Author's Note: When I reposted this, to save messing you about too much, I lumped the prologue and first chapter into one part. I've reintroduced the split where it was intended. Next (new) update will be posted straight after.

Two

Caught off-guard by the interjection, Mercedes stared at the older woman who had spoken up from her stool at the quietest corner of the bar and took in the fading looks of the croweater. Whoever she was, she'd obviously put a good few miles on the clock over the years. Considering how little the deep, weather-beaten tan did for the lines around the woman's dark eyes, she shook her head with a sneer she knew was condescending, but hell if she cared. This broad – with a body that might once have been something, but was now definitely ... lived-in, to be generous about it - might have been around longer than most, but it evidently hadn't been to her advantage.

"Fairytales, please," she scoffed. "Even I'm too old for that bullshit and I got thirty years on you, easy."

But, while the woman's eyes hardened, she simply smiled and lazily twirled the stirrer in her gin and tonic. "You, little girl, need to open those pretty eyes and take a long, hard look at the real world."

"Excuse me? Says the bitch harping on about dumbass fairytales in an MC clubhouse! And hang on a minute, 'cause I don't seem to recall asking for your opinion in the first place."

"Pity," came the cool response. "Because if you at least had the sense to realise you maybe don't got all the answers, you'd be saving yourself a whole heap of wasted effort. Swanning round here, thinking you're gonna bag yourself a Son when the truth of it should be right in front of that stuck-up nose. And I thought I'd seen everything. A hooker with a superiority complex ... Christ."

"I. Am. Not. A. Hooker!" Mercedes was getting increasingly shrill and the couple of girls hovering behind her made futile efforts to get her to simmer down before she really started drawing the wrong kind of attention.

"No, that's true," the older woman conceded, unconcerned by the show of temper and signalling to the prospect who was playing bartender. "At least you could argue a hooker's got business sense – you're just offering up free rides to anyone in a cut. Or blowjobs. I'm betting you get a lot of blowjob requests. Lord knows I'd shove something in that mouth, just so I didn't have to listen to you. Drink?"

Boiling point fast approaching, Mercedes bit down on her lip to the point of pain, her fists clenched tight by her sides. "Who the fuck do you think you are?" she seethed.

"I used to be you."

Ignoring what looked like another row brewing among some of the croweaters by the bar, Tasha rolled her eyes and drained the last of her white wine. But just as she was contemplating whether or not to go investigate the disturbance, toying thoughtfully with the stem of her now empty glass, another bottle appeared over her shoulder.

"Don't worry about that lot," the club president's wife smiled, brushing aside the half-hearted protests. "Come on, I reckon all this organising earns us a top-up before things get too crazy. Don't leave me to drink this alone."

"Well, if it's on doctor's orders ..." Tasha shrugged, handing over the glass for a refill and gazing around the dimly lit room. "It ever get any easier?"

Pausing in pulling up a chair to follow her line of sight, Tara Teller reflected on the sight of the man her own eldest son had become and realised what she meant. "Seeing your baby with that reaper on his back? Nope."

"Not the answer I was hoping for," came the resigned sigh. "But I thought as much."

"If you think it's tough with Leo, just wait until Daniel wants to prospect too."

Tasha snorted at the suggestion and took a long sip of wine. It was a little too dry for her taste, but by now, it was that or hard spirits and she really didn't fancy the hangover. "No need to wait for that. I've known since he pulled the stabilisers off his trike when he was five that he was destined to be another Son one day."

"They were always going to follow in their dads' footsteps, weren't they? Abel and Thomas, Leo and Daniel ..."

It was a concept that filled both women with equal parts pride and dread. The mere thought of their children facing the same level of brutal violence as had more than sporadically blighted their parents' lives was, even after all these years, still enough to chill their blood. And Tasha especially had plenty of just cause for concern. She had, after all, already lost so much.

FLASHBACK

"Tig ..." Tasha started, surprised to open the front door and find the biker with his back to her.

He turned around and she trailed off as soon as she saw the look on his face, endless possibilities already turning over in her mind. Her mind was racing and her heart quickly catching up.

It had to have been nearly twelve hours since she'd been woken in her husband's arms by long, slow goodbye kisses, looking up into those piercing blue eyes as he held her and made her promise not to worry. Twelve hours since he'd dragged himself out of the comfort of their bed and into the shower, before heading out. Club business, something to do with that goddamn cartel - that was all she had known and, to be honest, it had been more disclosure than she wanted. She hated this new danger they'd somehow found themselves caught up in and knew, considering his past, that Kozik did too.

She'd been expecting him home any minute. Or at least on the phone, reassuring her. Instead, she had one of his brothers on the doorstep with that look on his face and ... Jesus, no. She inhaled sharply as she took in the second cut in Tig's arms. "No." There was no masking the devastation in the sharp eyes that struggled to meet hers and, all at once, it was like someone had sucked all the air out of the room. "Oh please, no ..."

Seeming to realise she was already second-guessing him, the usually ruthless sergeant reached for her even as her face started to crumple. She'd have given anything right then to be able to stay frozen in that last moment of denial. But she already knew it was the last moment she'd have before her life changed forever.

"Please, no ..." she begged, clutching at Tig's shirt as she struggled to breathe against the iron band of fear that seemed to have wrapped itself around her chest. "Tell me he's just hurt. Please, oh god, please ..."

"I ... I wish I could," he managed. Despite their years of animosity, his own grief for the man who had once been the closest of his brothers looked like it could threaten to overwhelm even him. "I really do, doll. Jax'll be here soon, but they ... they say there was a landmine and ... and ... Jesus, Tash, I can't believe his dumb ass is gone."

The pure agony in her stricken cry drew stinging tears to his eyes and he crushed her to his chest to rock her clumsily as she broke down completely - sobs racking her body as she clung to him. "I'm so sorry. So fucking sorry, sweetheart."

"Not Koz, not my Koz ..." she cried, as she simply fell apart in his arms.

Giving up trying to soothe her and letting her get it out instead, as hot tears tracked his own cheeks, Tig was at a loss as to what to do for the best and beginning to regret taking it on himself to be the one to break the news. He had felt like he owed Kozik that much, but he wasn't what she needed. Fuck, no one was that, apart from Koz – but maybe Chibs or Bobby would have handled it better and ... Jesus Christ, the kids ...

"Mommy?"

The small scared voice from the doorway made his head turn sharply and a fresh jolt of pain twisted in his gut at the sight. His brother's bright blue eyes seemed to look up at him out of the little girl's face.

"Uncle Tig, why is mommy crying?" Lily whispered, creeping forward just a little.

"Mommy's ... mommy's just very sad right now," he tried, his own voice sounding too husky for his liking as he held out an arm to the frightened child. "C'mere, kiddo – it's okay."

"You should get my daddy," Lily informed him, as she trotted over after his attempt at reassurance. "Daddy would give mommy kisses and make it all better and then she wouldn't be sad anymore."

"Why don't you give her kisses instead for now, baby girl?" Tig suggested gently, scooping her up with one arm and lifting her so she could wrap both hers around Tasha's neck. He hated more than he could say that the little girl had lost the father she adored so very young – her brother Leo barely more than a baby really. "Tash," he murmured in her ear, too low for Lily to hear. "Darlin', you got two kids who need you ... You gotta try. For them."

"You ready to go?"

Startled out of the reverie that seemed to have misted her eyes over, Tasha blinked to clear them before looking up. "You're not staying with the guys?"

"Thought I'd take my wife home."

"You two go on," Tara nodded, seeming to realise how hard a day like this must be and having quietly allowed her friend her moment's reflection. "I got this under control. I'll finish this glass, then once the prospects have their clear-up orders, I'll probably head home anyway. And don't worry about Daniel, he can come stay with Thomas."

"As long as you're sure ..."

For a long time, Tasha had thought that losing the man who had been the centre of her world would be the end of her as well. Or at least the end of the person she had once been. Kozik had been her husband and protector, her lover and her best friend. The fact that he was also the father of her beautiful children had only made everything she felt for him all the stronger. Fiercer. It had never crossed her mind that she would ever have room in her heart for anyone else.

But now, surreal as it could still feel even after all these years, she had another diamond and another band of platinum on her wedding finger. Her feelings for Kozik weren't any less - just different. But she had to be true to the life left to her and everything in it. Her children, Lily and Leo and Daniel, her family. She couldn't get away with just existing when she had them to think about. She had to live, no matter how hard that was without him.

And she had to keep trying to be fair to the man who had been her unexpected rock through the hardest of times.

"Two seconds," she told him.

Crossing the room quickly to ruffle Leo's hair and press a kiss to his temple as she told him she was calling it a night – and warned him not to land himself in the ER – Tasha Lowman stole a last glance around the clubhouse and then slipped her hand into her husband's to follow him into the growing dusk.

"He'd be proud as hell, you know," came his gruff voice, once they were outside and away from the revellers who'd spilled beyond the Redwood doors. "Of Leo. Of you. I'm so fucking proud of you, girl."

A tiny smile tugged at her lips, even as the tears welled up again. "I know."

to be continued ...