A/N: SO this is going to be sad, I'm sorry, but it will. It's set, probably around season 5 because Ryder has re-joined the Glee Club after the cat-fishing incident.

Enjoy...

'I Guess We Didn't Really Know Her at All'

"Is everybody here?" Asks Mr Shu as he walks into the classroom.

"Not Kitty, but who cares, just start Mr Shu," Tina, ever hateful. How does she know something isn't wrong with Kitty. I just don't understand why Tina has to be so mean to Kitty, Kitty's not so bad anymore, she's kind of my friend now and she's all good.

"Marley's not here yet, either," Jake speaks up from beside me, "And I don't know where she would be."

"Well their all buddy buddy now, so they'll probably come in together," say Unique. I still hate her, but I re-joined Glee because Kitty begged, she actually, legitly begged for me to re-join, Jake and Marley asked, but Kitty begged, surprisingly. I figured she wanted me back to have another person on her side in her mini war with Tina, so I agreed.

Five minutes into the lesson Marley comes in, she looks lost, and almost like she's been crying. Jake immediately jumps up to ask her what's wrong. She just ignores him, and flops into Jake's now empty seat next to me, then Jake takes her other side and holds her hand. I seriously wonder what's wrong with her.

Twenty minutes later and she's silently sobbing next to me. I only notice because we are told to get into groups of four, and that's what sets her off.

"There's only three of us," she sighs, trying to stop the tears. The entire glee club is one person short. There is three groups of four and one of three, we are a group of three."

"Your upset, when you do math like this, your upset," states Jake as he pats his girlfriend's back soothingly.

"Where's Kitty?" I ask, as I attempt to do that rubber pencil thing, fail.

Marley starts sobbing more, and I turn to face her. "She had that appointment this morning, a check up. And that tiny lump thing on her arm she's been going on about, she got that checked out and ..." She's crying so much now that se can't talk. I sort of pat her arm, will Jake hugs her, it must look awkward, because Mr Shu comes over to ask us what's wrong.

"Is something up?" he asks and crouches next to Marley, "What's the Matter?"

"Stop asking me what's wrong!" she yells, jumping up and storming out of the room. Jake follows her, but I stay put.

I think something's wrong with Kitty.

...

Kitty doesn't come to school for the next two weeks, and everyday Tina says something new:

"Lazy bitch, doesn't she know how important Nationals is to all of us, we can't compete if the dumb bitch doesn't start coming to school!"

"Not here again, best week ever!"

"Well I'm Kitty, I'm so special that I don't have to come to school."

"Glad she's gone, I wish the worst on her",

"I'm a dumb blonde b..."

We'd all had enough, but Marley was the one to take a stand. "Shut the hell up Tina! You don't know what she's going through!" wow, Marley was fired up, I don't think I've ever seen her this mad. "I am so sick of you Tina. I'm on my last straw with you. So you. Need. To. Shut. Up. Now!"

"Why should I, why should I give a crap about what you want, and why should I give a crap about Kitty. Why don't you tell us why we should care. Because honestly no one likes the heartless Bitch!"

"She has Cancer."

The whole room went silent. I couldn't believe it. The fearless, 'heartless', bitchy, tough (and beautiful) Kitty Wilde had cancer. How? No one deserves this, no one.

I was the first one out of the room. Why hadn't Marley told us, why hadn't Kitty told me, I thought she trusted me. I had to go see her. Now.

So I left the choir room, I know Marley and Jake followed, but I didn't turn back to talk to them.

Apparently, Tina followed too, apologizing, begging for us to forgive her because she didn't know. None of us had known, except Marley, but no one else had said that they 'Wish the Worst' on her. Tina could be a real bitch, because cancer was the worst.

...

"Apparently she had it when she was eight, and it's come back," sighed Marley. We were sitting in the hallway, waiting for school to end. We couldn't leave until the bell, and Coach Sylvester was guarding the door.

"This sucks," I groan, slamming my head back into the lockers behind me.

"Anyone, having cancer sucks," adds Jake.

"No, I just mean not being able to see her right now. I need to tell her stuff,"

"What stuff?" I swear I see Marley crack the tiniest of tiny smiles, it's as if she already knows.

"Well something like this really puts things into prospective and... I just need to see how she is. Like right now!"

"Climb out the window," states Jake like it's obvious. "That's what I do when I wag." He takes one look at Marley and apparently it's a new story, "When I used to wag... my brother told me about it, okay, jeez. Guy can't have a bad past these days."

"I 'm gonna go," I announce jumping up, and making my way to the nearest window.

"Ryder," I turn back to look at Jake.

"Yeah?" I ask

"Don't say anything stupid."

Like that's not obvious.

...

I arrive in front of Kitty's house, and now I'm nervous, before I really knew what I was doing, and now I don't. What am I supposed to say? how am I supposed to act? what if I do say something stupid? Knowing me, I probably will.

Gathering my courage, I knock on the door. 'Do I want her to be home or not?'

Her mum answers the door, her mum doesn't know me. "Mrs Wilde," I greet her with a nod, but no smile. "I'm one of Kitty's friends." Her eyes look watery.

"Sure," she says and looks at the ground, "I presume you want to see her, like the other girl."

I nod "That's what I was hoping."

Mrs Wilde turns to look behind herself, then back at me, "I doubt she'll let you, she's barely talking to us, and she wouldn't let... Marley, I think it was, see her. It's up to Kitty."

Again I nod "Of course."

I wait at the door while her mother retreats up the stairs in search of her daughter. Marley, had forgotten to give the little fact that she hadn't even seen her yet! Now if Kitty said no, I would look like a total idiot.

"You can come up now," says her mother, and I about jump out of my skin, wait did she say I could go up? "Are you coming up or not dear?"

"Yeah," I say quickly making my way up the stairs two at a time.

"Someone's excited," she breaks into a tiny smile, though it must be hard.

I walk into Kitty's bedroom, she's sitting on a chair in front of her window with her knees drawn right up to her chin. She looked broken, and I almost lost it right then. She turns to look at me, and smiles. Like maybe she's happy to see me, or that someone has come to visit her, but then I remember she never let Marley in.

"I know what you're thinking," she starts, "You are allowed to see me, because you won't cry and make me sad, but Marley, she's like a broken water bottle when something bad happens. And I don't want that. I want to be happy."

"How? How could you be happy," I crouch next to her.

"Because it's the only way I'm going to get better. Being negative, and being around negativity won't help. Laughter is the best medicine, remember?"

...

We sit and talk, mostly about glee, and some other things, but still mostly glee, because it makes her happy.

"Dancing makes you happy," I say, "And singing I guess, but you are always smiling when you're dancing. Like a big smile. I used to think it was just another bitchy smile, but turns out, when I got to know you, that it's a rare happy smile,"

She laughs, like actually giggles, it's cute. "Well you are a good dance partner, you never drop me."

"Only because if I do, you'll kill me. So I'm extra careful."

Marley and Jake don't end up coming. And around five her mum comes in and says Kitty needs to rest, and that it's time for me to go.

She walks me to the door, I told her she didn't have to, but she insisted. "Bye," I say and turn to leave.

"Not taking things for granted anymore, means doing everything to the fullest," she says, and I turn back around to face her.

"I want a hug," she smiles and I oblige, "A proper hug Ryder, I'm not a porcelain doll." So I give her a big bear hug, lifting her off the ground, earning a happy squeal from the tiny blonde girl.

"Much better," she smiles. "Bye."

...

I go and visit her every Tuesday, Wednesday and Sunday. I would go more often, but I'm busy those days. It's always hard Thursday, Friday and Saturday, because when I go to her house on Sunday, her mother says she misses me, and that makes me feel worse about not coming more often.

She doesn't come to school anymore, at least not until she's well.

Her first chemo session is on Thursday, and she's terrified.

"I sort of remember when I was eight, I only remember how horrible it was, feeling sick, being sick. All my hair going away." She clutches at her hair, and I notice tears starting to form. "I don't want to loose my hair, it's the worst part. Knowing that I'll look ugly. That I'll feel ugly."

She starts crying and I hold her for most of the afternoon, telling her that she'll still be beautiful, and that I'll tell her that everyday, to make her feel better. Because hair isn't everything. It really isn't.

"I'd shave my head, if it made you feel better."

She starts laughing, "Please don't, it'll make your ears look enormous, and I can't handle that."

That sounded more like the Kitty we all know and love. "Thank-you," I say, I hadn't been sure I actually wanted to do it, but I would have for her anyway.

"No, thank-you for the incredibly sweet gesture."

I give her another enormous hug goodbye, she doesn't squeal the same as she normally does, but I know that's just because she's scared, I am too.

...

"How is she?" asked Marley, at school on Monday. She had been to visit now, twice, and cried both times, so that's why she hasn't been back. Jake has been three times, and he can't stand how she doesn't insult him the same way she used to, so that's why he doesn't visit her often.

It's weird, weird how no one likes something until it's gone. The glee club misses her real bad, it's not the same without her constant criticism coming think and fast. Even Tina sometimes asks how she is.

My answer's the same for everybody, "Fine, at the moment." I mean what else can I say, the chemo's going fine, her hairs falling out and she's upset. But she doesn't want people to know all of that. And that's fine with me, it just doesn't go down so well with everyone else, I still hold my ground though.

I tell Marley a little more than the others, only because they're best friends, and Kitty gave me special permission, seeing as neither Marley, nor Kitty could handle a visit.

"Emotionally, she's a wreck," I say. Marley's eyes start to tear up. "If you can't handle me just telling you Marls, then how can you ever visit her?"

"I don't know," she sobs. "I want to be strong, but I can't. I'm trying. I want to be there for Kitty, but I'm a sook. Can you tell her that I'm trying really hard to be stong for her, and that in a couple of weeks I might try visiting again, okay?"

"Yep, can do" I nod.

It's not like I haven't cried over this, I just haven't cried in front of anyone. I cry in my room, by myself, where no one can see me. I had never cried before, at least not that I can remember. I just came home one day after visiting her, and lost it. I spose it had been a bad day, he Sunday after her first chemo, she'd puked a few times while I was there, she looked a funny colour and so fragile and hollow, and she most definitely was not herself. To know she had to go through six more sessions of this, really got to me. I feel awful for her. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.

...

Kitty and I were watching a movie I had bought for her, The last Twilight movie, it was actually pretty good. (Jake would tell me to bite my tongue, but I will no) Over the last few visits Marley and I had made (that's right Marley) we had watched the previous movies in the series, and I like them (Jake would kill me). But there is a lot of action, so they're cool, I love al the fight stuff, though I kind of wanted the wolf to rip the smug vampire a new one, I know the names, but if I mention them it'll become habit and I may end up saying something to Marley in front of Jake, and that wouldn't end well.

But I could understand why Kitty was always talking about them. We were all sitting on Kitty's big bed, Kitty was in the middle, mostly to keep her from falling off. Don't get me wrong, she was really strong today, today was a good day for her, but we were being overly cautious.

The movie finished, and oh my god had not been expecting that twist, best part of all the movies, like seriously so good! Anyway, Marley had to leave at like four and Kitty's parents were out grocery shopping, so I would stay with her until they got back, maybe longer, depends on when Kitty needs to sleep.

"I have more chemo on Tuesday," she sighs. "Right as I get over this dose, there's more."

"Sucks," I say pulling her closer.

"Ryder," she looks up at me, and I look down at her. "Can I try something."

"What?"

She smiles, then moves closer to me, still smiling, she kisses me. I pull back slightly, having not expected it.

Her smile disappears.

"You don't like me? Or is it because I'm sick and my hair is starting to fall out, and I'm creepy skinny now."

I shake my head, then lean forward and our lips meet again. "You just gave me a fright," I whisper into our kiss." She giggles, and pushes me so she is above me. We take a breather, and I look up at her, her eyes look happy, they're shinning like they haven't in ages, like they used to when she smiled, when she argued with someone, when she was just Kitty. The Kitty we all know and love.

That I love.

...

Two years later Kitty is once again declared Cancer free, she made it through. She's alive, and happy and my girlfriend. And she gets to come back to school for Senior year, and then go to College.

She has everything in front of her, and I'm going to be there for her for as long as she wants me to be.

A/N: So what did you think, sad? But I had to give it a happy ending, I can't make things too sad and then leave it at that, it's not nice, and treat others the way you would like to be treated right?

Anyway, please review and send me any requests you may have :D