeymoon, blissfully happy, ready to take whatever was thrown at them. If only…