Happy tree friends: Tainted souls

by Wolfy wanna bite

This is my First fanfic so be as brutal as possible. Fillip (Flippy) is trained as a hitman by the man who killed his family, Tucker Jones (Truffles) and uses those skills to kill him. Now with nothing left Fillip decides to take up his mentors old position as the Hitman of happy tree. But what will happen if his first mission Is too much for him to handle? FxF, Huminized

2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Hitman of Happy Tree

April 30, 2014

'A man's body was found yesterday in Happy Tree canyon close to the forest. The man is believed to be a former sailor who was hiking in the area, though CSI has yet to find any hiking or camping gear. It is believed this man was murdered and placed here from somewhere else, but without an ID or missing persons report there is no way to identify him. Aside from the ruined sailor uniform police have no information on this mysterious John Doe. Any and all information regarding this man should be reported to the HTPD immediately…'

Fillip's POV

I folded the newspaper and threw it into the trash basket in the corner of my new office. "Heh, they found him a lot faster than I thought they would… Those fuckers are smarter then I gave'em credit for. Maybe I should plant some evidence at the scene." As I walked around my office contemplating how to sabotage the investigation I couldn't help but clean up. Since Tucker made me clean like a maid all the damn time, I guess it's pretty much become a habit. Once the room was clean and all the files were organized I sat in my large swivel chair to continue contemplating.

After an hour of considering every small detail I finally have a solid plan laid out: Step one, I will set up Tucker's old camping tent and supplies close to the edge of the woods with some incriminating evidence of mafia origin (obviously fake documents) to lead the investigation away from Happy Tree. There was a surplus of forged documents in that old bastards files. Step 2, I'll reconnect with some old contacts to lay a foundation for my new business. Third and final step, make enough money to move back to my old Hometown and try to start over… I know with my 'Condition' there is no chance of having a normal life, but I have to try…

The preparations were set, all the most useful contacts agreed to help, the evidence was successfully planted, and any necessary paperwork was either submitted or falsified. The only thing left to do was to make a few contracts and become recognized as a master Hitman. Word was already spreading through the underground about my, now, solo career as an assassin so all I need to do now is sit back and wait.

4 days later

I've spent the last few days gathering basic supplies and necessities and keeping a few close eyes on the ongoing investigation. 'I never thought that bastard could have such loyal and useful helpers' I was doing inventory on my weapons when I heard the phone ring. I hesitated for a moment but decided to answer and spoke as calmly as possible. "Hello?"

"Um, hey. Is this Fillip Orso, the hitman?" He sounded tired and scared. I don't like this so far, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt.

"Yes I am. How may I help you?" I could hear a second voice on his end and I could tell it was a woman. I considered scrapping the phone when he spoke up again.

"My name is… Cuddles. Call me Cuddles. I need you to kill a small group of gangbangers… Would you be able to do it?"

'Is this fucker serious?!' I thought about it for a second and replied in my calm business voice. "Yes it is, but it will cost you a lot more. I would have to gather information and the appropriate supplies which both take time and money. Of course I will also have to meet with you in person for security reasons. You must also bring that young lady with you. Do you accept my terms?" This time he stayed quiet and the young woman spoke up.

"Hello Mr. Orso, you may call me Giggles. My husband Cuddles and I agree to your terms. When and where do we meet?" Her voice was soft but slightly hoarse. I could tell she had been crying a lot. It was obvious they were desperate so I figured I should at least hear them out.

"We can meet at the diner outside of Happy Tree Town at 7pm tonight. I'll hear your story and decide if I will take your request." The young man who calls himself Cuddles spoke up again so it's safe to assume they have their phone on speaker.

"Wait, what do you mean 'tell our story'?! Will you take the job or not?!" I growled loud enough to scare him into silence. 'MOTHERFUCKER! I should slice off his balls and feed'em to him!'

I calmed myself and spoke in a low, menacing voice. "You should realize taking a life and walking away unscathed is difficult enough, but you are asking for a massacre. Most hitmen would've hung up and changed their number, but I am taking the time to listen. This job could cost me my life so you should show some Goddamn respect. I understand you are stressed and in pain so I was trying to be gentle, but don't mistake my kindness with weakness!"

The young woman calling herself Giggles spoke up again "I'm very sorry Mr. Orso. As you said we are very distressed. We will meet you at the scheduled time and explain. Thank you for your courtesy." I sighed 'At least this bitch has manners.' I rubbed my temples and returned to using my business voice "You're welcome. I apologize for lashing out at you. I assure you it will not happen again. I'll meet you at the diner. It's very secluded so we can speak openly. If I choose to accept this job I will require a $3,000 down payment. I apologize if the numbers seem high, but you must remember information and supplies do not come cheaply and this job will require a lot of both."

"We understand. Thank you very much for your time. We will see you soon." The call ends

'This will be my first job (Assuming I accept) and I can already tell it will be a pain in my ass. I walked over to my desk and pulled out my bowie knife 'At least I will get to kill. Muahahahaha!'