Alright, so, I realized that I forgot to END the first chapter.... ahahahaha. I'm such a ditz.

So if you want to check it out, feel free! ^w^

And, also, I've been busy with 5 stories all at once, and its been epic trying to get one chapter out in a week. My brain is fried, and I'm just looking for some other ideas, so if you want me to write a story for no reason what-so-ever, all I need to ask is no Twilight... Unless I get to kill Edward. No offense meant to any Twilight fans. I just don't like Edward. All the other vamps are fine, just not Edward.

As I read on one of my friends shirts-

And then Buffy staked Edward.

The End

Our story begins in the far reaches of the country, where our intrepid trio-

Intrepid trio?

I have to give them SOME dignity.

Alright then.

As I was saying… Where our intrepid trio stood, ready for battle.

Wait, I thought only Euard had a weapon…

Oh, that's right. Dragon has the weapons… And for equality, the elf's arrows were in the shop, getting repaired.

That's a horrible excuse! Let's try…

While the girls squabbled, Toris the knight looked at his brothers. "We are so going to fail…" He said, shaking his head as Euard's bow faded from its master's hands.

"But, don't we have to save the princess? It IS the only way to end the story." Ravis piped up, struggling to stand as snow encased him from about his armpits down.

Taking pity on him, Euard heaved the three foot tall gnome onto his shoulders. "Or we could kill ourselves. That should end the story."

"And then we'd die." Toris said, staring at his feet. He was surprised his feet hadn't frozen yet in the snow. He wasn't uncomfortable in his suit of armor, it felt like it was a simple extension of his body. A solid, durable part of his body.

"Touche." Euard said, and Ravis the gnome gently set his head on his older brother's head.

Toris looked them all over. A gnome, elf, and knight. This felt like one of Arthur's stories Alfred had told him about in the short space of time that Toris had lived with the eccentric American. Only this story was worse. MUCH worse. "We are definitely an intrepid trio." He said, shaking his head. "Let's just get this over with-"

Nope! You gents have to start at the beginning of the quest. As in, square one.

"Damn it." Ivanna's voice came floating down from the tower.

Toris pulled a mock serious face before he bowed. "Do not worry my princess, I will rescue you."

Even serious Euard had to hide smirks of laughter as snow started to surround them. Toris could hear Ivanna's growl as the snow blurred his vision, and he felt his feet lift from the ground.

It was disorienting at first, the feeling of floating. But when the spinning stopped, Toris found him and his brothers in a field covered in sunflowers.

Our story begins in a field of sunflowers, where a fierce battle had reigned. Battered and bruised, our heroes stood, the flags of the countries flew proudly over the battlefield where-

"Like, I totally saw it all!" A blonde head appeared from behind a rock, much to the shock of Toris and his brothers.

WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING IN THIS????

I… don't know. Let's just go with it.

… Fine.

"You were, like, completely amazing!" Felix said, perching himself on top of the rock he had hidden behind. Or what appeared to be Felix. He looked like the Felix Toris had grown up with, but the pair of tan cat ears that sat on his head and the tail that swished calmly behind him said otherwise. "You, like, completely saved my home and me from them! That was like, ubber nice!"

The neko Felix jumped gracefully onto the ground on all fours, and he padded gracefully around Toris and the others. "You know, you should so wear some brighter colors. They'd look so good with your outfits."

We can't keep letting him go on like this.

Agreed.

Felix stopped, rising to his hind feet. "You should come home with me! It's lots of fun, and I have lots of food!"

Don't do it…

Toris… Remember the last time Felix gave you food…

Don't do it…

Toris frowned at the Fae and Sibyl's voices, somewhat annoyed. It was obvious Felix couldn't hear them, or he would have blushed at the mention of the brownie incident. But then, Toris hadn't known that Felix couldn't tell the difference between sugar and salt.

"Oh, can't we?" Ravis asked, his eyes wide. He had always liked Felix, who was much kinder to him than Ivan.

As tempting as it may have been to go and be warm somewhere, Toris shook his head. "No, we mustn't impose on you. We are on a journey to save the princess, despite her anger issues."

Oh, you know Ivan would so kill Toris if he actually said that.

Totally.

Toris sighed and waved to his brothers. "Come, we make haste so we can be done with this story."

Felix growled. "Oh no. Princess Ivanna is, like, sealed away so that this land may forever know winter. My people and I cannot, like, allow you to do this." And with that, he threw back his head and yowled.

Well, I for one didn't see this coming.

Well, I guess that makes me a better writer.

Let's not and never speak of this again.

Toris' eyes went wide. "Umm, Felix? You can stop with the creepy cat call now…"

But Felix was transforming, his fingernails growing long and sharp, his eyes changing to be more cat-like, and he began to look more and more like a were-cat.

"We should run." Euard said.

I agree. This is a creepy Felix.

Toris and Euard started running as fast as their feet could carry them, uneager to become catnip for Felix and his fellow cat-people. Toris looked back, watching as more and more cat creatures appeared, and bit his lip. "This doesn't look good for us Euard."

Ravis nodded his agreement. "If only we had the real Felix here. He'd know how to stop this faker!"

Toris looked up at the sky and yelled, "FAE! STOP THIS!"

AUGH! DON'T LOOK AT ME! I don't know how to help!

Toris sighed. Ravis was right. Only Felix knew how he worked himself.

A memory of Felix dragging him through a mall gave Toris an idea. He grabbed Euard's arm and dragged him to the left. "Quick, I have an idea."

Euard followed, a curious expression on his face. "What are you doing Toris?"

Yes, what ARE you doing Toris?

Toris suddenly pulled to a halt and, turning towards the stampeding herd of were-cats, pointed to a small town further towards the left. "Oh my god, look! A sale on Gucci!"

The lead cat stopped, and an exact second later, it turned with a poof back into Felix. "Oh my god, let's go!"

Euard and Ravis watched with their mouths hanging open as the were-cats turned back into humans and tore after their shopaholic leader.

Euard turned to his darker haired brother. "How on earth did you know?"

Toris shrugged. "Felix can't resist Gucci. Even a pseudo-Felix can't resist it."

Ravis paused, narrowing his eyes at his eldest brother. "How did you know?"

Toris paused, then started to walk away. "I didn't."

Fae's celestial voice started laughing, Ravis paled, and Euard yelled, "What do you mean, you didn't know? You mean you put us all at risk for NOTHING?"

Well, I thought it was brilliant. Well done Toris. You and brothers can now proceed onwards…

What the hell is with this proceed onwards shit? You make it seem like Chopped or some cooking show.

It felt right, so just go with it!

… Alright, but I get to choose what happens next.

Toris smiled, knowing Fae would probably be easier on the three of them.

As they left their um… enemy shopping in their dust, the three moved onwards to their challenge, unaware of the horrors that awaited them.

Toris gulped. Maybe he was wrong about that.