"Cup of coffee, Master Bruce?"
Bruce Wayne nearly fell out of his chair as he scrambled to close down the web page he'd been reading in the batcave.
Alfred placed a tray down on the desk, his eyebrow raised. "Secret research?"
Bruce looked intently at the steaming mug of coffee and mumbled, "Something like that."
"No need to stop on my account," he said, and Bruce's cheeks began to feel very warm.
"Oh, it can wait," he said with a wave of the hand. "Thank you, Alfred. For the coffee." He took a deep breath and sipped the rich, hot liquid.
"Well, Sir," said Alfred after a pause. "I'll leave you to your research. Let me know if you need anything."
Bruce spluttered after a gulp of coffee burned his throat. Did Alfred know? He waited until the old man was safely back up the stairs, scanned the batcave to make sure he was alone again, and reopened his browser. Gotham City Fanfiction. He'd come across the site last night, and was sure that something or someone sinister must have something to do with it.
"Who could be behind this?" he muttered to himself, scrolling down the enormous list of stories under the tag "Batman," including a good many whose mere descriptions made his cheeks burn. "Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to read another one... Just to get more insight into the mind of whoever's responsible, of course."
He sheepishly looked over his shoulder, before eagerly clicking on a story also labelled "Catwoman" and "Nightwing."
"A meeting with Catwoman inspires some conflicting emotions for Batman... Hmm, interesting," he muttered to himself as he began to read.
His cheeks flushed as the story almost immediately took a racy turn. He felt a stirring between his legs as his eyes drank in phrases such as, "He came up behind her and kissed her neck. His hot breath tickled her, sending a frisson through the small of her back," and, "She gave a low, hungry moan as he left a hot trail of kisses over her breasts and stomach, stopping just short of the lush curls where her thighs met."
He unzipped his trousers, and loosened them just enough to fit a hand inside. This story was everything he'd fantasised about Selina and more; the guilt he felt about reading it melted away as he focussed more on his pleasure. He scrolled down lazily through the rest of the story with his free hand, but by then he wasn't paying attention to the words.
Unfortunately, he wasn't paying attention to anything else either; Nightwing crept into the batcave and froze at the sight of Bruce sitting with his head back, panting and moaning. He wasn't sure whether to back right out of there and try to erase the incident from memory or say something to get Bruce's attention. He settled for a strangled cough.
"Bruce?" he called as the other man gasped and scrambled to fasten his belt.
"This isn't what it looks like," said Bruce. Dick had never seen him this flustered before. It was quite out of character for the usually suave billionaire playboy.
Dick raised an eyebrow. "What is this anyway?"
He walked over to the computer before Bruce could get himself together enough to close the browser.
"Okay, I'm just going to repeat my original question – what the Hell is this anyway?"
Bruce looked at the screen, and was mortified by the words in front of him.
"I've always been fond of you," said Batman. "I've tried to forget about you, but even when I've been with Catwoman, you're always there somewhere in my thoughts. The truth is, I long for you, Nightwing."
Nightwing was quiet for a moment, digesting the other man's words. "You... Love me?"
Even in the shadows, Batman's cheeks were an unusual shade of pink. "I – I shouldn't have said anything." He turned to slip away, but the younger man was too quick, and grabbed his arm urgently.
"Don't go..." he said, and leaned closer until his lips brushed Batman's.
Batman pulled away and looked at his partner in crime-fighting, before returning the kiss passionately. The softness of his lips contrasted beautifully with the light graze of his stubble, and Nightwing thought his knees would give way.
"Really, Bruce? Really?" Nightwing wasn't sure whether to laugh or be serious. After a moment's thought, he decided the latter was more appropriate. "Do you... Do you actually have those kind of feelings? For me, I mean?"
"This isn't what it looks like," Bruce insisted again. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "You're like a son to me, I couldn't..."
Dick nodded. "Okay," he said slowly. "So what's the story behind this incredibly awkward situation?"
Blushing furiously, Bruce scrolled upwards and cleared his throat. "I was thinking about Selina."
Dick glanced at the beginning of the story, and looked back at Bruce. "I think you need to find a woman who isn't secretly a supervillain and get laid. I mean, I know it's hard in a city like Gotham, but I'd really appreciate it if the walking-in-on-Batman-enjoying-himself-to-smutty-fanfiction thing never happened ever again."
"I can't argue with that," said Bruce. After a pause he added, "I was doing genuine research at first though."
Dick couldn't hold back a chuckle. "Sure you were."
"Have you seen this website?" He navigated back to the Gotham City Fanfiction homepage. "It's so full of slander and lies, there must be something more sinister behind it. I thought maybe..."
Bruce was drowned out by Dick's laughter.
"Oh, come on, Bruce. That's the worst excuse I've ever heard." Bruce wasn't smiling. "Oh, you're serious? Look... Batman, Nightwing... Whether the people of Gotham see us as heroes or villains, with a cape and cowl comes mystery. We inspire gossip and legends. Did you never make up stories about your heroes when you were a kid? Honestly, I've known about the website for a while, but I always took it as a compliment."
"Hmm." Bruce wasn't convinced, but he didn't want to push the matter. "Why did you come here anyway? Anything to report?"
"There's been another string of robberies. Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy are prime suspects at the moment. I was hoping you'd help me track them down, but you were, uh..."
"Let's just pretend nothing happened and move on, shall we Dick? Give me a few minutes and I'll get ready."
Dick sniggered. "Okay, Bruce. I'll get on the computer while you compose yourself."