Beetlejuice tapped his long fingers against the worn and scratched surface of the coffee table that was covered in dusty magazines. How could this have happened? He should have been free as a bird since he married that little live girl, too bad he didn't get a chance to kiss the bride. He shook his head and scowled at the blue-skinned receptionist.

"What the fuck am I doing here?" he spat at her, "I should be doing whiskey shots in some bar in New York or Chicago, not in this mother fuckin' place again."

The receptionist glanced up from her paperwork with mild disinterest in the ghost. "I am not the one who got eaten, you did," she said and shuffled the papers that were in front of her, "now sit down and wait for your turn to see Juno."

"Bitch," Beetlejuice said and leaned back against the molded couch in the waiting room. God he hated this fucking place, almost as much as he hated Saturn. If there was anything he hated more than sandworms it was being bored and there wasn't a goddamn thing he could do in this place except sit and wait.

Beetlejuice read all of the magazines that were strewn about the waiting room until he had each word memorized. He tried to have conversations with the others who were waiting, but all they would do was sit and blink at him until he rolled his eyes and sat in silence.

This shouldn't be happening to me, he thought. I should be out; I am supposed to be free. I could kill that bitch all over again for sending me back here. Beetlejuice felt his energy bottling up on him and if he didn't let it out soon he was going to explode. He bounded out of his seat and began to pace the small area of the room, but it wasn't enough. I was almost out, I was almost free, he thought as he paced faster.

That bitch and that fuckin' family caused this, it's their fault. Rage poured inside him and filled him to capacity. It collected in his chest, arms and legs and made him pulse with raw energy. He laid down on the dirty floor and pushed upwards. It hurt like a son of a bitch, but it was something to do and he hated this nothingness. Exercising is better than just sitting on my ass, he thought and pushed up again.

Soon a sweat began to collect and he paused just long enough to take off the maroon tuxedo jacket and ruffled shirt that he was wearing before he went back to work. He couldn't give a fuck who saw or what they thought.

"Number nine trillion, nine hundred ninety eight billion, three hundred eighty three million, seven hundred fifty thousand, Beetlejuice," the receptionist called out.

"It's about fuckin' time," he muttered and got up from the floor. His skin was shiny with sweat and he had no clue how long he'd been down on the floor doing sit ups and push ups, but it was better than just sitting. At least he did something. He pushed past the receptionist to head down the hallway to see Juno. God I hate that fuckin' bitch, but this time I've got her, he thought and smiled to himself. This time she can't do a goddamn thing to stop me, no matter how hard she tries. He walked past all the ghosts who had to work their entire afterlives behind their desks. What a waste of an afterlife, he thought and sneered as he walked past them.

"Gotta smoke on ya? God knows how long it's been since I've had one," he said and gave Juno a smug smile when he walked in to sit down across from her.

"Five years to be exact," Juno said and handed him a pack of cigarettes.

"Five years? Five fuckin' years you've kept me locked up in that goddamned place?" he snarled at her ready to leap out of his chair and strangle that open neck of hers.

"You're a stupid, stupid man," Juno said and shook her head.

"Watch it Juno, you're lucky that I can't do anything to you, but talk to me like that again and we'll see how far I'll go. You know I ain't one for followin' the rules," he said in a low voice.

Juno smiled at him and let his anger wash over her like it was a summer breeze. She'd been around Beetlejuice enough to know his temper and he didn't intimidate her in the least bit. She watched him as he took out a cigarette and lit it up. He closed his eyes as he took a deep drag and blew the smoke out of his nose.

"I really can't believe you managed to pull it off Beetlejuice," she said and shook her head.

"You're damn right I did now just do what you gotta do and let me get the fuck outta here," Beetlejuice said and blew smoke in her face.

"Hold on a minute, it's not that easy," she said and let a small smile form when she watched him raise an eyebrow.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"You never read the fine print did you?"

"What fine print?"

"The preacher said till death do you part didn't he? Well Beetlejuice, since you are dead that means that lovely little wife you married. You are to reside with Miss Lydia Deetz Juice in her residence until such time as the contract would expire and the contract will expire on her deathbed. When that time comes you are thereby released from your duties as husband and will be able to go about your way," Juno stated.

"And if I just skip it and decide to go about my way anyway?" he asked, one eyebrow raised.

"If you decide to break this agreement, then you forfeit all privileges and are to be deported back here where you belong," Juno said.

No, this couldn't be happening, he thought wildly. Everything began to sink in as he thought of what he had to do and his cigarette hung down from his lips. I'll never be free, never, he thought and felt his stomach sinking and bile rise into his throat.

Juno slid an address across her desk to him and Beetlejuice glanced at it. New York, at least she was in one of his favorite cities. He watched as Juno scribbled her signature on a piece of paper and slid it into a folder.

"Have fun Beetlejuice and I don't expect to see you again," she said and gave a small wave to dismiss him.

Beetlejuice got up and walked out of the office to head toward New York. He never thought in a thousand years that he would have to be with that girl again. Damn, it just kept getting worse and worse. First he lost five years of his life waiting in that damned room and now he'd actually have to be with his...wife? God he never thought he'd say that word. A wife, and not only a wife, but one that he could give a shit less about. She'd been a convenience and now it turned to be a burden.

Beetlejuice narrowed his eyes and smiled. He wondered if little miss Deetz knew about what was in store for her. If he had to be with this little girl then he would. Even if he had to be with her, he was still out of this shit hole and that was better than nothing. Besides, nobody said he had to be faithful, just reside with her and anything was better than where he had been. It's about time to see my wife, he thought and sneered. He wondered briefly what had changed in Miss Lydia Deetz; she had been a slight dark girl with pale skin back then. Wonder if she changed, he thought and shrugged. Not that he cared that much, but he was interested to see her face when he showed back up on her doorstep. It'll be priceless, he thought and started to perk up.

"Ready or not Mrs. Juice, here I come," he said and cackled before he poofed to go see his bride.