Chapter 2: The Day After
Virgil and Scott had stayed at a roadside motel in New Mexico the night before, having driven most of the day. Now they were about to make a mad dash across Texas and Oklahoma before hitting the Kansas state line. Scott was still quiet, not speaking even when Virgil tried to strike up a conversation. Finally, Virgil stopped trying, and thought back to what had happened when he went to pick Scott up.
Virgil pulled up to the gate at Edwards Air Force Base and explained his errand to the sentry on duty. After showing his license and taking the guest pass he pulled through the gate and into the main parking lot. He sat in his car for a moment, composing himself. This was going to be one of the hardest things he's ever done. Not quite as hard as it was to go into that morgue but close. To see his older brother so broken was something he thought he would never experience.
Virgil got out of his car and stretched, he had driven almost six hours the day before, and then another two today. Once he had Scott, there was another seventeen to go. He had thought about getting a plane ticket, but somehow felt that neither of them really wanted to step on a plane right at that moment. He made his way into the main building and looked around. The sentry said they would page Scott to meet him there. There weren't many people around, and Scott was not among them, so he walked up to the reception desk to see if they could page him again.
"Virgil?" A voice called out. It wasn't Scott but Virgil turned toward his name and saw a young blond haired man walking quickly toward him, "You're Virgil right? Scott's brother? I'm Paul Rand, one of his friends."
"Nice to meet you,Yeah, I'm Virgil. Where's Scott?"
"He's in his room. We were hoping a good nights sleep might help, but he's still pretty out of it."
"Damn," Virgil frowned, "Can you take me to him?"
"Of course, this way." Virgil followed Paul through the compound and to the barracks. They arrived at Scott's room to find a small crowd around it. Paul pushed his way through, Virgil close behind. As they got to the door, they could hear an argument from inside.
"I don't care what you say, it is a lie!" It was Scott's voice.
"Scott, you need to get packed." Another voice replied in what was an attempt at patience that was easily wearing out.
"I'm not going anywhere. My father is alive, it was just a nightmare. That's all this is, a nightmare," Scott yelled again.
"Everyone get out of here!" Paul yelled over the voices at those around him as Virgil made his way into the room.
"Scott!" He yelled as he grabbed his brother's shoulders, "Look at me!" Scott paused and allowed himself to be turned to look at his brother.
"Virgil? What are you doing here?" His voice was distant, his eyes unfocused.
"Scott," Virgil sighed and took a deep breath, "I'm here to take you home."
"Why?"
"You know why," Virgil clenched his jaw, "Dad is dead. We have to go bury him."
"No," Scott shook his head and dropped down onto his bed, "He's too young."
"Yes, he was," Virgil agreed as he pulled Scott's head to his stomach. There was a bit of silence as Mark, Paul, and Virgil waited to see what Scott would do next. Slowly Scott started to cry, tears rolled down his cheeks as he muffled his sobs in his brother's side. Virgil wiped his own eyes as they listened to a man who normally was so composed, someone they thought he could handle anything, completely crumble in his brother's arms. Mark and Paul excused themselves to give the brothers some privacy and Virgil sat down on the bed next Scott.
"Virgil, I have to go ID…"
"It's been done. I just came from LA."
"But, I said I…"
"It's been taken care of," Virgil repeated, "They're both being sent to Kansas. We'll need to get going as well, it's a long drive."
"I'm… I'm not ready," Scott stood up and wiped his eyes as he reached for the clothes he had previously thrown on the floor. Virgil helped and soon Scott's bags were packed. Scott was just zipping the bag up when there was a knock on the door.
"Sorry to barge in," It was Captain Barns, "I just wanted to check on Scott."
"I'm okay, Captain," Scott rubbed at his eyes again in embarrassment.
"I'm glad to hear it. Virgil is it? We talked on the phone."
"Oh yes, a pleasure to meet you," Virgil took the offered hand and shook it.
"I'm sorry you had to come all the way out here."
"No, it was no trouble. It'll be nice to have company on the drive home."
"You aren't flying?" The Captain asked a little surprised.
"I'm not sure I want to fly at the moment," Virgil frowned, "Is there anything Scott needs to do before we leave?"
"I understand," The Captain nodded, "Yes, actually he needs to go see Major Simms and confirm how long his leave is for."
"I'm not sure," Scott frowned, "What do you think Virgil?" Virgil looked from Scott to the Captain not used to having questions referred to him by his older brother.
"Why don't we all take the walk up to his office. You can discuss it on the way," The Captain suggested. Scott nodded and led the way out of his room.
Virgil followed next to the Captain keeping his eye on his brother's back, "I was shocked when you first told me how he was reacting," Virgil sighed as he rubbed his eyes,"But after thinking about the last time. We were quite young, but I think he reacted to Mom's death in about the same way."
"How young were you?"
"I was seven, Scott eight," Virgil replied, "I remember crying from the moment Dad told us. Gordon and Alan, the two youngest, they were only three and four. They didn't understand, but John and I, we knew, and they knew we were upset. Dad had tried to comfort us a bit, but he was still in shock as well and I remember John and I holding on to Gordon and Alan and just crying. Scott was quiet, stayed to himself for several days. Then, as if a switch had been flipped he came over to us and started to comfort us. Telling us everything would be okay. I don't ever remember seeing him cry, he just stood straight, held onto us younger ones and said that everything would be okay."
"I see," The Captain mused as they continued to follow Scott, "So you think once the funeral is over he'll snap out of it?"
"Once we get home, there will be things to be taken care of… people to take care of, he'll snap out of it. I hope." They had arrived at the Major's office, and were led inside. Virgil had tried to stay in the outer room with the secretary, but Scott pulled him in. The Major looked at Scott and the Captain with a raised eyebrow and Virgil could see the Captain give a slight shrug.
"Captain, Lieutenant, and who is this?"
"Major," Scott saluted, "This is my brother, Virgil."
"Pleasure to meet you," The Major nodded to Virgil who nodded back, "I take it you came to collect your brother."
"Yes, sir," Virgil nodded, not sure how to address the man.
"And how long do you think you'll need to get things settled Lieutenant," The Major asked turning back to Scott.
"I'm not sure," Scott replied looking over at Virgil who jumped a little at being referred to again.
"I see," The Major nodded seeing what the situation was. Scott was still shaken up, though he knew the Lieutenant to be of sound mind and had passed cool under pressure, but everyone had their weak point, and for this man it was obviously his family, "Virgil was it? What all still needs to be done?"
"Oh, well, I've arranged for the bodies to be shipped back to Kansas, but that's all I've done so far. We need to figure out funeral arrangements and well, Dad's stuff," Virgil frowned thinking of all the things they needed deal with.
"Well, I'm sure you'll have lawyers to help you with that," The Major nodded, "I'll put down two weeks, I hope that will be enough."
"Yes, sir, that should be plenty," Virgil nodded looking over at Scott who had faded out again, "Right Scott?"
"Yes, Sir," Scott saluted not really knowing what was going on, both the Major and Captain frowned.
"You listen to me Lieutenant," the Major announced standing up and leaning over his desk making sure Scott was paying attention, "You need to get yourself straighten out, or else you'll be grounded for good. Do you understand?"
"Yes, sir," Scott frowned taking in a deep breath and nodded. They left the office after that, and the Captain also said his good-byes.
Virgil and Scott returned to Scott's room to grab his things and left, saying goodbye to his friends as they passed them in the hall.
Virgil had hoped having his brother along would make the trip faster, but that had not happened. He looked over at Scott as they passed the state line into Kansas, he wasn't sure what to do for him, or if just letting him be was what was best.
Alan was the first to arrive at the ranch. He had left the race track as soon as the medic said he was clear. He had had a few bumps and bruises but was otherwise okay. He made his way back to his dorms, alerted the school of his situation and left. It was a five hour drive and he arrived late that night. The house was empty, which gave Alan the creeps. When all his brother's were still in school, there was always someone at home, even between all their extracurricular activities. However, as each one graduated and went on with their lives the house became quieter and quieter. By the time Gordon had left for the Submarine Service it was just Alan and Grandma Tracy, his father not being around much. The house was a very lonely place during his Senior year in high school, and he tended to spend more time than was necessary out on the race track to keep busy. Then once Alan had moved out to go to school, Grandma Tracy decided to move back to her own home that she had kept in California. Now the house sat silent and looming to the youngest Tracy, no one had been there for a long time he could tell. His father officially still called it home, but was gone on business so much the he was away more often than he was there. He had to correct himself, his father did call it home, but it wasn't anymore. He wondered what would happen to the old house. The land around it had been slowly sold off to their neighbors when his father had been too busy to deal with maintaining it. So now it was just a few acres and the house itself, but it would always be the ranch to the boys.
Alan went around the house and turned on all of the lights. It was a waste of electricity but it helped to dispel the feeling of loneliness about the place. He then went to the kitchen to see if there was anything left there to eat. The refrigerator was empty, and the pantry had only a few cans of beans and vegetables left. It had been a long anxious drive and he didn't really feel like making the two hour round trip to town to get food. Instead he decided to drag a blanket and pillow from his room and sat in front of the TV in the lounge watching re-runs of old twentieth century shows.
Alan woke late the next morning, still curled up in the chair in the lounge. He stretched and groaned. His little accident the previous day, while wasn't serious, had wore him out and his choice of bed hadn't helped. It was almost noon, and he had to get into town to do some shopping, and to pick up Grandma Tracy at the airport. He had no clue when any of his other brother's would show up, but he hoped it would be soon. He took a quick shower, noticing that there was no soap or shampoo, something else that needed bought, and dried off quickly. He checked the bathrooms, and bedrooms to see if there were any other necessities that were needed before jumping back into his car and taking off for town.
The closest town was a small one, just big enough for a few stores of necessity, a bank, and post office. Alan made his way to the small airport on the outskirts. Normally a small town like this one wouldn't have considered maintaining a runway, but Jeff Tracy had argued the necessity for a place emergency planes and helicopters could land. It also helped that Jeff was willing to help fund the airport. Of course he wanted to use it for his own purposes as well. Having an hour drive home after landing was much better than a three hour one. Jeff used it often when the boys were young, trying to be home as much as possible. The boys used it on occasion when they were in their late teens to make quick trips to one of the bigger cities for a fun night out, or art exhibition in Virgil's case.
Alan pulled into the drive and past the guard post that never had anyone on duty. The airport had a large fence around the property itself, the gate remaining closed unless you knew the code to get in. Alan punched in the code and drove up to the main building, nothing more than a small shack near the center of the runway. There were a few small hangers off to the side, two of which the Tracy's owned, and a fuel tank on the far side of the runway. Alan punched in the code for the door and entered the main building, making himself at home behind the radio console. They didn't have anyone on staff that stayed at the airport. If you wanted to use the runway, you either had to call ahead so someone could be sent out (The Tracy's sometimes volunteered for that duty), or know someone who was a licensed controller (All of the Tracy's were). So Alan turned on the radio and fiddled with the dials as he pulled on the headset. Virgil had called him during his drive the previous night, his Grandma was scheduled to take a commercial flight from California that morning, and then Virgil said he had arranged for a private plane to bring her there. Still if everything was on time, he should be hearing from the incoming plane soon.
He sat there, playing with a pencil that had been left by the last person to use the airfield when the call finally came in.
'Utica UNICOM, Cessna 485EF requests the active.'
'Active at Utica is three-two,' Alan jumped in his seat giving the pilot the heading of the runway.
'Utica traffic, Cessna 5EF, eight miles southeast, will overfly the field at two thousand feet for a left downwind entry to runway three-two, Utica.'
Alan relaxed again, they were still a bit away, but they would be here soon. He just had to wait on more contact from the plane.
'Utica traffic, Cessna 5EF is one mile to the west, to enter the left downwind for runway three-two, Utica.'
Alan sat up straighter, and looked out the small window above the radio. He could see the plane starting its decent.
'Utica traffic, Cessna 5EF, on final for runway three-two, full stop, Utica.'
'Cessna 5EF, affirmative, runway is clear.'
'Affirmative, Cessna 5EF.' Alan watched as the plane slowly touched down, the wheels screeching a little on landing. He waited, knowing that he wasn't quite done. 'Utica traffic, Cessna 5EF is clear of the active, Utica' Once the pilot had finished his announcement Alan was out the door and waiting for the plane to taxi to the building. It rumbled to a stop as the pilot door swung open and the man behind the stick jumped out.
"You Alan Tracy," He asked yelling loud enough to be heard over the dying engines.
"Yeah, how's your cargo?"
"Talkative," He smiled as he led the way safely around the plane, "Sorry to hear about your dad."
"Yeah," Alan nodded, not really wanting to get into casual conversation about that yet. The pilot pulled open the passenger door and held out his hand. Grandma Tracy was scooting out of her seat and found the first foothold. She took two steps down, and the pilot took her by the waist and lifted her the rest of the way down.
"Alan," She exclaimed once firmly on the ground. Alan moved forward and encased his grandmother in a hug. She returned it tightening her hold on him as if making sure that he at least was still here. The pilot left the two and went to the cargo hold to extract her luggage.
"How was your flight," Alan asked as he took her back around the plane and into the main terminal.
"Tiring. I couldn't sleep at all last night, I was so worried about you all."
"We're fine, and we'll all be together again shortly… well, most of us," Alan frowned.
"Gordon won't be able to come?"
"I doubt it," Alan shook his head.
"Oh dear."
"Wait here for a bit. I need to go refuel the plane and make sure he makes it out again. Then we can stop by the store and then go home."
"Is there nothing at the house?"
"A can of beans, and two cans of asparagus," Alan grimaced.
"Yes, the store it is then," Grandma nodded. Alan left his Grandma in the terminal and rode with the pilot to the fuel tanks. They stood and chatted for a bit, the pilot was polite keeping the conversation away from family matters. Once the plane was fueled up, Alan returned to the radio and put the headset on.
'Utica traffic, Cessna 5EF is ready for takeoff.'
'Cessna 5EF, cleared takeoff runway three-two. Have a safe trip,' Alan replied keeping his eye on the small plane.
'Affirmative, Cessna 5EF.' The plane sped up and took up into the air, disappearing into the distance.
"Alright, Grandma. Let's get going," Alan turned the radio off and strode over and picked up her bags, two old leather suitcases she's had for as long as he remembered. He loaded them up into his car and then opened the door for her. Once she was settled he got in himself and took off.
They arrived at the store minutes later, Alan grabbed one of the big carts and had it ready for his grandmother to push. They walked down the small isles, his grandmother calling out items as they passed and Alan obediently put them in the cart. They made it through to the checkout as people watched them, their eyes wide, but none brave enough to ask why they were back in town. Small towns, equal huge rumor mills. Alan knew it would only take time before someone asked, and he would be forced to tell them. Then the word would spread like wildfire. They checked out, the clerk he had known since he was little, but they just smiled and welcomed them home. Yes, the people of the small town were nosey, but they were polite about it as well. They wouldn't ask until the gossip had made it around. That however, did remind Alan of something else that needed to be done. He loaded the groceries and his Grandma into the car and then jogged across the street to city hall.
City Hall was small, and usually only had one person in it at any time, the secretary. She took care of all the minor, daily issues, and relayed anything more to the mayor who was usually out taking care of his own farm.
"Why isn't it Alan Tracy. What are you doing back in town," She asked a broad smile on her face which faded when she got a good look at his own expression, "Oh no, what's happened? One of your brothers? Is it Scott," She asked always having had a fondness for the eldest.
"No, Scott's fine. I just wanted to let you know that you may need to get someone at the airport by the end of the week, maybe next week as well, as consistently as possible."
"Why's that? I can tell by your face young man that something is wrong. You better just tell me and get it over with," She had stood up and walked around the desk keeping her eyes on him. Alan took a deep breath and looked up at her,
"Dad's dead. Yesterday in an plane crash."
"No," The secretary gasped and shook her head, "No… are you sure?"
"Virgil saw the body," Alan nodded looking away again knowing that if he kept looking at her shocked and sad eyes he would cry again.
"Oh, Alan," She exclaimed as she pulled him into a hug. She pulled herself away grabbing a tissue from her desk and dabbing at her eyes, "I'll call Shep Miller, see if one of his boys will be able to man the radio. Have you arranged for the funeral yet?"
"No, I'm the first one home. I just picked up Grandma from the airport and got some groceries."
"Alright, well if you boys need anything you know the phone number. I'd be more than happy to help out."
"Thanks, I'll let them know," Alan nodded and then made his way back out and flopped back down in the car.
"It had to be done," Grandma nodded laying her hand on his arm, "Best the town hears it from one of us than from the news factories."
"I know," Alan nodded, "Will it get any easier talking about it? I feel like every time I have to say it, I'm about to choke."
"That's hard to say. Sometimes I can talk about your grandfather and mother and be filled with warm memories and love, other times, I just can't get their names out."
"Oh," Alan sighed tightening his hand on the steering wheel.
"But that doesn't mean you shouldn't talk. Holding it in makes it worse," Grandma Tracy sighed and turned to look out the window, "I just hope Scott is taking this better than when your mother died."
"Scott," Alan asked as he started up the car and pulled out of the small parking lot to head home, "From what the other's said, Scott was everything to us after mom died. Tried to fill in for her in a way."
"He did," Grandma Tracy agreed but then shook her head, "But it took a week after the funeral before he became that way. Before that he had… well, locked everything inside him. He didn't cry, didn't grieve, just sat wherever we put him and stayed there frozen as if nobody was home. At meals he would eat maybe two bites, and then excuse himself. I was quite worried about him."
"What changed?"
"Let me think, yes, that was it," Grandma Tracy looked over at Alan and smiled, "You took your mother's death in stride. Of course, you were too young to really understand what had happened. Occasionally you would ask where your mother was, but then you were off running and playing again in no time. One day, just about a month after the funeral, you and Gordon were running around outside. Scott was sitting at the window, it looked as if he was staring off into space. You had tripped and fallen in the gravel and scrapped your knee. You started crying your head off as if your leg had just been cut in two, Gordon didn't know what to do so he started crying as well. I was nearby, doing some knitting when I heard the noise and went to stand up, but stopped. Scott's face had changed. He was looking out the window still, but he was looking at you two now, crying your heads off in the middle of the driveway. And then he was gone, out the door and in the driveway next to you. I walked over to the window and watched. He picked you up and set you in his lap looking at the scrapped knee and murmuring to you as he rocked you slightly. He then reached out and waved for Gordon to come over and pulled him in as well, hugging you both still murmuring to you two. You quieted down and he carried you into the house. Walked right past me and set you on the counter getting the first aid kit and tending to your knee. Gordon was right next to him holding onto his shirt. I stayed out of the way and watched.
"Soon your knee was fixed, your tears dried and you both went running outside to play again. Scott looked around, right past me again, and went upstairs. I followed quietly and watched. He went to Virgil's room and knocked. There was no answer so he opened the door. I could hear Virgil yelling at him to get out, but Scott wouldn't listen to him. I snuck up and stood outside the door. Scott had sat down on the bed near Virgil. He had been sketching in a notebook and looked put out that his brother had burst his way in. Scott just laid a hand on his shoulder and apologized. Said he was sorry and that he wouldn't isolate them any more. It was silent for a while, I could't see into the room well, but then I could hear the two brothers move, and peered in to see them hugging. Virgil crying again. He stayed there for a good while and I was about to leave, when he kissed Virgil on the head and walked out. This time he looked right up at me and smiled. He then went straight into John's room, without even knocking. I followed, we both knew John wasn't in there, but up on the roof. Scott climbed out onto the tree outside his window and climbed up. I sat at the window, I could barely hear their conversation, but it was about the same as what he had told Virgil. After a little bit, Scott came back down and into John's room. He then looked at me and smiled, told me he was good now, so were his brothers, and that he would help take care of them."
"Wow," Alan mumbled in shock, "Scott's always been so cool and collected, I would have never thought…"
"Yes, he changed after that day. Before, while he loved you all, you were more of a nuisance to him. Kids that were always getting in the way. After that, you were his world." Alan concentrated on the road ahead of him. He hadn't really thought about his mother's death. Like his grandam said, he was too young to understand, let alone remember. But he was old enough now, and it was killing him. He couldn't imagine the way his older siblings had felt back then, or how they had dealt with it. And now they had to go through it a second time.
They pulled into the drive and found another car already there. Scott was standing outside of the car, staring blankly at the house before him as Virgil pulled a bag from the trunk. He stopped as Alan approached and came up to the car as they came to a stop.
"Oh, good, you brought food," Virgil smiled when saw the bags in the back seat.
"Have you talked to John," Alan asked as he pulled a bag out and handed it to Virgil.
"He just called me about an hour ago. He'll be able to come up for the funeral, but that's it. They're on a tight schedule."
"You mean he's still going into space?"
"If he can, yeah," Virgil grabbed bags and followed Alan into the house.
"Why?"
"You know why," Virgil sighed, "Chances like this don't come along often. If he doesn't take this one, it could be another couple of years before he is asked again."
"I know but…"
"Dad wouldn't want him to cancel. You know that."
"I know, but I want him here," Alan whined a little.
"It's not like when we were kids, Alan. We can't just retreat from the world for a few months to heal. We have to keep going on." Virgil set the bags down and turned to retrieve more from the car.
"What about Scott," Alan asked looking out of the window to his brother who still stood in front of the house frozen.
"I don't know," Virgil frowned following Alan's gaze. Alan watched his brother for a little. Their grandma had walked up to him and laid a hand on his arm, but he didn't seem to notice. She hung her head and looked to the house with a frown. Alan walked out of the door, and up to Scott. He stood just a foot away and looked up into his brother's face. There was no emotion on his face, but he could see the sadness in his eyes, and the disbelief of what had happened. Alan needed his brothers to get him through this, he knew that. But he also realized that his brothers needed him too. He took a step closer and wrapped his arms around Scott's torso, clinging to him tightly.
"Scott, what are we going to do," Alan asked, muffled in Scott's t-shirt. Slowly, Scott looked down at the blond head and raised his arms, wrapping them around his brother. He pulled him in tighter, his eyes clearing, tears falling down into the blond locks. He lowered his head and buried his face into Alan's hair,
"We mourn him. We remember him. We keep going on."
"I'm not sure I can," Alan replied wiping his own tears on Scott's shirt.
"You can, you will, but you won't be alone. We'll all be here. We'll help each other."
"Like we did before," Virgil added walking over to the two and pulling them into a hug of his own. Scott reached out and wrapped his arms around Virgil encasing Alan between them, whispering a thank you in his ear. Virgil just smiled, "Anything for my brothers." They stood there, silently for some time, Grandma looking on, before Alan decided to break the moment.
"Uh, guys… I can't quite breath in here." The two eldest broke the bond laughing at their youngest brother, "And you both could use a shower, phew."
"Yeah, a seventeen hour car trip will do that," Virgil laughed as he smelled his shirt.
"Good thing I remembered the soap," Alan smiled wiping his eyes again.
"Come on, let's get these things inside," Scott announced as he walked over to Grandma Tracy and gave her a hug.
"Yes, you all need a good meal I imagine," She announced waving Virgil over for his own hug, "After you all take showers of course." They laughed and the house, that was so creepy and intimidating to Alan the previous night had suddenly warmed up and was welcoming again.