Author's note:okay,so I've been doing research on ptsd (post traumatic stress disorder),and it's a theme in this story .why? i figure if anybody saw some of that shit from starfox 64 for real,you would be sufficiently scarred for life .here's my take on that .
Lost Soul
One of the things Wolf absolutely loved about Angel House was that the seventh and eighth floors went unused because of an accident .Wolf put this to use and dragged Fox up to the seventh floor,left him in one of the rooms,specifically room 707 .Why?
It was right above his own room,and there was a secret entrance in his closet he could climb to get there .It was perfect .Wolf chose Angel House specifically because the strange passageways would make for easy escape from law enforcement an enemies .He heard legends of the place,but this is beyond what he could imagine
Right now though,Wolf was down in Fox's room,getting rid of all evidence that Fox ever came to Papetoon .Thing is,as much as he tried,he didn't think he could murder Fox McCloud .
'Because he looks like James' .Wolf thought .
And he did,so much,so much that Wolf was sickened by it .In Wolf's eyes,genetics was one sick bitch,for something like this to have even happened .
"I bet their fuckin' dicks are the same size",he mumbled sarcastically as he walked through Fox's room .The first thing he noticed was that the place was messy,clear sign of madness .Add that to the scratches on the walls and other furniture ,along with all those burnt out cigarettes,a half filled bottle of cheap whiskey and strewn about clothes . . .
A bottle of pain pills on the dresser .
Next to it,a blaster,bits of red gold fur at the nose of it .It was the same shade as Fox's fur .
"You fucking madman",Wolf said to himself .
This came from looking at the broken mirror in the bathroom .
Slowly,Wolf opened the mirror with a gloved finger .
More pills in the cabinet .
Sleep pills,pain pills,anxiety pills,anti-depresants . .
And some were empty .
In bold black marker,the words 'LOST' was written .It was obvious that it was very old,but Fox probably looked at it and took it to heart .Wolf sighed .
'Great,anti-depressants and anxiety pills? Guess he really is unhinged',Wolf thought .Though he would confess,Fox seemed perfectly normal every time he saw him .
Wolf dug around for a plastic bag and after finding one,threw the pill bottles in there,before continuing through the apartment .Wolf now took his eye patch off and put both his good eye and cybernetic one to use,so it'd be easier to see in open spaces .One thing Andross did do for him was give him means to see,though it was half-ass at best .
As he went through the place he found hidden a bag of pain pills (half empty) hidden under the mattress .This concerned Wolf who took the next step; he went through his luggage,his trash .By the time he was done,he was certain what was going on .
The most interesting thing he found,was an old photo album .Wolf sat down on the beat down bed and looked through it .
There were pictures of all Fox's friends,and the bits of orange fur on it said that it was recently used .As he flipped through,he looked at pictures of Fox as a baby,fox as a kid,his friends too .The looked so happy . . . .not like the man who tried and failed to murder Wolf the night before .
Wolf felt so many things now,envy being one of them .He left all his child-hood friends behind,his family too .And the shame of what he had become instead of what he and everyone else thought he was gonna be,still plagued him .Fox had the life Wolf was suppose to have,this was suppose to be his .And here Fox was,making a mess of it,throwing it away,fucking it up .Wolf only felt rage,as he flipped the page .
He calmed when he saw the picture .It was James,sitting on his arwing smiling back at him .Wolf smiled back at him,staring .He pulled his glove off with his teeth,let his bare fingers gloss over the image .He quickly took the picture and stashed it away .
Wolf now knew what he had to do .
Wolf came back to room 707,plastic bag in one hand,the photo album tucked under the other .Over his shoulder ,his shoulder was what appeared to be a belt .He shut the door quietly and locked it manually (There was no security up here,and little electricity ,most of the lights didn't work) .Fox sat in the middle of the room,the only light in the room,a ceiling fan,cast dimly over him ,as if he was in a spotlight .Through crushed glass,and creaked floors,Fox looked up and saw Wolf .His eyes though,were focused on the belt on his shoulder .
"You're a lost soul,Fox .I thought I was fucked,but you need every gotdamn deity in the universe .Tell me . . .what the fuck is this?",Wolf asked,throwing the plastic bag at Fox's face .
"What the hell were you doing in my room?!",he demanded .
"I wanted to find out more about The Hero of Lylat .You should be grateful,cuz I was gonna kill you to get you out of my fur .But I don't think you're ready to die yet,McCloud .At least,I won't let you,not on my watch .Don't make me change my mind",Wolf said .
"Thought you wanted my head,why the change of heart?",Fox asked .
"I only ever killed to protect myself or others .I bet you didn't know that,did you?",Wolf said .
"Who the hell are you to tell me-"
"I'm as much of a man as you think you are,McCloud .Look at me,look through your mirror .You were everything I was suppose to be .I'm you if everything that went right,went wrong .You see McCloud,this thing we got goin' here? For me,it's personal .Very .Very .Personal",Wolf said .His fingers brushed over the ring in his pocket again .
Fox said nothing .
"The Hero of Lylat's suppose to be living life on his own terms,not being a psychopathic junkie",Wolf sneered .
"I don't need this-"
"On the contrary,this is exactly what you need",Wolf said .
"I only take it for pain",Fox said softly .
"Which pain are you tryna get rid of? The one in you body,the head,or the pain in your heart?",Wolf said .
"What the fuck do you want already?",Fox demanded .
"To fix you .I'm going to fix you ,Fox McCloud .I'm going to give you absolution,whether you want it,or not",Wolf said .
"Who the fuck are you to be passing judgement?After the shit that you've done",Fox ground out .
"Everything I did and I do is for survival,and to better myself as a person .You don't have that problem .You do shit to seek validation and punishment ",Wolf said calmly,leaning against the wall .Fox swallowed and pulled at his restraints .
"You can't keep me here!",Fox shouted .
"Yes I can,toy soldier .Nobody gives a fuck about you except your friends and they're all gone now,aren't they?",Wolf said .
"I've been looking through this here photo album .You've got good friends,good people around you .So tell me . . .what the fuck is your problem",Wolf said .
"You're the one with the problem,you twisted bastard! You fucking kidnapped me,tied me up in a beat down fucking room somewhere!And I have a problem?!",Fox said .Wolf paused,then laughed .
"Okay,so my methods are kinda harsh,so what? You were trying to kill me ",Wolf pointed out .
"With good reason",Fox said .Wolf shook his head .
"Keep thinking that and you'll be here longer .I'll only keep you restrained as long as you're a threat to me .And until you understand,you're a threat .But I'm not a complete son of a bitch . . .when was the last time you've eaten,drank or used the bathroom? I'm gonna bet you'd let your own bladder burst and kill you before you let me catch you pissing yourself",Wolf said .
"I'm fine .Don't touch me",Fox said .
"You're a bad liar .I've been watching you move your legs,tryna hold it for the past ten minutes"Wolf said flatly .Fox just glared and turned away,sighing .
"How can I piss,with my hands tied",Fox said annoyed .Wolf walked over to Fox and kneeled behind him .He clamped a set of bracelets on at his forearms and untied the scarf from his wrists .Fox couldn't believe Wolf was this foolish as to let him go .He tried to work out escape routes,but he really,really needed to piss .Suddenly,his arms began to tremble,and the bracelets slid down his wrists .Instantly,his arms came together and the bracelets hooked together .Fox stared down,shocked .
"You didn't really think I was that stupid,did you?",Wolf said a smirk on his face .Wolf came over to Fox and put a collar over his neck .
"What the hell?!",Fox said .
"I'm tryna give you some dignity here .The bathroom's this way",Wolf said .He undid the buckles the heald Fox at the ankles .Before he could do anything,Wolf jerked him up from the chair and practically dragged him to the bathroom .Wolf let the long leash unroll ,sent him in and locked the door .Fox frowned; a longer leash would be harder to escape .
As soon as Wolf shut the door,Fox relieved himself and it felt damn good .While he was at it though,he started tearing at the collar with his teeth .As he did this looked around the bathroom quickly memorizing it .It was beat down and looked dingy ,but not biohazard filthy .He looked around for something,anything he could use to his advantage .Suddenly,Wolf slammed on the door .
"I don't take that fucking long to piss! Get out or I'm dragging you out,I don't care if your dick's still out!",Wolf said,startling him .
"Go to hell!",Fox yelled back .
"I'm gonna get out of here and I'm gonna kill you",Fox ground out .Wolf continued jerking Fox by the leash .A sadistic grin spread to Wolf's face and he jerked the leash so hard,Fox fell forward and hit the floor .
"You really need to learn to shut the fuck up sometimes .I'm not interrogating you,I'm interviewing you . So anything you have to say is only vaguely relevant to me unless I decide that it's going to help you . Usually,I'm just gonna get mad,which you won't like ",Wolf said .
"I've been through worse than this . . .you can't torture me",Fox said again .Wolf simply went over to him,hauled him up by the shoulders and sat him back in the chair,leaving the magnetic cuffs on .
"Have you ever experienced 'psychological warfare' up close and personal? I don't think you have",Wolf said .
"What I've got in store for you,there is no cyanide pill .You have to take it",Wolf ground out,snatching Fox by his muzzle .Fox thrashed around,trying to push Wolf away,but Wolf had and iron grip on his face and forced him to stare into that one eye .Wolf finally released him and backhanded him so hard his body twisted partly to the side .
"Don't make this worse than it has to be ,McCloud",Wolf said .With that,he dug into his pocket and withdrew a crushed up muffin an forced it into Fox's face .
"Eat",he said .Fox just looked back defiantly .Wolf just smirked at him .He literally forced a knife between Fox's teeth and bent it,making Fox open his jaw .He forced fed him the muffin ,stuffing anything that fell out,back into his mouth .Fox hadn't felt this humiliated since the war,when he was forced to eat from the floor like a wild animal .
When he was done,he took Fox's scarf and tied it around his mouth so as to muffle his voice .He threw one last glance at Fox before he shut out the light and left his room,leaving Fox alone with his thoughts .
Wolf was wandering down the empty halls of the seventh floor of 'Angel House' ,a communicator in hand .It wasn't his,but Fox's .It went off so many times since he had it and he could immediately see that before he got his hands on it,Fox hadn't even been answering the thing .
10 messages from Peppy Hare
12 messages from Slippy Toad
20 messages from Falco Lombardi
9 messages from General Pepper
16 messages from Bill Gray
2 messages from Lucy Hare
4 message from Samus Aran
'Who the hell was that?',Wolf thought .He was sure he heard the name somewhere but couldn't place it .
He decided that he would listen to Lucy's ,check her texts to .
"I'm sorry for what happened last night ,Fox .But you need to stop this shit .I know what Peppy said,I know what I'm doing .It's just that Jimmy's a cool guy and he's a pilot like us and . . .it's been hard lately .You know we lost a lot of wingmates,kindred soul,you know? I think if you get to know him better,you'll get along .And even if it doesn't work out between me and him,we could all be best friends,you know? Maybe he could join Star Fox or something,if he's good enough .Or he can fly with the 'SkyForce' with Fay,Miyu,Cool * and I .He'll be glad to not be the only guy anymore . . .anyway,we need to talk Fox",Lucy's voice said .The first message ended and Wolf played the next .
"Fox,I'm worried about you .Falco says you're not answering him and stuff again .If you don't pick up the next time I call,I'm coming over!",Lucy said .The second message ended .
"Looks like I have to work fast then",Wolf said to himself .But first,he needed a nap .He went into room 706,right across from where Fox was held .Once in,he went to the bedroom closet and shut the door behind him .He dropped down to the floor,and felt around the carpeted floor for hinges .He dropped lifted the floor and dropped climbed down to the closet below,ending up in Fox's room .
Being too lazy to go to his own room,he fell asleep in Fox's .
Wolf was barely conscious when he was strapped down to an operating table .There were three masked men,a crocodile an owl and a salamander .He was recovering from a recent crash of his Wolfen and was bleeding out .
"We're low on anesthetic,what now?",the masked owl said .
"Survey the damage first,we might not need it",the crocodile answered .
"His limbs,theres glass and pieces of metal,should we take off his arm?",the salamander asked said .Wolf tensed at that and tried to sit up .
"Hold still,damnit! You're still bleeding out!",the owl said and slammed him back on the table .
"Why's your eye closed,can you open it?",the salamander asked .Wolf opened his eye,revealing visible damage from the eye .
"Fuck,that looks bad kid,can you see?",the owl asked .
"It's blurry:,Wolf mumbled .He was exhausted from loss of blood .
"Listen,he might go blind,we'll just get rid of the eye and get the shrapnel out",the crocodile responded .
"Wait! Can't I get a new one?!",Wolf said .
"The infection will spread,do you wanna die?" owl asked sternly .
"Just put him under already",a salamander said .
"They gave all the stuff to the people losing limbs,we gotta do without",the owl said .
"No! No! I can wait it out",Wolf begged .
"Wait for what? The Cornerian Defense Force stopped our supplies on Macbeth! There is nothing to wait for .Wolf was hyperventilating now,as someone pulled back the lid of his eye .Wolf forced his eye shut fearfully .
"Hurry up! I need help with this stuff here,it doesn't smell too good!",the salamander said .He shaved the fur from Wolf's right arm .
"Fine,but let's get this over with,we're getting this eye",the owl said .
As much as Wolf thrashed and screamed,his muzzle was held by a cold,gloved hand .Wolf fought as hard as he could ,but he was too weak from blood loss .
"Shit! I accidentally ! The glass was in an artery,he's bleeding too fast!",the salamander said,after having yanked alarge piece of glass from Wolf's arm .He screamed in agony and horror as his blood started covering the table and spilling on the floor .
"Stop it,or he'll go into shock! We need a transfusion!",a voice said,but Wolf didn't know who .All he felt was the woozziness and the agony of someone tampering with his eye .He let out a blood curdling scream ,his whole body writhing .
"Damnit! He's gonna die!Don't waste anymore rags on him!'
"He's a fucking pilot!He's valuable!"
"With one eye,he's useless!"
"You dumbass! He's going into shock now!"
"Let him die then!"
"Speed up the process,they said some guy got stabbed in the chest!"
"Let em' both die,it's too late! And stop fucking with that eye!"
"It's hanging out now,we have to"
After struggling ,immobilized as the horror took place in his mind,Wolf woke up and let out a soundless scream .He threw the covers off the bed and scrambled up immediately .Clutching himself,he looked around the darkness
With a single eye .
Wolf reached up and touched the scarred,cybernetic eye on the other side of his face,his heart still pounding in his chest .A glimpse in the full body mirror ,half obscured with sheets,and he could see the false eye,glowing brighter than the other .Suddenly,he felt horribly depressed,disgusted with himself ,he lay on his side .
'I'm not useless! I can still do things,I can,fly,I can! I'm not defective!I'll show them,I'm just as good,just as good as anyone else! Show you I'm better! I'll be better!'
Done with his self pity,Wolf pushed himself out of the bed .He snatched up his blaster and dug around for something to write on .He settled with a card board box and drew a target on it .
It was windy and cold and Wolf only had on a tank top and cargo pants,but he didn't care .He took a knife and dug it into the target,tacking it to the wooden door .
'I'm not useless . .I'm not useless . . .I'm not useless'
Wolf Chanted the mantra in his head as he started taking several steps back,aiming his gun at the target .Still,it was somewhat difficult to get it right ,with the lack of depth perception .His implant did nothing to help,only distracted him .Wolf felt it first hand as he started shooting at the target .
And he missed pitifully .
"Ugh! I can do this! I'm not useless,I'm not useless",he yelled into the night .
Frustrated,Wolf tilted his bandana over his mechanical eye,giving him only one to work with .
Immediately,he fired a shot and it hit the target,but no where near the center .He didn't know to be happy or angry,but he fired again,and again,and again .Each time,he got closer,he literally felt a weight being lifted from his shoulders .His tail wagged now,he had a grin plastered on his face .He continued shooting well into the night .
Wolf's shooting did nothing to help Fox at all, in fact,it made it worse .Fox couldn't sleep now,the sounds of blasters keeping him on constant alert,making him afraid to sleep .He was so shook up ,that the sounds of Venomian soldiers walking around was coming to his ears .From his room,he could see the shadows cast on his walls from cars driving by .But they looked like the metal grates,they looked like the bars of cells and Fox was trapped within .
Suddenly,Fox fought violently at his restraints,tried to force himself free .But it was no use,no use at all .And he was forced to watch the haunting shadowplay on the walls,the sounds of death in his ears .