"So what happened next?" Mercedes asked. She and Tina were staring at Kurt with excitement, eager to hear the gossip from their raging party.

"Well..."

"Rachel, how about you slow down with the drinks?" Kurt was becoming intoxicated too, but he wasn't half as drunk as the girl beside him. She laughed loudly, much too loudly, and tried to get off the couch. Her feet failed her, and Rachel plummeted back against the cushions.

"Lighten up, Kurt! I'm fine!" Rachel turned around when she felt a tap at her shoulder. Lauren had left to yell at Santana and Brittany for going off and hiding somewhere together, leaving Quinn with a clear path to Rachel.

"Watch where you're going, Man Hands! You almost fell on me!"

"Oh, pull the stick out of your ass, Fabray." Kurt spit his drink across the room when Rachel spoke. He was choking, Quinn was staring at Rachel in horror, and Rachel was getting up. She had had enough of sitting.

"Sorry, Quinn." Kurt cleared his throat and wiped his eyes, letting out one final cough. He watched Rachel's shapeless purple frock with little gold stars on it sway as she walked off. "She's too drunk to know what she's saying."

"Shut it, Fancy." Quinn got up and threw her empty cup on the floor. "I need another drink."

"Well, aren't you a bitch." Kurt crossed his legs and took a sip of his drink. It was slowly going to his head, making the images around him fuzzy and his limbs limp. He saw Brittany run out of a bedroom, slowly followed by Santana, and when the blonde caught his eye she giggled and ran over to him.

"Kurtie!" Brittany yanked him off the couch, almost making him spill his drink on his jeans. He was soon laughing as Brittany pulled him to what had been dubbed the dance floor and started grinding with him.

"Wait a minute!" Everyone groaned as Rachel interrupted the story yet again. "Kurt Hummel, my gay best friend, was grinding with a girl?"

"A pretty girl!" Brittany chirped. Kurt merely shrugged. "When you're drunk enough, you don't care who's ass you're rubbing your cock against. Blaine made out with you, after all." Rachel pursed her lips and Kurt could tell she wouldn't be interrupting again any time soon. "Besides, it's not like I slept with her!"

Finn started snickering in the corner. They all turned to look at him in anticipation of new information. Finn just shook his head, still laughing. "We aren't at that part of the story yet!"

"And we'll get there a lot faster if you all shut the fuck up!" Kurt said haughtily. All eyes we once again on him, so he took the opportunity to continue.

Kurt rode with Brittany in front of him, a drunken Santana sneaking in front of her to join the action. Kurt could feel eyes on him, but he was too inebriated to care who's they were. Brittany almost fell over when the boy supporting her was pulled away by Rachel.

"Dance with me!" she begged, tugging his arm with a look of pleading in her unfocused eyes. Kurt frowned and asked, "Why so urgent?"

"Finn and Puck. They keep bringing me drinks and saying nice things to me, so I wanna make them jealous."

"Yes, because dancing with me will totally do that."

"I know, right?" Rachel handed Kurt one of her two drinks and attempted to do what Brittany had just been doing, though Kurt admittedly thought Brittany was much better at it. The blonde was, however, jamming her tongue down Santana's throat at the moment, so he would have to settle for Berry. She laughed loudly, too loudly for it to seem realistic. "Oh Kurt, you're such a good dancer!"

"Thanks?" Kurt knew he was being used, but he didn't mind much. Finn was watching Rachel, but Kurt was delighted to find that Puck's eyes were on him (and the way Puck was standing, trying to conceal his crotch, told Kurt that he liked what he saw). The countertenor took that moment to dip, his tight jeans squeezing his ass as he did so. Poor Puckerman, he nearly had a heart attack.

"Hummel, that's a lie and you know it!" Puck stood up and pointed a finger at Kurt, who chuckled at the gesture.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, Noah. Though, it seems like you slept just fine next to me." Their friends responded with a mixture of laughter and catcalls. Puck's blush reached up to his mohawk as he sat back down.

Kurt smirked and leaned over to Rachel. "You aren't the only one who got lucky last night." Her jaw dropped and she burst out laughing, but stifled it quickly when everyone looked at them. Kurt smirked. "I think I'll leave him hanging for a bit longer," he whispered, "he clearly doesn't remember the mind-blowing sex..." He turned back to the group. "Anyway, back to my story!"

"Rachel. Rachel!" Kurt stopped dancing as Rachel turned and started running her hands down the sides of his vest. "Too far, sweetheart." She giggled quietly but stopped touching him. She glanced over at the two football players. Finn was watching her with curiosity and confusion, obviously not understanding that she was trying to make him jealous. He was probably happy, actually, that she had chosen to covet his gay stepbrother. Noah, on the other hand, was gripping his beer bottle with barbarity and watched the two dance without moving.

"Let's grab some more drinks," said Kurt as he walked towards the table full of snacks and booze. Puck and Finn shuffled aside to let the pair through. Kurt snickered and bumped Rachel with his shoulder. "They look upset that they aren't dancing with you."

Yes, Finn and Puck were envious, but there was a third person in the room more jealous than the two boys combined.

Kurt coughed loudly. "Miss Fabray? Do you know who that other person was?"

Quinn crossed her arms and flipped her hair in an attempt to be nonchalant. "Maybe."

"So you wanna continue the story from here?"

She sighed, throwing one last glance at Rachel. "Yeah, I guess."