Chapter 2

"Who are you and what is your business in Rivendell?" The tall guy asked.

"Get that thing out of my face." I pointed to the bow he was holding. See, when people point stuff at me in a threatening matter, my only instinct is to throw insults and generally piss them off. It's probably going to get me killed some day but I really don't care.

"Answer my question." He growled.

I feigned ignorance. "Can you remind me what you wanted?"

He tightened his grip on the string and I narrowed my eyes. "Alright. Sheesh. I don't even know where I am. Give a gal a break, Buster." For some reason he lowered his bow.

"You don't know where you are?"

"No. One minute I'm chilling in my house and the next I'm waking up and being a attacked by a freaking giant spider. Now where are we?"

"Rivendell." He answered and stepped towards me. His eyes were a striking blue. There was something about him pulling at the back of my mind but I pushed it away as I reasoned that I'd only just met him. "You'd better come with me." He said.

"Where?" I asked warily.

"To the palace of Elrond."

"Wait, what? Elrond? Rivendell? You're pulling my leg…jerk." I added the last insult as an afterthought.

"I'm not touching you." He answered sincerely. He held up his hands as proof.

"So what, you're Legolas? Nice try pal."

The guys blue eyes flashed and narrowed. "How do you know my name?"

"I said stop, alright? This isn't funny! Take me back home this instant or so help me I'll bend you into pretzel!" I threatened. He just shrugged.

"I have no idea where your home is. You'll have to ask Gandalf. As for the…pretzel?…I'd like to see you try." With that he turned and began walking back the way he'd come. I stood and watched him, wondering what I should do. This guy was obviously a loony. Middle Earth was all a part of a story. An amazingly awesome and detailed story, true, but that didn't make it real. Then again, the spider thing was definitely real. I had the bruises to prove it.

"You'd better hurry." The Legolas look alike called over his shoulder. "Orcs will smell the spider's blood. They'll be here soon." Just like that I took off after him.

"Wait one cotton picking minute!" I shrieked. "You're Aragorn?" The guy nodded.

"Lady Rebecca please stop shouting."

"And you're Gandalf?" I rounded on the old guy. The wizard winked at me. "But you're still grey." Everyone stopped.

"Still grey? Gandalf the Grey has been my name for many an age."

"Oh snap! So the ring… and Frodo… and the… oh crap. It hasn't happened yet has it?" One look at everyone's face told me they all thought I was psycho. "Listen, in my world there's a story about you guys. It's really popular, they even made into a movie."

"A story?" Gandalf asked pretentiously.

"What is a movie?" Aragorn asked.

"It's a moving picture."

"But how-"

"It's magic." I interrupted him. Aragorn nodded like that made perfect sense. I thought of something just then.

"Where's Gimli? Please don't tell me we aren't going to do this without Gimli for comic relief. Or at least Pippin."

We were doing this thing without Gimli. No one even knew who he was yet. As far as I could tell I was about 10 to 15 years before the Fellowship of the Ring started. Evil was on the rise but a dark wizard was helping Sauron to locate the one ring, Gandalf explained. He was also mass-producing orcs and trolls using his dark magic. The pre-Fellowship had tried to stop them, but one of their elves was captured. His name was Telham of Mirkwood. We had to rescue him.

Legolas led me to a bedchamber and left promising that a servant would come shortly. I took stock of the room. It was cozy with a small bed, a wooden table and chairs with soft looking pillows. There were wide windows facing the east and north. The view was incredible. I was up on the third story so I could see the crowns on the trees swaying in the gentle breeze. And the air! I'd never smelled such clean, fresh air.

"M'lady?" A pretty, dark haired elf was standing in the doorway. She had a cloth bundle in her arms. She looked me up and down and smiled.

"Hi." I said, feeling suddenly shy.

"I have a dress here that will fit you perfectly." She unfolded the bundle and it transformed into a lovely pale blue gown with a full skirt and long sleeves.

"It's gorgeous!" I gasped. I ran my fingers gently over the smooth silk.

"It will be perfect for riding." The elf said.

"What?" I was appalled. "I can't ride a horse in that!"

The elf looked shocked. "Why ever not?"

"Because." I sputtered. "I've never ridden in a dress. I'll rip it or fall off. I need some pants." I thought the girl was going to faint.

"Pants?" She said softly.

I nodded. "Like Legolas or Aragorn."

"But…M'lady! Prince Legolas and Lord Aragorn are… well,-"

"Men?" I cut her off.

"Yes m'lady."

"Fine. But I'll tell you right now; there is no way you're going to get me into that dress. It'll be pants or nothing."

"Why are you all such a boys club?" I asked. The pretty elf girl had found me a red tunic, a pair of pants and some boots that fit. We were sitting in the hall eating a meal while discussing how to save Telham.

"What do you mean?" Aragorn paused mid bite.

"I mean every member of your armies and guards and all that is a guy. There are no women fighting or doing anything other than traditional female roles. But guys can learn to cook and have to be able to mend their own clothes and wash them and all that. You're male shnavists."

"We're WHAT?" Aragorn laughed. I scowled at him.

"Need I remind you m'lady, that you are a woman and you are being included on this extremely dangerous mission."

"But no other ladies are coming. Or ever will."

"You are…" Aragorn searched for a word. "Special."

"And don't you forget it." I growled.